I've read this before but I'm just now posting a review.

As far as parodies go, this one is fantastic. It really dramatizes the overly-done Rose/Scorpius pairing (not that I don't like the pairing, but I feel like that's everyone's favorite just because Ron dissed Scorpius in the epilogue).

You really have parodies down to a science, I think. It was overly-exaggerated in some parts - the exploding Astoria, the rhinestone suit - but not so overly-exaggerated as to where the story was so ridiculous you felt embarrassed to be reading it. I love the idea of the Tower of Love and the way you describe it is fantastic. It sort of leaves you breathless, like entering a big city for the first time and seeing all the lights and cars and people. I like the idea of the next generation being a bunch of wild childs, almost like they're saying "my parents are famous, and I'll never live up to killing the Dark Lord or fighting in the most legendary battle of our time so instead I'll just drink and party and have a good time."

All in all, just . . . fantastic. (:

Author's Response: What I find funny about this oneshot is that I never would've guessed that I'd end up using this exaggerative humor so much in the WIPs I write now. It's kind of like ~the first one~ that would foreshadow the rest.

The Tower of Love is Broadway and Vegas smooshed together, with the very best sequins and feather boas the two have got to offer. There was originally a song and dance, but unfortunately can't have those in non-song fics. And obviously, after the war, the only interesting thing that ever happens at Hogwarts are the Weasleys' dating lives 8D

♥

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OMG this was the best thing ever. I'm dramatically laughing my ass off at the moment.
Best line in my opinion "until she remembered she could breathe through her nose."
I love it :D

Author's Response: Bahaha thanks! Glad you enjoyed the crazy 8D

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All right, I was tired of having my heart broken, so I decided to go for a change of pace. I think I was successful in that goal.

You are ridiculous. And I love it.

There's no way I'm going to be able to sit here and discuss this seriously, so while I won't pull it apart and talk about characterization (except for Scorpius, who is divine) I think I'll just go ahead and list a incomplete list of everything that made me laugh: (note: incomplete because otherwise I'd have to copy paste the whole thing and that would be problematic)

It starts off with a Jane Austen parody. You know it's going to be good.

"Rose knew exactly what she was wanted: concupiscence — lust of the wildest, fieriest, and most-consuming kind. " Lord almighty.

"I have to figure out who is our year's trio. You know, the one with the jokester comic relief, the dreadfully shy and smart one, and the dark, brooding one with character depth. Like the Marauders." "The Marauders weren't a trio," he corrected. "There were four of them." long quote is long but this was brilliant so.

Then Scorpius is in a rhinestone suit with his dramatic backstory in the Tower of Love. I can't.

""I'm related to half the school. Anyone I'm not cousins with is already twice as attractive." Weasley problems.

This is the silliest, most wonderful story ever. I'm actually sitting here with a smile on my face. It is a parody and it is fabulous and everything about it is great. Sometimes you really just need to write or to read something silly and fun. You're definitely a very versatile author - you manage to go back and forth between serious and light hearted and you juggle that very well, which is admirable.

This is the last of the reviews for today's gift, but I'll be back in one form or another! (how mysterious)

-vanishes in puff of smoke-

Author's Response: YOU CAN'T GO WITH A BIGGER CHANGE OF PACE THAN RHINESTONE-JACKETED SCORPIUS WiTH SHOWTUNES :D He is divine. He is fabulous. He is the complete package.

It ain't love unless it causes third-degree burns.

Duuuh Rose knows; hot boys come in a convenient assortment of personalities (like holiday chocolates) so if you don't like coconut, you can go for the raspberry truffle~

The most hilarious bit about rereading this story for me is actually seeing how much bits of this story has made it into my actual WIPs, with Scorpius and his terrible fashion and Anastasia became Apostrophe and so on xD

♥ Until next time mysterious Hippogriff!

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HAHAHAHA, you had me in hysterics!
This is probably the best crack fic I've come across in a LONG time (too long to think about; I consider it on par (if not OVER par) with Puzzling Prattlings of a Pulchritudinous Potions Professor :D)
Scorpius' rhinestones were just fantastic! I absolutely adore the Scorpius in here. This is my ideal Scorpius, dripping with gooey charm and spanked with dazzling rhinestones!
Phenomenal piece of writing! Once again, you prove that there is no genre you can't ace.

Author's Response: I can't deny the crack in my blood. To think this began with gubby mentioning the word concupiscence, and I was 'what' and she explained it meant lust and i was, once again, going 'what'. Scorpius in rhinestones is the best Scorpius 8D I THINK THIS STARTED MY SCORPIUS WEARS TERRIBLE CLOTHING PHASE. Definitely a cousin of velvet-blazered Scorpius of Capers.

♥!

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Just as a general, I don't like parodys.
They're not Sirius enough (tehehe) and have no substance.
This, however, is an exception. Because of one amazing moment...
Draco's affair with himself. Made me fall of my chair and reread this three times. Hilarious!
You should do more parodys.

Author's Response: Bahaha, I'm glad Draco has pulled you in 8D Of all the hoopla over Draco's love interests, none will ever hold a candle to himself. Here's to narcissism!

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i love it! I almost died of laughter at the part where Scorpius is on the piano in a sparkly suit!!! Or Draco being in love with himself hahahahhaah! Pure genius!

Author's Response: Hee, glad you enjoyed it ^__^ Thank you!

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Wow. Wow. You're so good at writing humour. This is one of the best parody i have ever read. I am so glad I have decided to read everything in your author's page. It gets better and better with each story and one-shots. I absolutely loved this one-shot. I couldn't stop laughing. So, thank you

Author's Response: I've got so much crack running amok on my author's page, hehe. Glad you liked it! ^__^

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Bahaha fun
Scorpie declares his deep love for Rose and she just responds with 'let's get to the ** already.' (Yeah, kinda misquoted, but anything to keep the languige 12+ right?) Who would've thought Scorpius had more feelings than Rose? And more style, even if he did end up with a vendetta against bad feng shui, haha. Moreover, he has a rhinestone jacket.

Dazzling.

Somehow this fic reminded me of Chicago (the musical); it has a piano and lots of glittering people (search youtube for the song 'Razzle Dazzle'!)

Oh joy. Sometimes when you read a fic you think 'yeah right, clich'e' but this was so over the top that it was funny.
I'm still laughing, and scrolling up every five seconds to reread bits.

I'll spare you the other thousand quotes I could've put here, because obviously you wrote the things I would quote so it's not really adding anything to this review.
So I should shut up and post this already.

PS By the way, you're not rid of me yet (if that's not an English expression, blame Google Translate.) I reread etc this morning (and saw the things you drew, it's MARVELLOUS), and I've got to keep admiring your wordchoice, plus ability to squeeze a plot in there too. WAAA CLIFFHANGER

Author's Response: Bahaha this fic is so silly. It is always the brooding man who has the most feelings. All the repressed feelings that burst out right as the heroine walks in, of course.

/so dazzling/

omg yes! I was totally channeling Chicago the entire time I was writing the Astronomy Tower. Hee, and all the next gen cliches of course. And then there are just so many inside jokes in here, I don't even know.

♥ thanks :3 next chapter etc. is getting done, but I've got a busy week ahead, so I'm not sure when I can finish the rest. sooon.

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This is hilarious! well done, really! I laughed so hard, at all of it.
I gotta say, my favorite part was the beginning:
"She was very plain looking, nothing like the other beautiful girls of Ravenclaw. What were dewy skin, curly auburn locks, and a slim physique? Bah, nothing!" Ahem everyficever ahem.
A close second was the part where Al says that all the guys are fit, and the part about the trios. SO FUNNY!!
keep writing, I'm in awe of your talent. Even your joke stuff is amazing.
Love,
Louise

Author's Response: Hee, thank you. It's so very silly, but I'm glad you like it! :D Ahh, the strange next gen world where everyone is gorgeous, even the ugly people!

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I was even giggling at the author's comments. A line I particularly loved; "You're seventeen. Your biological clock is ticking." Which may not seem all that funny, but had me in almost-hysterics. Your writing style is wonderful. Really.

Author's Response: Hee thank you! :D

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This fic's title made me want to laugh out loud. 'Concupiscence' goes right up on my *imaginary* list of ironically-named words, right there next to 'ecdysiast'. (Doesn't that sound like some type of doctor? My friend told me it was a nicer way to say stripper. Just imagine it--"Grandma, I'm an ecdysiast! I have a doctorate in concupiscence!" "Why, that's very nice, dear.") Oh, the joy. xD

This was such a great parody; I love all the allusions I found... you're just drawing the from all over the place, aren't you? Even the mention of Game. xD

You captured my next-gen pet peeves so well! Of course it would be a dilemma for Rose, as a single goody two-shoes, to find a boyfriend within this sea of fit Next-gen blokes, y'know? So naturally she had to hook up with Scorpius, the one who she always reminded herself, without fail, that she hated with a fiery passion, because real life is always littered with banter and sexual tension. It just all makes sense! I feel so enlightened! (Sadly, this is the plot of a lot of poorly written Next-gens.)

Oh look, you even addressed the main Marauder pet peeve: Peter does exist, y'know. And the broom closets and Heads' common room and Draco's narcissism and piano!Louis...! ♥ Gah, this review doesn't make much sense, but I think part of my brain has melted into a sticky purple puddle of awesome goo. So thank you for bearing with me.

And I now want a lame rhinestone-clad Scorpius to ride off into the sunset with on levitating imitation throw pillows, with a fireworks explosion of Al's girlfriends as our backdrop. Um, yeah.

-SS

Author's Response: Oh, oh my. Perhaps Scorpius has some ecdysiasts on his stage ;D

YOU CAUGHT THE MENTION OF GAME! That is exactly how cracky this fic is; when I make references to my own fics.

And there are /so many/ fit blokes. Too many! It's a wonder that Hogwarts isn't churning out models every other day. But all of them lack personality except the one she hates, ofc.

Hee, I couldn't resist the Marauder jab; it was actually one of the first bits I wrote and I couldn't decide whether to go Marauders or next-gen parody.

♥ A firework explosion of Al's girlfriends. I might just actually have to add that in 8D

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I think if I was going to pick one person in the world to write a parody type fic I think I would pick you - when reading anything you write I generally feel like I'm being taken on a ride of wit as your writing literally just drips with it. Its like liquid sarcasm condensed into words... and I love it.

Because of that I think you're the perfect person to write something like this - as your writing naturally comes chocker-block with mocking and that sort of tone already... so yeah, it works so well.

I love the first line and concupiscence are just so brilliant witty... and I especially love the last bit. Your choice of words is just so perfect to make it hillarious and wonderful and witty.

Okay, I'm done now :D

-AC

Author's Response: Bahaha! What a way to describe that xD But thank you! It's really a rather old silly fic that I haven't really edited, but I'm glad you liked it ^__^

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Good story. It is kind of funny how even thought this was meant as a joke, it has about the same plot line as many stories. Not to say that I don't like those stories, its just when it comes right down to it the plot is a little ridiculous. By the way i love the last line rose says.

Author's Response: Bahaha, yes. I always thought it's a bit silly to see so many stories centered around a girl finding a boyfriend, or obsessing over boys (essentially, anyhow), like it's the biggest thing in the world. Always in their seventh year too ;D

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I've got to say, that was hilarious to read!
I mean ... "Hit it, Lou"
That was so lame I had to laugh out loud :D (not that it was written badly, but because Scorpious was too theatrical in some way)

10/10!

Author's Response: Thanks! :D Theatrical Scorpius is the best. He gets showgirls even though he's so lame.

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This fic was hilarious. And concupiscence sounds like such an un-lustly word. This story was probably one of the best parodies I have read so far, and I love it. I also love that on the banner it says "This is a banner of no relevance." :D

Author's Response: Thanks :D It's a super old banner; I was thinking of making a banner parody too, but I wasn't quite sure what to do at the time, so I stuck on that tagline xD perfect!

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I loved the Narcissus reference and Draco. Twas hilarious.

Author's Response: Heh, thanks! :D

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"It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single girl in her seventh year, must be in want of a bloke." I shall start with this... I fell in love with it as soon as I read these words, not just cause it was Jane Austen but the fact that it is a Rose Weasley parody of Jane Austen's awesomeness.

"Not knowing how to begin her search, she decided to first consult Albus about blokes he knew. He was on the Quidditch pitch with Anastasia who, despite her lack of hand-anything coordination, was also on the team." Turns to Albus? I mean that is really amusing, also the fact that Anastasia is terrible at quidditch but is still on the team. Great choice by Al. :)

And Scorpius, the Tower of Love? That was so amusing, just the fact that he is the one with dating advice, I mean it's Scorpius! I love it! "You can make an exception for her," said a smooth voice. Scorpius peeked out from the curtains behind Susie and gave a wink to Rose. "Can't say no to a redhead." Hehehe, redheads, Oh how I now love you for using that in the story (is not a redhead but wants to be) it's just brilliant! And the bickering between Rose and Scorpius, how he brushes it all off until she complains about the rhinestones.

I think the best bit was that Draco was having an affair with himself! I was laughing for 10 minutes, tears running down my face.

It was such a good parody and it made me laugh more then I have in a very long time, it was just amazing and funny and light hearted and something I am so glad I read. :) You are amazing at writing!

Author's Response: Eee, thank you so much for your reviews! :) I'm very excited to see them ^__^

Bahah, I love that line more now that you declare it like that. "A Rose Weasley parody of Jane Austen's awesomeness."

I swear, there are so many OCs who are bad at Quidditch and yet -- END UP ON QUIDDITCH TEAMS xD And thus, Anastasia!

Scorpius is suave! He knows how to sell it, literally. And well, he obviously descended from someone who was quite vain himself, to put it lightly ;D

Thank you very much!

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:flails a gazillion times: Wicked! Brilliant! 10 stars! Two thumbs Up! etc. I'm picking my stomach off the floor, I laughed so much!!! Let's see if I can get my fingers a-typin'

"Concupiscence" has got to be the most unattractive word for "lust" in the English language! I don't even know where to start except to say I absolutely adore reading your fics because your sense of humor is totally like mine and I love that because it's weird, it's zany and it's intelligent with a bit of slapstick sometimes attached to it.

I have never really gotten into the whole ScoRose thing so this piece is perfect for me. It seems overdone to me at all time.

Loved the part where Scorpius explains why he wears a rhinestone suit--or to put it more accurately, doesn't explain.

"I'm related to half the school. Anyone I'm not committing incest with is already twice as attractive."

"Be pureblood. It's easier." - Bwhahahahaaha!!! How many times have I had that thought? I always felt completely inappropriate but it's so true sometimes!!!

Oh, and of course you have to have Scorp shirtless in the end--tee-hee, abs, tee hee.

charlottetrips [Ravenclaw]

Author's Response: Hee, thanks! Ah parodies, when the nuttiness really comes out and the filters go out the window. SLAPSTICK HUMOR, BTW, IS THE BEST THING EVER :3

I've never been for or against Scorose, but for some reason, I just really like to write them either 1) not together 2) really ridiculously xD

OH GOD, I DO! Scorpius is like, shirtless everywhere. It's chronic. And I very much approve of it.

♥

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I was going to read something with less reviews. Really, I was, but I just couldn't pass this one up. I /love/ a good parody, and this my friend, is a good parody.

There were so many little references that made me giggle, but my favorite line was definitely:

"The Marauders weren't a trio," he corrected. "There were four of them."

Rose rolled her eyes. "I think I can count, Al."

YES! My biggest fanfic pet peeve is when people write Marauder's fics and just ignore the fact that Peter existed. Seriously. He may have turned out to be a traitorous coward, but he was still a Marauder.

Anyway, sorry, back to your story. This was really brilliant. You managed to include so many cliches while still keeping a semblance of a plot line, and that's pretty impressive in and of itself.

I'm so glad your wrote this. It's absolutely hilarious :)

~Singularity
(Ravenclaw)

Author's Response: Parody love ♥

THAT WAS ACTUALLY ONE OF THE FIRST LINES THAT BEGAN THE PARODY! :D It all just formed around that. Odd starting place, I know, and completely irrelevant to the rest of the parody xD

Thanks muchly for the review!

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This is bloody hilarious. I've read Pride and Prejudice, and to be honest, you've captured the same humour surrounding Mr Collins in this snappy story. I actually can't stop giggling. The part about Draco Malfoy.. Narcissus inspired? You're utterly brilliant!

Author's Response: Glad you liked it ^__^ Hee, I don't think I'm worthy of such allusion-filled praise! Thank you!

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hahaha this was hilarious, and ridiculously dramatic which made it even funnier! Pretty much just loved how dramatic everything was, Scorpius' rhinestone suit, they torn up place, Rose's declaration/demand/thingy at the end :P haha awesome stuff :D

Author's Response: It's crack to the max :D! Oh next gen, what -can't- it do?

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I thought I was all parodied-out after reading endless entries for the Worst Story Ever Challenge, but this story has changed my mind. This was awesome. Super awesome. I laughed aloud several times (But it's okay because I'm home alone.) I love the incorporation of those terrible 'good girl goes bad' plot devices. I despise most of them, so thank you. I am forever indebted.

Author's Response: Oh hullo! It's nice to see one of your reviews again :D

i'm glad you like it ^__^ I always thought that many parodies never really touched upon next-gen specific cliches as much, so I really had fun with this one!

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OH Gina! So crazy you are. :) This was so funny, and I rather enjoyed seeing you drop two WHOLE F words. I giggled so much!

LOVE YEW

ash

Author's Response: Snerk, YOU'RE THE CRAZY ONE. Silly Ash >:D Or we're a pair of crazies.

LOVE YOU MORE.

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P.S. If you can find it in ya, more parodies, please?

Author's Response: Possibly ^__^ I do quite a bit of cliche zinging in my other stories as well, juts not so blatant like in Concupiscence. I must be good and stick to my WIPs xD

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I feel like my brain has melted into a large gooey, probably very sour tasting, in fact so sour that if you took a large spoonful and ate it your eyes would begin to twitch and your lips would pucker so durastically they'd be completely sucked backwards into your mouth and you'd swallow them, puddle of giddiness.

I read it twice. The first time through everytime I read the word CONCUPISCENCE I read CONSPICUOUS instead. Cue confusion.

Why yes, I did have to look up how to spell conspicuous. And yes, I always accidentally spell the word psychic like physic. How'd ya know?

ANYWAYS, that was so stinking delightful. If I could give it a rating of 30 gazillion/10 I surely would, but alas I don't know how many zeroes 30 gazillion contains and they only allow me to go up to 10. Sad day for Gracie.

There were a plenty of side splitting/knee slapping lines in there, but strangely enough the one that really got me was, ehem, "It's Scorpius. I hate him. But... I saw him today. He says he's in love with me. And now there's this feeling in my heart I can't explain." It was so perfectly Nicholas Sparksy lame and fluffy and unbelievably ridiculous.

This was life changingly epic, I want inside your brain. I bet it, too, would taste delightfully sour.

I laughed, I cried, I lost fifteen pounds!

I applaud and worship you.

Huzzah!

Author's Response: Is this a love letter? 8D I feel like it is, with your adoring description of brain mush ♥

(Totally understandable. I still see Conspicuous myself xD)

Teehee, SCOR LOVES HER, it should be enough to mend everything and anything. Cure cancer! Save a kitten! Prepare a perfect steak! That is the power of true love.

(hmm, Concupiscence diet plan?)

Your review is much much love, so many giggles galore :D

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