Reading Reviews for The Simplest of Words
  
15 Reviews Found

Review #1, by PolyJuice_ Prologue

18th March 2014:
Blackout Battle ~ Redo 2/2

Hiya, oh my gosh. This just brings up all the feels. You're such a powerful writer that reading something about Sirius's death just makes me wanna curl up in a ball, eat chocolate and cry.

I'm a little curious, what spring day are you talking about? I'm probably completely insane and it's right there, but where's that from? Canon? (ijustknowi'mmissingsomethingomgi'mstupid)

But oooh, I liked the way you brought bits from JKRs stories into this, making it all the more realistic. Honestly, you're gonna ruin me, talking about Sirius seeing Harry crying. Sheesh. You can't make a person feel all this, they'd explode! :P

Anywho, I loved this story to bits, can't wait to go read chapter two!

Liz

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Review #2, by FredWeasleyIsMyKing Regrets

15th March 2014:
Hi again!

So another good chapter. I've read a few after-life stories and each one is unique but I did really like this. You had James to meet him which couldn't be more perfect and you also have Sirius needing to face up to some of his inner demons.

It's sad that Sirius and Regulus never had the chance to make up. I honestly want to believe that they were more similar than they first thought and had things been different they would have been closer. I think you did a good job of showing Sirius's guilt and regret here though, even though it isn't completely his fault.

I liked your characterisation of both James and Sirius in this. Nothing felt out of place at all, it was really natural to read.

I think you did a really great job of something that can't have been easy to write... you got a lot of emotion in this so great job!

Lauren :)
Gryffindor vs Slytherin Review 16 of 20

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Review #3, by FredWeasleyIsMyKing Prologue

15th March 2014:
Hi again Selene.

So when I saw something Sirius on your AP I definitely wanted to check it out and I'm so glad I did!

So, every review I've left you so far I've complimented you on your description and once again I have to! I love the detail you add to your stories and the words you use flow beautifully. It just makes your chapters so easy and lovely to read. The way you described Sirius dueling with Bella as a tango was great.

It was interesting reading this moment from Sirius's POV rather than Harry's, but also really gutting. When he sees his godson shouting for him my heart broke again because I felt so awful for Harry in that moment. The whole situation is just horrible.

You have left me with a question though... who should he have said 'I love you' too? I guess I can only read on to find out!

Again, brilliant chapter and I'm really excited there's a chapter two I can head over to read!

Lauren :)
Gryffindor vs Slytherin review 15 of 20

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Review #4, by ImagineHarmony Prologue

17th July 2013:
Hi there!

I really liked this! The emotions you captured in Sirius' last moments was just... phenomenal. Beautifully portrayed everything, those little things that made him like his brother is written in such a way that you remind who he actually is! This is just great, really. And an amazing way to keep the reader guessing: the last line.

I don't know how to say this but the last line just caught everything, tied it up and summarised the entire life of Sirius in eleven words. I have feelings okay :P

You just caught me here: "All the smiles, pranks, and the laughs; the girls, the games they played, the fights they had fought. It was like those old stories you heard, but different all the while."

You've given that sweet, sad, dark melancholy that's just truly phenomenal. A GREAT READ. I have to red the next chapter!

Author's Response: For Sirius' final moments, I pulled from my own experiences in losing family and friends. It was the only way I could discover what might go through his head, what questions and regrets he might have.

Having feelings is fine. We all do! I'm glad that the story kept you hooked and wanting more until the last line.

Its reviews like yours that make me regret that I've allowed myself to not update this sooner and more often. I truly enjoy working on this project but the slight perfectionist in me doesn't want to put up a chapter before its ready. Thank you so much for the wonderful, aww-inducing review dear! ~Selene


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Review #5, by magnolia_magic Regrets

17th July 2013:
Back for chapter 2! I loved your idea about the afterlife, having to resolve any leftover issue before getting the chance to move forward. It's a very poetic way of thinking about it. I love the memory Sirius chose. Those things say a lot about a person, I think, and it makes sense that Sirius would choose to remember a moment when he was "home" at Hogwarts, with his closest friends around him.

And you've got me very curious about that one regret Sirius hasn't let go of yet! I can't wait to see what it could be about. I suppose I'll have to be patient. I hope you're planning to update this, because I really did enjoy it :)

Author's Response: I do plan on updating it! .eventually. I think there will be two chapters before this is finished, but the 'regret' won't be revealed until the final one, chapter 4.

But yes, Sirius (like Harry) felt most at home at Hogwarts to me. He didn't come from a pleasant home, due to him being the black sheep of the Black family. The Marauders were his family. And when you are at your weakest, what do you want more than the comfort of family?

Thank you for the review!!


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Review #6, by magnolia_magic Prologue

17th July 2013:
Ooh, what an interesting start! You've done such a wonderful job with this first chapter. I remember seeing this moment in the book from Harry's point of view, so it's really interesting to see it from Sirius' eyes. All the talk of memories really tugged at my heartstrings toward the end, as well as his wondering if he'd ever told Harry he loved him. What a tragic thing. I think you did a great job of getting all that emotion across. You also have some beautiful description here; I especially loved "blackened tango." That's a really creative way to describe a duel, and it's so fitting.

Great start! Hopefully I'll get to the next chapter very soon :)

Author's Response: Thank you so much for the review! This was originally written for a challenge, but I didn't finish it in time to submit it. There is still at least two chapters for this story but I've hit a road block for Ch 3 that I can't seem to smooth out...

Thank you so much for your compliment about the descriptions! I try to paint a picture using words when I write, which is probably why I get stuck so often.

Thank you for the lovely review!


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Review #7, by Jenna822 Regrets

9th January 2012:
(Prize Review #2)

Oh...my. I'm a bit speechless because this was just so powerful. I love the way you have the story layered, showing scenes from the past while having a present day Sirius coping with them. The addition of James on top of it all is brilliant. I love the way James doesn't show any animosity or blame towards Sirius, because I truly think if given the chance, he'd say just what you portrayed. Very nice chapter and I look forward to reading more of this. Shall add it to my faves so I miss nothing. :) --Jenna

Author's Response: I believe that if the Potters had survived that Halloween, they would not blame Sirius or allow him to blame himself. They each made the decision not knowing the truth about a man they thought a friend. So having James there provided a bit of comfort to Sirius as he deals with everything.

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Review #8, by Jenna822 Prologue

9th January 2012:
(Prize Review #1)

This was a beautiful prologue. You put the focus on Sirius directly, which made it so much more heartbreaking. And the way you trailed off at the end was a great set up for the coming chapters. All of the technical stuff was spot on, and you're writing style is very pleasant. Nothing but good things to say on this chapter. :D --Jenna

P.S. I sent you a message on the forums about your other prize reviews. I noticed that you had a lot of old stories and wasn't sure if you'd rather I review those or if you have some new stuff coming out that I can review if you prefer. I notice this is a WIP so I can follow it if you'd like. :) Just let me know either way.

Author's Response: Thank you for the review Jenna! I hope to be able to finish this story sometime soon.

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Review #9, by Giola Prologue

12th August 2011:
Hi Selene!

I had no idea what to expect when I clicked on this, and I did not see the last line coming at all (I really should have, thinking back...but I didn't). You described the battle scene brilliantly, you have an amazing grasp on Sirius' character and his internal monologue.

His reflection on his life was very well done as well, I didn't find it cliche in the slightest, given the way you've written it. Your style of writing is perfect for this sort of thing, it's simple and you don't try to over-describe things. The last three sentences have stuck with me, whirling around in my head creating a story of Sirius' lost love, which I'm assuming was your intention in leaving it so.

Well done, this is a lovely one shot :)

-Giola
(Slytherin)

Author's Response: Aww thank you Giola!! I tried to make this moment, written and read so many times by fans everywhere, stick out a little without being over the top. I love Sirius dearly so it was a challenge to kill him. All I want to do is make him live a long and happy life.

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Review #10, by Drecklin Prologue

12th August 2011:
This was just so sad. I mean, I am sure you expected it to be that way, but this is just really sad D: I've often thought of what it would have been like for Sirius when he died, and it was like this- but you made it so much more real that what I had imagined. The most effective part of this story had to have been where Sirius watched Harry suffer, and yet wasn't able to do anything about it. Just the thought of that playing out in my head brings a sad face to my face.

Your writing was really effective in bringing out the emotion of this story, and I commend you on it. Such a great job, and I am glad to have read it. I hope there is more to come on this story, such as an explanation of the 'I love you'- but to be honest, considering the challenge and the summary, I think that is the whole point of this story :P

Great job, Selene!!

Forum Name: Drecklin
House: Slytherin

Author's Response: Oh Drecklin, thank you! Even if I am almost two years late with it. :) Obviously the challenge is long gone, but I'm still attempting it. There are only two more planned chapters before this is finished and I'm having some difficulty with the 3rd one. I want it to have the same depth of emotions as the previous but I haven't given up hope on it. Never, since I want to see this through so badly.

I remember writing this, we had just had a passing in the family, which helped draw on the emotions that might have been going through the characters at such a time.


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Review #11, by Akussa Prologue

11th August 2011:
This was so beautifully tragic. It is short and extremely powerful; I really loved it. Sirius' death was such a hard moment for me, like pretty much everyone else, and to read about it in the point of view is almost a balm on my pain. Picturing him aware of what is happening, not in pain but joined by his happy memories.

I loved the fight with Bellatrix; passionate and to the kill. You also created such a detailed and tangible description of the scene; it was almost as if I could feel the air and smell the electricity you described. You did a truly magistral job here.

I saw a couple little errors, mostly ponctuations but, one sentence was more glarring than the others (maybe because of the emotional tension in it) :

"towards him to late to dodge."; that should be "... 'too' late to dodge."

Overall, a really touching story. One that makes me want to go around and let my loved ones know how much I love them, just in case. Wonderful job,

Akussa (Gryffindor)

Author's Response: Thank you very much Akussa. I appreciate you pointing out that 'to/too' error since to/too is one of my problem spots. By you pointing it out, it helps me learn from mistakes.

His death in the book was one of the few times I cried during the series and will admit it. Doing this was helpful and the experience from reading it the first time helped write it. Thank you again for such a touching review.


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Review #12, by Debra20 Prologue

11th August 2011:
Happy Slytherin Day!!

Only three reviews? Are you serious? This story deserves so much more. It's so touching, so moving, so heart breaking! Yes, you did bring tear to my eyes.

You stayed so true to Sirius's character it's almost frightening. I can't tell you enough how much this means to me. It's always so hard writing about the internal thoughts and feelings of a character without dangerously swaying on the edge of out of character-ness. Especially more prominent character of whom we know pretty much. So I am beyond pleased by this story on this side.

The flow was great, every detail fell into it's rightful place and his feelings were deep and yet calm. Calm with the foreboding of death. I really enjoyed your idea of his life flashing before his eyes seconds before he dies. I have always imagined that's what happens when you're about to die but are still conscious about you. I loved his calmness. His stability even in death. A wonderful, wonderful piece!


House Cup 2011, End of an Era Review Extravaganza
Forum name: Debra20
House: Gryffindor

Author's Response: My first reaction is to say I didn't mean to make you cry! But at the same time I figure thats a good thing! Staying true to Sirius through this piece is very important to me because ultimately he will do something very un-Sirius. So making sure the rest of it read and felt like Sirius is very important to me. Thank you very much for the review Debra20 :)

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Review #13, by slytherinchica08 Prologue

6th August 2011:
First i must say i really like how you started it off it just catches you right away! The description that you have throughout this is beautiful as well! I really like how you called it a blackened tango it just really made me visualize it. It was a really great beginning to this and I really would like to see where this goes next and what is the late spring day that he is talking about... who is he talking about. Your beginning flowed really well and kept me interested until the very last word of the last sentence. Great Job.

~Slytherinchica08~
~Slytherin~

Author's Response: Thank you very much. I'm fond of this story because I've watched it evolve and change in ways I didn't think I was capable of creating. The person he is talking about will be revealed two chapters away when this story ends. :) Thank you for the review, very much so. It gives a confidence boost.

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Review #14, by CoLorful DreaM Prologue

13th May 2011:
11 of 15!

I love stories with Sirius! ( I fancied him for a while..hm,hm...)
I think.no, I'm sure I never read a story of Sirius' last thoughts before.
Very well written.

~Mommy

Author's Response: This story I am enjoying more than I ever thought since I've watched it evolve so much before I can even get something typed up.

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Review #15, by gingersnape Prologue

9th March 2011:
Hello, gingersnape here with your review from my challenge!

Wow, this was stunning! Sirius is an incredibly interesting character and when I saw he was going to be involved in this story, I was intrigued, but you have gone much farther than I could have imagined when I read the summary. Just the prologue has me wanting to read on with it and has made me really think about the relationship Sirius must have had with Harry in a whole new light. I can't wait to read on, and good luck with your writing! :)
-ginger

Author's Response: I am a horrible review responding person. :(

Ginger, thank you so much for this review it really means a whole lot to me! I was sure this story would be a bomb and I am sorry I never finished it in time for the challenge deadline. I do like where it is going though. Thank you so much.


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