Reading Reviews for Searching
  
8 Reviews Found

Review #1, by IwRiTe4mE To Be Lost

26th June 2011:
Wow. This is like super good. Like I'm at a loss for words. This was fantastic.
~Kat

Author's Response: Thanks so much for the Review Kat! :D *squish*
Annie


 Report Review

Review #2, by TenthWeasley To Be Lost

19th March 2011:
Okay, this seems to be a problem. I DEFINITELY thought that I'd left a review for this wonderful story... Apparently, I was mistaken. No matter! I am now going to attempt to rectify that error!

This was such a beautiful story, Annie - and I don't just say that because Cedric was in it! :D Your descriptions were hauntingly beautiful and poetic, and definitely kept me reading. There was a dark mystique to this story that just hooked be in - it made me want to know so much more about Emily. And your plot was so good! I love the history and backstory you've added into this - it adds substance and depth to something that only benefited from this. :D

I can't tell you how proud I am that LO inspired something of this quality, especially as LO is more fluff than anything else at the moment. X3 I lovelovelove Cedric and you've done him justice, dear! Wow... you're just so sweet, it boggles the mind. :D *squish* Thank you for the totally sweet mention!

What else can I say? BEAUTIFUL. You've got major talent, Annie. :)

Author's Response: *hugs* Thanks dear! I'm so glad you liked this and I really liked writing Cedric! :) I really liked imagining Emily's back story because she isn't like characters I've written before. Thanks so much for the review
Annie


 Report Review

Review #3, by Mintleaf To Be Lost

13th March 2011:
Hello! Another songfic but this one's a different cup of tea! I actually started listening to AFI when I was ten years old and joined the Despair Faction (their following) , the moment I turned thirteen so I have no trouble reading this at all haha. While I don't actually listen to them very much anymore, I still love their older stuff to bits haha!

Anyway...

Grammar/Readability:
'as the memories of her confusion came back to her.' There's something weirdly perplexing about this phrase.

A bit of a silly thing to notice but the beginning of your fourth paragraph has a space in front of it! haha.

Also, I think you should put a bit more space between the two times you used the word 'discreetly' But that's not very important.

I would consider moving the comma in this sentence, 'The chilling sensation that ran through her fingertips and down her spine contrasted the warm feeling encasing her body from her curled position during the night so sharply, Emily nearly jumped back in shock.' I think this might sound better, 'The chilling sensation that ran through her fingertips and down her spine contrasted the warm feeling encasing her body from her curled position during the night, so sharply that Emily nearly jumped back in shock.

' Your Cedric Diggory, famed Hufflepuff Quidditch star...' you're* :)


Characterization:
Emily's speech seems oddly stilted but maybe that's just something in her character? She does seem to have had a formal upbringing so maybe that's it?

Cedric's just has the most glowing temperament, I think. It really shines through here :)


Plot/Flow:
'Her quest became her destination', this explains what's happening really nicey.

The paragraph when she was watching the shadows is gorgeous!

The end is really endearing and lovely and it all ties in well with the song! Good work :)

Author's Response: I had actually hardly listened to AFI before this challenge, so it was a new experience for me, but I really love their music now and I'm glad you got to read a song by an band you like! :)

I noticed my spacing was a bit off when I put it in, but I couldn't figure out where to fix it. (I was on my iPod, but I'll have a look now that I have a bigger screen as to where I can fix my spacing.) I'll be sure to go and fix my grammar mistakes! Eeek, they are like fingernails on chalkboard nopw that you've pointed them out!

I haven't quite wrapped my head around how Emily was written, and some of her stilted dialogue was meant to be there, simply because that's how she reacts to things, but it does seem much more formal than it was intended to be. Her childhood was rough, and I haven't figured out most of it, but I know she was raised like an adult should behave rather than how a child ought to behave.

Cedric was so much fun to write! :D

I love the shadows, I think they're so mysterious and fits Emily's way of thinking perfectly.

Thank you so much and have a great day,
-ginger


 Report Review

Review #4, by sk8trmafia08/cwatts12 To Be Lost

13th March 2011:
That...that was beautiful. I love what you did with the song, and this was an amazing story!

I'll re-read it closer to April 17 for judging. :)

Oh, and I hate to be picky, but that quote you attributed to Whitman is actually by J.R.R. Tolkien. If I weren't such a Tolkien freak, though, I probably wouldn't have noticed the difference. :P

sk8tr

Author's Response: Beautiful? You think so? Oh thank you thank you than k you! No adjective could make me happier than I am right now!

Oh dear, how could I have screwed the quote up like that? *rushes to go change it*

-ginger


 Report Review

Review #5, by LadyMalfoy23 To Be Lost

13th March 2011:
aw, this is really good. Its sooo deep and mysterious to a point.

The flow was phenominal straight from one thing and then from her thought to dialog! Very good. Your use of description throughout the entire story was great, very very very good at putting images into my mind!! An amazing read hun truly amazing!

Author's Response: Thaks Jess, oh II'm so glad it has your stamp of approval! :)

Eeep, this has just put a HUGE grin on my face! I'm so glad you thought it flowed well and that the description was good! :) Thanks for the amazing review,
-Annie


 Report Review

Review #6, by candens To Be Lost

13th March 2011:
Helps that I absolutely love this song :P and you interwove it with your story so well! :D I like Emily. She's interesting and although she's 'damaged' shes pretty sweet.

Author's Response: Ever since I got the song for the challenge, I've been listening to it over and over and I really like it now! hehe, thanks! Putting the lyrics in the right place is always worrying, so I'm really relieved you thought they fit! Emily's certainly interesting and I like her despite the things that are a little off about her.
-ginger


 Report Review

Review #7, by Toujours Padfoot To Be Lost

12th March 2011:
Sorry it took me so long to get over here. My daughter decided she was going to be in a very cranky mood when she woke up from her nap.

So, for starters:

*cookies!*

FAVORITE BIT:

His shadow met hers and she could see his shadow arm pulling her arm back. Her shadow spun around and she felt her own body pushing through the heavy cloud that clung to her like she clung to it. The shadow was visible out of the corner of her eye, and the figment that matched it's darker friend was as real as it had been just moments before in the cafe.

I just had to repeat that entire paragraph, because I liked it so much. Brilliant imagery right there! I was imagining this tussle with shadows and real people, mixing them up, and it was just spectacular.

:O

And I am SO curious about Emily! I want to know more about her and her family, and where she's going. I vote that you should follow up on this with more, or turn this one-shot into a three-shot or something. Pretty please? Because it's very interesting. Emily's got this really angsty depth that I find hard to resist. She needs someone like Cedric, I think (You may have to share him with Rachel, but there's plenty of Cedric to go around). ;)

I agree, Leaping Obstacles is very inspiring. Jane's just one of those people who you feel like your life has been enriched just by getting the chance to know her. Know what I mean?

I really liked this one-shot. And I hope that someday, you'll bring Emily more into the flesh, and write more about her (I won't ask for a novel, but the idea is still there...*wink wink*). I must know her background!!

:D

Author's Response: No problemo, I understand!! :D (And it took me forever to respond to your amazing review, so I ought to be the one apologizing!)

YAY! *sets out cookies for Sarah and her cranky daughter*

*dances* I am rather obsessed with shadows and I'm really over the moon that you liked the shadows description thing, because it took me forever to decide if I was even going to use that description. It just fits Emily's views on the world so well that I had to keep them in, and it seems the shadows were a good thing! =]

A three-shot you say? Hehe, I'll think about it and if the queue stay short (*hugs for EPIC validators!*) then I'll put something together! :D She's really one of my favorite OCs to write, but I don't exactly have a plot for her, so a three-shot could be difficult. :P Share?!!? Emily doesn't do sharing!! (Hehe, I could make a character named "Rachel" come in and cause trouble just to make poor Jane mad :P)

I know exactly what you mean and Jane is just... so Janetastical! It's inspirational!

(Not another one-shot I need to write a novel about! I just turned a one-shot into a novel! (dies in exhaustion* Hehe, we'll see dearie, we'll see!

Thansk for the AH-MAZE-ING review,
-Annie


 Report Review

Review #8, by SexyDoorFrames To Be Lost

12th March 2011:
This was a beautiful start to what seems to be a wonderful story. I adore Emily so far! She's a really interesting character you've created, I adore her! And I want to know more about her, which is always good and I love her interactions with Cedric. Talking of Cedric, I like the way you've wrote him so far in the story, it seems very canon of him to be like this and nothing strikes me as odd with his character. He's the sort of character we know something about who they are but not enough. I really like your writing style, it's vivid and this flows effortlessly.

Good start!

- Keely.
xxx

Author's Response: Hi Keely and thanks for the review! (The swap was great; I really enjoyed reading chapter 2 of Pippa's story! :D)

Emily has to be one of my favorite OCs I've written in a while, and I'm glad you adore her because I want to write about her again sometime! :) *dances* Yay for good Cedric characterization!! Hehe, this was actually a one-shot that I messed up the story shell for, but I do think I want to continue Emily and Cedric's story somehow because this was just really enjoyable to write. If I do continue, I'll be sure to let you know! :)
-Annie


 Report Review
If this is your story and you wish to respond to reviews, please login