This isn't a happy story at all, but I loved it. The strength Narcissa shows in keeping all of this from her husband - and the implication that she continues to do it for years into Draco's childhood - marks her as a determined woman and certainly explains how she came to be so emotionally bereft. All throughout the books it seems like Draco is the center of Narcissa's life in just a bit more than the usual way for mother and son, and I love that you picked that up and expanded on it.
I want to know when Lucius turned into such a jerk! I loved how the two of them met, and I thought it showed a... softer? side of Lucius that isn't often touched upon by writers, although I too feel that he once had the capacity to express affection. The difference in how he and Narcissa treat the house elves, though, is also quite telling, and I liked that you slipped that into the picture. :)
I also really value constructive criticism, so whenever someone writes that they are open to it, I always comb through and see if I spot anything that could use improvement. However, I didn't find anything in this story to constructively criticize! It was very well written, the characters were believable, and the emotional depth of it is impressive. Awesomely done.Author's Response: Hey! Thanks for reading and reviewing.
I am pleased you liked this not-so-happy story =) Its great you liked the way I have portrayed Narcissa, your comments are spot on. Yes, I enjoyed expanding on the motherly side of Narcissa we saw in the books.
Haha, I guess over time, a lot of men turn into jerks. They are all nice in the beginning and later just turn horrible (speaking from experience). I wanted to show a softer side of Lucius, yes, before going over to his meaner one. Aha I am glad you picked up on the treatment of house-elves, it is a detail I pride myself on.
It is such a great thing to hear that you don't find anything in this story to constructively criticise. It means a lot to me. Thanks for all your lovely words! Report Review
Well first off I would like to say you are simply amazing! I love everything of yours that I have read.
Narcissa seems so genuine. and Lucas seems as self important as ever. IMO brilliant character capture.
I love that you give insight to the start of their relationship, while reading the books I always wondered. While shes not exactly nice I've always wondered why stay with a man like him. There must have been other pure-bloods to date.
I enjoy that your story draws you in and makes you feel a certain emotion. When I read the words "another woman" I had the typical Gasp! Hes a lying dirty cheater!. that. Man!!! then realized he has always been these things, I had simply pushed it aside with the present information. So amazing. :)
Its always such a pleasure to read your stories and I cant wait for another game of tag. Happy Reading~ LadyAuthor's Response: Hi! Thanks a ton for reading and reviewing!
I am so flattered that you think I am amazing and like every work of mine, thank you!
I was a little concerned about my characterisations but your positive feedback has pleased me.
I am glad that you liked the way I portrayed their relationship too. I always wondered that too so I gave it my own spin =)
Its great to know that my story was emotional for you, and you could connect with it while reading.
Thank you so much once again! I look forward to more reviews from you via Tag =) Report Review
I think you did a fantastic job on Narcissa here. Her thoughts, especially, were really realistic. I love how you explained why she fell in love with Lucius, it's been something that I've always asked myself about when I read Lucius/Narcissa fics. Also, I love love love it when she remembers how their friendship started that day in the Hogwarts Express. Gah. I would love to see that! A kind (and caring, maybe?) Lucius is definitely a sight to see.
The transition from the warm, lovable to the cold, haughty Narcissa is really well done. I think you did her character justice! You took your time explaining everything and developed her character really well. From her happy, romantic teenage days to a husband who's cheating on her...she ad every reason to abandon their quickly falling apart marriage and yet she didn't. Not because she still love Lucius, but because she wanted her child to have a better life. Gah. She is just a wonderful mother, really.
This is really fantastic! I love it! Everything is just so perfect about it. Amazing job! :D ♥
83rd review out of 100Author's Response: Hi! Thanks a ton for reading and reviewing!
I am glad you liked this and found Narcissa's character nicely done. I was concerned about the believability so its great to know that you found her thoughts realistic. I always like to explore the how and why of Lucius/Narcissa's love relationship so I am glad you liked my 'explanation'. You're right, a kind and caring Lucius is definitely a sight to see so I am glad you enjoyed the flashback.
Its great to know that you think I did her character justice, and that the transition was well done. She is a wonderful mother, indeed, thats what we see in the books, so I just gave it my own little spin too.
I am so happy that you liked this fic so much, thank you! Report Review
Review tag here!
This is a very intense story. You've really shown how a relationship starts off so beautifully and blissfully before slowly turning bad and ending in disaster. It's quite a heartbreaking journey for Narcissa, really - and you've really shown her transition from a graceful, lively, optimistic and affectionate teenager to a happily married woman to one who is increasingly dissatisfied with the diminishing love in her marriage. And then there's her discovery of Lucius' infidelity - something which she has never even suspected, being the trusting loving wife she was. You've given Narcissa's character so much complexity and written her with such compassion.
And yet at the end, despite the tragic turn of her marriage, you've still given her redeeming moments - her strength, her desire to keep the child and nurture it and love it - despite becoming emotionally detached toward her husband and the rest of the world. It's a lovely poignant moment, and the story does end on a note of hope, despite all the grief and misery of the marriage.
I think you did a fantastic job writing Lucius and Narcissa's relationship, and a very convincing and realistic portrayal of a marriage. Your characterisation of Narcissa is quite amazing.
I've enjoyed reading this piece a lot. Great work!
-tehAuthor's Response: Hey! Thanks for reading and reviewing!
I am glad you found this intense and could feel Narcissa's journey and transition. I put in a lot of effort into writing her character so its great to know that you found her complex and written well.
I love the ending too, I am more of a sad-ending person to these kind of stories, but somehow a hopeful ending fitted with her character here as well as the theme, so I am glad you appreciate it.
I am flattered that you think I did justice to Lucius and Narcissa's relationship, their marriage, and Narcissa's characterisation.
Thank you so much! Report Review
I think you did all of the characters justice here. In the beginning, Narcissa has this bubbly optimism and radiance and then at the end she has definitely come around to the hardened determination that we see in canon. Your narrative flowed well and the dialogue was consistent with the characters and the situation. I didn't see any grammatical or spelling slips. It was really clean.
As far as constructive criticism goes, I can't see much that needs attention. I will say that after reading the whole thing and knowing where you were going, I felt like maybe it would be nice to see Narcissa's attitude about her marriage come through just a bit, something that overshadows her enthusiasm about the pregnancy that tells us that something is wrong but she's trying to push it away and just be happy in the moment. Kind of like a little hint of trouble. Then, when she makes her decision at the end, it will tie in really tight with the beginning.
Everything that you showed us about her relationship with Lucius fit in well with canon. I can totally see this as a possibility of how things were for her.
Nicely done one-shot!Author's Response: Hey! Thanks for reading and reviewing!
I am glad that you think I did all the characters justice. I wanted my readers to really able to see the change in Narcissa from the beginning to the end, so I am glad it worked for you!
Its great to hear that you found my narrative to flow well, with consistent dialogue. No grammatical or spelling slips? Phew, thats a relief xD
Thank yo for the CC. I'll think about doing that, and put it in if I do an edit :)
Glad you could see this as a possibility, and in line with canon!
Thanks! Report Review
Hmm. This was different. I liked it though. I like how even though what she really wanted was her husband to act like he used to again, that that didn't happen, and that she accepted it. Not that I'm saying it's the best life choice, but I like how even though she knows she won't be fully happy ever again, she has every intention of making the child's life the best it could possibly be. This one-shot definitely adds to what we already know about Narcissa, that her son is the most important thing in her life and that things are tense between Narcissa and Lucius (or at least I sort of always thought they were).
This was a very good story. I really like reading about Narcissa, I think she's an interesting character and there's a lot we don't know for sure about her.
I hope you had an super fun packed holiday!
xxEnigmaticEyes16Author's Response: Thank you so much once again for reading and reviewing.
I am glad you found this different yet liked it. Its true, it was definitely not the best life choice, but poor Narcissa, she felt so trapped, she does want the best for her child after all.
I wrote this along the lines of what we know of her in canon, and its nice to know that that point came across to you!
Thank you once again for your review! I am happy you liked reading this! Report Review
First off, I'd like to say that I'm really glad you decided to start up the Slytherin review tag again-I think it is a great idea for us snakes!
Anyway, onto the story...
I really liked this. All Narcissa's thoughts and feelings...you made them seem so real and i felt super sorry for Narcissa when she realised Lucius was with another woman.
I think your characterization of her was spot on, and I liked the backstory you gave us about her past. Great job!
Courtney:)Author's Response: Hi! Thanks for reading and reviewing!
I am glad you like the slytherin review tag idea, I hope it doesn't die out!
I am glad you liked this and found Narcissa's thoughts and feelings real, and that you could sympathise with her. I am flattered that you think her characterisation was spot on, and you liked the overall backstory, thank you! Report Review
Hi this is your review from the Review Tag on the forum :)
I loved this one-shot as I don't really come across many where Narcissa is portrayed realistically. You can definitly imagine now, why she turned into who she is in the Harry Potter books. How she's so devoted to Draco that she's willing to let Voldemort lose. I always wondered why she did that so it's nice to have a backstory behind it now as well.
Just one tiny thing however the bit about how she said she lost her virginity before being married sort of confused me, as I had always imagined purebloods as ultra conservative in their views on premarital sex, well for women anyway! But, I don't think that takes anything from the story it's just me being Harry Potter nerd!
Overall I found the story really good as it flowed really well and it was really believable :) I would definitly read more of this story if there was more as I find Narcissa's persepective really intriguing :)Author's Response: Hi!
Thanks for reading and reviewing. I am so happy to know that you liked this one-shot, and found the backstory of Narcissa plausible.
Hmm, well I always thought that pureblood or not, teenagers are always sort of rebellious and hormone-driven, and they wouldn't really care much about conservativeness. I wanted Lucius to be special for Narcissa, so I made him, her first :)
Thanks again for reading, and its good to know that you found this believable. Report Review
Hey there, I'm from tag.
I love Narcissa. I love the Narcissa/Lucius 'ship, and even though it's come to a sad end, I still quite like the way you've written Narcissa - haughty and warm at the same time. And Lucius as the golden boy, the ideal man.
I've got a bit of critique for you though too. Firstly:
and that had been the night she had lost her virginity
I'm... not really convinced by this. The conservative values of pureblood society would probably extend to women's sexuality too, because they'll want to know that any children she has are most definitely pureblood, and therefore Narcissa would probably wait until marriage. That may be just me, though, being all sociology-geek-y.
The Blacks are also known to support the Dark Lord and so Narcissa would probably do so too, in my opinion.
Anyway, despite that, well done with this. :)Author's Response: Hi! Thanks for reading and reviewing.
I love the Lucius/Narcissa ship too. I am glad you liked my portrayal of them.
Thanks for your critique, I appreciate your thoughtfulness. To me, Lucius seemed liked the guy who would lure girls into his bed since Hogwarts, and since Narcissa was smitten by him, I assumed that he would sleep with Narcissa as well - maybe after a little persuading and charming. And I think I am pretty sure Narcissa knew Lucius was a pure-blood.
And if you remember from my story, Narcissa wasn't against the Dark Lord. She was just neutral towards it - being sort of a 'family' person, she didn't want to get involved in the war, on neither side.
Thanks :) Report Review
Hey! I really thought I'd reviewed this before but obviously not!
I really do like this story so much which is why I've podcasted it! The flow of this story is literally just so beautiful and the fact that it's about one of the little wrote about ships, Lucius and Narcissa makes it even more special to me!
I can just imagine Narcissa acting this way about having a baby as pureblood families often had children to preserve their bloodline but this is obviously a bit of an exception as Lucius made it no secret that he didn't want children yet.
Lucius also acted in an awful way in my opinion. I don't think I've seen Lucius in any story act that way towards his wife however in this instance I thought it worked very well! Him cheating on his wife though was a little bit heartbreaking though as I felt Narcissa crumble a little bit when she found out he was in the arms of another woman, it made me almost flick back when she was 16 and her boyfriend cheated on her, it just made her seem a little bit vulnerable!
She seems so strong though towards the end, vowing to live her life for the baby Malfoy rather than live it for her love for her husband. In that I can see she feels extremely betrayed but she doesnt want to be beaten by it!
Well done!Author's Response: Hey!
Thanks a lot for reading and reviewing, and of course turning this story into a podcast! I can't wait for it to be up :)
I am glad you like the flow of this story, and that you like Lucius and Narcissa (like me)!
I am flattered that you find Lucius' behaviour in my story plausible, and that you could feel the emotions I wanted to convey through this piece.
Thank you so much for your thoughtful review! Report Review
This has been a very interesting read! Only recently I've started reading Lucius/Narcissa stories and I'm glad I got the chance to read yours.
In the beginning, considering the way you began the story, I was a little worried that you were summarising Narcissa's experiences with Lucius. Yet, after a while, when we finally came to know that Narcissa's pregnant, things began to fall into place and I understood that you were setting the scene with enough details so we can understand Narcissa's feelings and reactions.
Speaking of those... I think you've written a perfect Narcissa here. It seems as though you really know her and know what's going on in her head and how she feels. She seemed to be so in-character, and I really admire that.
I was sad to see Lucius cheat on Narcissa, especially when he knew that she was hurt the very same way once before. But I really do love these two!
This is a really nice one-shot! Great job and keep on writing!
-MannoAuthor's Response: Hey! Thanks a lot for reading and reviewing!
I am happy you liked my story overall, and glad that you realized I wasn't summarising Narcissa's experiences with Lucius. That sounds quite boring xP
Perfect Narcissa really? Aw thank you so much. I am flattered that you find her in-character.
I am glad you liked my story. Thank you! Report Review
Another amazing story. you really know her. You really REALLY know her. Amazing.
Again, I didn't see any mistakes except one. You've said "Since one year" which should be "For one year" but hey, the rest was impeccable. I love the beginning and the ending. You've once again taken so little and done a great lot. Amazing.
I really can see her becoming like this. Lucius seems the type. *Kicks him* The tyke. He should learn a lesson.
See what you've done to me? You've got me addicted ;) So if a Lucius plot bunny comes running, it's all your fault.
I love this. You're a terrific author.
*Hugs*Author's Response: Aw thank you once again for your sweet review. I am glad you think my story is amazing :)
Oh, I will look into that mistake and correct it. Thanks for pointing it out! I am happy you liked the beginning and ending too. Haha Lucius sure is the type.
Haha, Lucius plot bunnies rock xP good luck!
and thank you so much for your compliments, thanks a lot. *hug* Report Review
Hi, this is HappyMollyWeasley here with your review.
I've never read a Narcissa story before, but I think she is an interesting character, so this was a good opportunity to try this. I like how you describe Narcissa as a feeling, thinking and warm person. She doesn't have to be a cold hearted hard woman as she is sometimes pictuered. I love the scene where she is crying onto Lucius's shoulder. How sweet and adorable!
I would have liked to get a little more details about how their friendship led to love. Maybe a few flashbacks, just to see how Lucius and Narcissa interacted?
Oh, poor Narcissa, to see how her husband changes in front of her eyes, and to hope that her unborn child would be the cure to this... And then to find out that he has another woman! And to find out that he was a Death Eater in the same time. What a shock to have all this on the same day!
Over all I like this story, but the pace is a little bit on the fast side, I think. You have lots of good ideas, enough to make this one-shot to a chaptered story if you wanted to. Either that, or "kill your darlings" and focus only on a few of the themes here. There are a lot to choose from: Jealousy, love, expecting a baby, the dullness of the marriage, the betrayal...
The ending was good. This could explain quite a lot about Draco too, I think! :-)Author's Response: Hey!
First of all thank you for your kind words :) I am glad that you liked the way I described Narcissa, especially since it was a new territory for you. The crying on the shoulder is perhaps a little cliche but I love that scene too xD
That is a good suggestion, I might include some flashbacks when I edit the story :)
I know right, it was so heartbreaking, what Narcissa experienced.
Hmm I agree the story is a little fast paced, but I am usually a writer who finds trouble writing one idea per chapter, I prefer to put in my ideas in a mix together :) I will see though about turning this into a chaptered story.
Thanks a lot for reading & reviewing! Glad you liked the ending too!
I thought this was a really compelling vision of Narcissa's relationship with her husband. It was completely consistent with everything we know about them from the books and it fills in an important gap in their back story that explains a lot of both of their behavior, as well as Draco's relationship with the two of them.
I really liked the way that you portrayed Narcissa before Lucius brought her whole world crumbling down. She seemed like a perfect youngest child, and she had a lot of her middle sister's happiness in her.
Your portrayal of Lucius was simply spot-on. He seemed to befriend Narcissa at a difficult moment in her life, but even then you made him feel just a bit distant. In her mind their friendship grew and sprouted into romance, but I feel fairly sure that Lucius simply kept her close by while he enjoyed the company of other girls, knowing that she was his for the taking. In a sense, he collected her. And after they were married, he resumed his former life as thought nothing had changed. The sense of entitlement and the lack of morals are both perfectly in character.
And lastly comes her decision to go on being Mrs. Narcissa Malfoy solely for the sake of her unborn child. It was perfectly in character, and showed the interesting mix of strength and weakness that would later compel her to submit to the Dark Lord yet defy him at the most critical moment in the entire series. Very well done.
The only thing I saw that read oddly to me was the timeline. Lucius was supposedly a friend of Bellatrix's, yet he befriended Narcissa in her sixth year. Bellatrix would have to be at least two years older than Narcissa (Andromeda was the middle daughter), so it just seemed a tad off that Lucius would be her friend yet only be one year ahead of Narcissa. It's not insurmountable, just a bit strange.
Overall, your writing was splendid. Everything flowed nicely and there were no distracting typos or grammar problems. This was a very enjoyable look at the lives of the Malfoy's.Author's Response: Hey there!
I am glad you liked this story :) And that you found it consistent with canon!
I am also happy to know that you found my portrayal of Narcissa as real and well-crafted, and that you think Lucius as well as Narcissa were very much in-character.
As for the timeline, well I didn't exactly check the canon facts for that, so I have now provided an Author's note that says that their ages/timeline is not canon compliant. I hope that's okay :)
I am flattered by your wonderful review, and I am glad you enjoyed the story! Thank you so much for reading and reviewing! Report Review
Hi there! VioletBlade here from the forums with your long, long, long overdue review. No doubt you’d given up on me, and you’d be in the right to do so, but I just looked at my review thread randomly and realized how many people I was letting down so I decided to get to them all.
So, to start off, I thought this was a very interesting piece and definitely not the type of thing I usually read, but it was actually very interesting! I think Narcissa is one of those characters in the book that really was not represented enough, in my opinion so I'm glad you decided to write something from her POV.
Language: Though you could possibly have been a little more descriptive in the way you wrote this story to add some spark to it, the overall language was good and moved the story along just fine!
Characterization: It was a very different, shocking insight into a well-known character in the HP series, and I liked how you did it. Some of the things I had a problem with were the "'Cause", "Okay", and the way she was shocked at the fact that her husband was a Death Eater. I think, coming from the Black family and being the sister of Bellatrix, that it would have been a very big oversight for her not to have seen what was going on. However, you did get me with the look into her past and the problems she's had with guys cheating on her. It honestly broke my heart a little for her. But I admire the way you painted her, that she would sacrifice her own happiness in her marriage to make sure her son had the very best life he could possibly have.
Grammar: Nothing really stood out to me much in this department, except possibly the over-usage of italics. I think it took more away from the story than added to it, and usually italics are used to make a strong point. Other than that, everything look okay to me! :)
Plot: Again, it was a different take into a character that I think deserved more of an insight into her life. It was a nice, short piece that got me thinking about the way she became the woman she was-- even leading up to the fateful moment where she decides not to betray Harry Potter because of the love she has for her son. That is what she lives for.Author's Response: Hey! First off, thanks a lot for taking the time to read & review :)
Narcissa is one of my favorite characters and that's why I decided to write her, I like to experiment with her, and I'm glad it worked :)
I am happy to hear that the language was good. If I do an edit, I'll make it a point to improve on my description :)
Well, about her being shocked at the DE thing, I don't think the fact that he was a death eater shocked/hurt her that much. In my opinion, what I wanted to portray was, the fact that Lucius hid the fact that he'd become a DE from her. Yeah I know, the cheating breaks my heart too. I am glad you like the way I painted her.
Hmm I'll look into what I can do about the italics. Thanks for pointing it out :D
Good to know you found the plot plausible!
I am so thankful for your comments. They really make me feel good. Thank you so much! Report Review
This was a very intersting insight into Narcissa's personaity and family life. Knowing what we know about Lucius being a death eater and everything, it definetely makes you wonder if Narcissa really loved him, or if she just married him for his money/ blood status. You did a good job of showing how she actually was in love with him, but at the same time, she seemed to be in denial about certain aspects of his personality until she finally caught him red handed.
Is Narcissa your favorite character? Because you are very adept at writing her. Her emotions and the issues she deals with were presented very well in a believable manner. We could totally sympathize with how she was so dissapointed that Lucius was cheating, but at the same time, she wanted to raise Draco in a comfortable and stable envoronment, and wouldn't do anything to upset that.
The potrayl of Lucius was spot on as well. We can see the nasty, controling personality that we see in the books, but we can also see the charms that would hav attracted Narcissa in the first place. that's a difficult balance to achieve, so good job on that.Author's Response: Hey! Thank you so much for the wonderful review!
I am happy to know that you found this interesting, and Narcissa's personality well-portrayed.
Hehe yes Narcissa is my favorite character :) And it flatters me to know that you think I'm adept at writing her. It means a lot to me, thank you! I am glad you could sympathize with her and understand the situation, as that was what I'd been aiming for.
Lucius was a little hard for me to write, but it's nice to know you found his personality balanced and believable.
This review put a nice smile on my face :) Thanks a lot once again for reading & reviewing! Report Review
Hey, me again!
Well...wow. I loved this! I've been working on a Narcissa/Lucius short story for a challenge, so this was really good to read right now--it got me in the mood to write again. :]
I really love your portrayal of Narcissa. Oh my gosh, it's perfect. She's so strong, even when she has every right to break down. And FREAKING LUCIUS! WHAT DOES HE THINK HE'S DOING? UGH.
I really loved the plot and how Narcissa decided she would keep pushing forward to keep life good for her baby. That's so sweet. It's just...aww. It's really nice.
I was really sad to see that Lucius hurt her so much though. The emotions you portrayed were perfect--so well done. I loved it.
Completely awesome story. Amazingly written. I enjoyed it so much. Great job. :D
--EmilyAuthor's Response: Heyyy :D
Thanks a ton!!! Your review totally made me smile :) Thanks so much!! I am really thrilled that you found it so "perfect". thank you! I am glad I was able to portray Narcissa aptly and the plot and emotions and everything felt good to you :)
Thank you so much for the flattering review!! kudos! Report Review
I'm back! (Sorry - I meant to get these done quicker than I have been. NaNo is eating my time.)
So! I thought that this was a really great one-shot. The progression was fantastic - you put in just the right memories to really draw me into their relationship, and I really felt for Narcissa when her optimism and hopes were shattered. I can definitely see how this would make her the ice queen we saw in the books.
In some ways, it felt like Lucius's change wasn't well explained, but after I sat here and thought about it for a bit, I decided that I liked that, because it really reflects the way life often works. It's often difficult to understand why people change, especially from the point of view of the person who was cheated on, so the slight confusion and discomfort actually worked, at least for me.
You did an amazing job with this. :)Author's Response: Hey! No problem, NaNo can be time-consuming of course xD
I am flattered that you found this so good. I am glad the memories && emotions && stuff all came off realistically and nicely to you.
I actually intended to keep it that way, because I was writing it from Narcissa's point of view, so I wanted the confusion to be there, as to how & why Lucius changed so suddenly. As you said, that's the way life works, you often don't realize how people change. I am glad it worked for you :)
Thank you so much for reading && reviewing. I am really happy that you liked this :)
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amazing story . i enjoyed it completely.
i was thinking that cissy will find malfoy with dark lord but i was totally surprised when it turns up to be a woman. it can be a possible reason that they have only one child! ( draco)
10/10Author's Response: Hey!! I am so glad you liked this!! I know what people would generally think, that's why I wanted to bring a twist :)
Thank you so much for reading && reviewing, happy you liked this!!
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Agnes here with your review :)!
Ohh, I just love it when people explore the history between Narcissa and Lucius and how they came to be a couple! I have to say I really, really like the way you've portrayed their relationship here. And it was so sweet until, well...until Lucius shoved poor Narcissa off of his lap. For some reason I found that amusing and quite in-character--the way you wrote it just seems very much like something he would do. And--oh. Ohhh. Narcissa, the poor dear! Seeing her husband in the arms of another woman--I just can't explain how heartbroken I was when I read that line.
I also think it's intriguing how you made Narcissa (willingly?) oblivious to the fact that Lucius became a Death Eater, only to have her find out on pure accident. I'd always thought he would share that kind of information with her--but I think I like the way you've kept it hidden from her a lot more, actually.
Overall, I find this to be an extremely believable scenario for Narcissa's shift in behavior. Very realistic, I think.
One thing I noticed, though, is that at times you emphasize certain words such as 'perfect' in double quotation marks while at other times in single quotation marks. I'm not sure if that was intentional, but you may want to check that over if it's not. It sort of distracted me while reading. But if that was intentional, feel free to ignore me!Author's Response: Hi!
Thank you for reading and making me smile with such a sweet review!!
I am glad you found my 'exploration' of the couple realistic and liked the portrayal. It is also very heartwarming to know I got the emotions across and that you found it all likeable, realistic and intriguing. Thanks a lot!!
And about the quotation marks - that is intentional. For more emphasis, it is double and for less it is single =)
Thanks a lot once again for your valuable comments!
~AD Report Review
I have to say I was immediately attracted to this story because it was written from Narcissa's point of view. I'm going through a Narcissa phase for some reason and am completely fascinated by her backstory and perspective. So, first things first, thanks for doing something out of the ordinary--you (inadvertently) indulged my current obsession!
Secondly--I have to say that I really enjoyed this little snapshot into her married life; and, though I would never have pegged Lucius to be one to cheat on Narcissa, I thought your characterizations were relatively spot on. Especially, in keeping with the theme of my review, with regards to Narcissa.
Her reaction to Lucius's secrets whether it was the cheating or the dark mark--I think was just right. That she would put family first, her child first is a really important thread that you illustrated really well.
The interesting thing I've always felt about Narcissa is her loyalty to her family comes first. That is what defines her more than any allegiance to the Dark Arts and that in the end is what makes her redeemable. I feel like you really brought that out.
So, moral of that ramble, if its understandable haha--really nice job! I enjoyed the read! I'd love to see a longer fic in Narcissa PoV at some point!Author's Response: Hi!! Well I don't want to sound pompous but I think I do write narcissa fairly well - and it is only because I find her character so interesting and explore-able. She is one of my favorite characters, and I love it when I meet people who share my interest for her (even if it is just a phase). =D
Anyway let me come back to the point, thank you so much for reading and reviewing! I am really glad that you found this little piece good enough - with the characterizations and plot and the reality of the thing.
I am flattered that you found this so good. Thank you once again for making me smile with your encouraging review!
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Hi there! It's me off the forums with your (belated) review :)
I really loved the chance to have an insight into Narcissa Malfoy's marriage. You characterised Narcissa really well, and I love how you started it off with her all happy and remembering her meeting of Lucius. It really added depth to her character before we found out what the problem was, and it made her a lot more real and easy to access.
I also love how we could see Lucius becoming more cold and distant before us, thanks to Narcissa's memories then her explanations and when he eventually came in. The way you made Cissy so warm to him at first, then realise exactly what was going on, was a really clever view on why she's like she is later on. Her shock was really brilliant, but I have a new respect for her since she decided to keep on living for her baby and ignore whatever Lucius is doing - I loved that.
Your descriptions of Narcissa and her memories were all really well done. You had careless and happy manner conveyed to us, before her upset and hurt and later resolve and anger showed. I loved how she resolved to be strong at the end, and was so brave in that way.
It was great to see exactly what an atmosphere Draco would have grown into! I really loved it, and hearing Narcissa's voice before she who she was later on. Great job!
~TGKAuthor's Response: Hello there!
Yay, thank you so much for such an awesome review!
I am so glad you liked it overall and gave details on what all you found noteworthy! I really appreciate it.
I am so happy you think I captured it all well.
Thank you once again for reading, reviewing and hitting on so many details!
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Hi! This was amazing! I enjoyed it throughout the whole time I read it. You have some serious writing skills, the choice of vocabulary is amazing and it just flows throughout the whole piece. This just seemed so canon, like it was a ripped page from JKR novels. Your grammar is good and I didn't pick up any errors. In all, a really good, well written one shot.
- SexyDoorFramesAuthor's Response: Hi SDF!
Thank you so much for reading and the amazing review! I am so flattered! Really I can never be as good as JKR but I'm glad you found this a nice piece. Thanks once again! Report Review
There's really not much to say, except that this was extremely beautiful. It was something I could see happening in canon so completely, which is something I love in stories. I wish it was more than just a one-shot.Author's Response: Hi!!! wow this made my day!! thanks so much for reading and leaving such a sweet review!! I am happy that it seemed canon and was beautiful! I wish it were more than a one-shot too but I'm not sure if I would be able to handle it then =D
Thanks again! Report Review
Hey this is shaheen from the forums.I am here with your review as requested. So to start from I don't believe that this story was too clichéd or too OOC as you have put it. You'll not believe that this is the first fan-fic I am reading about lucius/narcissa but don't worry it was DEFINITELY worth it .Author's Response: Thank you so much for reading and reviewing. I am glad you found it 'worth it'. =) Report Review
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