HOW DID I NOT FIND THIS SOONER?! OMIGOSH LINDS, I'M ABSOLUTELY AWESTRUCK!
Hehehe, I wasn't going to make this entire review into capslock, it doesn't look too pretty. Before anything, I apologize profusely for not reading this sooner. I've just started a week-long holiday so here's your overdue review.
Just when I thought I've seen your best, you go and prove me wrong by putting this out. I was definitely intrigued, I can't recall ever having read an Augusta Longbottom-centric fic and now that I have, I'll forever hold this as the standard to any other similar fics. With 'Pusillanimous' being the first word of the story, I had to look it up. When I found the meaning, I was even more intrigued with how you were going to portray Augusta in such a way since the Mrs. Longbottom we all know from canon is a seriously scary but butt-kicking grandmother. But I was entralled from start to finish, you hooked me in and wouldn't let go.
The plotline was flawless, Linds. It was incredibly well-developed, well-paced, well-thought out and seriously creative. Gus and Lee sound like quite the formidable duo. The first two paragraphs where you start outlining their personalities and behaviour in society made them out to be like the retro Paris Hilton & Nicole Richie of their day :p, society wild-childs. It was a really creative touch that you made them become sort of drifters, struggling to make money to further fund their partying. I found that incredibly refreshing and just a joy to read. In fact, I loved all the details (the Scarlet A's xD) of the story-line, it shows a lot of imagination on your part.
Then there was the climax. Woah, didn't see that one coming. Why didn't Augusta save Asley? There are many ways to interpret it although it seems meant to highlight Augusta's cowardice. Then again, it would explain why Augusta has such a hard-shell and shows such tough love to Neville, her fear of seeing shades of herself in him. Very interesting and definitely food for thought.
As for character development, you did an excellent job. I didn't think it was possible for someone to overshadow Augusta so easily but Asley is quite the spitfire. I love how you made her so full of fire and tenacity but at the same time, incredibly manipulative and controlling of Augusta. She's very realistic, she reminds me of a few people I know personally. Actually, I thought the twist would be that she was secretly in love with Augusta, the signs seemed to point to it. Then again, it might have been that she was just purely possessive.
Outstanding job on this, Linds. There were a few minor errors, missing words and such but nothing a read-through can't fixing and certainly nothing to deter from the story. 10/10!
Hope you get better soon,
~MistyAuthor's Response: MISTY!
Oh hey girl, sorry for the ridiculously late reply on this story. I've been busy with RL and writing because I'm trying to get Button Up all written so I can just post and go.
I love CAPSLOCK. It's so great. And I'm so glad you were intrigued. Oh Augusta and I go way back haha. I've been trying to do one on her FOR AGES because she is SUCH a neglected minor character. I love her to pieces and really just wanted to humanize her. A coward, cowardly, I saw this word in a book I was reading and the plot just exploded in my mind. And I had to do it. And it was perfect for the banner challenge I thought.
Gus and Lee were just fun to write about. I was hoping they would come across as believable simply because I know that making someone so rebellious can come across as cliche. And they totally had to support their partying habits. I really liked the concept of all of it really because it just reminded me of a good historical novel.
I'm so glad that you found it well developed because I was worried about the tone and how I wrote it all. I personally found it a little dry and un-poetic haha. And there's the ambiguity. There always has to be some with me these days. I like uncertain elements to a story; I think it makes it more human.
Asley was just a lot of things. She is actually based off of another character I've written half a book for but I'm blocked beyond belief on what to do with her. And I don't know if she is in love as much as possessive.
I found those phrases and thanks so much for bringing those to my attention. I'm definitely on my way to getting bettter.
Linds Report Review
That was interesting. I feel that your summary doesn't do this justice, I had no idea what I was about to read coming into this, and while that may have been your point, it does turn many readers away. I almost didn't read it because I didn't want to waste my time beginning to read something only to find out its about a ship I detest. Anyways, I think this was really good and I really enjoyed it. Its a great idea to think that Neville's grandfather was almost as awkward as himself its nice to see a possible place where he might have gotten it from. As for Augusta, I think that her being a rebel earlier in life makes complete sense, it is why she is able to be so strong for Neville and fight off a ton of death eaters on her own. I don't think it is quite as unexpected as you make it out to be. But Great Job!!
:)BaletGirAuthor's Response: I've tried to tweak the summary just slightly and I'm so glad that you decided to read AND review.
I'm really, really glad that you liked it and the concept. I tried to make it believable; I think the part that is unexpected is really the type of society and for someone to remain so affluental in that society that she spurnned.
LMW Report Review
Terms of Service
categories & genres
short story collection