Reading Reviews for A Love Between Two Worlds
20 Reviews Found

Review #1, by CJ Ray Ray Commencement

2nd April 2012:
Post the next one Please. I live this and I. An wait for draco to propose or for Harry and ginny's wedding. Post soon PLEASE!

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Review #2, by NocturnalOppie Arriving at Hogwarts

17th March 2011:
I love how you make lots of references from the books, like S.P.E.W and how the hat sings. Great first chapter. Cant wait to keep reading.

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Review #3, by Kenzie Black My Friend Harry Potter

23rd January 2011:
I really love your story. This was a good chapter. Update soon(:

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Review #4, by KiwiSarney Once Upon a December

7th September 2010:
Great story, loved it :)

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Review #5, by bri_5_stars Hell to Pay

11th August 2010:
I really like this series... when is the next chapter coming out? I am really looking forward to it! Contact me if you can I look forward to reading the next one.

Author's Response: thanks! I'm halfway through the next one - it will probably be out monday or during the weekend!

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Review #6, by Scarlet Shay This is Halloween

22nd June 2010:
Amazing story!!! I can't believe I'm cheering for a Gryffindor and a Slytherin!!! It's really good. The only thing you can improve on is your grammar. I find it a little hard to read at times but aside from that, it's awesome!!!

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Review #7, by Amber A Lion in the Snake's Den

19th June 2010:
Great! I like the chapter name too. I could never be so creative. I'm interested to see what happens with the whole thing about the Malfoys wanting them two to get married.

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Review #8, by K Stahl The Prince and the Pauper

15th June 2010:
Dear Dracostruelove612,

Thank you for your laudatory review. I am honored by your request that I review your story. I am no writing expert and I will not pretend to be one here. I will not comment on your theme or plot. These are for you alone to determine. I will make only a few suggestions that I have found useful in my own writing.

First: Use a word processor or text editor with a spelling checker to write your story. Set it to check spelling and grammar while typing. This will make you aware of any spelling errors as you type them. It should also pick up punctuation errors. Also, use the internet. Searching on 'use of comma' will bring up a number of sites that can help you (e.g.

Second: After you have completed a chapter or just finished writing for the day, re-read what you wrote the next day, and re-read it out loud. It is important that you put it down for a day when you re-read so that you will read what you actually wrote and not 'read' what you wanted to write. You will catch many errors just by pronouncing what you have written. Allow yourself time to edit your work.

Third: Take some time in the library to read samples of literature published for your intended reader's age. Specifically note how the author handles dialogue. Reading the fiction of published authors is the best way that I know to get a feel for how a plot can 'flow' smoothly. You will find that your writing style matures as you read and write more.

Finally: The first step to creating a story is to create a specific conflict and bring it to an appropriate conclusion. Identify your characters and know your story's climax before you begin writing. This will enable you to write to a known ending. If you do not know your ending, your story is danger of drifting without purpose, without plot. I once heard of an author who had created so many characters, that he did not know what to do with them -- so he took them out in a boat and drowned them.

I hope that you find my comments useful. Keep writing. You are getting better with each chapter.

Yours truly,
K Stahl

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Review #9, by lunalovegood2009 Draught of the Living Death

4th June 2010:
Wow... What a cliffhanger! I wonder what's in store for Heidi and Draco next?! I really do hope you update again soon and I have added the fic to my favorites. ;) Thanks for reviewing one of my fics, I thought I would return the favour! =)

Great fic so far, I really hope you finish this story!


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Review #10, by Amber Draught of the Living Death

3rd June 2010:
Hey, I really like where your story is going. I think Heidi is a great character and you are doing a good job with Draco too. He is like the right balance of good and not-so-good haha. Anyways, can't wait for the next chapter! I'm interested to see Draco's reaction to where Heidi lives.

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Review #11, by little miss malfoy Draught of the Living Death

2nd June 2010:
decided pansy isnt as fun any more great hapet though plz plz plz update soon :)

Author's Response: Yeah i agree Pansy's done after this chapter. i just needed a resuce scene - I dont plan to have her really come back with such importance as the story goes on.
- Katie

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Review #12, by little miss malfoy This is Halloween

19th May 2010:
great new chapter, love how evil pansy is :P

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Review #13, by Grifferin Quidditch Anyone?

15th May 2010:
this is a really good story, i definitely enjoy Heidi's character, all in all i'll give it an 8

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Review #14, by lil miss malfoy Meetings in the Tower

10th May 2010:
hey this is really good actually, update soon !! :)

Author's Response: Really! Thanks for the review :) I will do my best to dig deeper into a thrilling plot!
- Katie

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Review #15, by lil miss malfoy Meetings in the Tower

10th May 2010:
hey this is really good actually, update soon !! :)

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Review #16, by Shannona Meetings in the Tower

8th May 2010:
I love it so far, you have the perfect balance between speech and description and the flashbacks really help to flesh the story out. I also like how nice Draco is but there does have to be some reminder of what he is like around Slytherins soon so that a real secret romance can take place. Really Good x

Author's Response: I promise i will have some mean Draco when he encounters the gryffindor gang! thanks for the feedback! :)

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Review #17, by renee89 Meetings in the Tower

8th May 2010:
Great story so far. The only issue I have is that you switch point of views frequently. For example:

"ďIím not what everyone think I am Heidi, Iím not a Death Eater.Ē He stated. This sentence caused relief to spread through her. You didnít want Draco to be like the people who killed her father. From that sentence on they spent the next few hours standing together in the tower. He told her how he had been taught to treat muggle borns as inferiors."

In this section you go from first person (I) to third person(her,they, she) all talking about Heidi. This is the only inconsistency I have found, so keep on writing! I look forward to the next chapter!

Author's Response: AH an error! Thanks ! love the feedback
- Katie

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Review #18, by nuvisionary Classroom Suprisies

4th May 2010:
Your story line is fine - but you really need a beta to help you find tiny mistakes that become distracting.

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Review #19, by nuvisionary Arriving at Hogwarts

2nd May 2010:
This story has a lot of potential. There are a couple of places in the story where you could have benefited from a beta reader. Some of your story telling dropped hints at the plot, but then contradicted themselves. It's a common problem that all writers must overcome - we forget where we are going because we forget about the reader. All in all, it is a good plot - I would suggest you move Heidi out a bit more from the trio - she is not a main character in canon. but you can make her a main character with Draco, which I am assuming you are doing.
One of my pet peeves - don't signal a flashback!! Gaa! I hate that. Your writing shows much better potential than that. Take the time to find a flashback in other literature and emulate it.
I currently beta one person who is writing something on SIYE. It is very fluffy - not really my cup of tea, but many people have reviewed him well. I think it has to do with his descriptions - something I harp on him to keep doing.
On thing that might help as well - I know this is somewhat odd, but...draw a story timeline. Use it to keep you on track - if you need to change it - change it - you won't publish it. But it's a nice tool to have when you need to remember where events happened and why.

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Review #20, by SlytherinRuby Arriving at Hogwarts

1st May 2010:
I like it, there was mabye too much information at the beginning. It may be better to let us learn some of that as the story progresses, but it sounds interesting and I look forward to more

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