Reading Reviews for Disillusioned
7 Reviews Found

Review #1, by UnderPolyJuice Disillusioned

20th February 2011:
Wow, that was truly beautiful.

It was like poetry.

I felt very close to Molly, and even though I've never gone through this she was just so... relatable

Keep writing, this was truly amazing.


Author's Response: Having been through something a bit like this, I sympathize with Molly very deeply, and I'm glad that the whole thing isn't so farfetched that other people can related to it as well.

I was also trying out a bit of a new style with the imagery here, and I'm happy it worked out so well!

Thanks so much for your review!

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Review #2, by ti2ger003 Disillusioned

23rd December 2010:
Okay, I'm going to open this thing up with this declaration: Teddy Lupin is Remus Lupin's kid, and even if he never knew the man, there is NO WAY he grows up to be a cheating slimeball. Yeah?

AND now that that's over with, I actually rather liked this piece. You know, other than the whole "Teddy is a cheating slimeball" bit, because it's Teddy LUPIN, for goodness' sake, and he's NOT a slimeball, alright?

(In case you hadn't noticed, Remus Lupin's one of my favorite people ever. :D )

But if I pretend that the "Teddy" in this story isn't Teddy Lupin, but some OTHER slimeball who HAPPENS to share the same first name... then, you know, it's pretty good. :P Molly's feelings feel so very REAL, the way you write them, and it's nice. Sometimes, when you read stuff, it's just kind of like the author's relating a person's feelings, but here, you FEEL how upset she is at how everything's turned out-- how her boyfriend turned out to be a cheating slimeball the whole time, how he's getting married to her cousin of all things, how this cousin is beautiful and lovely and part-Veela and everything Molly's not, how she's got to be in the wedding, wearing an ugly peach dress that isn't for her body at all, everything. And at the end, when Dan came out and comforted her? So nice. :)

(But it would've been much better if your cheating slimeball HADN'T been named "Teddy Lupin"... :P )

Merry Christmas!

Author's Response: Hmmm, I think regarding Teddy Lupin, we'll have to agree to disagree. While I don't really think he would have ended up badly, I also believe there is a chance that he could have turned out to be a spoiled jerk. Anyway, like I said, agree to disagree.

Otherwise, thanks so much for your review!


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Review #3, by amandatonks Disillusioned

30th November 2010:
I absolutely loved this! Your descriptions were wonderful. They really added to the story. And poor Molly! I truly felt for her. I could almost feel exactly as she felt when you described each of her reactions. The ending literally made me smile. I thought it was the perfect way to show that Molly will be able to recover from her heartache in time. It was so fortunate that Dan came to comfort her. This story is amazing, one of my favorites I have to say. It was the perfect way to make my day. :)

Author's Response: I'm so sorry I never replied to this! Somehow, I completely missed it. Many apologies!

This style of description was totally new for me, so I'm glad it seemed to add something to the overall story. Poor Molly, having been strung along for such a long time.

Dan is one of my absolute most squishable creations, and he was completely spur of the moment. I want my own Dan *sighs dreamily*

Thanks so much for the review! I'm sorry for the delay in responding and I'm happy you liked this so much!


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Review #4, by Misty_Rey Disillusioned

16th July 2010:
I thought this was completely brilliant!

Plot-wise, this was a relatively unique way of approaching the Teddy/Victoire, Teddy/Molly relationship. While I do ship Teddy/Victoire, I'm not totally opposed to pairing him with the other Weasleys. I thought it was especially clever that you weaved and overlapped his relationships with the two girls together, blurring the invisible romantic lines. It made the betrayal and Molly's bitterness even more heartbreaking than if he'd simply dumped her for Victoire, thus giving the entire thing more depth and complexity. To have been strung along like that for so many years while he himself was waiting for someone esle to want him... wow, that's harsh. Dan was a nice little addition though, ointment for the heart if you will ;). I liked the open-endedness of the ending, making the possibilities endless although it was a bit abrupt. Perhaps something smoother would have worked better? You have an amazing way with words though and once again, the imagery here was superb. 10/10!


Author's Response: Again, HOW DID I NEVER SEE THIS REVIEW? It's been here this whole time! Many, many apologies for not seeing/replying to this earlier.

It's great to hear that you enjoyed this! This is one of my favorite pieces that I've written and it's always good to see that other people enjoy it too.

Yes, I think that Molly's relationship with Teddy was really rough on her. In my mind, they were that couple that was always breaking up and getting back together endlessly, which can be wearing for anyone, but then to end the way they did, all on Teddy's terms is way harsh. The fact that it was Victoire, her close cousin, and not just some stranger made it all worse I think.

Aw! Dan. I love Dan. I've always had him in my mind as sort of a next gen OC, James II's best friend, and I was glad to be able to put him in here.

And to be truly honest, I wasn't quite sure how to end the whole thing, in fact, it plagued me for weeks. My usual policy is that, if something bothers me for that long, I just leave it. Either something will come to me, or it's just better the way it is. I still haven't thought of a better ending, but I definitely agree with you, it's a bit abrupt and sounds rather like a WWII recruitment poster...

Thanks for your review and your awesome feedback! I really appreciate it!


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Review #5, by SithHappens1292 Disillusioned

31st May 2010:
Oh. My. Idon'tevenknowwhattosay. Aka this is Steph. And you are amazing. I've NEVER been a fan of 2nd person writing, but here you've done splendidly. There is plenty of detail to understand the backstory, but not too much that it overwhelms the story. Also, your writing style in general is mature; grammar, vocabulary, syntax - it all fits together nicely. Overall beautiful job.

Author's Response: hahaha, thanks steph! I had a lot of fun writing this in 2nd person. Also, I kind of invented the back story as I went along, so I'm glad that it seemed to fit with the rest of the piece. Thanks again for R&R-ing and I'm happy you enjoyed this!

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Review #6, by FannyPrice Disillusioned

6th May 2010:
OH! I love the way you decided to end it! So open, so up-to-the-reader!! It's wonderful, it really is. I haven't read enough of Rachel to really tell you how much like her it is, but i do love the way it is written-artistic and rhythmic like. Very good.

Author's Response: Aw! Thanks Miranda! I wasn't sure how to finish it and someone (I forget who) told me to just leave it as it was. I'm glad they did because I think it leaves a certain amount of mystery. Also, writing this totally changed my use of sentence structure so cheers for noticing!

I'm glad you enjoyed this. Thanks for reviewing, my dear! I really appreciate it!


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Review #7, by The Empress Disillusioned

19th April 2010:
Hey Annie! Sorry it took me so long to get to this. Things have been CRAZY lately!

What a lovely story. Even though I'm not a big Ted/Vic fan, at all, I liked this. :) And yes, I am rather familiar with Rachel's style. Stalking her on a regular basis and all :P And I can say that you really pulled it off. So well done. The flow, description, everything was perfectly Rachel.

I also love that you did this in second person. I'm always a bit sceptical when I come across second person because it's so often mangled and the like. But this was so well done. And I love good story written from that POV. :D

You've grasped Molly's character very well. Again, very Rachel-esque. Of course, she is the queen of Molly, writes her all the time. Which I'm sure you took into consideration. You've written her beautifully here. The longing, the hurt, the realization at the end. GORGEOUS. Awww, Dan. Such a lovely ending.

Lovely story dear!

Author's Response: Sorry it took me a while to respond to this, Shiloh. Things here have been a bit busy lately.

I thought you might stalk Rachel often, which was why I'm glad you liked this and thought it was very her! I know Rachel doesn't usually use second person, so I tried to write it another way, but it really didn't work. I think this POV fits better here. She is definitely the queen of Molly and I was hesitant to try and write her knowing that that was Rachel's speciality but I'm glad I did! And Dan really is such a nice guy! I like him so much I'll have to find a reason to use him again.

Thanks so much for stopping by!


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