Oh my Rowling I am so, so, SO sorry these entries took me so long to get to, but you know RL gets in the way and you still love me right? Right :P
This was a really good story. I especially enjoyed your use of description.
You worked the quote in well and naturally. I appreciate that you entered my challenge and that you were patient with me!
You recieve 2nd place in my challenge! :) Report Review
Ooh, this was really nice. You set it off right away that it could have been a dream with the first sentence, which is a really lovely writing technique. It was sweet at first and then really sad. I really felt my heart go out to Hugo, even though I've never even heard of the pairing before.
This was beautifully written piece and has a lot more depth than the few words give it credit for. Just lovely.
DemAuthor's Response: Thanks so much for the review! I'm glad that you liked it! I think this is only the 4th fic on the archives that is a Hugo/Scorpius, but I really love the idea. Report Review
Hi! This is a lovely one shot. Very heartfelt and I like the twist in that it was all a dream. You write this very well- especially the descriptions. I can't really think of any criticisms. Well done :)Author's Response: Thanks for the great review! :) Report Review
here to review hun! sorry i took so long!
okay. for your first slash this was quite good. there are a few things that need some work to make this better ^_^
first, there needs to be a little more introspection from hugo. why does he like scorpius? what does he feel around scorpius? his emotional/physical reaction - writing a slash romance is no different to writing a heterosexual one really - its only the gender that changes. love is love so i guess love in a slash fic needs the same attention, or the same description.
i didn't get a lot from either character - i think you can definitely give more in depth information/emotions from hugo as he is the narrator. it's only a short piece though so i suppose there isn't a great deal of space for character development.
it being a dream bothered me. i know we dream often about the objects of our desire, but i would have liked, i don't know, more pining from hugo, i guess, lol, but that could just be me and my love of angst! i'd like to see the scene hugo imagines after he wakes up, the telling scorpius how he feels scene. it has the potential to blow up in his face or create a moment between them.
sorry if this makes no sense at all, lol.
i did like it and it has the potential to be a solid story.
Maji xxAuthor's Response: Thanks for the advie and I'll take into consideration what you said about character development. :) Also, I was thinking about adding in the part about telling Scorpius, but I thought that it would be good to end it here. Anyways, I might end up writing Hugo telling Scorp, but I don't really have any plans for it yet.
Anyways, I'm glad that you thought it was good and I'll think about everything you said! ^_^ Report Review
Hello! Here with your review.
Okay, this won't be a huge review because there isn't much to critique on. I thought this was very well done. It was sweet and simple, yet still had a lot of raw emotions in it. It was quite real the way it didn't have a fairy tale ending. I thought you captured Hugo's sense of desperation and confusion very well. There were a handful of typos, nothing to bad. You'll see them just by a read through, I'm sure. Other than that, I thought this was very nicely done. :D Thank you for dropping it off. --JennaAuthor's Response: Thanks for the review! I'm glad that you liked it. I was a little worried, since I'd never written slash before, but I'm glad you thought it was good. I'll have to look through for the typos. Thanks. :) Report Review
Hi! Thanks for entering my challenge! :D
This was really beautiful- I thought you captured the emotion of the moment really well, and it was a scene I could really imagine, the two of them kissing in the rain in the shadow of the castle... it was sad that it was just a dream!
Out of interest... do you imagine he ever does tell him? Perhaps not the tomorrow Hugo was hoping for, but any time in the future? I'm just intrigued. If he did... how would Scorpius have reacted?
I really enjoyed this story, thank you so much for writing it! :DAuthor's Response: Thanks for the review! I'm glad that you enjoyed this, and your challenge really made me sit down and write the slash peice I'd been thinking about.
I don't know if Hugo would ever tell Scorpius... I think that Scorpius woudl accpet it, if he had known, but tell Hugo that he didn't think of him that way.
Anyways, thanks again! :) Report Review
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