Wow, what a great start! I love that you've altered the language and grammar a bit to reflect the era and your character's level of education. I like that you're taking the persecution of non-witches seriously...it was a truly horrible period of European history, but I feel like it's usually portrayed lightly in the HP universe. If you're looking for some good background material about medieval witchcraft/witchcraft trials and stuff, PM me on the forums (same name, wenderbender)...I studied this era for my thesis, so I can point you towards some good resources!
Looking forward to the next chapter.
^_^Author's Response: Are you kiding! You're like a gift send from above, seriously! Id love some help with the bacground material. I've read all i could find on the net, but somehow it seems superfluous. Thank you so much. And Im so happy that you like the start of the story by the way. It means a lot from someone who knows the period Im writing about. I have always been very taken with witch-hunts, they make my skin crawl and make me angry lots of the time. One of the best proofs that man's ignorance is really dangerous and im goign to try and get that feeling across.
I really tried my best to work with language and grammar, but it has hard since i havent read a lot of old english books.
I'll definitely pm you, thank you for offering! And thank you for the review, of course! Report Review
Wow. This was amazing.
You've revealed so little information about this girl yet immediately the reader can bond with her and feels some kind of connection.
Really, this is brilliant. Congratulations.
You might want to use Microsoft Word, because it spell checks for you and checks your punctuation and grammar, but even the very few mistakes couldn't take away from this miraculous writing.
Really, I'm quite astounded, it's absolutely awesome. And not as in the American 'awesome', but as in it fills me with awe.
10/10, even though it's only the first chapter and I should leave room for improvement in my marks, I just CAN'T give this less than a ten, it would be an injustice.
Beautiful.Author's Response: Hi! My very first reviewer for this story! And you liked it, Im so glad! I know that the grammar and punctuation was particularly horrible in this piece, thats because i was so exited that i finished it, that i posted even before editing. Im an impatient person ;P So over the roof that you still enjoyed it though! Thanks so much for taking the time to say so.
Im so happy that you can relate to her and that you want to know about her. I tried to write this in third person at first, but it didnt feel right somehow. It was just too personal a story to make it in third. Knowing that you like this so much right from the start,makes me even more determined to do my best and keep up the good work in the next chapters! I have written a part of it. I hope you come back and that you like the rest!
Thank you so much for the amazing review! Report Review
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