Reading Reviews for Best Laid Plans
15 Reviews Found

Review #1, by laine Best Laid Plans

9th November 2011:
Hello, again.
This was another great read. I have read all of the other parts of the Crusadiverse up to this point. Sorry to not have left reviews on all of them. I am not a great reviewer, (I feel I should say more then just I liked this story). They have all been great I like your writing style, and I really love how in character Harry, Ron, Hermione, and Ginny all are, yet still more mature. A Perfect example of this, is this story, Harry and Ron are Running the Auror Department,and making decisions about how to go about doing that, but don't know that the girls would be grieving no matter what there actual romantic status was if something were to happen to them. Its perfect and I love it.
Thanks again for sharing your talent with all of us.

Author's Response: Laine!

Thanks for the great review! Best Laid Plans has kind of been neglected in the Crusadiverse so its always great to hear from a reader in the course of reading through the series.

I'll let you in on a little secret - don't tell anyone ;) Don't feel bad about not reviewing every chapter. What makes my day is when I hear from someone who's reading through the series, here and there. It's kind of like getting a message from a submarine that surfaces now and then - its comforting to know they're still out there. LOL!

What I'm trying to say, in all seriousness, its just nice to hear, occasionally, that my stuff is being read and enjoyed. No worries otherwise!

Maturing the characters and still keeping them "in character" is not easy. Especially for Ron, he always needs special attention to make him feel "right." So it's really flattering to hear that praised. After I wrote Clocks and then Crusade, this was the first thing I wrote for the Crusadiverse. I had a great deal of trepidation when I first started on it - wasn't really sure if I was capturing what needed captured. Given this great review I assume that this has worked as well as the previous stories. I really appreciate that!

Thanks again! and I hope to hear from you again soon, even if its only "read it, liked/hated it." Its just nice to know that folks are reading what I wrote.


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Review #2, by NaidatheRavenclaw Best Laid Plans

12th August 2011:
This was hilarious!

I loved every sentence. The way you phrased them all were so like Harry and Ron, and it really showed their relationship to the best. This entire night just played out in my mind perfectly as you wrote it. And I was laughing all the way through. When it's Harry and Ron, and they're both drunk, it really can't be any other way XD

You really did have a deeper message in this, though. You brought one of Harry's character flaws to the surface. Because sometimes his attemps to protect the ones he loves go a little too far, and that's what you brought to this piece. You concealed it slightly with all the humor, but I love that it was in there.

Happy staff/prefect Friday and thanks for the incredible summer!
-NaidatheRavenclaw, Ravenclaw

Author's Response: Hello Naida!

And thank for this great review. Most of my writing is a bit of a "Harry and Ron buddy cop movie." I'm glad you enjoyed it.

Although they've both grown and matured and are now shouldering significant responsibilities in the Ministry, I've still tried to keep them both recognizable.

Yep, Harry still has the hero complex problem, but fortunately, Ron was able to get him to see reason. Although, in the next installment, "The Proposal," things go a bit pear-shaped. ;)

Thanks again!


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Review #3, by ericajen Best Laid Plans

15th August 2010:
I took it upon myself to check out another story. I hope I'm reading them in the right order? You should shoot me a PM or something telling me what order I should read them in(:

Anyway. This was really great! A far cry from the intense action scenes of Battle of the Pitch, but I'm glad to see Harry and Ron finally getting their acts together, LOL. No girl wants a boy to hold off a marriage proposal, war or no war. Glad to see that a drunken Ron can talk some sense into Harry.

I liked the Hagrid appearance. But then again, who doesn't like a Hagrid appearance? And the comment where Molly said Harry needs to finally make an honest woman out of Ginny, god, that was funny.

Great job, Eldy!

Author's Response: EJ!

Thanks so much for reading "Plans." It hasn't gotten much attention.

As to the order of the tales, it looks like you're right on track. Chronologically it goes "Pitch," "Plans," "Proposal," and then "Crusade." Although I didn't write them in that order. (Clocks can be read anytime, up until about the fourth chapter of Crusade and it'll make sense in the general scheme of things)

Anyways, I shot you a pm which directs you to a chronology for these tales I put at the end of the Author's Note at the end of Pitch. That should help.

Plans actually had its genesis from a rather minor comment during a discussion harry and ron had during Crusade. It was a little difficult to write because I needed to mature the characters, but still have them in a drunken conversation. As a result, Ron starts out as a little more "bufoonish" than I usually write him and Harry as a little more beligerent.

The Molly comment was one of my favorites. Glad you liked it.

Again, great to hear from you!


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Review #4, by edward ollivander Best Laid Plans

30th June 2010:
Oh they wouldn't! i should hope they would say yes. go get em boys. happy writing.

Author's Response: I really liked this little one shot. Glad you liked it too. Will the girls say yes?

Only "The Proposal" will tell...

Thanks again


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Review #5, by whisky Best Laid Plans

21st May 2010:
OK, I AM READING THE WHOLE SERIES NOW!! WOOT WOOT! and why in the name of merlins saggy baggy Y-fronts, would they say NO? hehehehe you just never see it happening like that...ok now im gna go read MORE! :)

Author's Response: Looks like I've got you intrigued! Excellent. I really love having new readers run into this story line and get pulled in. That means a lot. Thanks!

And, as for them saying "no," anythings possible in this 'verse. Hehehehe.


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Review #6, by bedella Best Laid Plans

15th May 2010:
Hmm...that was weird. I didn't mean to send the review (I wasn't finished!) Let me finish it up!

As I was saying, you added Draco! You are awesome. Everyone forgets about him in NG, so kudos to you for remembering him. And I'm glad Harry and Ron are partially letting him off the hook!

Harry and Ginny have a psychic link? I've read a thousand stories where this has occured, and when you throw the knowledge around in a one-shot like this, it's not important. It's also cliche, unless it has significant meaning in your other story. And Harry called Ron "Ronald"? That's more of a Hermioine-ish thing to do, but maybe it's because of the mead...

“Slainte!” all the patrons of The Three Broomsticks shouted.

Slainte? Is that a bar saying? Or do you mean silent? I'm not trying to be mean, I honestly don't know. I might be going through one of those "Dumb-Blonde" moments :)

The ending was so adorable! "What if the girls say no?" Wowzers. You certaintly know how to get people to read your stories :) I do wonder what the girls will say as well; I'm guessing "yes".

Very good job and I am glad to have read it. It was a very cute and short story. Thank you for requesting it!


Author's Response: Malfoy - yep, he was crucial and I thought he deserved a little forgiveness (but not much!)

The link was always a flourish I liked; as its in the other tales, I had to have it here, but I didn't want to waste too much time dwelling on it, just enough to get the point across.

The use of "Ronald" was due to drink as well as frustration - Harry was chanelling a little Hermione there. LOL!

Slainte -its gaellic, it means "health," since Hogsmeade is in Scotland, I figured I could get away with it here. No apologies necessary! Justanothermuggle and siledubghlase use it often in their fanfic and I liked it, once I figured out what it meant.

Really glad you liked this little tale- its kind of a teaser for my other stories. Thanks again and I hope to see you on the forums!


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Review #7, by bedella Best Laid Plans

15th May 2010:
Hello! Thank you for welcoming me to the forums! As nice as you were, I couldn't hold of reading your story any longer! And here is the review for it...voila!

Ninety-nine percent of me felt like you were aiming for canon, which you excelled at. I'm not completely certain if the time periods are right, but the fact that Harry and Ron end up as aurors was very true. That along with them getting married. Good job :) I'm also thrilled you tackled Hagrid; you nailed the speech.

The first few lines were a bit awkward, but partially because of the overwhelming drunkedness. Like, something like that popping out of the first paragraph...but once I had the hang of it it was quite enjoyable. It was hard to imagine Harry drunk. He's so innocent that whenever I picture it, he takes an uneasy sip and nervously sets it down.

Aww, I loved Mrs. Weasley. I couldn't stop giggling as Ron imitated her. An honest woman out of her daughter? She should be more worried about Ginny corrupting him to be honest.

There were various parts when Harry said, "gonna". It's more American slang unless you were showing intoxicated Harry speech. Hm. And as soon as Ron talked to Harry about the proposal, it was as if they weren't drunk at all. There was no slurring, tripping, clumsiness, puking, lopsided smiles, or glassed over eyes. But I love the idea of Ron talking Harry about proposing. It's uber cute :)

You also mentioned Malfoy, which brightened my day

Author's Response: Wow! That was quick. And thanks for this great review!

Yeah, I try to stay as close to canon as possible, but I've conjured up this guerilla war to make things more interesting and to keep the characters a little more on edge. Hence, the drinking.

Yeah, I liked the irony of the "honest woman" line. LOL. Glad it caught your eye.

Gonna - its somthing I struggle with, I know it can sound american, but "going to" just feels so stilted. As for the sobriety, I attribute that to the topic. It seems to me serious subjects tend to have a sobering effect, as it did here.

Malfoy...Well, I'll just wrap this response up in the second review!


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Review #8, by harrylilyjames Best Laid Plans

8th May 2010:
Here with my review!!

OMG, seriously. I couldn't stop the grin that came onto my face when I read the start of this. Awe, it's so cute.

Firs ickle typo I spotted, was that you wrote “Broom Sticks.” instead of “Broomsticks”

Why did the people in the pub shout “Slainte”- that's Irish for health. They're english, and not in Scotland, so I think it's a bit oddly placed.

Oh and I have a feeling that 'Old Odgens” is a pint rather than a 'shot'.

I think you wrote Hagrid wonderfully.

I don't know about Ron coming with the idea that the 'two' of them propose to the girls. I think it's just kind of none of his business when Harry proposes to Ginny. It would be more likely if he just said that “he should propose to Hermione”, and then probably ask when Harry was going to do the same thing.

Oh, and since when has Ron called Harry, 'Potter'? Sorry, I just thought that was a bit out of character for him to say.

Harry didn't become head till 2007, James was around two and Albus was probably on the way. So he and Ginny would of gotten married before he was considered to becoming Head.

The saying ”merlin turncoats?” it sounds a bit old fashioned.

The time-frame of this scene is a bit off, it's saying it's been 'four years' after the battle. So everyone would of been married by now, and Harry and Ginny would be married and have the two boys.

But the scene itself is written really well, and you wrote their drunken speech amazingly.

The ending was perfect, it's so them to think up of everything and then think of the consequences of it not going to plan It's a really cute idea.

Author's Response: Thanks for reviewing and I'm glad I got you grinning.

Actually, Hogsmeade is in Scotland, so the gaelic here is appropriate. Old Ogden's is Firewhiskey, not an ale; generally, spirits are not consumed by the pint. That could be a bit dangerous. LOL.

You might have missed it, but the point of their engagement discussion is that both Harry and Ron have decided that they're going to act in concert with regard to proposing. Given how close the four of them are now, one couple proposing without the other could cause some friction. Also, Ron's reasoning for agreeing to this is more fully developed in the story that follows this, "The Proposal."

Ron referred to Harry as "Potter" in GoF; I thought it appropriate here given their argument. As for Harry becoming Head Auror, all we know is that he became head "before" 2007, not necessarily, "in" 2007. Again, there is no clear indication as to exactly when everyone got married after DH, but James was not born before 2002 and not after 2005, per HPwiki. Trust me, I'm largely epilogue compliant, except I threw "All was well" out the window. LOL. But frankly, I've never been that wedded to towing the line on "canon" based on what little we know from JKR's interviews and the Epilogue. I'm sorry you got distracted by the minutiae, but I'm glad it got you smiling and I do appreciate you taking the time to read and review.


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Review #9, by You Know Who Best Laid Plans

2nd May 2010:
Oh, don't Dumbledore me!

Best line yet.

Author's Response: That's one of my favorites too. hehehe.

Really glad you stopped by to keep up with the Children's Crusade Universe. Next up: The Battle of the Pitch. Hope to hear from you after finals.


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Review #10, by Jane_Volturi Best Laid Plans

11th April 2010:
Hi, this is JaneTwilight here from the forums with your review.

When I first read the story synopsis on your request form I was very intrigued. The situation it spoke of seemed exactly like something Harry would experience, I mean, after seven years of constant events relating to Voldemort and his Death Eaters it's bound to be hard for him to get his life back on track. This is the mistake that I think so many people tend to make whenever they're writing a post-war fanfiction. They make it seem so cliche; Harry marries Ginny straight away, Ron marries Hermione, they all have children and everything is amazing. It's really refreshing to read a story that keeps in mind the fact that Harry has just bore witness to the death of countless individuals that he has in the past considered to be close to him. It's good to see that you've made things realistic, that you've created this barrier between the present Harry and his happily-married future because there are still so many Death Eaters roaming around out there. This is what I liked about Harry's characterization in this story; it was realistic. His behavior and reasoning kind of reminded me of the scene at the end of HBP when he broke up with Ginny to protect her.

I also think you did a great job of charcterizing Ron. He was never one to take things as serious as Harry so the fact that he still wanted to propose to Hermione given the situation was understandable.

You have a very good writing style, it's very informative and descriptive and I can get a clear picture in my mind of what's going on. I couldn't spot any mistakes either and your storyline in general was great. It's easy to imagine this actually happening after the books are finished.

10/10 for this flawless chapter, I honestly could not find anything to critisize. Great Job!


Author's Response: Wow! Thanks Jane, this is an amazing review.

I really wanted to do somthing different with the Post Hogwarts genre. I had a devil of a time figuring out what that would be. I finally stumbled on an AU theme that resulted in a short story called "Stop All The Clocks." The way that fic ended allowed me to write a more "canon" sequel, "Children's Crusade," for which this one shot is a prequel.

I'm really glad you thought the back story and characterizations worked. It ocurred to me that a guerilla war was really the only logical conclusion to DH and it, fortunately, gave the characters a fair amount to do afterwards. As a result, I'd figure Harry would still be on a noble I-have-to-protect Ginny kick. As for Ron, I figured he'd still be impulisive, but much more mature-no longer a punch line, for the most part.

I'm really flattered you liked this.

Thanks again!


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Review #11, by TheDirigiblePlum Best Laid Plans

5th April 2010:
"What if the girls say no?"

Haha they do all this thinking and pondering and planning as to why they are finally allowed to propose and then Hermione and Ginny say no! Aw that'd be priceless. Poor Harry and Ron.

I love reading good drunken conversations, especially when they include some form of apology or profound realisation. Like when Ron apologised to Harry about not understanding his fame and it was so obvious he'd said it many times before! They're such a great pair. :D

Great to see another story from you! Really enjoyed this.

Author's Response: DP! Great to hear from you.

This was entirely too much fun to write. After I finished Crusade I wanted to do a little fluff. I also thought there would be a good one-shot about how they finally decided to bite the bullet and propse to the girls, even though the war was still going on.

I'm really glad you liked it and pointed out some of my favorite parts.

I'm really looking forward to more "Insensitive Teaspoons" and "Wrong End of the Wand" and "Fairytales" too. I love your stuff.

Thanks for the great review!

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Review #12, by AvadaKedavra1 Best Laid Plans

4th April 2010:
Hey Hey!

Another fine story my friend! This really is a nice teaser to both Clocks and Crusade. It sets the mood, and the characters are both believable and consistant with your other writings. Readers should find any transition from this into your other works, seemless.

I still cant get over how afraid they are. Ron and Harry. Almost too afraid to move, too afraid to do nothing, yet knowing they have to do something.

Good for them.

Great stuff as always mate!


Author's Response: AK is in the house!

I really liked this tale. It practically wrote itself. It started with the image of Harry telling a crowd of revellers about Ron and Hermione's first kiss, right in the middle of the Battle of Hogwarts and then everything else just fell into place.

I'm really glad you thought the transition between this and my other stories was smooth. I was concerned about that. I was afraid the "drunk" version of Harry and Ron might not look similar enough to what comes in Crusade (and The Proposal, which I just posted - its planned as a two chapter short story that picks up a week or so after Plans.)

Afraid? Yes. Not of the Death Eaters, but of hurting their women. In Crusade, they touch on this a bit when Ron and Harry are on the beach at Shell Cottage. Ron tells Harry that, during the Battle of Diagon Alley the previous night, that he really was worried they weren't going to make it and that maybe they'd rushed in too soon with proposing to the girls. It seemed to me that there was a nice one shot in that exchange between them.

Thanks so much for the great review and I know I need to return the favor with A Muggle's Wand.

Folks, you absolutely must read AK's Novel, A Muggle's Wand. It is brilliant! It also inspired some of the fight scenes in my novel "Crusade." Do yourselves a favor and read it!

Thanks mate,


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Review #13, by blueirony Best Laid Plans

2nd April 2010:
You are so cheeky! With that comment, "If you know what to do, check my other, very long novel out." Shamelessly plugging your own work. Ah, well. I would do the same thing, so I can't blame you!

I liked this. I really did. This may seem a bit of a stupid thing to say considering you yourself are a man, but you're very good at writing men.
Yeah. I just read over what I said and it does, indeed, sound quite stupid.
But it's true. I think I understand men (operative word: think) but I don't think I can get that cavalier bloke-ness that you bring to your stories. Maybe it's because you yourself are a man or it's because you understand humans or a bit of both, I don't know - but what I do know is that it works.

God, look at me. I have spent all this review talking about the fact that you are a man and can write about men. I am sorry.

This was cute. And funny. Not cute, actually. But kind of... I don't know. You have this way of talking about really sinister things like a war and putting humour into it. I mean, they're in a pub and they're both drunk. And they're considering life-changing decisions, the war that has plagued them for so long is about to end and they're... they're drunk!
Trust you, TEW, trust you. Haha.

I liked this, though. It wasn't anything too intense or required me to hold my breath for the entire thing, but it was light-hearted and I enjoyed it. It's one of those stories that leave you with a hopeful feeling and smile on your face when you have finished reading them.
Especially the last line. Ha. That made me chuckle.

Hope that we hear more from you soon!

Joop :]

Author's Response: Joop! Thanks for dropping by!

Yep, I am shamelessly trying to grab more readers for Crusade. Guilty as charged.

The man thing. Well, lets just say I have a lot of experience (all from books) of guy conversations over beers. LOL.

I really think I've found my niche: the Harry/Ron buddy cop movie.

I'm glad this tale struck you the way it did. The emotional flow turns on a dime throughout (not a little because they've had too much Old Ogden's and mead) but, generally, I like to think of their way of talking about these kind of issues as an outgrowth of how they've managed to cope with the stresses of the guerilla war: gallows humor and a willingness to be extremely honest with each other.

I like writing fluff after finishing off an emotional roller coaster and this was the answer.

There is more to come. I have another one-shot that takes place about one week after this one: Ron and Harry are trying to figure out how to propose and working on the plan that will eventually lead to the Battle of Diagon Alley in Crusade. I hope to have it up soon.

Thanks again for the great review!


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Review #14, by siledubhghlase Best Laid Plans

31st March 2010:
Very nice, TEW! A day in the life, as it were. It was a perfect balance of Ron being Ron and Harry being Harry...but with a maturity that befits the times and what they've been through.

Harry's still dwelling on "what if," while Ron's ready to throw caution to the wind, make like Nike, and "just do it." I like how he managed to convince Harry to stop qualifying his own life and realize that no situation is perfect. There's always going to be danger and uncertainty, but that's the lot of an Auror.

I think this discussion also caused Harry to recognize that Ginny and Hermione are two very strong witches who understand that their wizards' profession is dangerous, but want to stand by them rather than hide away from the realities of marriage to--essentially--a soldier.

With Harry's and Ginny's bond-link, if he's killed, she'd follow anyway, married or not. Harry also realized that. Ron finally took control of a situation and asserted himself in a mature and logical manner, which allowed him to take the lead for once.

They'd promised one another that when the time came to propose, they'd take the plunge together, but Ron's tired of waiting. He loves Hermione and wants to make her his wife. By the same token, he believes Harry needs to get off his rear end, stop making excuses based on "what if" and make an "honest woman" of his sister.

I think Ron intimated here that he was going to propose whether Harry did or not, which kind of guilted Harry into it in the end. But Ron was also able to make Harry see reason and that was the crux of this whole thing. Harry just needed to get over himself.


Author's Response: SD! Sorry it took me so long to respond, but I wanted to wait until the April Fool's Day prank was over, just in case there were any glitches once they put things back together.

I just realized I've found my niche writing HP fanfic: the Harry/Ron buddy cop movie. This thing jumped into my head on a Friday morning and pretty much wrote itself; I posted it on Saturday as a prequel for the canon reality characters in "Crusade." There's another one that takes place a week later I hope to have posted soon. It still doesn't have a title.

I liked writing Ron as a little more "Ron" here, thanks largely to Mr. Ogden. Likewise with Harry. You caught their motivations perfectly. Harry, always the nobley overcautious type and Ron, wanting to leap without looking. I'm glad you thought they still looked properly matured. And yes, Ron, oh so subtly, was saying he wanted Harry to make an "honest woman" of his sister. Even tho he's over the jealous brother problem, he's still protective and rightly so.

As for the link (which was inspired by yours and JAM's excellent writing), keep in mind, no one's sussed out that if Harry dies, Gin would too. That doesn't get addressed until later in Crusade. I want to make that clear, because, I think if Harry had known that earlier, he probably wouldn't have become an Auror out of fear of hurting Gin.

Thanks so much for dropping by and leaving an AWESOME review.


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Review #15, by 1917farmgirl Best Laid Plans

28th March 2010:
Firstly, I must tell you, I'm a little out of practice giving reviews. Haven't had the time lately to read anything, let alone give reviews, so I hope this isn't a let down.

Secondly, I absolutly LOVE this story. Honestly! You amaze me. I've read all your stuff (that you've posted) and everytime you put something up it just gets better and better. The writing seemed so effortless, the dialogue so natural, and I could honestly see the whole thing playing out before me. How do you do that? Can you teach me?

Remember me mentioning how freakin' funny your lines can be? Well, you did it again! I completely love Ron and Harry how you write them, especially when they are talking together. A slightly drunk Ron and Harry...can I tell you I laughed so hard at a few points in this that people who aren't supposed to know about this obcession are now asking what on earth I'm reading and now why I'm typing so much when I'm only supposed to be listening to music... BRAVO!

Aw.George was mentioned! *huge grin* The part where Harry thinks Ron as put the plan in action TONIGHT! Bloody brilliant! Now, if only you could have gotten Fred in there... LOL

I love how you can go from funny to serious in about two words and not have it feel abrupt. That's such a credit to your writing ability, because that's how life is. No nice transitions, no nice set-ups. Just bam, bam, bam, however it wants to come at you. To write like that, and still have it seem polished and such... *Takes off hat and bows in eldy's direction*

Thanks for another great Eldy tale! I read your stuff and get scared to write myself because I know I can't measure up. :)

Author's Response: Farmgirl! So glad you dropped by and thanks for this AMAZING review.

This story just jumped in my head Saturday morning and it had to be written. Its genesis is Chapter 3 of Crusade, where Ron and Harry are talking about whether they moved too quickly by asking the girls to marry them before all the troubles were over. It just seemed to me that Ron would've had to be the one to give Harry the necessary push to get it done.

Then I got this strong image of Harry and Ron surrounded by people at the Broomsticks, while Harry tells the story about R/Hr's first kiss. "Is this the moment?" Everything after that just fell into place.

I love writing Ron and Harry. Maybe I should do a slash one-shot? LOL. Its gotten easier and easier to write them ever since "Gordon." Not altogether sure why that is. It seems my muse has just tapped into them.

Really glad I got you laughing, but I hope it doesn't "out" you. LOL. I purposely put that George line in there for you! Glad you spotted it (as if you wouldnt!).

I simply couldn't resist letting Harry think Ron had set up the operation for that night, without telling Harry. Devilish, I know, but too much fun!

As to the ease of writing the dialogue, lets just say I have some experience as to how bar conversations can turn on a dime. LOL. But thanks so much for the praise.

And Farmgirl? Never, NEVER sell your writing abilities short. I agree with Alo, you are the BEST emotion-writer out here in Potterdom. Which is why getting praise like this from you is all the sweeter.

Best wishes, sis, and I hope you're feeling better!


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