I've been meaning to read this forever, as well as one of the most beautiful banners I've ever seen, your summary and premise are incredibly intriguing. I'm very glad the review chain let me get to this piece. It's v brief because I am @uni, but I shall be stalking your page as school eases up ♥

I absolutely loved it. It's so dark, and so compelling and very very charged with tension and desire. You have a very flawed but not unlikable Alice and the end made me shiver all over. I enjoyed it tremendously and I desperately want more! I can't wait to see how this unfolds!

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Hi Ayii!
This is a very promising start. I simply love your characterization of Alice. There's something not quite right with her. On one hand, she seems as though she's completely reliant on Roldophus. Obsessed, really. However, as the same time, I can't help but feel that she is a truly strong woman underneath it all. Her little act of defiance at the end was just fantastic.

Other than that, I only noticed a few minor typos. Nothing that can't be fixed with some editing.^_^ Your grammar, syntax and overall writing was style was great. I really enjoyed this first chapter. Please update soon!

Best,
celticbard

Author's Response: Hey! Thank you very much, I thought I'd give her a different characterisation from what I usually see. I will definitely go back over and do some editing, and thank you for the review! I shall try to update soon.

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Cool start. I can't wait to see where this story goes. Brilliant idea. Thanx, Icequeencissa

Author's Response: Thank you!

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