I'm not usually one for slash, but this was very good. Very well done, very well written and it flowed beautifully. :)Author's Response: Thank you so much! It's not my first attempt at a slash fic, but it's the only one I've ever liked enough to put up. Thank you very much for the review! ♥ Report Review
This was amazing ♥ I loved the characterisations of Draco and Theo. It was such a refeshing story to read because of the different outlook that you gave to Theo, yet you still sounded canon. I really loved this and I think, even though you don't need it, a sequel of some sort would be awesome ♥Author's Response: I must admit that I only wanted to write this ship because of the ship name - /HMS bad boy babies/, haha! Glad you liked it - I've been tempted to write more, but I feel like three WIPs is enough to be going with already XD thank you for reviewing! ♥ Report Review
Argh... sorry, not on the fic, my pc just erased my whole review.
I don't read a lot of Draco-slash, never read a lot of Draco and never read Theo or Draco/Theo, but now I've read this I know I should do more reading of that!
"He was the son of one of the most distinguished and oldest Death Eaters, for Merlin's sake, and Draco was too." That something I really wanted to point out to you, 'cause it's not the truth in fact. Theo was - although I always felt like Nott Sr. was his grand dad due to ages. But the Malfoys joined Lordy Voldy later. They're devoted to Lordy Voldy, but they don't belong to the oldest DE's if I remember well.
The story flowed well, nothing to remark - it was a bit unclear in the middle when you suddenly forwarded a couple of years, but nothing to really worry about. The story flowed well so no problems with that either. I liked the sad ending. I was like: if it know gets a happy ending I'm going to kill the writer - but I didn't have to! Yay! I wouldn't have killed you, just forced you to make it sad.
Draco gets portrayed so well... he doesn't get softened up. He doesn't change. Theo was a bit more difficult to judge as there aren't really any clues about how he's like except the fact that he's a bit of a loner - or am I thinking of the wrong person here? Probably... sounds like me! x)
Err... I feel like I'm forgetting something... I really don't remember. Probably wasn't important.
Good job, darling!
xOSBAuthor's Response: Ah, I hate it when computers eat reviews. Thank you for being so quick, though!
Ooh, I see. I completely forgot about that (and I call myself a 'Draco writer'!). Thank you very much for pointing that out. I think Nott Sr is definitely Theodore's dad though - JKR didn't give us much information on Theodore, but I definitely remember something about his father being older and a widower, and Theodore being able to see Thestrals. (yeah...I stare at the lexicon a bit too much).
Ooh, no need to force me to make it a sad ending - I love my sad, angsty endings (: I really didn't see this ending any other way anyway. I try to stick to canon wherever possible (except when I get my death eaters mixed up like I did here, eep) and, well, Draco marries Astoria. So it's unrequited, of course. Unrequited is the best.
Theodore is the one you're thinking of. Those are JKR's words exactly - he's a bit of a loner. Thank you for saying so about Draco, though.
And thank you so much for this review - I know you're a bit of a slash expert, so to speak, and I'm glad you liked it. Thank you for being so prompt as well! I'll definitely bear in mind those comments about the Malfoys - I write about them a lot. Thanks again!
♥ Report Review
Hello! Here with your review.
Never read anything about Theodore. Eager to. :D
Your opening is well done. I like how real he feels by being scared. The practice is neat. Even though you didn't write it out in full details, I could really see him standing there, talking to himself and such. Very real character.
Awww D: He just snatched them. I felt my heart sink a little. Poor guy. I mean...bad wants Voldy to win guy...poor Theo.
What is a CV?
I really like the change over. It was like this spark of his life, then you get into a more heavy scene. I really really like that you have them so downtrodden. It is real and now as I say this, I remember the story of yours that I read before with Draco/Astoria. :D Yeah, I read guys better. I find it hard to get into female sto- I'm rambling on, sorry!
Ouch! Draco going to trial, I love it!!
I like the way you wrote Draco. I can hear his words in that my father will hear about this tone of voice, which granted it more Tom Felton ringing in my ears, but since he plays the part so perfectly, I can't imagine Draco with any other voice than his. The point was...oh yeah, he feels spot on character!
Your ending was brilliant. It was cold and harsh and cruel and I loved every word of it! < = That sounded a bit twisted on read back. My thread does say I like unhappy endings. ^^
You asked about your flow...it was a bit middle ground for me. The * was a clear indicator and that kept it from ruining the flow. I feel like your strong suit is in the narrative. There's nothing wrong with your dialogue, I just prefer your narrative. It's lovely. So the flow, I'm sure that it could have been a tad smoother, but it didn't hang me up or make me stop and go Whoa what? :D
I said it earlier, I love your Draco. I always kinda falter a bit when presented with part of the main circle of characters (Trio, Ginny, Weasleys, Draco and such) because I'm really, really picky about canon. I feel satisfied completely. Draco seemed right on to me and I enjoyed this very much. :D --JennaAuthor's Response: Ooh, hi!
Ah, Theodore. Babe of my life, seriously, I need to write way more about him. He's the best minor character in the HPverse. Of course that's just my opinion (:
A CV is a Curriculum Vitae. It's basically what you had over when you apply for a job. Qualifications, addresses, previous jobs etc. Probably a bit of a Britishism there :$ I don't know what the American English equivalent is, but I do know that they are pretty nasty to write. You know, condensing yourself onto a page.
Downtrodden characters are like the loves of my life. I've got to stop writing so many, ahha! It's just fun to write about mopey, poor, whinging downtrodden people, for some reason.
Ohhh my, I'm so glad you said that. I find Draco increasingly hard to write. You'd think that practise would improve his characterisation, but he seems to get worse the more I write about him, argh. Glad he worked here, although granted his appearance was pretty brief (:
No worries, I like unhappy endings too ^^ says a bit about me, doesn't it? Liking downtrodden misery characters and unhappy endings. Erm, well.
Ahha, I find narrative much easier to write. Dialogue...it has a habit of sounding forced or stilted because, of course, unless you can fully get inside a character's head, you have no idea how they would speak. My dialogue does need some practise, I'll admit, to make it sound more natural - I think I've been told before that it's quite blunt and not really natural.
I falter when trying to write them, but I'm so obsessed with 'conquering' Draco's character, so to speak, that he crops up eventually in just about all of my stories. I've got to stop, ahha! Really pleased you like it though (:
Thank you very much for the review! (: Report Review
Aaw, so so cute. Message me at fanfiction(dot)net if this is ever continued? I would love to see what happens next. Maybe set after Draco gets out of Askaban? :)Author's Response: Ah, I never really thought of continuing this fic. In my mind, the whole Draco/Theodore ship is more of an 'unrequited love' thing, and this was a bit of a spontaneous one-shot :S Thank you very much for reviewing, and I'll make sure to let you know if I ever think of writing anymore (: Report Review
I do love a bit of Theodore/Draco, mainly because we pretty much know nothing about Nott and so who's to say he wasn't madly in love with Draco? Haha :D This was great, though - the plot was so simple, but you pulled it off brilliantly and made it completely your own, and the writing was to die for.
I loved this: He practised it when he was alone, letting the words roll off his tongue like anchors, lead weights. Practising pronunciation, emphasis, crafting elaborate sentences, exquisite prose, and then discarding them, shedding adjectives and adverbs until all he had were two pronouns, a verb, and a name.
Your characterisations of both Theodore and Draco were excellent, I thought - Theodore was both normal teenage boy and son of a Death Eater, and Draco was wonderfully true to canon. I also liked the inclusion of Tracey - she is canon, isn't she? I can't quite remember.
Anyway, just fantastic! I really enjoyed it :)Author's Response: Theodore Nott is basically just a huge babe of a character, and, yeah, what is to say he wasn't madly in love with Draco? A bit of slash here and there does no harm (:
Thank you very much! Ahha, I write Draco so much and so badly that I'm convinced if I just went through all my stories involving him and just changed his name to 'Gilbert' or something everyone would think I just had this vaguely racist OC called Gilbert. So it's good to hear he worked well here (:
Tracey Davis is canon to the extent she was on JKR's original classlist. Another favourite of mine (:
Thank you very much for the review!
PS. Report Review
I love Depeche Mode. Some of their songs are so moving. I don't believe I've listened to that one, though. If I have, I can't recall.
Like all your pieces, this was wonderful!
I absolutely loved how conflicted poor Theodore was. I can't imagine what it must be like to be in his position, but I could also imagine that it wouldn't be easy.
I think we've all been in that position where we like someone but we don't know what to do about it, so I think that Theodore is really rather easy to relate to and realistic in this piece. I also think that your characterization of Tracey was sweet, and your portrayal of Draco was stunningly accurate.
This was beautiful yet so tragic. We know that it isn't plausible for this ship to coexist within the realm of canon, but I was rooting for Theo. I do have a soft spot for him.
Your descriptions in this, too, were absolutely riveting. I loved them. I think my favorite was in the end where you compared Draco to wire. It was very original yet easy to picture within my mind's eye.
I can't help but feel bad for Theo still. He only got a kiss that lasted a moment, a kiss that was like ice. Though, I suppose that something is better than nothing.
LindersAuthor's Response: Linda! Good to hear from you again (:
Depeche Mode are an awesome band, yeah. Apart from Enjoy the Silence, I'd say Shake the Disease is my favourite. It's such a simple song with such a sparse texture, but it works really well.
I must say that it's a ship that attracted me for the utter impossibilities of it. Plus I do like the character of Theodore as he's got an interesting background - older, death eater father, dead mother and the ability to see Thestrals. Okay, I'm not going to lie, I actually chose this ship because it involved two of my favourites to write. Tracey's another one I like writing about (blank canvas minor character time!) so it was kind of ideal.
Oh, thank heavens vis-a-vis the Draco characterisation thing. I really struggle to write him well, so that's really good to know.
Strangely enough, I used that wire imagery/comparison thing in one of my pieces of english coursework. My teacher said it was a good bit of imagery, so I've kind of been angling to use it ever since. It seemed like an ample opportunity (:
Thank you very much for your review! Report Review
Terms of Service
categories & genres
short story collection