Reading Reviews for Wolf
  
33 Reviews Found

Review #1, by The Last Marauder IV

18th July 2012:
Again, your definition of dramatic blew my mind! How do you come up with not only a definition, but also questions pondering the very definition itself?

I really loved the idea of Jo and Greyback reading the letters from M, though I will admit I didn't quite understand what was going on, but I think that was the point, right?

I love how you are showing the characters growing up now that they are in their sixth year - the idea that they were too old to use the map anymore, it links back to their ponderings on what to do once they leave school in the previous chapters. I really like how you are grounding each of your characters in reality, it makes the story all the more compelling to read. I also like how you are marking the point of change as that moment at the end of fifth year, the moment where something happened with Jo (I'm guessing it involves Greyback and the old lady you talked about in the opening chapter - have I missed something?), but I really like how you are sort of keeping the reader in the dark about that in one way, but also slowly revealing details at the same time, so we have to piece it all together like a jigsaw.

I loved Honey the elf - she was brilliant. And not only did you get the house elf mannerisms down to a tee, but you also made her completely your own. I loved her brand of reasoning and I agree with Jo, I'd love her as my lawyer too if I was ever up against the Wizangamot

Brilliant story, well done, YOU MUST UPDATE SOON, I need to read more of this story 10/10

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Review #2, by The Last Marauder III

18th July 2012:
Your definition of a lie was mind blowing, I just sat there pondering for a moment after I read it - it's so philosophical, I could contemplate the meaning of lies forever and still be nowhere near understanding it fully, if that makes any sense.

I loved how you explored the idea of what they were going to do after school. That was never really captured properly in the HP books, because obviously Harry had to go hunt Horcruxes. But your characters seem all the more real in the sense that they, like pretty much every Muggle their age, don't know what they want to do when they leave school, and can't envision a world without all their friends in the same place. It's little details like that that are bringing this story to steaming life! great stuff!

I loved the word-play game with Jo and Felix, it was just brilliant, they sort of each out-do the other, it reminds me of something you'd see in an Oscar Wilde play - the idea of playing with langauge and wit, one character trying to out do the other. It just blows my mind how well you write. This is fantastic stuff, and you're probably tired of me saying that, but I just can't say anything else. this is BRILLIANT!

I love Professor Waskruski the more I read about her. I loved the idea of the case too and how she had been trying for years to solve it with Arithmancy. Where do you get your story ideas from? I wish I had your mind!

Awesome work! I can't wait for the next chapter!

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Review #3, by The Last Marauder II

18th July 2012:
I love your opening paragraphs - they are fantastic, they draw me into the story and after I read them, I just pause for a moment, and ponder them - you've got serious talent, honest to Merlin you do! I wish I could write like you!

What I love here is that you are showing that Greyback wasn't always a monster - and that he had friends that wanted to show him that too. It's a bit like what Dumbledore said about Harry - he was protected by his ability to love - it's the same idea, that something like love or friendship could have kept Greyback safe too, he didn't have to be the monster. He had friends that cared about him, so I'm really interested to see what happens here, to see where you go with this and how to have Greyback become what he is by the time the HP readers meet him.

I loved Professor Waskruski at the end and the idea of choosing between what you need and what you want. It's a very important lesson in life that. Now I'm really interested to hear your definition of what a lie is - I loved your definition of monster at the start of this chapter - how do you come up with such great stuff?

Anyway, fantastic job, and as soon as I finish all my reviewing, you will be added to my favourite authors! I have loved everything you've written so far, but this story is my favourite - can't wait to read on 10/10

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Review #4, by The Last Marauder I

18th July 2012:
Where do you come up with the ideas for your stories? You've such a brilliant mind - I'm so jealous.

Remus Lupin is my favourite character, and I always focus on him when it comes to the werewolf issue, but I never give Greyback much thought, aside from the idea that he is the monster that cursed Remus. I never paused to think what Greyback went through when he was bitten, how it must have been for him. I don't much care for Greyback, but your chapter here has changed that slightly.

I really love how human you made Greyback, how he was always different, but very much human. All your original characters were brilliant too, even though I just met them, I feel like a know them, if that makes any sense. You convey so much with words, it's absolutely fantastic!

I've no cc's to give at all - can't wait to read on, this is shaping up to be a very interesting story! :)

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Review #5, by Santa Claus IV

24th December 2011:
CHRISTMAS EVE!

I really enjoyed reading this, and have realised that that's it! I know that people move on with other things and abandon some WIPs, but this is a fantastic story. :)

Introducing yet another character into the mix - Honey. I didn't feel like I learnt a lot about her, but I doubt the House Elf will be a main character. She did give the plotline a boost as it gives Jo direction to go. That was good, and a lot more effective than Jo just deciding to take that route.

There was a mistake or two, I think I remember seeing the word 'loose' instead of 'lose'. Nothing major, and there's no point in saying anymore about it.

I really enjoyed this story, and can't wait to go and read some more of your work!

Have a great Christmas, and leave some Mince Pies out tonight!

Santa

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Review #6, by Santa Claus III

23rd December 2011:
Guess who! It's Santa!

I loved the start of this chapter! It was fantastic how you began with the first two paragraphs!

I love the fact that with this, we are learning more and more about the characters in each chapter. But you manage to slot it into appropriate situations, opposed to just telling the reader.

The ending of this chapter has left me wanting to start the next one straight away, so you might end up with another review today... :P

The only annoying thing about this story is that I can't find anything to criticise! I feel like I'm terrible for not leaving improvements, but I just love the way that this story's written! :D

MERRY CHRISTMAS!

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Review #7, by Santa Claus II

21st December 2011:
Hello again!

Sorry for the gap, I've had such a busy couple of days!

This chapter was brilliant! :) There was little advancement in the plot, but you introduced the character's a lot more in this chapter. We learnt a bit about the dynamics of the girls in their dorm, and a bit about Fenrir and Jo from a teachers perspective, which was a really interesting viewpoint to have. I'm glad you slotted that section into the story. :)

There's not a lot I can say about this chapter- there is even less to say in the way of improvements. Hopefully I can give you some more feedback in Santa's next gift, which will be a lot sooner! :)

Merry Christmas!
From Santa

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Review #8, by Santa Claus I

19th December 2011:
Santa's here! + bearing gifts!

I'm almost upset to say that I've never read much of your work before, but thank goodness I have now!

You have a really nice writing style, and everything seems to flow so well. The plot is quite different to anything I've read before- although I'm not a Fenrir story fan. Well, I wasn't, but I may have to read more now... :D

One thing I did notice is that whenever Fenrir talks, he addresses Jo by name. In prolonged conversations, it becomes apparent and maybe that's something that you could fix with a quick edit?

Merry Christmas!

Author's Response: *dances through strewn wrapping paper that somehow ended up in the Unanswered Review box*

SQUEE! Thanks so much for the review... whomever you are! *shaking with anticipation* :D I'm glad you liked it, and I'll go ahead and edit that so it's smoother. Thanks so much for the CC and the gift! :D

Annie


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Review #9, by Giola I

24th October 2011:
Hey Annie!

I am here, finally, with your review. I am SO sorry about the wait...but I'll try and make up for it!

I love your writing. I've told you this before, but it's just so easier to read. The mix of prose and dialogue is perfect, and you pull off description without sounding like you're trying too hard, which is nice to see since description is hard to pull off.

I love this so far. Jo/Josephine is an intriguing character, and I'm interested to learn more about her past and how exactly she learnt Fenrir's scret.

And that brings me to Fenrir. I love stories that fill in missing canon moments, and this whole era is a pretty massive gap the JKR left fairly free for us to play in, so I automatically love it :) It's interesting to see your portrayal of Fenrir, I have a hard time imagining him as anything other than the monster we see in the series, but you may just convince me that he had a more human side in his youth yet. I certainly commend you for thinking of such an idea, it's very creative.

A lovely story so far, you've got a good cast of characters and, I'm sure, a lot of subplots waiting to spring forth. I can't think of anything to critique...so take that as a compliment :D

Well done!

-Giola

Author's Response: Thanks Julia for the awesome review! (h)

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Review #10, by Akussa III

5th August 2011:
Yay, a new chapter!!

I really love this story and the way it moves forward. It had been a while since I read the frist two chapters but I fell back into the story very quickly; it was like a very comfortable surrounding so, great job!

I have to congratulate you on the opening two paragraphs. They are particularily well written and haunting; it is a wonderful way to give the reader an idea of what is coming. I love the characters you are creating here as well. All of them, even Fenrir who really isn't a favorite of, well, anyone considering what he will become. They are all very interesting and engaging and they work well together; their interactions are so much fun to read!

Congrats on the nice flow as well as the very clean writting and please keep this up, I can't wait to read more!!

Akussa (Gryffindor)

Author's Response: Thanks so much for another wonderful review and I'm glad you liked it! The beginning paragraphs of chapters are always my favorites, but they always keep me worried because they're not exactly related to the story directly. It's more of a roundabout way of being related :) Thanks so much,
Annie


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Review #11, by daliha II

5th August 2011:
I really like this story and I'll go on to the next chapter :P And the line "What exactly is a lie?" Still has me thinking. I mean being in Jo's position must be difficult. Wanting to help a friend but not knowing. I'm intrigued to know more about Fernir and what triggers him to become the cruel wolf we all know.

Author's Response: Thanks so much! Sometimes I really wonder if I would be able to handle the knowledge that Jo has because it seems stressful, but I think Jo is someone who deals with it in her own ways... well, maybe! I never really know anything about my characters, as they kind of grow beyond what I know them as. Thanks for the review,
Annie


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Review #12, by daliha I

4th August 2011:
It's one of the few pieces I've read that features Greyback. It's refreshing. I like how the main characters so far are Slytherins. I like how you protray Greyback and I already want to see more of him.

Author's Response: Thanks! I just updated and plan to post another chapter soon, so this story is getting back to being active now! :D There isn't much with Fenrir, but I love what I've read and had tow rite him myself! :)
Annie


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Review #13, by Nightshade III

29th July 2011:
This is so good, I like the story so far and I can't wait for more.
I wouldn't wake her up, by the way, I'm like that myself and if it is a bad day it can go rather unwell if anyone tries to wake me up.
I always hated Fenrir, but now I'm starting to like him, that's odd. Helps to not see it from Harrys POV I guess and now he is younger ofc.
Like it very much!

Author's Response: Thanks so much for the review, and I don't think I would wake her up either! It was scary just writing it, hehe!
I think Fenrir is really interesting, because he is so creepy and evil, but I guess there is always more than one side to a character. Thanks so much, and I can't wait to update this!
Annie


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Review #14, by DarkLadyofSlytherin III

29th July 2011:
Hey Annie!

I read this just as I promised. I don't think I noticed the grand total of two sentences you changed, but that could be just cause I am tired.

I want you to know that I really like this plot and I rather like the fact that the characters are not from the Hogwarts era. That they are from before that. I really like that one of the characters if Fenrir.

Now, I'm curious to know what is going on with this case. Its rather confusing and intriguing. So I'm thrilled to see who it is. It'll be (I'm sure) amazing.

I'll bug you some more for the next chapter some times next week.

Tootles,
Len

Author's Response: *hugs favorite evil sandwich of all time* Hehe, thanks for the review and it is neither short nor crappy! And that is perfectly fine that you didn't see them, so I guess it means I hid them well?

And YAY! I told you this would be short and crappy. But thanks for the review! I do appreciate it even though this brilliant response doesn't show it...

Annie


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Review #15, by tydemans II

8th July 2011:
Arimanthy as a tie to the Dark Arts - interesting. I look forward to see where you take that.

As you said, not much plot advancement, but a look at the characters. You're juggling a lot here, but they feel like they all have their place. My only suggestion is to watch Lawrence/Wren. When an author uses two names interchangeably in narration, it can sometimes read like two different people.

Tense shifts can be distracting. Whatever you decide, I'd suggest being consistent.

Haha, great last line there!

Take care,
~Ty

Author's Response: Thanks again for the helpful review and the Laurence./Wren tip is something I will definitely have to work on, as I hadn't thought about it, but now that you bring it up I can see exactly what you mean! And the tenses... that was really fun to hammer out, but I shall go back and fix them all! :)
Annie


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Review #16, by tydemans I

8th July 2011:
Hey, remember me? I said I'd be slow, but even I didn't think I'd be this slow. Please forgive the wait :)

I love the premise here - even Fenrir was human once. I'm intrigued to read your take on how he turned against wizard society and started his mission to overtake them - becoming the monster 'he so despises'.

One thing I noticed with the dialogue was the characters announcing the names of the people they were speaking to directly. For me, that seems unnatural when it goes beyond an initial greeting. The first paragraph with Laurence was great, there was a point to his use of 'Jo' in getting her attention and winding her up, but you loose a little of the charm of that exchange when characters through the rest of the chapter overuse the names. I can also see if you intended that type of speech pattern for Fenrir - in a way it does demonstrate his nervousness, maybe, to reassure himself, using Jo's name constantly when they were alone in the closet. In that case, you might think about limiting the pattern to his speech, or again, you'll lessen the impact.

OK, that was rambly, what I mean to say is maximize your impact. You have some great things going and you want to make them pop out.

Favorite line: "The rest of the world doesn't know Josephine; she is a different person."

I'm off to chapter two and will also be sending a PM with detailed notes, as promised. I haven't forgotten that ;)

Take care!
~Ty

Author's Response: Ahh, I do remember you! I can't forget, and I think I have you beat for being slow, so no worries at all! Especially not when you had such a helpful review! :D Hehe (I am terrible at responses, but I do appreciate this an unbelievable amount!) I shall keep all of that in mind when going over this chapter with edits and writing new stuff! :D
Annie


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Review #17, by caomoyl II

7th June 2011:
ANNIE! Wow..I started the last review like that..Anyways, I loved this chapter too!! I was really expecting Jo to tell Professor Waskruski about Fenrir..but then she didn't =O *runs off to Gmail*

Author's Response: Muahaha! You never can know (actually, I don't even know!) what Jo is going to do, do you? :) Thanks dear and have a super week! :D

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Review #18, by caomoyl I

7th June 2011:
ANNIE! Amy loves this so far!! And you know I suck at reviews so having your wifey love it should be enough ;P =D But I is going to read the rest now because I'm not going back to school until 1 (YAY) and I really can't wait =D

Author's Response: A review from my wifey is the best thing of all! :D And YAY for getting to read more! I might be gone, so just leave me comments. :) Thanks for the review dear! :D

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Review #19, by Cleopatraa II

25th May 2011:
Seeing as I like Fenrir ( I know weird he) and you said itís your best story I had to read this story. I also just plainly love minor characters. I actually never thought of Fenrir going to Hogwarts before you know and I have never read it before either. Itís nice to see him so human he kinda reminds me of a darker version of Remus Lupin in this story. You know itís kinda weird seeing as most people think heís a monster and always has been a monster for you to portray him to be so human kudos to that and I def agree with you putting him in Slytherin. The only negative thing I have to mention is that you put a lot of many new characters at once but so I couldnít remember all of them but perhaps that just means I have a sucky memory. Also Jo is such a great OC. She seems very realistic to me actually all of the characters do. I know I should stop rambling but I have to say great story!

-xoxox-

Cleopatraa

Author's Response: Now weird at all! Fenrir is pretty awesome, if I do say so myself! Or at least he is an interesting character! Also, thanks so much for the CC! I really appreciate having feedback like that for writing this story! Thanks so much for the review,
Annie


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Review #20, by Akussa II

23rd May 2011:
Hi again!!

Well this is what I was talking about previously; no need to introduce so many characters all at once when you can write a perfecly necessary introductory chapter like this one!! I think, therefore, you could really take out some info in the previous chapter to make it less heavy and either add it in this one or just let go of it because there are some repetitions in here anyway!

I really like the characters you are creating; they are all original and fit well together. I can't wait to learn more about them and the way they complete each other.

Once again, this chapter appeared spotless in spelling, kudos! Great work overall, a nice chapter that has definitly gotten me hooked; please keep on writing, I really want to know more!

Akussa

Author's Response: Hi again to you! :D

I'll get on editing the first chapter and I'm happy that you think this one worked to even out all the spaces where there were too many characters in Chapter 1! Yay for no spelling and grammar mistakes! All of my English teachers would be proud! New chapter coming soon and thanks again for the amazing reviews! :)

-Annie


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Review #21, by Akussa I

23rd May 2011:
Hi!

This is such an interesting and original idea, I love it! I like how you are willing to take risk and already, in the opening chapter, you give the emotion and complexity this story needs.

The characters seem interesting enough altough, to be fair, I'm not so sure I remember them all corectly; some of them might have melted together at some point. I think you introducted too many in this chapter; maybe you can let one or two a bit more in the dark and introduce them properly in the next chapter? Just an idea in order to lighten the information dumping of this opening chapter.

I did enjoy Jo a lot and absolutly love the dialogues and interractions between the characters. It is very well done and gives this chapter a lot of energy.

I hope the rest will be just as enjoyable and original! Great work so far, you've got me very interested!

Akussa

Author's Response: Hi Akussa! :D

Thank you so much and I'm really glad the risky beginning seemed to pay off, as it wasn't exactly something I'm used to doing in stories. :)

The next chapter goes through and gets everyone a little better introduced, but I have been working on getting the characters to be more clear and separate from each other, so hopefully that will be edited in soon.

Thanks for the review and all the great work you've don in May! The authors really appreciate your dedication! :)
-Annie


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Review #22, by LilyFire I

14th May 2011:
Hiya, Lily here with your review.
I really like Fenrir here, though we don't really see much of him. The other characters I like, and I can already see the different personalities they have. Jo is a great OC. You can get a real feel for her character, and I didn't see any mary-sue-ness at all. Great job! Feel free to rerequest.
~LilyFire

Author's Response: Thanks for the review and yay for no Mary-Sue-ness! She's one of my favorite characters and it's always a challenge to make sure she comes off in the manner I'm wanting her to, but I'm glad she seems to be doing well right now! :)

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Review #23, by BrightStar II

27th March 2011:
Hey! I'm really glad I came back from the chapter. You're right, this is more about characters than plot but I think that needs to be done, and you do it well! The language and tone you use is perfectly suited to the story, this kind of fic obviously suits your writing! Well done, hope you keep writing it! :D

Author's Response: Thanks, and I am so glad you liked it! :D I really enjoy writing it this way, so it is nice to know that it's fairly specific style fits the story! :D
-Annie


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Review #24, by TenthWeasley II

19th March 2011:
I can't quite describe what I'm about to say, so bear with me. :D

When I read a story, I see colours - I'm 99% sure I have this weird condition that I won't explain, but it causes me to see numbers with personalities and other things (like foods, stories, etc.) are seen in colours. For example, chapter thirteen of Leaping Obstacles is a blue/gray chapter, whereas chapter twelve is brown, blue, and green. I can't explain it!

Your story, and this chapter in particular, gives me this beautiful image - dark purple and blue interspersed with a gray mist. It's haunting and beautiful, and slightly twisty in your style and descriptions. I ADORE reading it - it seems elegant and romantic, which I can imagine is extremely difficult to pull off in a Fenrir story, of all things! It flows like music and water, and is such a joy to read.

The ending bit, though - I WANT TO READ MORE BECAUSE OF IT! You've got amazing talent for ending chapters on cliffies that just leave me hungry for more. All I can say now is please update soon! I love reading your work, it's so romantic and smooth. :D If that makes any sense! And if it doesn't, just take it as a compliment. :P

Laff you, Annie dear!

Author's Response: JAYNE!

This response is so overdue, but I'm cleaning out my review box, so I shall finally answer this review of awesome!

Ooh! I do know what you're talking about! I have a friend who sees the colours with the reading and I do know what you mean by that! The description of this chapter sounds really beautiful and the way you described it is exactly what I am going for!

Hehe, new chapter today! I have 4 more on backlog that really need some editing love, but I'll get to work with the updates soon! :)

Thanks Jayne so very very much for your amazing review! :D
-Annie


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Review #25, by SexyDoorFrames I

19th March 2011:
Oh! A Fenrir story! This is so interesting and it's actually my first one! Which is wonderful because everything is so fresh. Now that I think about it, Fenrir is such an interesting character! I always thought he was just a character than liked chomping on people, so it's nice to see you're going through the depths of his character and making him human. I like Jo and her interactions will all the characters. You introduce her enough to let me understand her but not too much that I feel like I know everything so I'm still really interested in her.

In all, excellent first chapter :)

Author's Response: Yay for Fenrir stories! Hehe, I really love this and I feel honored to be your first! Hopefully it will live up to Fenrir's amazingness! :D Jo is one of my favorite OCs and I am glad you like how she is introduced, as that was one thing I really experimented with in this chapter. Thank you so much for the review, and I hope one day in a future swap I'll get to read more of your stories! :D
-ginger


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