I can't wait to see how the rest of the story unfolds. I'll be waiting for the next chapter :) great job like always :)
-ScriptieAuthor's Response: Thanks for your praise as always. The story is on hold because I have writers block so if you have any suggestions they are welcome and appreciated, you can PM me over the forums, my penname is the same. Report Review
someday, i thought it'll be curious if Harry disappeared from Muggle-World (UK) and only would be seen by the clues he left, like a riddle for muggles or smthg.Author's Response: Yeah it would, but my story isnt going to be the one where you find it. Report Review
You have a lot of promise. Be careful to watch your grammaticl errors. It can be a distraction when I am trying to find your brother point of view.
I was interested in your overall concept. I could understand the trauma of Hermione's 7th year causing her to give up magic--although shocking. But would she have given up being such an independent powerful woman? That was a sticking point--because Hermione is such a strong female archetype of women's intellect, independence and sulf sufficiency.
Additionally, I also ask that you find a clever way to introduce exposition into your stories without breaking the fourth wall and talking directly to the audience. Perhaps the way the 7th book begins with the character reading a newspaper about recent events. But overall your story caught my interest.Author's Response: Glad you liked it. I have a beta now so She is going to Edit the Grammar stuff and i'll edit them.
I'll also go back and read my chapter to see what you mean about breaking the fourth wall, all to often an author does not distinguish the ideas in their brains so that it looks good written or that a reader can understand it. I always try to go back and read through my story as somebody who would be reading it. If I still don't see what you mean, than i'll ask my beta for Her opinion on it. Thank you so much for the review. Report Review
I like what you did, but i think you took away from the "Witch" and made her a muggle! i understand that she gave up, but you would have to throw in SOME longing for her magical past! otherwise, its not harry potter, its a soap opera! but i do like your imaginative thoughts!Author's Response: It is only chapter one so when i next write in Hermione's POV I will keep that in mind because you're right, it would not be Harry Potter. Thank's for the review and the reminder and the compliment i'll work on that in chapter three. Report Review
I haven't read this and I am trying to be as nice as possible. If you are going to create fan fiction please get the main character's name spelled right it is Hermione not Hermionie.Author's Response: sorry... you really shouldn't tell somebody that you didn't read their story it is rather rude, if you would actually read further in my story you may possible realize that spelling is my fail point so i'm working on it, please don't be rude, or don't review unless you read my chapter, thank you. Report Review
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