One little grammar thing I noticed before I get to "real" stuff: In the bit where you say they had been searching Malfoy Manor for Hermione's wand, "she, Ron and Harry" should be "her, Ron, and Harry."
So you asked if the explanation of why Hermione chose to keep Bellatrix's wand in this story is believable. I think I have to say yes, because an awful lot can be explained with wand lore. What little we know of it in canon appears to indicate that it is rather complex, which also makes it quite adaptable for fanfic writers. This idea of the wand choosing the wizard/witch is a powerful one and can be used to explain a lot (heck, JKR used it to contort an interesting ending out of her series).
We know that Bellatrix Lestrange must have been a powerful and formidable witch. I think it is an interesting parallel you have created here with Harry struggling with his similarities to Tom Riddle--many of which came about because of the Horcrux, but still. Anyway, the point of all this rambling is to say that, yes, I think you've concocted a well-enough-plausible reason, especially given the whole "wand chooses" thing.
I personally don't like the idea of Hermione keeping the wand, but I think also that it was important for Hermione to realize she is different, just like it was important for Harry. In this story, the wand provided that vehicle.
Besides, who doesn't like a good Molly Weasley cameo? :PAuthor's Response: Alo!
Thanks so much for the great review. Sorry I didn't get back to you sooner, but I was out of town when you posted this.
Grammar - grrr! Thanks for catching that.
I'm pleased you think it works. And, I think you're right that wand lore gives us a lot of running room, but I was always concerned that I'd run a bit far - Hermione still having Bella's wand is key to the entire Crusadiverse and Hermione's research regarding it becomes crucial in another short story "The Tipping Point" that occurs just two weeks before Crusade in which I explain how Yaxley managed to get Riddle's old wand. So, in short, a lot is riding on this chapter/one shot.
I never noticed the Harry/Voldy Hermione/Bella parallel until you pointed it out - but, in retrospect, it seems obvious - I must have done that subconsciously (or unconsciously;)
And, yes, a Molly Weasley Cameo is never a bad thing.
Thanks again, great to hear from you
Eldy: Just amazing! Again the dialogue was perfection and the humor had your patented style. Love the way you're weaving through this plot line. It's contains so many possibilities for variation that when the final duels do result, I'm sure the story will have outstanding twists and a thrilling climax.
Here are my thoughts: Yaxley knows that his Voldy wand will lock up with Harry's so he must be on the same quest to figure out a solution. A second identical wand is brilliant but what if Yaxley decided to do what his master did and created a Horcrux as a safety net in case Harry came up with a brilliant ploy to defeat him? Which he must consider that Harry will find a solution. Even if Harry did defeat his wand, Yaxley would survive to strike back or escape. Do I make any sense? This outcome could take Harry by surprise, don't you think? Harry is intent on defeating the wand not necessarily the opponent at this point. Maybe Yaxley is luring Harry into thinking that if can break the lock he has Yaxley when in essence he does not. Just a thought. As always, Well Done you magnificent pagan god! PWAuthor's Response: Thanks again! Flattered by all the praise.
Your points on Yaxley's strategizing make infinite sense, but keep in mind, this tale's a prequel to Children's Crusade. The big duel between Yaxley and Harry had already been written (Chapter 3 of Children't Crusade - the Battle of Diagon Alley). Just the same, these are all really excellent ideas.
Eldy Report Review
Eldy: Wow! Nice job of having Harry flirting on the precipice of the dark side. Its a fine line between good and evil and thank God Harry has Ginny there to remind him which is which. This plot is very creative and I like the tense well-written dialogue between Zack and Harry. I also like the way the people who are close to Harry or have worked with him for a while know him so well and don't have any fear in challenging him for all the right reasons. Can't wait for the next chapter. Very well done! PWAuthor's Response: PW! Thanks!
This story is really the bridge between the other Crusadiverse tales and Crusade itself. Although Harry's fear and temper are showcased a bit in Battle of the Pitch, I really needed something to underscore those points in a proper lead-in for what happens in Crusade. I also needed to address a number of things, back-story wise, that I hadn't until now. But, most importantly, I needed to show his tendency to go to the dark side and how Ginny is the anchor that prevents that.
Thanks again and Merry Christmas!
Eldy Report Review
Eldy: So good! You have such a way with narrating battle scenes and again the dialogue between Ron and Harry is funny but keeps the intensity of their plight riveting. Awesome job! Seamus's tongue in cheek comments were hilarious. Loving every minute of this story. Very well done. PWAuthor's Response: Thanks again!
I got myself in a bit of a pickle with this story. I violated my cardinal rule: never start posting till the story is done. I wrote chapter 1 and posted before I'd written anything else. It was really difficult to make the segment of the battle in chapter 1 jive with the full scene in Chapter 3. I'm glad you think it worked.
Ron and Harry's dialogue was a real blast to write. Their back-and-forth after McG tells them to be careful in the last chapter, the whole bit with Seamus trying to apparate away and especially the jibes R/H trade during the fight were all great fun.
It really is a joy getting these great reviews from you.
Eldy Report Review
Eldy! Amazing story. Your stories flow so flawlessly and the dialogue so crisp. Of course you have theelderwand trademark humor matched by the intriguing way you flow from one conversation to the other between H/G and R/H. I'm supposed to be working right now but it's been so long since I've been able to read your stories I can't tear myself away. Good thing I own the company. Oh well, I'll yell at myself later. Moving on to read the next story and I'll review more later. As always, you are an incredibly gifted writer. Well done and Merry Christmas! PWAuthor's Response: Work? Humbug!!
Hey, PW! Merry Christmas to you as well. Great to hear from you. This tale is exceptionally light-hearted (for the Crusadiverse at least), but I think (hope) you'll find it ties in nicely once you read "Tipping Point." That said, I simply had to write a story with this title; compelled, actually. And I knew it would be a comedy, with our hapless heroes getting themselves in deep, as usual. Other than that, I didn't know much till I started writing. Really, really glad you liked it.
Btw, I've written a sequel to Lumos Kedavra (Harry v. the chirstmas lights). Its called "The Communicable Nature of Weasleyishness," as Chapter 1 of the Gryffindor Christmas Collaboration: A Very Gryffie Holiday - The Sequel! Its in my favorites. I won't be able to respond to any reviews over there, since its a collab, but I think (hope, once again) that you'll get a kick out of it.
Best to you and yours during the holiday season.
Eldy Report Review
Back again to try and catch up on another review I owe you for wonderful stories! At this rate, I might run out of things from you to read by New Years, LOL!
Okay, review now:
Loved the age old Weasley dilema of food or sleep. I think I must be a Weasley, hehehehe. Although, since sleep usually wins for me, maybe not.
Harry, dear, if Ginny is doing the laundry once in a while, then she IS inspecting your underwear. Just thought I should let you know that...
Counting broomsticks. hehehehe Watch out, when she starts naming the Egyptian Dynasties - backwards - you might want to have a plan B.
Bryce Galloway! Yeah! He always makes me laugh! And if figures he's be a "buisness associate" of George's. *shakes head* Snickering at the Peeves and Mundugus comment.
You know, I still not sure how, with half of Wizarding britian gaining entrance to the caslte by it on the night of the battle, that passageway is still a secret...
Meanwhile, across town, Ron is getting the same from Hermione. Do they PLAN these things? "Tweet" in the morning to make sure they both have their lectures planned out?
Hm.Leaky Takeout. I'm not sure that sounds appetizing.
And Ron counts cholate frogs, huh? Must be a Weasley thing. You should tell him to try sheep. I hear the Serta Sheep have been out of work a lot lately. They'd probably give him a pretty good deal.
(I know I'm giving a sort of odd review this time, but I do need you to know how wonderful I think this writing is...fitting the two scenes together to nicely, and showing they are WAY more alike than they would probably like to admit. )
Ah Bill. Always like it when he turns up in your stories, even if only in reference.
Hehehehe, and when do your plans ever work? (Loved that little bit in the last movie, btw, when they mentioned that about their plans.)
George! *big grin* Always glad when he shows up! (Only thing better would be both of them.Silly Verse Meld is calling you, can't you hear it? Like a gentle twoxfour upside the head.)
Classic McGonagall! And loved how Ron was instantly back in student mode. hehehehe
Well, Ron, I'm sure Luna isn't too worried about you two, if that would help. So at least ONE witch in the country isn't planning your funerals. Hehehehehe
Good cop, bad cop - LOL. You've been letting Ron and Harry watch your stash of Dragnet, haven't you. Are you sure that's wise?
I wonder if they sell extensions for Invisibility Cloaks for when you get too tall. Would be helpful I'm sure.
Aw, shucks. You didn't have to give me a shout out! Thanks though.
Another great chapter! Your characters are so good and spot on that I forget I'm reading and feel like I'm there.
Amazing!Author's Response: Ok. This review totally cracked me up! Farmgirl, stay away from the butterbeer when you're reviewing! ROFL!
The fact you're carefree with this review just shows me how much fun you're having with the story, and that's really a great thing!
Really glad you liked all the little stuff I threw in here, McG's tardiness comment, Bryce coming back. Your Luna Comment was awesome! Egyptian Dynasties backwards? I may have to use that in my next fic!
This was just a blast to read.
And, of COURSE you deserve that shout out. Duh!
Thanks sis! Really enjoying getting these reviews from you
Eldy Report Review
I've decided that re-reading your stuff is more fun than reading it the first time! And yes, I'm finally getting you another one of those reviews that I owe you. Can you believe it? Now, unlike the last one, I really have read this story before, and I loved it then. Think I love it even more now.
I was sitting here as I was reading, marveling at your creativity. You always manage to write the same characters, in the same "verse" but each story is incredibly different. And I don't just mean the plot. You've had a story with alternate realities. You have stories with buddy-cop al la the wizarding world plots. You've AK'ed Christmas lights. You've had Harry converse with Death. One story had the last sentence of one section be concluded in the next. And now this one, jumping around in the story. I love it. You really are a masterful writer!
And this reminded me of the Princess Bride - like we are getting the story read to us, and skipping around (only not skipping the kissing parts, I'm betting, LOL.) Love it.
Harry and Ron are just so funny. They are so busted, and they know it, and yet they still try... hehehehehe. Hermione is going to implant muggle tracking devises in them before you finish Crusadeverse, mark my words! Or kill them. Whichever comes first.
Hope that building in Hogsmeade had good insurance...and worried about Seamus.
Wonderful writing, as always! Great way to spend some of my evening re-reading this!Author's Response: So psyched to get a review from you for this story! Thanks so much. And WAY too much praise for my writing here! But I'll be more than happy to bask in it ;)
I like chopping stories up starting in the middle, or the end and jumping to the beginning. And I just couldn't help but throw in Ginny's line "I hate when you start stories in the middle." And Hermione's "Start at the beginning! Like normal people!" Just couldn't help myself.
Princess Bride! Loved that movie - flattered by the comparison too. And, no, we don't skip the kissing. LOL!
Yep, Harry and Ron are SOOO busted; but, you'll recall that Ron manages to get them off the hook.
Muggle tracking device? Hmmm...
Thanks so much for the great review!
Eldy Report Review
So, I have a confession to make. I'm very ashamed of this confession, but it needs to be said - I hadn't ever read this tale until tonight. *Hangs head* I'm SO sorry bro, but I just got so bogged down and while I tried really hard to keep up with the wonderful tales you were spinning out, somehow this one slipped through the cracks!! When you asked me while beta-ing if that last part of chapter 10, with Mr. Weasley and Harry, was inspired by this story, I felt too bad to tell you I hadn't had time to read it yet. (And now you probably hate me...but if you don't completly despise me, I will continue with a review now.)
Wow. What a story! I think I remember asking you once why Hermione kept the wand, and you said you didn't know yet. I'm SO glad you figured it out as this as such a wonderful, heat-wrenching and yet heart-warming story! I loved every bit of it. And it was SO much fun to read Eldy stories again!
Some of my favorites:
Molly feeling like Bellatrix was still hurting her children from beyond the grave, and wanting to dig her up and kill her again - VERY powerful moment! Took my breath away.
The cup of tea - so English, hehehehe. The world is ending, but let's have tea and it will be better. LOVED it!
For some reason the mention of Arthur taking Ginny to see the game for her 17th birthday just hit me, reminding me again of how young they all really are. Kids. Just kids! Like the ones I teach everyday. I know these are fictional characters, and yet I still can't help looking at the faces of my juniors and seniors sometimes and thinking of them out having to save the world. Puts things into perspective sometimes.
Fred - *sniffles loudly* Just.just.you know.
I LOVED the way you had Molly draw out what was really bothering Hermione. Mentioning Ollivanders, working her through admiting why she hadn't got a new wand yet, to her admitting she was worried she was like Bellatrix. BRILLIANT! You're ability to tie in a plot and make everything fit so naturally amazes me! You are truly a great writer!
The thought of Hermione raising Weasleys someday made me smile. :)
Bro, you're the best! I mean that! No one can write like you, spill emotion and action and love and family and politics onto the page and have them live like you do! Thanks so much for sharing. And for putting up with an unorganized, scatterbrained, tardy and always behind little sister.
100/10Author's Response: Farmgirl!! I'm so happy you got to read this. Absolutely no worries that you didn't get to it till now. Is there anyone out here in Potterdom who knows how hard things have been for you better than me? No apologies necessary!
It took A LONG time to figure out why Hermione kept the wand. Then I remembered what she said to Ron in Crusade about it: "It's my wand now, Ronald. I keep it as a reminder and a warning and don't change the subject!"
Then it hit me that Hermione's thinking in this regard had to come from somewhere. Then I remembered that I'd built in a recurring nightmare for Hermione in "Battle of the Pitch," that involved Greyback and it occurred to me, what would happen to Hr if she had to suffer through this nightmare without Ron there to comfort her? I got the searing image of Molly holding her and soothing her. The rest fell into place.
The line about Molly digging Bella up and killing her all over again was especially for you! Really glad you liked it!
They ARE young - but they've aged so much. War does that, turns kids into the elderly. I've tried to catch that in all my tales.
I really am floored by all the praise here. I can't thank you enough. You're the best!
P.S. I tweaked Crusade just a bit with the scene when Ron finally asks about Hermione keeping the wand. Might be worth re reading chapter 2 of Crusade after you read Adventures of Reckless Git and Danger Ponce and Tipping Point, again.
Ok, I just had to let you know how funny I found this chapter. 10 mintuts latter and I am still cracking up at Ron and Harry Playing with there new toys. Then right after I had that thought, to have Hermione thinking it as she is putting him back together, was just about as funny as it could get. Ha, ha, ha.
Loving it keep up the good work and I hope that you will be posting more stories soon.
LaineAuthor's Response: Boys and there toys...well, if I just got a new wand, I figured I'd do the same thing they did. LOL!
Really glad you liked this Laine! Tipping Point is presently my favorite of the series so its great to hear it praised.
I've kind of been buried in real life but I hope to start writing the next Crusade tale this winter. Again, great to hear from you and thanks for this great review.
Eldy Report Review
Wow. Just wow. That's all I can say. :)Author's Response: Thanks so much! There's more where that came from. The timeline included in the Author's Note at the end of the tale will walk you thru the Crusadiverse. Thanks for reading!
Eldy Report Review
This reminds me of that time I was hanging out with a bunch of guy friends in high school and they decided to put firecrackers in pieces of fruit to see what happened... Not that blowing up produce isn't fun and all.
"You should see the other guy."
Haha. That was well-placed!
Alright. Since I'm not a technical person, I have to ask: if the wand-locking thing is dependent on two identical wands against each other, and the Death Eaters have been reproducing Auror wands, and wands need to somehow bond with their wielder... I don't even know if I got that part right... anyhow, assuming that I did, then does that mean that there are a bunch of Death Eaters out there wielding/swapping wands depending on which Aurors they are dealing with? And does that also mean that perhaps the Death Eaters with these reproduced wands are maybe having trouble with the wands, since they may or may not be getting enough practice with them?
Or did I get that all wrong? Maybe I should go re-read Children's Crusade...
Curiously curious, is all.
Entertained, as always!
pixileanin (Gryffindor)Author's Response: Ron's one-liners are some of my favorite things. Glad you liked that!
The wand problem. Hmmm. Well, I assume the Death Eaters are doing the exact same thing that Harry has done. Once they found out the cores of the Aurors' wands, they had twin wands made and then, through trial and error, found out who among them were compatible with those wands. They wouldn't want to risk trading wands around and not having them work for the wielder that well.
After that, the DE's, whenever they would run into Aurors, would try to pair off with the Auror whose wand they twinned. Now, this isn't perfect. There's no gaurantee that the DE's knew which Aurors they would be running into before a fight. But, the odds are in their favor that at least one of the DE's would have a wand that matched that of one of the Aurors they encountered. That's why this passage was in the tale:
"nearly every recent encounter with the Death Eaters seemed to result in at least one Auror's wand locking with a dark wizard's"
So it doesn't happen all the time, but it happens often enough that Harry and Co. knew they had a real problem on their hands. And since the DE's out number the Aurors, this gives the DEs a bit of an edge during a mass duel.
So, I hope that clears this up. These answers can't be found in Crusade, as I never addressed it there, which is why I had to write Tipping Point. Sorry if I confused you!
But really glad you enjoyed it!
Eldy Report Review
"And you want to try it out on me, with a wand that a sleep-deprived nutter just made?"
Well, yes of course. That's why he's Reckless Git after all, right? But not before breakfast. *shakes head* It would be more dangerous on an empty stomach, guys. Where's your sense of adventure??
I loved the Molly moment you threw in at the end there too. You seem to balance the adventure with the human side of things really well. A veritable cornucopia of issues all jumbled up.
pixileanin (Gryffidor)Author's Response: Do it on an empty stomach? ROFL. The Molly moment was one of my favorites. Glad you liked it!
I'm also glad you liked the balance. That can be tricky, none moreso than with this tale, because I was trying to squeeze a lot in here.
Eldy Report Review
So now you're doing the mystery of the locking wands? that's pretty cool. There are so many magical things in JKR's world that could be explored further, and this tidbit is quite fascinating. It's always interesting to read little (or not so little) expansions of the technical aspects of how magic works in the HPverse. (cringing at that last sentence, but I let it stand.)
Your opening, with Hermione and her genuine concern for Harry's mental state really prepared me for where you were going... Azkaban, to be exact. But I have to say, we readers keep popping into their world at the most inopportune times. You might want to ask Ron to consider putting a sock on the door or something...
pixileanin (Gryffindor)Author's Response: This story is really the key to Crusade. The locked wands, dual wand dueling and Harry's fatigue (for lack of a better word) I thought needed to be addressed more thoroughly to establish the last bits before Crusade. I'm glad you liked it!
Yes, we really should be more careful as to when we drop in on our heroes, shouldn't we?
Eldy Report Review
I love your Seamus. I guess it's because I don't get to see much of him outside of Hogwarts these days. We don't see much of him around these parts either. Good times, those.
Ahem. Anyway, it really is a wonder that these two aren't permanently pear-shaped by the way you write things. Always getting into trouble, always getting yelled at, always blaming each other. That's my favorite part, by the way. Oh, and the brilliant plan that made so much sense at the time. That's what you get when you back Harry and Ron into a corner. But I suppose you did that on purpose. This was another extremely entertaining mis-adventure!
pixileanin (Gryffindor)Author's Response: Mis adventure. How accurate is that! I should've called it the Misadventures of Reckless Git and Danger Ponce. Hmmm...maybe that'll be the sequel.
Seamus. I like him; a bloke who always blows things up in class. What's not to like. LOL!
This was almost too much comedy for the Crusadiverse. I almost pulled it out and put it in my "Silliverse" where "Only Gordon Can Save Us Now" and "Lumos Kedavra!" take place. But, there were some unanswered questions from Crusade and Pitch that needed to be addressed, so I kept it here.
"It was Harry's fault!'' is my favorite line in the story. So psyched you liked that. I love writing Ron and harry this way. It's great fun.
I'm just really glad you enjoyed it! thank you!
Eldy Report Review
The title of this makes me laugh already. Silly boys! This was so much fun to read.
I love how Ginny has to start them over from the beginning, “where normal people start a story”. But I understand. Sometimes, it’s just not exciting enough and you have to mix it up a bit. ;)
pixileanin (Gryffindor)Author's Response: You're the first person to comment on that line "where normal people start a story."
Since I ALWAYS start somewhere other than the begining I thought it was time to poke some fun at...well...me. LOL!
The title. Ya know, I started this story with the title and NOTHING else. I knew it would be a comedy, but that was it. Glad I got you laughing!
I don't know why I like this so much, but I do. I really really like it.
Okay, I was teasing. I know exactly why I like it. It pieces together another wonderful moment for the Weasleys and in particular, Molly. The way you write Molly is just so warm and snuggly. And wise. I wish she were my mom too. She makes everything better!
It's no doubt that Hermione would have nightmares about that nasty witch anyway, but that she had Bellatrix's wand and was using it daily would make it so much worse. It would creep most sane people out, I suppose, that a thing used for such malice was in their hands.
You have such crazy-good flow with this. The dialogue reads effortlessly and the rise and fall of the narrative is so smooth. It is a pleasure to read.
pixileanin (Gryffindor)Author's Response: Pix!! I'm so pleased you found this tale!
Molly...I just love her to death. I never really appreciated her until she whipped up on Bella, then I rethought her whole character and I was like "Omg, what have I missed!" She's the best.
There's a reason this is the first of the stories in this compilation. Hermione keeping Bella's wand was a HUGE plot point that was taken too much for granted in Crusade and I always wanted to justify it. The fact that Hermione said she hated it in DH simply had to be dealt with.
I'm reallypleased you liked this tale.
Eldy Report Review
Eldy: The ending between Molly and Harry was precious. You've been taking notes from 1917Farmgirl. Lol...I'm just amazed that you can take an intricate plot about matching wands, locking experiments and anti-locking spells to defeat the phenomenon and write it with such clarity. I also love the way you portray Ron. He's still the loveable but at times insufferable Ron that we all love but he's not written like Watson to Sherlock nor does he play second fiddle to Harry. He's smart and as you have Harry proclaim, the real threat to the DE's. Well done on that portrayal.
Lilygreeneyes is one of my favorites and now I am "Gobsmacked" by your referral to her as a beta. I am truly honored but very humbled all at the same time. I would be very interested but please give me a little time to decide. I have my business schedule to consider before I commit. You made my day. Thanks and good writing. PWAuthor's Response: Farmgirl, Justanothermuggle, Siledubghlase (whom I shall miss) and Avadakedavra1 and I formed somthing of an over-the-hill Potter support group. I take a great deal of inspiration from them (and I hope vice versa).
But, the day I can write emotion like the farmgirl is the day I know I'll truly have become a brilliant author. Just the same, I definitely took a page out of her book for that Molly scene. She's had some great ones, but none so powerful as Molly's "talk" with Lily at her grave in "healing." THAT was AMAZING.
As to the wand thing, again, that inspiration came from ROJ. In that tale, Harry finds Riddle's old wand in the archives and comments that the darn thing should've been destroyed. That got me to thinking, and the result was the duel in the Archives in Battle of the Pitch.
Originally, when I wrote Crusade, Harry's wand locking with Yaxley's was simply a throw back to Dumbles duel with Voldy in the movie version of Order of the Phoenix. I liked the visuals. But, after the fact, and from the review responses I got, I realized that it was likely somthing I needed to explain.
When I wrote Pitch, I needed a McGuffin and the wand seemed to work. Honestly, I'd intended for the wand to burn up in the Archive fire. But, then again, from the review responses, my readers weren't so sure if that's what actually happened. Then, I re-read what I wrote and realized I'd left it vague.
What came next was A LOT of skull sweat. how in merlin's name could Yax have mastered the wand? If he did, why didn't he use it during his duel with Harry in the Archives? If he did manage to get it, Why didn't he have it at the Battle of the Pitch?
Plot holes and unanswered questions...All in all, it took me about a year plus after Crusade to get all the pieces in place. The result is the Tipping Point. I still think Harry's explanation to Ron needs a little tweak, but I'm very pleased you like how it falls into place. That one little flourish is by far and away my most complicated plot development and the hardest explanation I've had to come up with. Pretty long journey getting there too.
Ron. I say this alot, but maturing Ron, letting him grow into a man, but still leaving him recognizable as "our Ron," is one of the flourishes I take the greatest pride in. I really like the character. I love that he's still funny, a bit of a smart mouth, hot-tempered and he still HATES spiders, but he's grown and become a real threat to the DE's through his tactics. I wish JKR had expounded on this point more after his brilliant chess game in Sorcerer's Stone. Anyway, thanks for the praise.
Betaing. Mate, you've a keen eye and are clearly a good writer. The grammar and punctuation end of editing has never been my strong suit, but it really isn't the primary function of a beta (IMHO). Rather, all you need to do is be a sounding board and creative guide. Lot's of my betaing comes down to: "How's about adding this twist there?" or "I'd flesh this out more." or "This was brilliant! More like this." In truth, its a lot like writing review responses except you get advanced copies of the chapters which is exceedingly cool. Betaing for a single author is not overly time consuming. My problem was that I'd taken on A LOT of fanfic commitments (at one point I was betaing for four authors, trying to write my own stuff and dealing with an overload of RL problems, primarily at work). Moreover, since siledubghlase's passing, I'd promised JAM to help him finish off ROJ. Between my horrendous work schedule and my numerous fanfic commitments, I knew I couldn't keep up.
You'd make and EXCELLENT beta for Lily.
Again, great to hear from you my friend.
Eldy Report Review
Eldy: Brilliant, just brilliant. You have a magnificent plot and subplots, your characterizations were perfect and I love the banter and the humor. You tied up a lot of loose-ends and opened up the main concern for everyone: HARRY. He's living way out on the edge. Anymore and I think even Ginny and Hermione will start to balk and seriously rebel. Thank goodness for the link but that won't save a marriage or relationship. I really liked what the Warden said to Harry at Azkaban. It was very telling and Harry needs to heed the warnings. Harry should realize what he means to those that love him. All the victories, awards, money, recognition, etc..., mean nothing to them if he is not around. Ginny, Hermione and Ron will never attain the happiness they deserve without Harry in their lives. As always, Reckless Git and Dangerous Ponce were hilarious.
You are the man. Your stories are amazing and you take us on these incredible rides with your stories. Thank you for your talent and creativity. Well done. PWAuthor's Response: Hey PW!
When I get a review like this, I can't help but feel like all the work that goes into my story telling is worthwhile. It seems that everything I was trying to accomplish in this tale got done. That is extremely satisfying.
Dealing with the wand-lock, the two-wand dueling and the origin of Disgorgio were all things that I wanted to wrap up. But (and you hit it right on the head), I felt I desperately needed to underscore just how worn Harry is by this time in his life. Although I felt I touched on this a bit in Pitch and, to a lesser degree, in the Proposal, the tone of those tales just wasn't quite "dark" enough to properly lead into "Crusade." I needed a bridge from the relative happiness of my pre Crusade world, to the thousand-yard stare mess that Harry expounds upon during his talk with Ron by Dobby's grave in Crusade.
You caught that and it is exceptionally gratifying.
RG and DP is a flourish I wish I'd come up with when I was writing Crusade because its one of my favorites. So much so that I have re-written Hermione and Ginny's talk on the beach in Chapter 3 of Crusade to have them refer to their wizards with these nicknames. I just thought it was vital enough to warrant a ret-con.
Once again, I must thank you for all the praise. I always look forward to getting reviews from you.
P.S. Ah, one final thing. Due to HORRID real life pressures and the untimely passing of siledubghlase, I've had to stop betaing for a number of authors.
Lillygreeneyes (author of "In The Heart of the Battle") was, unfortunately, one of those that I had to abandon. And I feel wretched about it. However, I recommended to her that I thought you would make an amazing beta. She wholeheartedly agreed and asked me, the next time you leave me a review, to pass on her request to you. If you're interested, let her know in a review response and I'm sure you two can find a way to correspond directly either through personal messages at the forums, or via emai.
Keep in mind, the ToS doesn't allow review and responses SOLELY for chit chat, so I'd caution that you make sure to leave a regular review, with a note similar to this one when you contact her. Report Review
Great Filler Eldy!! (10/10 as always)
Explains a lot. Love seeing how Reckless Git and Danger Ponce work together. Such rapport and honest respect for each other. Awesome job as always!! Happy Writing!!
~~Lauraf68Author's Response: Really glad you like the explanations. Those are always SOO tricky.
RG and DP are my new favorite pairing. LOL! I get a kick out of writing them this way. For some reason, my muse just thinks it works. I'm glad you do too.
Again, always a pleasure to get a review from you!
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Catching up on some reading this weekend, so glad to see I get 2 chapters from you.
Wow. The cauldron's a bubbling, huh? Such detail, so many crooks and cranies to your stories -- it amazes me! As always I give you 10/10 -- how could I not??!!
Onto the next chapter. ~LAuthor's Response: Laura!
Great to hear from you. Lots of stuff I always wanted to fill in from Crusade, like why Harry and Yaxley's wand locked. (Took me a couple of years to figure that out. LOL!) and I also wanted to show that the strain is starting to show on Harry before the "main event" in Crusade.
Thanks for the great review!
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Three Cheers for the great and powerful elderwand! Another steller chapter form the Rembrandt of fic reads himself! You were quick on the trigger with this one my friend! A gunslinger with a pen! As to your question about where I get this stuff, alot of it is inspired by ideas I get while reading great HP fanfic, especially yours! Then I play with them! I've been told I have a rapier wit and quirky sense of humor! Some say it's warped and devious! The lady would just tell you that I am exceptionally good at poking fun (especially after we've read one of your offerings, which is why I'm smiling right now)!
Love the wand test scene with Ron and Harry! I have really enjoyed your take on how they become two fisted wand fighters! Also glad to see Ron thought to use his shield after the first go! Give Ron a gentle nudge and he'll catch on faster than Hermoine Granger to a book sale at Flourish and Botts!
Also like the scene between Ron and Hermoine! Our boys are lucky their ladies are so understanding and in love or they would've been hexed into the next decade by now! Those massage scenes were alittle painful to read and a bit ironic -- Ron's moans where close to the ones I made on my chiropractor's table -- ouch!
I think this was a brilliant little cliffy to Children's Crusade! And those of us who have read that masterpiece know the good guys win! Of course, the deathmunchers chances of getting the best of the golden quartet are about as likely as seeing Minerva McGonagall run starkers across the Quidditch pitch at Hogwarts to celebrate another Gryffindor cup win!
Thanks for another magnificent ride, Eldy! The lady and I will be waiting with baited breath for your next epic tale--so I can poke some more fun! :):):)
P.S. I recently attended an actual muggle Quidditch match at a local university. If you ever have a chance to see one, it's a real blast!Author's Response: *Eldy stares at reveiw with stupid grin on his face*
"as likely as seeing Minerva McGonagall run starkers across the Quidditch pitch at Hogwarts to celebrate another Gryffindor cup win"
That completely and totally made my day.
Great to hear from you! And thanks for another amazing review. And I would never say you have a "warped and devious" sense of humor. ;)
Really pleased you liked this. I've been struggling for more than a year trying to figure out 1) whether I should explain the wand lock; 2) whether Yaxley actually did end up with Riddle's old wand and 3) if he did how in Merlin's name did the git ever manage to master it!!!
Yep, I figured Ron wouldn't get smacked again, now that he knew what was coming. But the boys played a little to hard with their new wands - luckily Hermione was there to re-crack his spine. Ouch!
Again, really pleased you and your lady friend enjoyed this tale. More's on the way; just not sure what or when. Oh! Don't forget "Journey of a thousand miles." Still not sure if you've read that one yet; it's part of a collab in my favorites. I can't respond to any review you write since I don't have control over the author's page of that story, but rest assured I'll read it.
P.S. I've heard about Muggle Quidditch but never actually seen it. I will definitely be on the look out! Report Review
Great Gryffindor's gimpy goat warts! Another masterful chapter by the Chagall of cliffhangers himself! Wasn't expecting an update so soon -- you don't give a guy a break, Eldy mate! The lady was overjoyed and I ended up back at my chiropractor's office(still worth it and still smiling)!
I loved the banter between Harry and Ron! It was a real pip and twice as funny! Sounds like Zacharias Smith, the Viscount of Vascillation, sang for Harry like the Mormon Tabernacle Choir! Also sounds like Ginny cut Harry some slack later on -- lucky boy that Potter!
I also wasn't surprised to see my least favorite dungeater, Up Yours Yaxley, resurface for some more merry mayhem -- with "the wand"! That man is more annoying than a bad case of jockitch during a Quiddich match!
Looks like Harry and Ron are going to get busier than Mundungus Fletcher at a flea market! Two big thumbs up to Molly for her foresight in leaving the emergency port key to St. Mungos on the kitchen counter. She knows her boys, and nobody will ever accuse her of being AWOL when the brains were handed out! I'll be watching for your next update from the reviewing stand!
Great wizarding advice #8: It will do you no good to offer a breath mint to an acromantula after insulting it about it's bad breath. If it's that close to you, it's probably too late for the mint!
P.S. Okay maybe not naked Quiddich! But Hey, since there really is a ladies lingerie football league, why not a ladies lingerie quiddich league?! ;)Author's Response: Mate, I'm starting to run out of ways to respond to your reviews. ROFL.
Thanks again and I'm glad you and your lady enjoyed the chapter.
The next, and last should post next weekend and I look forward to hearing from you.
P.S. Mundungus Fletcher at a Flea Market? Where do you come up with this stuff?? LOL! Naked Quidditch, now there's an idea. BTW, thanks for the advice about Acro's and mints...still laughing! Report Review
Hey this is RonMioneOnly from the other Fanfiction site. I like this story too. I've written some on this site, but it's not enough readers, so I gave up on here and decided to do it on the other fanfic that I am found your story on. It's a lot more popular there.Author's Response: Great Galloping Ghosts!!
Thanks for the review. I'm really glad you like my stuff. And I'm glad you found a home for your stories.
It's really important that those of us who've caught the addiction for fanfiction have a support group! LOL!
Thanks again and I hope to hear from you soon.
P.S. I really do appreciate your vigillance. It's important that we look out for each other out here. Plagarism is not cool! Report Review
Wow Eldy, you're making me want to re-read your whole series. Knew Smith was a git, but didn't think/realize a murderous git. Nice chapter, looking forward to "the rest of the story".
Oh yeah, and is there any doubt I give you 10/10. Happy Writing!! ~Lauraf68Author's Response: Thanks Laura!
Yep. Smith is an uber murdering-git!
Re-read the whole series? Now that is really HIGH praise.
P.S. More's coming. Report Review
Eldy: You magnificent pagan god! This story moves so well and you got the characters and their speech and mannerisms right on target. This was short but so sweet. Love the H/G, R/H interaction. It's your story but with a touch of JKR in there. What's really great is that you can still feel the drama from the Battle of the Pitch reaching over into this story.
Love the title, Reckless Git and Danger Ponce. Got a laugh out loud when I read that. As usual, Well Done. PW 10/10Author's Response: PW! Welcome back.
This story started with the title. Ever since I branded H/R with the monikers "Reckless Git and Danger Ponce" I just knew I had to write a story with that in the title. I knew it had to have a buddy-cop feel. I knew it would be more comedy than drama/action. I knew our heroes had to get themselves into one heck of a mess. Other than that, I didn't know what was gonna happen until I started writing it. Then everything just kind of fell into place, with the Battle of the Pitch still in the background, making the witches a little over protective and their wizards a little more desperate to bring the war to an end.
Thanks again, mate. Its always a pleasure to hear from you. More's on the way, just not sure when it'll get written. Soon, tho, I hope.
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