I really like this idea! I wouldve never thought of it! Now keep writing! I order you! Report Review
i really like this and hope that some day you write more Report Review
It sounds interesting so far :)
I'm Amberfire from the forums if you remember me... lol, (I was the title's, um, birth-er?)
I wanted to read this and see what you'd done with the idea and it seems interesting :)
One thing I think you'll have to watch is slipping out of character for Hermione; I know right now she thinks this is a dream so she probably isn't questioning things as much as she would be if she was certain everything was real, but I think you'll need to make sure she does get very confused and does challenge the changes at some point.
Also with Madame Pomfrey, it would have been great to hear more about that conversation because it is Hermione trying to figure out what has happened to her and in-character, Hermione needing to figure that out would have been something of the upmost importance to her.
I think that if you can, slowing the story down to add more information and description like the actual conversation with Madame Pomfrey, and more about the feelings Hermione experiences would add a lot to your story and make it more believable.
Because Hermione in your story is put in a very different situation than we would ever see her in a Potter Book, you need to convince the reader that the events, feelings and actions that take place actually could happen in the Potterverse.
Can you see where I'm coming from?
With Draco and the kiss, I think you handled the reaction quite nicely :D I liked the:
'Of course, when Hermione dared open her eyes and find that it was Draco standing next to her, she was so closed to screaming her lungs out.'
I think you've set up for a very interesting story and I hope you continue it :)
...btw, this wasn't meant to be offensive, so I hope you didn't get that vibe! Report Review
Hm, interesting idea you have going on here. I'd love to see where you take this story. By all means please keep it going. Report Review
Haha! This is awesome! You spelt Weasley wrong in the summary though >. Report Review
Oh, I can't wait for the next chapter!! Update fast, haha! it was really good! Only suggestion is to add a bit more detail, her confusion isn't really prominent and a more in-depth conversation with Madame Pomfrey would have been nice to read. Report Review
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