Reading Reviews for THE BALL OF DARKNESS
  
9 Reviews Found

Review #1, by ScorpiusRose17 Where am I??????

13th April 2012:
Hi there!

This is totally different and refeshing. You're doing an excellant job of keeping the curiousity alive. I really like how the Founders don't know why or what they are the founders of. I like that Ron is at the center of this and that you kept his mannerisms and character in tact. Especially when his stomach and food are involved. I like how you've kept Gryffindor and Slytherin in character. Godric being the "spokesperson" and Slytherin being impatient with Ron's time consuming, seemingly, never emptying stomach.

I did see a couple of things that were a bit off. You mentioned Helga the first time in this chapter as Hilda. Also, you used the wrong Hungary. That one is the country in Europe. ;) These are simple little look overs that happen to all of us.

Overall, I think that you have a wonderful story started here. I am curious as heck to know what is going to happen. Like I said it is something I have never seen anything quite like it. I can't wait to see what else you have up your sleeve for this story.

Keep up the good work! =)

-SR17

Author's Response: Hi

This story takes place just before the founders had the idea to found Hogwarts (later on in the story I might drop a hint about how they came up with the idea for Hogwarts).
I had to keep Ron in character, the idea of him never being always HUNGRY just sounds so ridiculous. And Gryffindor was always (in many ways) the only one who could really handle Slytherin in most situations.
How could I have missed that one about Hilda and hungry (another two for the list).
Now that I'm more experienced with writing, anymore chapters should be much longer.
Thanks again for the review, they're so encouraging.


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Review #2, by ScorpiusRose17 THE PROPHECY

13th April 2012:
Oooo this is curious. I have never really read a lot of stories containing the Founders before. I have this real anxiety towards this build up of what is yet to come for the magical and muggle world.

What a spin to include Ron. He never gets his own moments to shine a lot in the series so it's nice that he is the one that this will be centered around.

For a short chapter, you really did a wonderful job sparking the curiousity and building up the angst. I am worried about what will happen to Ron and both worlds. I am also interested in how the Founders are going to play into this more.

One thing that I did notice, because I will admit I'm a nit pick is that you used the word a lot in the chapter it's used as alot. Just thought I would point that out. I also had a question...Is Ron a Chaser on the Quidditch team in this story? Just so it's clear to me and I don't keep thinking while reading it that he's suppose to be a Keeper.

I really like it! Keep up the good work! =)

-SR17

Author's Response: Hi

Thanks once again for coming back helping me with this story.
To answer your question. Ron is a keeper in this story. He hit the Quaffle from one end of the pitch to the other end. I suppose I should have really made that more clearer (put on the list to do).
Yes I suppose Ron deserves his turn in the spotlight. That really is the reason why I came up with this idea.
Thanks for the read and review.


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Review #3, by Hogwarts27 THE PROPHECY

15th October 2011:
Hi, I've dropped by several times over the last few months to check out what you're writing, have looked at all your stories, and have read quite a few of them - just never wrote a review. You've got a terrific imagination to have this many stories in progress.

In terms of writing quality and style, I think this chapter, although short, is the best chapter of any that you've written so far on any story. I like the ominous feeling of it. Your descriptions are good, and the character dialogue is excellent. The dialogue fits the characters in their time period, it's very well-phrased, and adds to the mood you're trying to create. I think with a little minor editing and careful attention to the phrasing of sentences, you could even polish this chapter a bit more if you had a mind to. For example, the first two lines of the paragraph right after the prophecy are absolutely wonderful and perfectly phrased. Even a chapter as short as this one can be powerful if it's got dynamic writing like that throughout - with attention to making every word in the sentence count and be well-phrased. You're definitely on the right track with this chapter in terms of quality writing.

Author's Response: Thank you for such an awesome review. It makes me tingle all over when I read words like this and also know that people are enjoying what I write.
I always think that everyone has a story in them and have the ability to write it. But it's getting it down on paper that can throw alot of people off.
I will be going over all my stories again later and make changes. But plz check out the start of my new one (called T.E.C.H.) and tell me what you think. I'd value your opinion very much.
Thanks again for the awesome words of praise, and happy reading my fellow author.


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Review #4, by Pixileanin Where am I??????

10th August 2011:
It is an interesting notion that the founders do not seem to be from the same world as Ron. I always thought of them as same-worldly. Now I see how you are characterizing Ron, and I'm not surprised. Thirteen-year olds do eat a lot. I wonder though, does Ron realize that the founders don't know about Hogwarts? They seemed to not know what he was talking about. I think that if I were Ron, it would surprise me and I'd be asking more questions.

pixileanin (Gryffindor)

Author's Response: Thanks again for the review. You have just given me an idea for this story (where Hogwarts and Ron is concerned) so there will be more questions so watch this space. As to Ron's eating habits, I was trying to keep him in character (he does like his food). Thanks once again for taking the time to leave a comment.

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Review #5, by Pixileanin THE PROPHECY

10th August 2011:
Hi!

This opening was pretty good. I enjoyed how you had the Founders involved. It sounds ominous! It makes me wonder how you are going to characterize Ron, if you are making him the central figure in the story. Is he going to be the same Ron as we see in HP? Is he going to be stronger? Weaker? I'm glad you chose Ron. There is so much potential there.

pixileanin (Gryffindor)

Author's Response: Thank you for stopping by and leaving a comment, reviews mean so much. Ron is to be the main character in this story, I thought I'd give him a chance of being the hero for a change. Thanks again for the review.

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Review #6, by Ydnas Odell Where am I??????

25th July 2011:
Well done! Excellent!

Author's Response: Thank you that's high praise. Please feel free to read what I've posted so far of my other stories, there are one or two updates to come for them. Also please look out for a new short story (going through validation) called Ade's magical awakening. Prequel to Son of Potter vs Son of Bellatrix. Thanks again for taking the time to leave a message. Happy reading.

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Review #7, by MyMyMiss THE PROPHECY

3rd June 2011:
;)
I like the idea that you portrayed with this story. Its rather intriging. Just a question.
Was the bold bit a little from Moonacre Valley? >.< I love that Movie and it just seemed very similar. :D
Very well done. x

Author's Response: Thank you for the review. I have never heard of the movie that you mentioned. I just thought of the prophecy on the spur of the moment. I'm currantly working on the update, so please keep an eye out for it. Thanks again for the review.

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Review #8, by Victoria LH THE PROPHECY

28th March 2011:
So glad you're doing a Ron story.

Author's Response: I thought it was time to give Ron a shot of fame. I'll update as soon as I can.

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Review #9, by mugglemania THE PROPHECY

15th March 2011:
Hmmm kind of ominous, if you know what I mean. It sounds good and interesting so far. I'll be looking to read more (soon, I hope).
10/10

Author's Response: Hi, Glad that you think it sounds good so far. As to the ominous look to the story, well I wanted to let Ron have an adventure all of his own. He'll meet up with new friends who'll help him on his way. And you know what the Harry Potter stories are like. There's always a bit of an ominous side to them. DARK AND MYSTERIOUS at times. Will try and update soon. If I remember rightly I've put the next chapter of Son of Potter vs Son of Bellatrix through for validation, so hopefully that will be up soon. Thanks for the rating.

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