THEY DIDN'T KISS :( NO!Author's Response: didn't feel appropiate - what else would you expect of Charlotte? ;)
thanks for the review! Report Review
Oh my! I don't even know how many times I snorted because of James. That was hysterical. It was so scattered and random...I LOVED IT! That's exactly what I like in humor stories, 'randomosity' as I have deemed it when defining my stories.
There were so many lines! Chames for one, all hail Chames. I believe I read the other story you referred to.
- You don't touch James Potter's system. Eye twitch.
- So, I continue my woeful tale, she looks up at me with those amazing brown eyes and then she does it. That horrid, horrible thing that girls do to guys as they take them in, looking all over you and making you feel as if they are undressing you with their eyes. The Onceover!
- Sadly, Wilbur isn't very tall, you see, and I had to jump up and down in his shoulders to get to see her more clearly. Finally I just dropped my omniculars because I couldnít see anything thanks to how much I was moving and jumping.
- 'MAYDAY!' I yelled and me and Wilbur dropped to the ground, our arms covering our head like in an earthquake drill.
- 'Like a hating thing against someone for no reason. I think it is a synonym for racism, if I may.'
- 'Can I snog you?' I blurt.
I was hysterical laughing at all those parts. I loved James so much! There were a few grammatical errors by the way but I still loved it!Author's Response: JAMES JAMES JAMES JAMES JAMES. I love him. But you can have him ^__^ and yes, I shall beta that soon. Thanks for the fantastic review! Report Review
History is repeating itself, good job anyways, update soon!Author's Response: of course! it always does :) thanks Report Review
I loved it!
My fave lines were:
"Iím the son of the man who saved you. So shut up and listen." and the evil bionic butterflies from hell!
I love your portayl of James! :)Author's Response: oh, awesome! yeah, those are mine too :) James is so great *heart*
really? thanks! :D thanks for reviewing! Report Review
This was really good! I love a bit of James/OC so to read this made me super happy. I loved the fact that it was in James POV, it made a nice change to read it from his POV instead of a girls. So kudos for that. Also I love the fact that the she walked away at the end, it cracked me up! I'd love to see a sequel or something to it. I love the character you've given James, it was truly refreshing to read about him like this.
In all, I loved it.
- SDFAuthor's Response: oh, hi! yay! im glad you liked it. I know, and I have never written in a bloke's POV before so I figured it was a good place to start, since I lOVE james :) and of course she walked away! she doesn't want anything to do with him ;) a sequel? hmmm. sounds interesting. well, i think it was time her became the pretty little stalker :D
thanks so much!! Report Review
Hi, its strawberrydarhling here with your review :)
I really enjoyed this one-shot but I might be a bit based because I have never read a James II / OC before even though its one of my favourite ships (that totally dosen't make sense and has nothing to dow ith anything so I'm just going to shut up now).
However I did spot a few grammar mistakes and I also noted that you repeated yourself quite a lot. And also, i don't see why Charlotte would punch James as soon as she met him.
I would also suggest you get a beta to polish everything up and smooth out the rough edges.
Nevertheless I still really enjoyed this and think yo have done a great job to say this is your first time writing in a male POV.
xxAuthor's Response: hi! im glad you like it and yes i need a beta -was going to get into that soon :p I revised the story and she never punched him when they met... unless you mean verbally-punch him, then yes. But that's the idea! She's psycho!
well, im happy this went well considering i went into the inexplored terrioty that is the male mind :D thanks so much! Report Review
Once again i loved it! james is so awesome, i think him stalking Charlotte is somehow cute but at the same time is kinda creepy. i love charlotte's attitude that's how girls should be! not just falling for any hot boy (don't listen to me you know how i am when it comes to dudes, but i love them anyways ha ha) it's such a cool story and i think it's really convinving how you play on a bloke's mind! great job miss
no need to add i love YOU and your great stories
Please, to hbelp my mental state, keep writingAuthor's Response: hey, Hug-Wanting Voldy ;) yay! im so glad you like! i didnt know if i knew how to enter a dude's mind, but i think i did well. and of course! James is cute and creepy. My *somewhat favorite personality for him *heart* and yes you love BOYS. but yay!
thanks! ;D Report Review
Really enjoyed it! James is very well written and to travel in his head is a joyride I want to take again!!
The only think that bothered me with this story is the begining; you change your narative for no reason and that was strange. It was hard to keep on reading because I was afraid you would do it again!! But no, the rest was great and higly entertaining, great job!Author's Response: oh yay! Im glad i did well James since I was a little sceptical never having written from a boy's perspective before!
hm... was that weird? Ill change it then :) but great! thanks so much! Report Review
First review? Do I even have to say anything other than CHAMES! Your Charlotte is a little different than mine, like mine tries to play games but, as we will find out in the sequel, shes as good at it as she thinks she is (I hate glame players :P).But in a lot of ways they are really the same :)
Haha "do you want to snog me", sorry cant remember a direct quote - I'm not going to go into it as its innapropriate but a male friend of mine one went up to a randowm girl and said something really explicit, yet straightforward like that without meaning to! So funny!
Ah James, youre so silly. Leave the poor girl alone. actually, wait, dont, i love chames! And a bit of stalking never does any harm (Albus is the stalker for me though! My James wouldnt even think of doing that!)
You are getting the kickbutt sequel dedicated to you! You better do something else with Chames too, I love that ship and youre the only other one who writes it1 :L
Anyway.. Favouriting! Go you! :)Author's Response: YAY!!1 YOU LIKE IT! THANKS!
im thinking about dedicating this to you in favour of our Chames'. How come didn't I think of that before? I will send this for validation again with your dedication once i get the banner :) and that your male friend thing sounds funny -you should tell me in a PM :p
i get that everyone makes Al the poor stalker -even me on later chapters of Dom- so i guessed it was time for James! after all, he would be so shocked of a girl not falling on his feet, right? he would!
yay! dedication! thanks so much, we have to do this since its like we both wrote it at the same time :D
thanks, Brightie Star :D :D :D Report Review
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