Hi! I really enjoyed your story and I think your right about the whole Curse-Breaking thing being slightly overlooked. Can't wait for next chapter!
Keep up the good work!! Report Review
I really like ur style of writing its so orginal! so nice for a change and i like how strong minded and passionate ur characters are it makes them so much more appealing!Author's Response: Strong minded and passionate is a good way to describe them! I've been going with crazy until now, your way probably works a bit bette though :P
I'm really glad you like the writing and thanks for reviewing! Report Review
Wow i love it. Just as amazingly lovely and funny as Monday, Monday.
xAuthor's Response: Thank you! You're far, far too kind!
Really glad you liked it, and really glad you reviewed! Thanks again ^^ Report Review
Door opened, instead of bear was Charlie. Although difference not immediately apparent.
...reaction to that line MAY have caused a multitude of stares from onlookers, as I read this in a room full of people and just could not contain laughter. Probably shouldn't read your stuff when people are around as I typically burst out laughing and get all sorts of funny looks :P
Anywho, I think it's fairly obvious by now that you're just a characterization genius and that you're going to get me to (fully) like Victoire by the end of this. That being said, she's hysterical and witty and completely amusing - I'm just now starting to realize how repetitive my reviews for you are, as all I do is rave about how much I love your characters. But oh, well, they really are fantastic to there goes any intentions to make this review any sort of constructive!
CHARLIE HAS A GIRLFRIEND? WHO'S NOT TONKS? WHAT. Oh, well, even if this technically refutes what just may be my OTP, it's still totally awesome! Totally lovable in that burly, cave-man sort of way, and I'm hoping there's more Charlie goodness to come? I rather enjoyed how he came across, even if you're a bit iffy about it!
Can't even say much about Louis here because it's just swooning, laughing, and wishing he was real most of the time - this being no exception!
Super duper excited for South American shenanigans to start happening, update for me soon please!
Really enjoyed it, as per always, Jack!Author's Response: I'm trying this new thing of being funny when I write. Sounds like it's working out alright so far :P
Ooh characterisation genius! Have to say I like the sound of that. Maybe I can get some buttons worked up or similar xD Seriously though, my plotting is so all over the place that I need SOME way to bail it out. If I can keep distracting readers with pretty characters it all works out in the end! As for Victoire, I do hope you like her by the end of it, can see why you would hate on her, but liking her is a much better way to go xD
I KNOW I KNOW! My theory is he was completely shattered and twisty after she a) chose Remus and b) died. Give him a good few years of being single, that's why Victoire is all like... the what? Umm probably not much if any, was really only throwing him in for fun, doesn't really have a role to play unfortunately.
Louis is Louis. Just does his thing, no matter what.
Shenanigans all over the place! Major excitement. So glad you enjoyed it, thanks for reviewing lovely! Report Review
So I completely blame Holiday for putting me so far behind in reading things. Then again Holiday was fantastic, so it is forgiven.
Anyway, loved the chapter, darling. Victoire is just as wonderful as she had been in the first chapter. Her whole shoe ordeal made me laugh! Charlie was wonderful too, loved him very much. And he has a girlfriend, Charlie with a girlfriend should be interesting, as acquired from Victoire's musings.
So, Curse breaking, Bolivia, looking forwarding to getting into that whole situation. Of course with the added bonus that Mathieu is now there, much as he is hated by Victoire.
Fantastic chapter, love! I can't wait for the next.
ColletteAuthor's Response: Oh well in that case I completely blame it too! I do hope you had a lovely time though!
Victoire is gorgeous. She's amazing without being all crazy like Dominique or anything like that. You did? Thank you so much, I really was quite worried about him.
It's going to get all kinds of exciting I hope. Well, that's the plan anyway. I've never really written much action, so I'll just have to see how I go. She really does hate him, pretty safe to say he's in for a world of pain.
Thank you so much lovely, I'm just glad you enjoyed it!
xx Report Review
YAY AN UPDATE!!!
Like I said, this chapter totally cheered me up. Was on the verge of angsting my night away, but thank goodness I found this. -squishes-
Anyhow, Vic was ♥ as usual. I really, really like her. Despite all the flouncing and that intimidating air that comes with being a Delacour-Weasley, she still seems to be so grounded and dependable. If I could be any of the next gen Weasleys, I'd definitely pick your Victoire.
Charlie's here! ♥ This was the best introduction ever:
Door opened, instead of bear was Charlie. Although difference not immediately apparent.
And he's all right! Really! I expected him to be a bit more... rugged in manner? Gruffer? But that's just my idea of Charlie, and I wouldn't say there's anything wrong with your version. He's so squishable and huggable - definitely not unlike a (teddy) bear. :P I still loved reading him, though, so don't fuss about it too much.
I absolutely adore this style, never fails to entertain. Can't wait for an update!Author's Response: YAY A GILL!!!
Eww angsting, definitely a good call to read this. Victoire > Angst. Fact.
Victoire is hands down the most sensible and together of the of the lot. I put quite a lot of Fleur into her characterisation. That side of her we see in DH anyway, very down to earth and mothering. Whereas with say... Dom, there's just not any of that at all.
Ehh shmehhh :P Well, I'm glad you liked him anyway! It's not that I hate it or anything, just don't think it's that good?
I'm making no promises on updates right now, maybe when uni calms down a bit I'll be able to get something going, but right now it is just WAY too hectic.
Thanks so much lovely! Report Review
Okay, so you know how I said that the last chapter of MM made me laugh with the first word? Well...this one managed it with the A/N which is possibly a real first. Woe ♥ That's always been a favourite word of mine.
- Shoes: 1, Common Sense: 0
- ...okay, that's the only one I can find because I read it, got distracted by a bit of sunlight and came back but more exist, I promise.
Charlie is perhaps a little off, and I think I can track that to 'matey'. He was absolutely fine before that and after but it seemed a little strange seeing that word coming out of his mouth. Perhaps marginally too young for him? Or too drunk!Molly for him. Aside from that, there's something rather Charlie to him. You've got a lot to play with so he came across absolutely fine. No need to worry too much at all.
Victoire continues to amaze. This feels more effortless than MM does at the minute. Very in control, directional, running towards the deeper part of the plot. Perhaps because there's less going on here, perhaps because it's less complex, I'm not sure but it works and incorporates Victoire really well into it. She just comes off the page and is really vivid and bright and lively.
Now, important question to close: when do we meet Mr Lupin? Am now definitely seeing him in Mr Banner Man Who's Name Escapes Me But Is Maybe Ben Hill? Irrelevant really but now definitely approve and I (+ probably many others) need a character to place against the lovely face.
The style never gets boring - it really ups the pace, makes it brilliant fun to read and ties it together neatly with all the other bits and bobs and insights into the minds of these Delacour-Weasley lunatics.
And yeah, okay, mind kind of blown by the quick update, I will admit and will also take that back if you make us wait 6 months for any update of any form.
Lovely, my lovely ^_^Author's Response: Woe is a FANTASTIC word. Was an excellent disclaimer to be fair. Just about my best yet -nods-
Nahh pretty sure that's about it actually, well, from memory anyway. And why is it you get the sunlight? It's pouring over here, very sadface.
Grr I think that's exactly it. I knew he wasn't quite right, but I couldn't quite put my finger on it. Was one of those things where he just wouldn't behave. Might just have to rewrite it now, going to annoy me until I fix it. Worsttt. Thanks for helping out though!
I'd say you're pretty much spot on with that. I think because it's so much shorter, and the plot is so much simpler, I can kind of thrash out the chapters in a very linear way? It's just a very simple, basic plot that lets the characters/Victoire run around going crazy. Am really very much thrilled you like her though.
Well, he needs to get out of school, so I'm thinking probably next chapter, maybe the one after that? It totally is Ben Hill, and why I've chosen Teddy to look like that will be explained. Seeing as what how I don't really see him looking like that. Don't think nearly enough is made of him being a Metamorphmagus.
It's a really... immediate style? Can kind of just throw absolutely anything in there. A bit like stream-of-thought maybe? I don't even know any more. They are absolute lunatics though, I love them!
Six months does seem a BIT excessive, pretty sure I can do better than that. Really though, thank you so much! Report Review
Ahahahaha I'm so in love with your style, Jack! Really, really hilarious, and there were so many moments worth quoting. I have some below, but I'm sure there are more that I just forgot to copy :P
-jeans just silly levels of tight.
-Felt mildly guilty for a second, then got over it.
-Just the right side of legible.
-lovely flavour, properly delicate, properly proper.
-It's unbelievable how nice I am to you. I mean, really, you know that right? Unprecedented levels of nice.
Vic is a rockstar. I'm still trying to wrap my head around the fact that the style is the same as MM, but you've still managed to give her a distinct voice. The impending Hogwarts mayhem sounds very intriguing! And I loved her interaction with Louis, and very much looking forward to Charlie! I dunno what else to say, Jack, except I. LOVED. THIS. As expected.
♥Author's Response: I really truly love it when people give favourite quotes. Makes me feel all hilaro and stuff xD
She pretty much is hey? I sort of imagine her as being a bit of a balance between Fleur and Dom, somewhere in the middle of those two. I've not given much thought to it actually. I kind of just write and hope it turns out okay, not particularly scientific but seems to work okay? Hogwarts mayhem is always amazing. Actually I thinking I'm going to use Hogwarts Mayhem somewhere (yes capitalised :P) it's a lovely phrase! I've written the Charlie bit actually, hopefully it's come out okay. Anyway, THANK YOU SO MUCH! Don't know what I'd do without your reviews! Report Review
Already told you how utterly fabulous this is, but am here to do it again!
I'm immensely excited that you're delving into the world of Curse-Breaking. Totally underwritten, and I'm beyond curious as to where you're going to go with it. Always rather envisioned Victoire as this prissy little thing, but clearly that will not be the case. I haven't always been fond of her either, but here you go with another ridiculously good story that's probably going to make me like her :P
Anywho, might be completely off on this (I can't for the life of me remember where I got this from) but you study something with international politics or something, right? Makes sense why your plotlines are always completely amazing - this one being no exception! At the risk of sounding like a broken record, am completely excited for whatever is going to go on in Peru / Lily's strike!
Best bit about being as good as self is able to do pretty much entirely own thing. Loved this line. The Delacour-Weasley kids just embody awesomeness, and it's fantastic that they're very aware of it XD
As always, your characterization is flawless and such and I'm just running out of different words to praise you with so I'll just leave it at: Wow. Can Victoire/Louis/Dominique be real? Please? They are actually the greatest!
Have got to agree that your narrative always ends up making me write like this. Not sure if this is a good or bad thing, but it really is rather fun!
Loved reading this even more the second time, and I didn't think that was possible! This is totally fantastic and I can't wait for more.
PS - You are most definitely on a roll, Jack!Author's Response: You are a lunatic Zinny! Just saying, like.
Curse-Breaking is indeed COMPLETELY and criminally underwritten. Oh well, such is life I suppose. Prissy little thing? With Bill and Fleur for parents I think not! I shall be immensely sadface if you don't like her at the end of this, so please do?
Ahhh yep. Pretty much. Well, close enough anyway. Definitely wouldn't call them amazing or anything. Probably is an element of what you read/think about/talk about finding a way into your writing. It making you who are or whatever. Pretty sure something awesome, can't really tell you though.
I like that they're so aware of it! Dom and Victoire especially. It just amuses me that they're arrogant enough to think that, yet self-aware enough to know it's arrogant, but then so arrogant that they don't even care :P Does that work? I think it works.
Man, I don't want them to be real! Well, maybe a bit. They're scary though!
IT'S FUN and probably a bad thing. If you actually write a story like this, then I'll be worried for you. I think you're okay until then though!
Thank you so much lovely, I'm really just glad you enjoyed it! Report Review
Another totally awesome MM spinoff! WITH LADY GREY TEA! ♥
Keep up this roll, much as I like making snarky jabs about how long I've had to wait for an update on MM, these side projects are fairly fantastic.
I wasn't quite sure how you were going to do this - Dom tends to dominate (pun intended :P) MM and Vic always seemed more grown up and sophisticated - the type to use full sentences xd. However, you've pulled it off perfectly, she manages to be distinct and have a voice of her own AND I LOVE THE BIT WITH LOUIS (and his artfully mussed hair). Also the continuity between stories, I've been looking forward to more Lily from MM.
So, all in all, looking quite brilliant!Author's Response: Jo! I actually put the Lady Grey in for you! Remember you mentioning liking it somewhere in the cbox [/creeper]
It's in the queue! Right now in the queue! Hopefully will be validated in the next day or so.
I wasn't entirely sure either to be honest. THAT IS THE BEST PUN EVER THOUGH. Umm okay, lost my train of thought now... OH. Yeah. Right. Okay, agreed, although she is actually still fairly hardcore and stuff. I was saying to Rachel, looking at her in AGS is probably a better indication than MM.
Louis = 200% man. Fact. SHE WILL APPEAR AND BE AWESOME I PROMISE!
Thank you so much! Report Review
Yet another brilliant piece of writing. How do you manage it?
Quite liking Victoire's POV. Poor Italian coffee boy Marco. I fear Vic is quite out of his league.
Love Love Love the Lily/Dom plot to protest Hogwarts-- Dom is quite the piece of work, though i do lurv e her and her flouncing ways.
Must go now and attempt to stop thinking in abbreviated sentences--can be vair tough.Author's Response: Oh, have you not been informed? I'M TOTALLY AWESOME :P Seriously though, I'm just thrilled you like it!
Oh man just SO out of his league. Almost feel sorry for him, except it's kind of lots of fun to write it this way.
Going to get all kinds of hectic is what that's going to get! Lily is going to be v. similar to Dom, just younger and angrier and with a cause to fight for. It's going to come soon, so look out for it!
Too much fun the abbreviated sentences, although really am quite sorry. Thanks so much for reviewing - I really, really, appreciate it. Report Review
How how how how HOW do you do it?
I promised myself that I would hate this.
I know how that sounds but Victoire in MM has always been overshadowed by Dom and Louis and Molly and the others and so I thought "okay, I can totally pretend this story doesn't exist for a couple of weeks. Not really my thing" but it's nearing midnight, I've done nothing all day and seeing you post in the new story thread caught my eye and now I'm here and both regretting it and glad of it simultaneously.
Regretting why? Well, because I'm kind of glowing a vivid shade of envy green that's probably lighting up my street, as well as angry at myself for finding yet another one of your bits of writing completely, well, irresistible. I absolutely blame the irregularity of said writing rather than the lack of my own self-restraint but still...
And glad of it why?
I could be here for hours.
Continuity = check. Consistency = check. Characterisation = check. Captivating = CHECK. It just has everything.
Victoire = so much stronger on her own. I mean, she's expected to fade into the background in MM and so on, because with Dominique stealing all the crazy light, there's not a great deal of room for her.
Here, she suddenly becomes alive in this way that is so your Delacour-Weasleys. From the off, she's Dominique and Louis's sister. Possibly the fact that all three of them have the Jack-speak (have I ripped that off Jo?) but even looking past that, the attitude, the character, everything is them.
Background = thrown in so fleetingly and effortlessly but thoroughly. Relationship with Teddy, her routine, her job, her likes and loathes, relationship with siblings and family, it's all there yet I feel at the same time like this was a breath of fresh air to read.
Bringing the Lily thing in here, now that, my friend, is clever and mightily teasing. That'll be MM focus still though, yes? And it'll be soon?
What haven't I mentioned?
Ah - plot.
Killer. Nothing else to add.
Sooo, the result of 12 hours of pure boredom has led me to this possibly hugely overly long review of Rachel rambliness but all is truth. Or at the very least, all is true to my opinion. I'm hoping this might even have kickstarted my reviewing again but that must wait for tomorrow.
Just...well, you've heard it all before so I'm not saying anything else. You never cease to surprise me.
PS You know what? I might even let Rita impulse post pre-queue closure after reading this...if you promise me you've put MM7 in.Author's Response: Gahh I keep trying to reply to this but then my internet dies or I accidentally close the tab or the browser freezes or, actually nope, that's everything that's happened so far.
Anyway, pretty sure you should stick to the glad part of things. Surely better for you in the long run than being regretful. With that said though, pretty much entirely agree with your concerns - I had them as well when the plot bunny flashed along.
I really actually was quite worried about Victoire. She's meant to be sort of half way between the crazyness that is Dom and the mothering-ness that is Fleur. Does that make sense? Maybe look at AGS rather than MM to get a better idea of how I see her?
You definitely have ripped Jack-speak off Jo :P Seriously though, I think that has a lot to do with it. I mean, hopefully if I wrote things properly her character would still come across, but I definitely couldn't say for sure.
I think I've gotten better at building backgrounds? I like to think I have anyway. Hopefully enough got across without it being all HERE READER, HAVE SOME INFORMATIONS ABOUT VICTOIRE YEAH?
XD Lily is going to be AWESOME. Yes will be soon. Very soon. Probably the next chapter I write actually.
Overly long review of Rachel AWESOMENESS is what you meant to write. Seriously, thank you so much lovely! And sorry it's taken me so long to reply, at least I got around to it eventually! Report Review
CORRR, THIS IS ALL LEVELS OF BRILLIANT!
Curse breaker Victoire = amazing, amazing, amazing. I love the way she interacts with the other characters, is clearly a rival to Dominique.
Much love for this story, dear. Let's keep up with good work and update relatively soon, yeah?
xxAuthor's Response: EVERY SINGLE LEVEL? THIS IS GOOD NEWS!
Pretty sure it's just Victoire, I mean, how can she not be amazing? Pretty much a genetic goldmine :P
I am doing my best! About 1000 words into the next chapter!
Thankee so much xx Report Review
Jack, this was brilliant!
I remember there being a topic over at TGS about this, and upon reading it I was thrilled. For one, it is Victoire [one of my weaknesses] with a mention of Teddy. But also I do remember it mentioned that it was based off of Indiana Jones [an absolute favourite of mine -swoons-] and In Bruges [hilarious, brilliant, witty, another fav]. So, defiantly caught my interest there.
I have always wanted to write a story of Curse Breakers [Bill], as it is probably the most awesome job in the HP Universe I have decided, and is VERY underwritten. So, basically, thrilled to see a story of that.
Admittedly, I may be one of the few to have not gotten around to reading MM [and others] yet... so I hope this won't hinder me too much.
Okay, rambling over. Basically, brilliant! Loved the first chapter; Victoire I can tell already I am going to love, she is grand. I can't wait to see her in action breaking curses, it is very fitting I like to think she'd pick an exotic sort of job.
Looking forward to reading more, love!
ColletteAuthor's Response: Collette! Thank you!
How can anyone go wrong with Victoire? I mean, she's the oldest daughter of Fleur and Bill, she has to be AMAZING! They're both lovely aren't they? In Bruges especially, Clemence in that in just... she's so so amazing.
You must! I completely agree with you actually. I guess the only reason it hasn't been written that much is it's quite hard to work romance into it? It's still a shame though, so much fun to be had.
Oh don't worry about that! Victoire is quite a minor character in it, so this is very much just having a bit more of a look at her.
Thank you so much! I always think of you as THE Delacour-Weasley writer, so to get your approval is just fantastic!
I've started the next chapter, hopefully it won't take too long to get it up. Thanks again lovely! Report Review
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