Reading Reviews for The Edge of the Universe
9 Reviews Found

Review #1, by Jayna Death

1st January 2016:
This was very different from a lot of the stuff I've read on here. I like how Lily refers to Harry as her boy, it made it feel a little more personal. You did really well with establishing the mood of this story and it does feel (at least to me) reflective and serene. You took on a big topic here, death and what happens after it, and you did well with it. This was definitely interesting and well-written. However, to me Lily seemed a tad out of character, but that's just my opinion. Overall, this was intriguing and different and there weren't any mistakes, but the flow was a bit off.


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Review #2, by nott theodore Death

11th July 2014:
Hello! I'm really impressed with this - you've written such a powerful and poignant one-shot in just 500 words, which is quite a feat!

I love the fact that you never actually say directly who the character in the story is - I worked out that it was Lily since it was about a mother waiting for her child to join her, but it's never explicitly stated. I thought that was really clever, because it could work equally well for other characters - Tonks, maybe, or someone similar.

I liked the characterisation here, and the feelings that you explored with this one-shot. Lily is clearly really proud of her son and wants him to be happy, but at the same time she misses him and there's a part of her that clearly longs for the two of them to be reunited - in death, since that's the only way they can be. I wonder if this moment took place before or after Harry met them in the forest? It would be interesting to find out!

Sian :)
Gryffindor House Cup 2014 Review

Author's Response: Thank you so so much for the kind words! This was a one of a kind piece for me to write, and I really liked how it was more open for interpretation than most of my other works. I didn't have a certain moment in mind for when it would have happened, but probably before she met him-though perhaps that would have made her miss him more? It's hard to tell, but its fun to think about!

Thanks again!

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Review #3, by Pretense Of Perfection Death

8th July 2014:
Awww, this is such a bittersweet story, I'm sort of torn between wanting to cry and waning to smile. Your writing here is quite powerful, and it evokes a very emotional response, from me at least.

I've always liked to think of Lily as sitting up in heaven with her friends and other deceased loved ones, watching over Harry. It's so sad to see a mother just waiting for her son to die, but in the end it is inevitable, and she knows this.

I'm not sure what the constraints of your other challenge were, but the only thing I might've liked to have seen was James sitting beside her somewhere, even if he didn't speak or anything. I always picture James and Lily constantly being together, and death is no different.

You set the scene really well, injecting in a very serene and mellow tone. It's really nice to think that everything is wonderful and there is no pain in the afterlife. I like how Lily thinks that those of us on earth shouldn't cry for the departed, but rather that the departed should instead be crying for us, because the world can be a cruel and cold place.

I think one of my favorite things was how proud she was of Harry, knowing that he would save the world and positively impact so many lives before his time was done.

Beautifully written!!

---House Cup 2014 Review---
Pretense Of perfection, Gryffindor

Author's Response: Thank you for leaving such a sweet review! I really like how you raised the question of where James would have been, because its true the two of them probably would have been together most of the time! It honestly just didn't work with part of the challenge, but that would be an interesting companion piece to work on! Once again, thanks for taking the time to review!

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Review #4, by flozoeoreo Death

8th March 2011:
That was sweet :) That was Harry's mother, wasn't it?
10/10 :) ~Flora

Author's Response: Yes, it was Lily! I never directly said that it was her but I'm glad that you worked it all out. Thanks for the review!

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Review #5, by Indigo Seas Death

15th January 2011:
This was mind-blowingly unique. And not only that, but you've also managed to have such a lovely style in such a shortened word count. I mean... wow. Can I say that again? Wow. How but once more... Wow. WOW. WOW.

OK, so, letting me move on from single syllable words, I really loved this. Like, really. Because your style is so flawless throughout, the words just seem to ebb and flow and melt into each other. It really is quite stunning. I'm especially impressed that you managed to do all this in such a short word count. Again, very impressed.

And the originality! This was... um... wow. And I don't have any original words to use for your original story, but it really was gorgeous.

And this LINE! It made me melt a little: "Death is a beautiful place."

I believe this is when I should go back into my kitchen to fetch a towel for all the drool over my keyboard. Excuse me.

xx Rin

Author's Response: This review totally made my morning.

I'm really glad that you liked this, because it was something different and not like most of my other things, and I wasn't really sure if it was a hit or a miss. It was something that really stuck with me though, so I ended up throwing it up anyways. But I worked really hard to use the right 500 words, so I'm glad that it came together well.

Thanks soo much!


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Review #6, by moonbaby11 Death

31st August 2010:
Wow. I thought this was really beautiful, especially since it was only 500 words long. Sometimes I think that the shorter the story is, the more beutiful and touching it can be made.

I could really feek what Lily was feeling through out this whole thing. I loved hwo she kept mentioning that in death, people are free andhave no fears at all. It just gives me a wonderful image of it.

Overall, I thougt this was perfect. I love hearing stories about people watchign and thinking about their loved ones from heavan. :)

Author's Response: I really struggled to make this 500 words, I had to keep cutting things out and finding simpler ways to say things! The less words the more important each one of them are! I'm glad that you liked the feelings and the ideas, I tried to capture the fact that when people leave us they go to a better place.

Thanks for the review!

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Review #7, by Cleopatraa Death

19th August 2010:
Seeing as I could not see about who the story was about I had just to read this so I could satisfy my curiosity. This story almost made me cry which is a huge thing because Iíve only really cried once by a story and nothing else made me almost cry before. You wrote this so beautifull and I could feel the fact you poured so much emotion in this. So well done !

Author's Response: I'm really glad that you liked it! I tried to make the summary and such a little ambiguous because it was hard to put it in a way that sounded good and made sense. Thank you for the review!

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Review #8, by Ronsgirl29 Death

15th July 2010:
I have to say, this was really wonderful, and rather touching. You used the picture perfectly, and it made me want to cry. I like thinking of the afterlife as a place like that, where you can just be at peace. It sounds nice.

Just amazing imagery and use of words. I loved this. Thanks so much for entering it in my challenge. :D


Author's Response: I saw that picture and I was instantly inspired, and I'm glad that you liked it. It took me ages to get the words right, so I'm glad that it seemed to work out well!

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Review #9, by Hermionniny9 Death

13th July 2010:
I commend you, not many stories make me cry, so well done. it was so beautiful, not drawn out and there was some heart felt emotion in there. well done. its such a lovely image, sitting on the end of the universe, i hope the after life is like that, waiting for the others.

from a very tear full
Hermionniny9 x

P.S so okay maybe HPHPP and HPHD made me cry and The Constant Princess. but well done all the same

Author's Response: I'm glad that it managed to make you cry, I was trying to get as much emotion in as possible in a short story. But I hope that afterlife is like that as well, it'd be wonderful. Thanks for the review!

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