Another lovely and well-written piece. However I must start off with the fact that I had a real time deciphering just what character were involved in the story, which was probably your intention but it did really confuse me the entire time I was reading it! Then when I saw the final lines it all finally made sense :P
The whole piece had a very fairytale quality to it what with the princes, princesses and towers that were mentioned, which is very fitting to the time period in the fic. Your writing flows excellently and there is a beautiful amount of detail in your work that makes the setting and characters detailed and easy to imagine.
The relationship between the two was also really heartbreaking to read and had this 'star crossed lovers' feel to it which was great!
On the whole this was a very interesting piece. Well done! Report Review
So I'm pretty sure I read this before, but I never reviewed! That had to be rectified.
I really, really like this. The imagery and the language and everything, it all works so well together and makes this perfect picture. I loved the repeating of her name, twice, the 'princess in her tower' imagery, all of it.
-JasmineAuthor's Response: You're so sweet! Really, you've reviewed so much of my work and I can't believe I'm lucky enough to have such a faithful reader and reviewer.
Thank you so much, Jasmine! Your reviews absolutely make my day!
Celeste Report Review
Celeste, I've always been enormously jealous of your prose, and this particular fic didn't let me down. :) This was breathtaking, to say the least. I very much enjoyed it.
You have such a way with words that's very difficult to describe. In this fiction especially, it almost seems like I should be reading a poem instead of a full-fledged fic. Every line seems to be crafted so carefully, every little inch of the paragraphs is just... clever. And beautiful. Did I mention that? Very, very beautiful.
And I'm so glad that you did some work with the founders! I don't know what a lot of readers have against the founders' era, but I, for one, really enjoy reading them. They're very underwritten as well, and so whenever I stumble upon one I'm always really, really excited. This was no exception. :P
Before I go, I'd just like to point out this one vivid, gorgeous line that I particularly enjoyed: "Her name is the shadow of a star, the shedding of a petal, the perfection of ice."
xx RinAuthor's Response: Wow, thank you, Rin! :D I really appreciate a review - especially on something old and hurried like this piece.
Haha, the Founder's Era thing was actually not chosen by myself. I've actually been rather afraid of approaching this era, since it seems so difficult to write, but I was assigned a prompt for a challenge and it seemed to fit. And you're quite right - nobody really writes this era, and I'm starting to look into it myself.
Thank you very much, lovely! Your review was so uplifting and wonderful to read after a long absence from writing!
- Celeste Report Review
This is beautiful. The description throughout was lovely and flowery, and I mean that in no way but the best. I loved the way it was broken up into three parts, and each flowed perfectly into one another, making just perfect sense. Though I loved every single sentence, my favorite part would have to be the last paragraph, especially the line "Her name is the shadow of a star, the shedding of a petal, the perfection of ice." And the "Helena, Helena" following just gave me shivers and chills up my spine. This was eerie, beautiful, perfect, and everything else all in one. I absolutely loved it, an easy 10/10. Report Review
I can't even form a coherent thought or find words to explain how amazing brilliant and gorgeous I think this is. I won't even try.
I think you could probably bottle this talent of yours and sell it on the street...you know, the literary black market. XD
You are obviously not human. You are some strange alienoid poetic-prose-writing robot. And I love everything you write. Just when I think it can't get any more lovely, you go and write something like this.
MelanieAuthor's Response: Melanie, ILY. :)
- gurgles at a loss -
Seriously. Am speechless at the magnificent glory of this kind, kind review. I'm always stunned/shocked/surprised out of my skin when I see a talented author such as yourself like my work. Honestly, it still feels like a week ago that I was fangirling over you work, having found you for the first time and wondering if I could ever write like you. This...pretty much makes my life a bit. :-)
- Celeste Report Review
Dear Lord, woman! This was absolutely amazing! I knew that you would turn out something wonderful for this challenge, but this is beyond words. That's how good it is, truly. Your command of the language, your word usage, everything! It was all so lovely and it has me staring at this piece in awe.
I'm usually one that prefers a long read (in addition to writing them), but this was as long as it needed to be, I feel.
I adore that you didn't use their names, but I still knew whom exactly you were talking about. Especially in the end when I saw her name, my suspicions were confirmed correctly.
I loved the poetic-ism of this piece. The images you conjured were beautiful and lifelike. I absolutely adored this!
I think that you characterized them perfectly. Helena was always quite 'unreachable' in my opinion, and the Baron didn't understand her.
I also believe that the way you took the quote and turned it into something of your own was wonderful! It was amazing.
I especially liked the dagger and hilt comparison. It seemed to fit them quite well.
I love how Helena might actually like the Baron in this piece, but she plays coy. That's how many of girls in her time acted (as do I), and I do think that she would be hard to get.
The description in this is really great for a piece of such short length.
This was great!
LindersAuthor's Response: Linders!
Haha, I actually wrote this at four in the morning in some semi-asleep state. I wasn't actually conscious of what I was writing, but I was desperate to get it in before the queue closed. (Had to claim a banner!)
I pretty much owe Miranda (FannyPrice) for the idea of using the Grey Lady; it was her suggestion - I just realized that it went along with the quote well. ^^
Helena...was definitely a weird character to write. Very strong and very stubborn (foolishly so), but to show that all in a more subtle way was a bit more than I'd bargained for. Either way, I'm just relieved to be done with it and that you liked it! :D
Thanks so much for reviewing, Linders! I really appreciate it! ^___^
- Celeste Report Review
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