Nice first chapter! I happened to check your author's page and was happy to see this here from a month ago. I like how you start with Peter's dream, and this sounds like it's going to be a very creative story. There were a few times when you switched from present tense to past tense (like when you used woke instead of wake, or said instead of say). Also, I'm feel like this was a short chapter and that you could have more action in it so that the reader could get to know Peter as a character better. I like how you use first person because I think it gives the story a more personal feel. I look forward to seeing where this goes! :) AetherAuthor's Response: Thank you! I'm hoping this will be a really creative story, once I finally have time to finish it! And thank you for the CC! It helps(: Report Review
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