Amazing! I love the song Monster AND the story! You did a greay job!Author's Response: Thank you! I wrote this for a challenge awhile back. I'm really glad that you stumbled upon it and liked it. Thanks for reading and reviewing! Report Review
WOW! Just WOW! This was absolutely fantastic! I had never thought of Pettigrew in those terms before! I really liked the persona of him that you captured here. It was so moving and so realistic! Beautifully written and fantastically told. I loved everything, the little snippets of the characters of James, Sirius and Lupin you captured, and how Pettigrew just wanted to be included, how soon that wasn't enough, how he wanted more. The Marauders turned Peter into what he was without realising it. Not that you can blame the Marauders, mind. I really felt for Pettigrew in this, and that was something I never thought I would actually ever say, but there you go! This really gets into the mind-set of Pettigrew, and in a way almost (I did say almost) makes what he did understandable. I had never thought about him like that before. All I can say is this is an absolute fantastic one-shot and I'm adding it to my favourites! 10/10! :)Author's Response: Thanks for reading and reviewing :) I wanted to kind of get inside of Peter's head and find out what made him betray his best friends. I mean, he was sorted into Gryffindor, so he had to have a certain amount of courage at some point. Plus, he was a marauder and James obviously trusted him with his life, so at some point, he was probably a pretty decent guy. So this is my attempt at explaining what turned Peter the Marauder into Peter the Death Eater.
I'm glad you felt for Peter. I was really trying to get inside his head and explore a side that was a little more difficult to hate, even though he made some really bad, selfish choices.
I wanted to show how the actions of the other Marauders kind of influenced Peter to do what he did, but in the end, it was all on him. And I wanted him to have a little remorse at the end because I think he really did care about James, Sirius, and Remus.
Anyway, I'm really glad that you liked this so much and thanks for the favorites add :) I haven't forgotten about your fabulous story and am still planning to get to reviewing the other chapters, but I've been a bit busy lately. I promise I'll get there!
hey! This was such a well-written piece. I never saw Peter from this angle but you did a great job in depicting his feelings! Your portrayal was really good. the writing style was awesome. I really liked reading this - it was so realistic. Good job!
(AditiDraco95)Author's Response: Thanks for reading and reviewing :)
I'm glad that you enjoyed this story and my portrayal of Peter. I like to try to get inside the heads of unliked characters and try to figure out what makes them tick. Thanks again! Report Review
So right off the bat, you got the personalities down. Sirius is cool; James is athletic; Remus is smart. You pinpointed marvelously the top trait each one of them possesses. I also like how you mentioned that "maybe Remus made them" accept Peter, because that seems like a Lupin-esque thing to do.
I love that you address the question of why Peter was accepted as one of the Marauders. If it's something we readers are wondering about when we read the series, one can only imagine that Peter is wondering the same thing. That must've made him feel awful... to be the "uncool" one in the group. That's something many of us can relate to.
You show us that Peter is in a situation that a lot of people find themselves in. At times, he feels like an outcast among the other Marauders, being used as bait or lookout. But at other times, he feels loved and accepted. Basically, being one of the Marauders makes him both happier and more dejected than anything else could. Sometimes he questions whether or not it's worth it, while other times, he can't remember why he ever had doubts. This is a feeling that I know that I can relate to.
Then comes the peer pressure to become an Animagus, which turns into a disaster. I can't even imagine how frustrated and lonely Peter must've felt.
You go on to show that Sirius does ultimately mature. He offers to protect Peter with his life if they go into hiding, which naturally only makes the latter all the more guilty.
I can't even tell you how much I love that you include Peter picking up Voldemort's wand. So many people point that out as a plot hole, when really Peter seems like such a simple explanation.
All in all, fantastic job! A great look into the inner workings of Peter Pettigrew.Author's Response: Thanks for your review :) I'm glad you managed to find my one Marauder's Era story :P
This story is kind of stream of consciousness, and I wanted to kind of boil the story down a bit and make it more simplistic and straightforward. So I started by boiling down the Marauders into their one primary characteristic: Cool Sirius, studious Remus, athletic James, and mediocre Peter (not that he is necessarily mediocre, but he definitely thinks he is if nothing else).
Sorry, sometimes I tend to ramble and go into way too much detail when I am responding to reviews :P I love your review. Everything you said was exactly what I was trying to do and get across, so thank you. I love examining characters who are "unlikeable" and trying to figure out what makes them tick a bit, and make them relateable.
Ultimately, Peter was a Marauder and I think James, Sirius, and Remus really did love and trust him like a brother. Peter just didn't realize that until it was too late.
Thanks so much for reading and reviewing. I'm glad you enjoyed this peek into Peter's mind (or at least Peter's mind as I envision it).
~Singularity Report Review
holy cow. this was a really good one shot. I think it really explained his side of everything really well. I'm just going to make this a quick review, but overall this was great! I would be really proud of it if I were you. :)Author's Response: Thanks for your review. To be honest, I am kind of proud of this little number. I love writing about unlikeable characters and trying to explore why they are the way they are. Often, I find something that I can sympathize with, like Peter in this story. Yes, he was a disloyal, cowardly git, and nothing excuses him from betraying Lily and James and framing Sirius, but James and Sirius weren't exactly great friends to him. It's another example (the HP books are full of them) that the way you treat people matters.
Thanks again for your review. I'm glad you enjoyed it. Report Review
Singularity: Very good story showing us the mind of Peter Pettigrew. I liked that you brought attention to the fact that James and Sirius' actions toward Peter could have resulted in his betrayal. It was James who bullied Snape, backed by Sirius, causing his resentment and hatred for them in the future. Only Snape's love for Lily turned him toward the light and Dumbledore. Remus was the voice of reason but too weak to stand up to James and Sirius. In a way, they brought it upon themselves and drove Peter to the Dark Lord. You brilliantly showed us that Peter still had the free will to make the right decision but due to the shame of his betrayal, he chose the darkness. Excellent story line. Well thought out and illustrated in this story. I think you should contemplate writing a story about Peter's pause to give mercy to Harry at Malfoy Manor. You've certainly done justice to his sad story so far. I think you could finish it with a compelling drama that shows what can happen to people when they are used, unloved and bullied. Well Done. PW
p.s. Btw, I got the line, " Don't you think?" in your response to my review. I love the way Ginny says that to Harry in the infirmary as Won-Won is recovering from the poisoned mead. You don't miss much do you?Author's Response: Hi friend :) Good to hear from you again! Peter Pettigrew is one of the most fascinating characters to me (despite the fact that he's also one of my least favorites...I can't stand disloyalty). I wanted to explore what could have caused one of the marauders to turn against his "best friends." I still hold him completely responsible for his own actions, but you're right, in a way, the others kind of pushed Peter away. At least that's the way I see it.
I really love your idea about writing Peter's POV in his death scene. I think I might run with that after I finish some of the challenges that I'm working on right now. We'll see if the plot bunnies are feeling kind. I'd also really like to write his sorting at some point. I'm curious as to how he got sorted into Gryffindor in the first place.
Thanks for the lovely idea! And, as always, thanks for being such a loyal reader and reviewer. *hugs* Report Review
Wow. This was just. wow. I loved this! You actually made me feel bad for Peter, which I never thought woudl be possible! You gave reasons as to what he did and why he did it. Heck, if I had been in that situation, I might have done the same thing! I loved that you actually made ms top and think about Peter and why he did what he did. I don't think I'll ever look at him the same again.
Anyways, I liked how you had Peter try and not betray his friends. James and Sirius never really seem to listen to Peter, so it was really their fault as much as it was his. I liked that idea.
I don't really have anything bad to say about this. It was just so good and I loved the way you wrote it. You captured the characters really well and didn't just make Peter a peice of dirt. You actually gave him feelings and reasons behind his actions.
Overall, this was really great and is definetly being added to my Favourites list. Great job and keep it up! :)Author's Response: Thank you for the lovely review and for the favorites add! I'm really glad you liked this story. I wasn't really sure how I felt about it, so I appreciate the feedback.
I am really fascinated by Peter's character and wanted to explore what could have possibly led him to betray one of his best friends. I don't want to excuse his actions at all, but maybe it's another reminder that the way you treat people is important.
Thanks again for taking the time to read and review! I really appreciate it :) Report Review
First things first, I absolutely loved the portrayal of Peter Pettigrew. You did what JK Rowling didn't: You made the reader sympathise with him. You made his actions understandable, and the way he ended up who he was.
Second: Two thumbs up for the song choice. It fits in remarkably well. Not only that, but Skillet is LEGENDARY. :) Haven't come across any Skillet fans on the site before, so you're officially cool.Author's Response: First, I feel like I must be honest with you...I'm not really a Skillet fan. I was given the song (which, I'll admit, really grew on me and is a pretty good song) for this challenge. I don't really listen to them on a regular basis. Sorry...*hands back 'officially cool' title*
Thank you for reviewing, though! I really appreciate it. Since you're a fan of the song, it means a lot that you thought the story fit well with it. I'm really glad you enjoyed my portrayal of Peter. That's exactly what I was trying to do...come up with a way to explain why he acted the way he did and hopefully make the reader sympathize with him a bit along the way.
Thanks again for reading and reviewing! It makes you officially cool :) Report Review
Well... Hi there! Erm... Momentarily speechless. *breathes*
Okay...Let's start. This is... absolutely breathtaking. The writing, the emotions, the feels and everything about it is incredible. You really have managed to take us right through to Peter's point of view, and dare I say it? I actually feel sorry for him.
His realism to how he feels is completely understandable too, and I love the way that you added in canon to original and completely made it your own.
I'm not much of a fan for a first person written fiction to be honest, but if this wasn't in first person, I don't know how you would have pulled it off so effectively. Simply beautiful.
You've put me in a right pickle though... I just don't know what to critique hahaha Erm... Do you have a banner? I can't see it...But chances are it's my internet since it hates me... But yes, that's a desperate-I'm-still-speechless sort of critique :)
Just keep up the fantastic work - it's lovely to read a less major character with the lead role in a fic :)
Curiosity is not a sinAuthor's Response: Thank you for your lovely review. It made me beyond happy that you were able to feel a bit of sympathy (or at least pity) for Peter. That was definitely the goal. I wanted to explore Peter's character because he fascinates me. How did a kid who was sorted into Gryffindor and accepted as a Marauder turn into the traitor Wormtail?
But anyway, I really appreciate you taking the time to write this review. I'm really glad you enjoyed it. :)
P.S. I do have a banner :P
That was amazing! You went deep into peters mind and showed exactly who and why he is!Author's Response: I'm glad you enjoyed my characterization of Peter. Thanks for reading! Report Review
Wow, I really like this. It was powerful, it was beautiful, and the lyrics really seemed to fit.
I'm really glad that you chose to write about Peter. So few people do, and I'm glad that you chose to talk about him before the betrayal. After all, he wasn't always a bad guy, and something like that could provoke someone into going to the darker side if they never felt as if they belonged in the first place.
I really liked how Peter tried to do the right thing, but they simply laughed at him. I can imagine the ridicule would annoy him even then. It was kind-of bittersweet that he felt as if something more than just a tag along at that moment.
So, I really liked the characterization of Peter. He has a lot of self-loathing, but when one is overshadowed by people like James, Sirius, and Remus - I can see that happening.
The plot was a simple one, but it worked well, I think. There were no gaping plot holes and the reason that he turned against them is a viable one. No one likes to constantly be the brunt of a joke.
I didn't pick up on any obvious spelling or grammatical errors, so kudos there! I always like pieces that seem well put together. It's less jarring than one spewed with spelling and syntax errors among other things.
As far as the flow goes, I think that the pace was perfect. I didn't think that it moved too quickly or too slowly.
First person narrative can be quite tricky, sometimes, especially with canons. But I think that you pulled it off quite well.
Great job! I loved this.
LindersAuthor's Response: Thanks for another beautiful and thoughtful review, Linders. It was a pretty short story that encompassed several years and events, so I'm glad that you found the pace to be alright.
I've always been intrigued by Peter. He's such an interesting character. It bothers me when people write marauder's stories and either leave Peter out, or write him as a completely traitorous and unlikeable character. He must've had some redeeming qualities, even if we never get much of a chance to see them.
Thanks again for the review. I'm glad you enjoyed the story. Report Review
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