Reading Reviews for The Prewett Emancipation
21 Reviews Found

Review #1, by Secret Santa! Christmas 1975

17th December 2011:
Hello :) I'm here with the first of your Secret Santa reviews :D

You managed to capture the Weasley family atmosphere that is portrayed so well in the books, into your story. You can clearly see the love shared between Fabian and Molly and helps you understand why they're mentioned in the books so frequently - she obviously missed them!

I've always thought of Molly being the younger sister with two overprotective brothers, but your interpretation seems to fit so well! Fabian learnt from his sister and her achievements to become his own person.

Your characterisation was spot on. Molly was overprotective but loving, Arthur completely doted on Molly and was caring, Bill (or Billy) was well represented as a hyper two year old and I loved the dragon tou for Charlie, a hint at his future. Brilliant.

I hope you continue with this, although it'll be sad to see Fabian die :( Perhaps you'd be able to include more information about Gideon? It'll be nice to get to know him more aswell!

A brilliant start! Well Done!

You'll be hearing from me soon,
Secret Santa

Author's Response: SANTA! I'm so excited!

Thank you so much for your nice comments. I'm happy that you liked my characterization even though it wasn't what you imagined.

the second part is in the work and it will include more of Gideon for sure. Probably some more of Billy as well; I had so much fun writting this piece, I'm glad you enjoyed it, Santa!

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Review #2, by CambAngst Christmas 1975

16th December 2011:
In response to your author's note, I thought it was wonderful!

Such a warm, inviting, touching portrayal of Molly's family, parents excluded, of course. It brilliantly complements the characterization of her in the novels, both as a dedicated, loving mother as well as a very protective one. It must have been devastating for her to lose her brothers so soon after the time of this chapter.

I thought you nailed Molly's reaction to her mother's attempt to set her up. She responded with passion tempered by grace. Completely in character for an aristocratic young woman in whom the seeds of her future life with Arthur have already been sown.

I also loved your characterization of a young Bill. It was perfect for a two-year-old, albeit a slightly precocious one.

I do hope you write a part two, although if you carry this all the way through to the deaths of the twins, that's going to be hard to read. I mean, I'll read it, anyway. Just saying it's going to be hard.

Well done!

Author's Response: Oh wow, thank you so much for htis kind review. Especially about the characterization, I was a bit scared of how people would react to young Molly!!

I always so her as a passionate and fiery gilr, much like Ginny was in the books. She would have toned it down a bit with maturity and raising her family but she most definitly was a passionate woman!

Billy was just so much fun to write! Yes, a little precocious but it fits what he became, right? Head boy and top grades?

I am working on part two but I'm not sure where I'll stop. I've already grown fond of Fabian and killing him is hardly something I can imagine right now. I'll see how it will turn out though, we never know, I seem to like writting long stories.

Thanks again!

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Review #3, by dirtydeedsdonedirtcheap Christmas 1975

15th December 2011:
OH! It was PERFECT! WONDERFUL! I think you can tell from my use of caps how excited I am! I LOVED IT! These Christmas stories on HPFF have really gotten me into such a christmas mood. I got tears in my eyes when they asked him to be godfather! That was so heart warming. Aw! Lovely, really, really lovely!

Author's Response: Wow, thank you so much for such a kind review!

Yay, you're in Christmas mood! That is what this is all about, right? There are so many great christmas stories here, aren't there?

I thought that being agodfather would be the perfect christmas gift anyone can give! I also thought it was fitting to explain why he went fighting against evil and also to show the importance Molly's brother ahd for her.

Thansk gain, I'm glad you liked it!

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Review #4, by SexyDoorFrames Christmas 1975

14th December 2011:
Heya! This was really good, I really enjoyed it throughout. This is my first Fabian story and I think you handled the character really well. The characters and their personality you've shown in this story is brilliant. i really enjoyed your take on Molly, she was perfect. This was just adorable and left me with a smile on my face. In all, this was amazing. And now I can't wait until part 2! I look forward to it.


Author's Response: Ah, thank you so much!

I'm glad you enjoyed how I perceived these characters, especially Molly. I always imagined that she must have been cheekier when she only had a couple children!!

Part 2 is in the work and will be up... eventually! Sorry, can't be more precise because I want it to be worth it (otherwise, I'll just leave it to a one-shot).

Thanks again for this kind review, I really appreciate it!

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Review #5, by accioHPFF Christmas 1975

29th November 2011:

Wow, this was written really nicely! I really enjoyed the way that you represented the characters.
I don't really know what to say! I thought it was excellent!

This review is so hard to write, because I have nothing really negative to say...

It was Christmassy, yay!

Erm... sorry I couldn't say anything slightly better, but... I loved it! :)

Author's Response: Thank you so much for this nice review! I don't know how to answer except for saying thanks a million times! REading it really put a huge smile on my face and I'm so touched that you liked it and the way I wrote these characters. It is definitly Christmassy so it's the best time to read it, isn't it?

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Review #6, by Beeezie Christmas 1975

15th November 2011:
Here for review tag!

I really liked this story. It was sweet, and I thought that your depiction of Molly, Arthur, and Bill was great. It fits with everything that we've seen of Molly and Arthur that they'd be happy to have her brother for Christmas, and Molly's walking out on her parents was such classic Molly (and explains why her parents are never mentioned!). We know nothing about Fabian and Gideon from canon other than that they existed and were in the Order, but I really liked your portrayal of them, too - you made them close, but they were clearly different people. I feel like often when I've read about Fabian and Gideon, they're basically interchangeable, but you've given them each very distinct personalities, which I like a lot. The interactions between the siblings in particular felt very real to me - they each had their own different dynamic. I also loved the stuffed animals - great touch.

This was a really lovely job, and I enjoyed it a lot! :)

Author's Response: Thank you so much for this nice review!
I'm glad you liked the way I perceived these characters, they were so much fun to write, particularily Arthur and Molly. As for the twins, I hesitated a lot when creating them because I know some people see twins like Fred ans George as the norm : identical in everyway, even in the personality. It's not how I see that though; all the twins I know have very distinct personalities and this is how I wanted Fabian and Gideon to be. I'm glad you liked that though, thanks for telling me!

The stuffed animals is a tradition in my family and I just love it. I bought my goddaughter a giant panda when she was born and now, at 3, it's her best friend!

Thanks again for the review, it made my day!

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Review #7, by Pretense Of Perfection Christmas 1975

14th June 2011:
Excellent one shot! Normally I'd leave a very detailed review, but as I'm lazy and this is wonderful, I'm not going to. Good job!

Oh, and I feel so sorry for poor little Billy, he has no big stuffie to call his own. And no wonder why Charlie never marries and loves Dragons, its all Fabian's fault!

Author's Response: Thank you so much for this kind review, it really made my day!!
I'm glad you enoyed the detailing and the characters as well. Yeah, poor Billy, already dealing with the hardship that comes with being the eldest!!
I love this one-shot so much, I'm actually working on making it a two-shot; with the second part being how Fabian goes back to confront his parents about his decisions.

I'm glad you enjoyed it and I really appreciate this review, no matter how much you found yourself lazy, you put the right words in there to make me happy!

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Review #8, by _Leo_ Christmas 1975

8th April 2011:
Aww, that's so cute!
The chapter flowed nicely, a really enjoyable read!
I always pictured the Prewetts as a rich, stuck-up pure-blood family too; maybe not in the same league as the Blacks and Malfoys, but also firm in their belief in social standing, if not blood purity.
I quite liked your Fabian, and how he's different from his twin. And little Billy is adorable! And the dragon plush toy for Charlie; maybe this prompted Charlie's obsession with dragons? ;)
I feel all Christmas-y again, this is a really lovely piece.
xxx Leo

Author's Response: Hehe it is a bit out of the season at the moment!

Thanks for reviewing; I am glad you enjoyed this story and that I am not the only one who pictured the Prewetts like this!! Most people are surprised by this idea.

Yeah, the dragon plush is tiny wink with Adulte Charlie's love of dragons!! Thanks again for the review, I appreciate it a lot!


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Review #9, by schoenemaedchen Christmas 1975

16th January 2011:
Hello there...

So this review is painfully over due, but better late than never!

So I really do enjoy Weasley stories, just generally, but I especially love when people delve into the Molly/Arthur era just when they were starting out.

Your story is warm, gives the reader a good picture of what happened then, and I think leaves the reader really satisfied at the end.

Characterization was well done, and the plot was plausible and realistic for the age.

I thought the flow was a bit choppy at times. I felt sometimes it was a little bit too much information in some scenes, and that perhaps some scenes could be extended with detail instead. Just my personal feeling, though.

Otherwise, I wanted to mention one word--"acceptation" You mean, Gideon "accepting" his Mother's letter...

Actually, it isn't a word, I think you were looking for "acceptance" and perhaps thinking of expectation at the same time or something. It happens, thought I would just let you know!

Really, overall a great story to read. It is always so great to read a story that is a bit different and with these not-so-common characters.

Take care!!

Author's Response: Thank you very much for this review and for your correction; I will definitly get to it as I now understand what the mistake behind it!!

Thanks again, I really appreciate it!

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Review #10, by Mrs Roonil Waslib Christmas 1975

28th December 2010:
First off, I love the premise of this story; pre-Hogwarts era stories exist, but are rare in comparison to the Hogwarts and post Hogawarts era. Fabian Prewett is not a widely interpreted character as well, so kudos for thinking outside the box!

I liked was the characterization of Molly - how she was tough and fought for those she loved from early on in her life. Also, it never occurred to me that she might have been well off, but as a pure blood, non-Weasley, it makes sense that she was. That was a new perspective, so thank you for that! I liked the relationship between Fabian and Arthur - it struck me as so... raw and beautiful that Arthur hugged Fabian when he first saw him, and that Arthur treated him like a man. Let's be honest, a 17 year old male is not typically treated with such respect from someone five years his senior. In fact, one would think that they would be at odds, with Molly loving them both so intensely but in opposite ways. The fact that Arthur could treat Fabian the way he (probably) felt he deserved to be treated was miraculous and refreshing; no unnecessary drama there. I like the sentence regarding what Molly was distinguished in - it provided some amusement for the reader. I also enjoyed the last sentence, but what truly struck me was Molly's final declaration to her parents: "If being a Prewett..." I loved that! That was intense and pure dialogue.

The wording at the beginning for a few sentences felt a little off; I'd suggest just reading the first two paragraphs aloud. If it doesn't flow when you hear it, it probably won't flow when individuals read it. Other than that, the only thing that stuck out was when Fabian said something along the lines of wrapping Bill's present "crappily." I'm not so sure that Fabian Prewett would say that, especially in 1970. I'd suggest replacing that with something along the lines of shoddily, etc.

One other comment I have is this: At the end, it left me wanting more. And I'm unsure if that's a good thing or a bad thing, but what I do know is something felt incomplete. You wrapped up the story nicely with the tradition of large plush toys, but the issue at the beginning of the story really had nothing to do with gifts; it had to do with arranged courtships. As a reader, I wanted to know - what happened with Gideon, when he showed up alone? what happened with the ball? was there a scene, like Molly's? how did the Prewett parents react?

That was unresolved and I don't know if it was intentional or not, but those were just my thoughts.

Overall, a feel-good read. The relationships and characterizations were great! Well done :)

Author's Response: Thank you very much for such a nice review.
I really appreciate all the nice things you wrote down as well as the constructie criticism you offered. I will definitly re-read out loud the beginning and figure out what is wrong with it!!! (and will apply this to everything I write from now on, thank you for the tip!)
I am kind of glad to read that you wanted more because I felt the same way after writting it. Now that some time has passed, I've decided I definitly will add at least one chapter to this story; most reviewer seem to agree too so I think it might not be such a bad idea after all.

Thanks again for your time and very nice words, I appreciate it a lot and will certaintly let you know when the second chapter is up!

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Review #11, by Jane_Volturi Christmas 1975

28th December 2010:
Hi Akussa

It's JaneTwilight here from the forums. First of all I'd like to apologise for not getting this review to you sooner; I've been really busy this past month with real life, so it's been difficult for me to find enough time to read this lovely one shot of yours.

I'll begin with the dynamics of the Prewett family as that seems to be the most significant element in this story. You've provided the readers with a very thorough depiction of each of the family members; it's nice to see that there are similarities and contrasts between each character, it's adds a new dimension to the family that really succeeds in steering away from any unecessary cliches. I like the fact that the three siblings are united against their mother and her 'ideas' for their future lives. I don't think I've ever come across a Prewett story where Molly's parents try to set her up with 'respectable' purebloods. People tend to assume that because Molly is such a kind-hearted woman, it's perfectly excusable to ignore the obvious fact that she has decended from a pureblood family who are bound to be atleast a little bit prejudice so kudos for bearing that in mind.

Your characterization of Molly and Arthur were both nicely done; I don't have any complaints about either of them. Bill - or Billy even - was adorable, I don't have any complaints about him either (how could I?).

There is however one niggling thing that I feel the need to mention. At the beginning of the story, there's this heavy issue with the Prewett siblings and their mother's high expectations for them. Then however, the story changes to Fabian the family man and I think the flow is interrupted. Nothing ties in at the end and it's hard for me to fully figure out exactly what the purpose of this story is. I know that the general idea is the Prewett's emancipation but for me I don't think you fully got that idea across. I can't put my finger on exactly why, perhaps it's because you've concentrated more on Fabian and Molly rather than Gideon, I just get the feeling that his side of the story remains unresolved.

Your writing was, for the lack of a better word, perfect. I have a sharp eye when it comes to spotting any grammatical flaws and as of yet I have found none in this story. You applied a great consistency of description to your writing and I really enjoyed the composition and flow that your words had.

Overall, I really enjoyed reading this story; it was a well-written piece with an excellent storyline.

Katie (JaneTwilight)

Author's Response: Thank you very much for sur a great and helpful review. I'm happy you enjoyed this piece and really apreciate all your nice comments about it.
I have to say that I fully agree with your misunderstanding; the storyline of Fabian's emancipation is interrupted when it comes to dealing with his parents and their "ideas". At the time, I didn't really know how to incorporate that into the story but as time went on, I realized I could simply add another chapter to this story and this is what i am doing at the moment; trying to close the circle of Fabian (and Gideon too)' s emancipation from their parents' beliefs and plans. When it's done, I would really love to send it to you and see if you consider I achieved my goal!

Once again thank you for your kind words and for taking the time to read this piece.

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Review #12, by angeless7fallenstarsong Christmas 1975

18th December 2010:
Hello, this is Ange, also known as...*drumroll*... YOUR SECRET SANTA! I know, I know, try to control your excitement! :) For part three of your mega-awesome present, I am going to review at least one chapter of each of your stories. This is probably going to take a while, but I WILL GET IT DONE. *superman pose*

I would like to begin by saying that I *adore* Fabian. Although I guess I have no reason to, really, because we know nothing abt him from the canon. I still love him. ^^

Awww, I love the relationship between Fabe and Molly. :) Cuteness. And the Molly flashback is hilarious.

Oooh, some rebellion. I'd never really taken the time to think about Molly's childhood, but what you've written here definitely seems to fit.

I love the atmosphere at the Weasley house. :) Little Billy is so adorable! Fabian's not taking much care in wrapping the gifts was a small detail, but I loved that you had it in there. It fits with what Molly said about him not taking much care of his posessions.

And ooh, the dragon! Another totally fitting detail! :D And the teddy bear! I LOVE that you mentioned the teddy bear! :)

Poor Bill. I'm guessing that as a result of his childhood jealousy/exclusion he'll become a super-rebel-ginger and get his ears pierced. Poor guy. ;)

This was fantastic! Intricate, well-written, and just lovely overall. Can't wait to see the rest of your work!


Author's Response: Hello oh great Santa and thank you for such a great review!

I really loved working with Fabian too; it was for a challenge and I'd never given him a thought before. This situation was only too fitting for him and I felt the need to include Molly in there too.
I love working with cannon, gives you the opportunity to work with small details and include tidbits of information that gives your character more color, in my opinion of course!

I love your assumption that Bill will become a rebel because of his constant exclusion as a child!!! You made me laugh.

Thanks for one more amazing review!

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Review #13, by Cathie Christmas 1975

13th December 2010:
Aw! So cute! I love it!

Author's Response: Thank you, glad you enjoyed!

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Review #14, by Anonymous Christmas 1975

8th December 2010:
Just wondering: Is Ron's teddy bear at the end of the story the same one Fred turned into a spider? If so, tragic.

Author's Response: Hehe, that's basically the idea yeah and it is quite tragic! He's like Bill; no godparent's super plush...

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Review #15, by Illuminate Christmas 1975

28th November 2010:

This was a very sweet oneshot. I liked how you captured the warmth and love of the early Weasley family.

I think I would have liked a bit more of the whole arranged marriage thing, but overall it was generally well written.

Well done!

Author's Response: Thank you so much! Wow, I'm very touched by your comments; I'm glad I got the characters right.

I wasn't sure of how far I could go with the arranged marriage considering TOS but the more I think about it, the more a second chapter seems likely to happen (in which Fabian will have to face his parents). I don't know when I'll have time to do it but it is a definit possibility.

Thanks again for your review, I really appreciate you taking the time to to this :)

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Review #16, by Pen2Paper Christmas 1975

24th November 2010:
Pen2Paper from the forums with your requested review!
So sorry it took so long to get this review out... it's... i've been saying this a lot these last days as an apology, it's been a crazy few weeks! :P Anyway on to your review...
Umm well this one will probably be a short review, because I loved it so much and I couldn't spot much to criticise :)

Honestly is was great and very enjoyable. The settings, the prose, your narrative and flow it all works well with each other and compliments each other so well done really. I know how hard it is to pull a background character to the centre and make it work but whoa you did it with flare!

I loved Authur and Molly, perfectly in character as far as I could say and Molly less with her funny outbursts in her younger years not worn down by household work and seven children :) I love that Fabian and Gideon and twins, that's interesting! and the Christmas with the Weasleys was just wonderful and simple just as I would have expected it!

On the whole it was great. The only pointer I can think of to give is in the flashback scene of Molly's graduation party, the boys apparate home but they are both twelve and underage to apparate. Other than that it was a lovely read!

Thanks for requesting.

Author's Response: Thank you so much; I'm really, really happy to hear such kind words regarding this story.
I had such a good time writting it, I'm glad this feeling gets through to the reader.

I'm glad you noticed I tried to give Molly a bit more of a relaxed personality; like you said, she doesn't yet have the pressure of her full family! As for Fabian and Gideon, I always pictured them as twins though not necessarily the type Fred and George are!!

Thanks for pointing out the Apparition thing; I did mean it to be side-along Apparition but if it's not clear, I'll make the correction.

Thanks again for your review, I appreciated it greatly!

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Review #17, by EvanAsh Christmas 1975

23rd November 2010:
Really, really sorry for taking so long with this, first of all. I missed my chance to have the first review! But ahhh, well... blame my RL, it's been quite inconsiderate lately. On with the review!

I'm writing this as I read, to save time since RL still has me a bit crimped, so corrections and praise are in chronological order:

I love the choice of character. I honestly don't think I know anything about Fabian Prewett and minor characters are one of the greatest joys of fanfiction. I do have to wonder why his parents aren't aware of Vespera's activities, if she really is so bad. Wouldn't they at least be aware of her parents, since Dark Lord affiliation seems to mostly go with the family? Or are the Prewett parents a bit purist themselves, in which case... what happened to all their kids? XD I also find it highly unlikely that the cruciatus was used. It's an unforgiveable, remember: they'd be sending her to Azkaban already. Possibly threatening the Hufflepuff with one?

I don't think the sentence "taking a pose, like the models took in muggle magazines," needs the Muggle qualification. From what we've seen of the wizarding press (everything from The Daily Prophet to Witch Weekly to The Quibbler) it seems to mirror the Muggles quite faithfully, so I imagine their magazines probably employ models in much the same ways.

I love this line: M a big bo-ther now! XD Actually, just everything Billy says... (Completely agree with you about the name, by the way. Little boys don't make good Bill's.)

Overall, I really, really love this story. In places, I thought the domestic bits dragged, and that you could have made your points with less detail, but on the other hand, it is pretty much a domestic story, so that's probably just my personal tastes showing through. It's a great story, and I'm actually adding it to my list to read your other stories soon. XD

Keep up the good work!

- Evan

Author's Response: Hi! sorry it took a while to answer back but I really want to thank you for such a nice review.
I agree with your position about the unforgivable; didn't think that one through I guess! I will definitly make the correction. As for the 'muggle pose' that too will be changed, thanks for pointing out this wasn't necessary.

I'm glad you liked my 'Billy' characterization; it's so hard to write little kids!

Thanks again, yes, it is kind of a domestic story; I hadn't seen it that way at first but now that you point it out, it is the feel I wanted to give this story; to show that even though a war is creeping up, family moments can be enjoyed.

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Review #18, by Elizabeth_Black Christmas 1975

13th October 2010:
Hi! It's Elizabeth23 from the forums, here with the review you requested...I'm so sorry it's taken me a while to get to this!

Aw, this was such a touching story! I haven't read much on Molly and Arthur, but I absolutely loved you take on them, and I thought it was perfect!

The characterisation of the twins was amazing. I liked how they had clear differences and that one was stronger, while the other was weaker. Also, your portrayal of Wizarding Society, although only a brief part, was really chilling.

Billy was so cute! I don't have much experience with children, but I did think that you wrote him very well and captured his personality brilliantly.

I did notice that a few commas are missing throughout the piece [eg: 'Hey(,) Arthur, thanks for welcoming me for the holidays. Hey(,) Billy(,) my man!], but it wont take long to go over and fix :)

Your description was good, as well, but a bit more couldn't help. Just little details like hair and eye-colour go far.

Apart from that, I really, really liked this fic. It was well written and engaging, and your characters were exactly how I had imagined them. Brilliant job! 10/10 :D


Author's Response: Thank you for such a great review!
I loved working with these character and it seemed important to give the twins a different personality because I don't believe twins are the same. As for little Billy, I love him so much! I had never written small children before I hoped he wouldn't be too cliché so I'm glad you liked him as well!
Oh and just so you know, I edited the story according to what you spotted and thank you very much for pointing them out!

Well again, thanks for your review and I will definitly ask you again for my later work!

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Review #19, by liza_potter Christmas 1975

12th October 2010:
This is such a sweet one-shot. It just leaves you with that warm, fuzzy feeling inside after you've read it, you know?

In terms of characterization, I thought it was all great. Billy was adorable, Molly and Arthur were spot on and Fabian's characteristics seemed consistent.

The ending was too cute, and I thought it was clever of you to mention Ron's teddy bear.

Thank you muchly for entering my challenge!


Author's Response: Aww, thank you so much! I'm glad I could provide you a bit of happiness with my little story. I'm happy to hear that you liked the way I portrayed these lovely character; I was worried I might mess up since I have never written them before!
Thanks again for giving me such an amazing charater to work with; I never would have thought to write about Fabian Prewett until you handed him to me. I really enjoyed entering your challenge and cross my fingers that you received many more entries!

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Review #20, by Potter_Princessx3 Christmas 1975

8th October 2010:
Hiii, Autumn (PotterPrincessx3) from the forums here with your review! (:

You just wanted a general review, right?

I really liked this one-shot. The storyline was really cute. But at first I was like "Christmas? Its not even Thanksgiving yet!" Don't worry though, as I read on I really enjoyed it.

Your OC characters are fantastic! You described them all so much.

So basically, I loved your story! The ending was my favorite part though. It kinda of summed up the whole point of the story. (:

Thanks for requesting, request again anytime!


Author's Response: Thank you for reading it even though it's so christmassy!! I considered it the best moment in Fabian's life to make him make his choices. So close to adulthood and yet still a boy searching for yourself.
I'm glad you liked the ending, this was actually the first thing I wrote : the Christmas morning scene. I built the whole story around that (choosing the year according to Charlie's birth..) and I loved the idea of the plush toy because of Ron, obviously!!

Thanks again for your review, I really appreciate it!

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Review #21, by TenthWeasley Christmas 1975

7th October 2010:
Hello! This is TenthWeasleyWriter from the forums with your requested review.

Oh my gosh, I LOVED this story so much! This is one of the most creative, cute stories I have ever read. (: And it was also the first I've ever read about Molly's brothers, so hats off to you for that as well!

Bill (or Billy, I guess he is now) made me laugh almost every time he opened his mouth. And I don't usually laugh out loud at fan fiction! The way you wrote him was so cute and endearing. And I loved the rich-to-poor aspect of the Prewetts - and that you stayed true to form in having Molly and Arthur elope!

I saw one, maybe two minor grammar/spelling/punctuation mistakes, but seriously, it's really nothing to concern yourself with. I think you did a fabulous job and hope you do really well in your challenge! Adding the story to my favorites - very, very well done!

Author's Response: Thanks you so much for your kind review! I had fun writting it and Fabian appeared so clearly to me, I'm glad you like the situation I created for him.
Really, you made me blush with your kind words and I really thank you for it!

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