O.O < I make this face because here I was thinking look a mystery fic one second then the next I'm trying to hold my laughter because I don;t want to wake my sister! I loved it though I feel like this chapter could have been divided into two, I think too much is happening and it would be better percieved if the chapter was divided into two.
But I loved it and I'm still laughing :DAuthor's Response: Thank you very much! You can tell your sister it is my fault her sleep has been interrupted. Thanks for the suggestion about splitting it into two chapters. I don't think this will ever be continued, but if it was, that would be a good idea. Report Review
HOLY SMOKES! At first I thought this was going to be a serious murder mystery time thing. Sort of like Clue (even though I never played Clue before so maybe I'm wrong about that) but then as I started reading this I could not stop laughing. There was so much packed into one chapter that it just made it INSANE. I love insane! I like random, I want to be thrown off every which way you can possibly think of. I really don't know what would happen next but this was quite the first chapter!
Excellent job!Author's Response: thank you very much! I suppose if you like random then this sort of does the job :D thanks for the review! Report Review
Hi! You're tagged!
Well, this was certaintly something else!
I was a bit overwhelmed at first; I felt like you were trying to cram too many pop cultured / extra-original little details and I could see this story going everywhere but in the direction you want it to.
As I kept reading though, all these little details stoped bugging me and I could enjoy the humorous story behind it all. I now want to know what the rest of the story will bring!
I noticed a couple typos through the chapter, the most obvious one being this one :
"OPEN PACKAGE AND PEIRCE LID"; it should be pierce lid
Overall, a strange story that I'm glad I kept reading. I almost stop at the change of scene, where Ron comes into the story, because I felt overwhelmed but after that, it slowly grew on me and I could appreciate the originality and humor of this chapter. I hope you'll post the rest eventually!!Author's Response: ha ha thanks. I definetly agree with you; it is very overwhelming and all over the place and basically a piece of nonsense, so good on you mate for making it all the way to the end! I don't think even I could accomplish that if I tried to read it... Report Review
I thought the story was very funny, and I could not stop laughing at several points. The writer clearly has a good grasp on comedic timing and when to use it. I would not mind seeing future installments in this... I say, I would be quite willing to read it all the way to the end of the story.Author's Response: oh gosh, i kind of forgot this story existed. thanks so much for reviewing though! glad you thought it was funny. for the time being it's been abandoned, but who know what the future holds... Report Review
Crazy. Mental. Weird. FREAKY.
Okay, so what the hell?
I am oddly REALLY wanting an update right now. Er, yeah, update would be good.
I can't believe I'm saying this, but I love this. It was funny, interesting and wacky. Exactly my thing.
UPDATE NAOW. xAuthor's Response: first off, I'd like to thank you for even making it past the disclaimer. secondly, I'd like to thank you for not flaming it to a crisp. an update should be making its way to the face of the internet...sometime. Report Review
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