Reading Reviews for Behind Enemy Lines
30 Reviews Found

Review #1, by smilinsteph Ill

4th June 2011:
i was on yuotube abd found your trialer i realy like this story it is amazing i l o v e it.
well done
hope you continue soon

Author's Response: Thank you :) I'm glad you liked it.

x Ely

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Review #2, by naflower05 Ill

15th May 2011:
Awww, sad. But good chapter! I can't wait for this action you speak of, so update again soon!! =]

Author's Response: Thank you! I will try and get it up very soon.

x Ely

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Review #3, by naflower05 Chambers

19th April 2011:
good chapter!! i wonder how she's going to explain what happened to pandora, since she was out with her when she was kidnapped. cant wait for more, update again soon! =]

Author's Response: Thank you! Ah, t'is a secret. I'll be updating soon!

x Ely

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Review #4, by PurpleDusk Chambers

17th April 2011:
Hello again!! Anyways, great chapter, really short though :(

Author's Response: GEMMA! Thank you lil' sis.

Love you too :P

x Ely

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Review #5, by naflower05 Home

15th April 2011:
good chapter! it's sad that he doesnt even realize she was gone, update again soon, i cant wait for more! =] ~

Author's Response: Thank you! It's quite horrible isn't it? The next chapter is in the queue right now. Thank you again for the review!

x Ely

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Review #6, by PurpleDusk Home

4th April 2011:
Heyyo Ely!
Great chapter :) Make her choose Sirius!! He's hotter and older and played by Gary Oldman.Gary freakin' Oldman! haha
ILY talk to you soon

Author's Response: GEMS!
Thank you my amazing lil' sis. I still don't know who to make her choose :( Besides you're totally just saying that because you don't want to be alone Pads. :P

ily too.

x Ely

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Review #7, by PurpleDusk Decision

23rd March 2011:
I love this chapter. Sirius' motorbike, I want it :)
...Sirius Black...'nuf said xD
love you Ely

Author's Response: Hehe! I'm so glad you love it sweetie!

x Ely

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Review #8, by naflower05 Decision

21st March 2011:
yay!! great chapter!! and i loved that it was longer! and holy crap she chose!! Have fun at art camp, I cant wait for more, so update as soon as you get back!!! Haha. =]

Author's Response: Thank you so much! I'm so glad you loved it and I'll update very soon!

x Ely

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Review #9, by AquariaJasmyne Victoria

23rd February 2011:
Ohhh, Lizzie is liking the start of this XD She must read on!
Lizzie is really interested to see where you take Regulus' characterisation in this - she hasn't read much of him before :P
Onwards march to the next chapter!
-PR Lizzie x

Author's Response: YAY LOVABLE LIZZIE!
Thank you so much sweetie!


x Ely

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Review #10, by naflower05 Sorry

15th February 2011:
good chapter. i still think you should make them longer, but oh well. update again soon!! =]

Author's Response: i'm working on making them longer very slowly. thank you.

x ely

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Review #11, by Jenna822 Victoria

11th February 2011:
Gotta say, I like Victoria. She seems flawed and human, while still being a strong character. I also like your take on Regulus. He's so sweet and loving while still holding that Death Eater core. He seems quite likable yet also flawed, so your characters aren't overly Sue or annoying. They're relatable and I find myself wanting to invest in what happens to them. What I admire about Victoria is that she's willing to accept Regulus for everything he is/does because she loves him. This is a very nice start. I'd have liked a bit more description, appearance-wise, but I'm a description junkie. Lol. Good strong start! --Jenna

Author's Response: Well thank you. Victoria is one of my favourite characters that I've ever written. Thank you for the review :)

x Ely

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Review #12, by _hedwig_ Kiss

9th December 2010:
Uhm...say whaaat?



You're so evil. I hope you explain his motives.

Author's Response: Hehe. The next chapter won't be out until next year but I'll make sure it's the first thing I post :)

x Ely

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Review #13, by _hedwig_ Prison

9th December 2010:
I am a pure, kindhearted Gryffindor. Please don't take us for people who'll do anything to catch Death Eaters. No Gryffindor-bashing!

Also, I'm glad that you made her stronger. She can fight for herself! Hooray!

I hope you develop James and Lily more! I sortakindamaybe love James. And Lily! But James, too. So, please develop him.


I'm glad you developed Reg more, too. I agree with what you said about him.

The characters are good!

Author's Response: It was on Dumbledore's orders, trust me there's a good reason behind it but I admit I'm half Slytherin, half Gryffindor.

Yes, I love writing Vic when she's strong and Slytherin-like.

Haha, Don't worry I defintely will in the upcoming chapters.

Well thank you!

x Ely

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Review #14, by _hedwig_ Kidnapped

9th December 2010:
oh no! what's going to happen? i'm freaking out!

i would've liked to know more about her job. maybe what role she plays in the office? just a suggestion, to give Vic more character.

i wonder where Reg is? if i were you, i might make her a little bit more upset about the fact that her boyfriend left.

other than that, you're on the right track!

Author's Response: Haha!

I couldn't really find much out about the Department of Mysteries, so I wasn't quite sure what I could have her do.

She's sort of used to it by now, but it is a good point! Thank you

x Ely

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Review #15, by _hedwig_ Mornings

9th December 2010:
This chapter is a bit filler, but you're developing Reg and Victoria's characters more, which I like. I like her job at the Ministry. It'll be interesting to find out what she does at work!

Author's Response: Vic is probably one of my favourite characters to write so I'm glad you like her. I orginially had her working at the Daily Prophet but this fits in better.

Thank you again!

x Ely

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Review #16, by _hedwig_ Victoria

9th December 2010:
Hey! This is narcissablackmalfoy with your review!

Alright, I'm going to nip this in the bud right now:

I know that she's his boyfriend, so she's going to love everything about him. But...

No "unflawed face and perfect grey eyes," please. It made me feel like a schmoe who reads cliche'd fics.

Also, I hope her character gets stronger as the story goes on.

The flow is good, and your writing is good! Great job!

Author's Response: Hey!

Good point, now that you mention it doesn't quite fit into the rest of the plot.

She does, at least I hope so.

Thank you so much for reviewing!

x Ely

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Review #17, by naflower05 Kiss

28th November 2010:
yay!!! great chapter!!! so they have a history together, eh? well that'll make things interesting. i just hope she doesn't leave regulus for sirius. that would piss me off, so dont do that!! anyways, i cant wait to hear more, so update super speedy-like!!! =]

Author's Response: Oh yes, it will be explored more in detail in the next chapter with a few flashbacks and such. I'm unsure as to what is going to happen in the end, It depends what I work out.

x Ely

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Review #18, by loopyluna Kiss

28th November 2010:
I really enjoyed it! Of course I did! Don't be silly :P :D
I have been awaiting this update with anticipation, actually on the edge of my seat! I love this story!
I am in love with Sirius and Lily in this chapter, Lily seems like such a lovely soul and Sirius has really cleared up.
Lily's description of how she empathises with Victoria is beautiful, I've never seen it before, and a fresh idea in a Marauders story is rare :P :D But you've nailed it completely! I can't wait to read more!
Good luck in NanoWriMo.

Author's Response: Wow thank you!
I was really nervous as to what people would think about this story and especially this chapter so I'm glad you like it!
I wanted to make Lily sort of different to a lot of the other stories I've read and written, the main character either hates her with a passion and they become best friends or their insantly best friends in their first year so I wanted to make Victoria and Lily's friendship different.
I actually gave up a while ago, I couldn't make it pass 5,000 with exam stress and all :/

x Ely

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Review #19, by loopyluna Prison

14th November 2010:
Oooh! I love where this is going. Your characterisation of Regulus is so unique, I love it. He's sweet enough to love, yet not in a way that is sickly sweet, he's still a bad boy :P and of course there is the whole, him being a Death Eater thing ...
But Sirius :O (that's me being shocked!) how could you take an innocent girl like that?! :O Yet, even from their small encounter, I am actually buzzing with excitement for them to get together!
Pretty please update soon! But of course, good luck on NaNoWriMo - if good luck is the right thing to say :/ But still, great story! :D

Author's Response: Thank you so much for your review!

He's sort of how I always imagined him really. I usually write Sirius as the player who still has a heart but I thought I'd kinda go for something a tad different. Haha, That's a while away. I'm hoping to update before Christmas but this week is exam week so it depends on my muse and such. Thanks for the lovely review.

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Review #20, by naflower05 Prison

31st October 2010:
great chapter!!! still wish they were longer, but oh well. I'm doing NaNoWriMo too!!! good luck!! =] Update soon!!

Author's Response: they're slowly getting longer. good luck to you too! and thanks for reviewing!

x Ely

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Review #21, by naflower05 Kidnapped

23rd October 2010:
great chapter! i cant wait for the next one, so update soon! perhaps make the chapters a little longer? whatever, its your choice. =] ~

Author's Response: the next one is in the queue right now and I have the chapter after that written too. thanks for the review!

x ely

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Review #22, by Danceinggirl109 Kidnapped

16th October 2010:
The OC is good but I feel like the first two chapters were shallow and didn't really get into her background and feelings. The third chapter was better because you started to get into her feelings about how Regulus was treating her.

The plot is pretty good so far and the third chapter really starts to develop it. I can't wait for more, keep on writing because the story is getting really good now! :D


Author's Response: You do have a point there, the real background of her is coming in chapter five and the ending of chapter four will reveal as to why that is.

Thank you so much for your lovely review!

x Ely

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Review #23, by naflower05 Mornings

21st September 2010:
you finally updated!!! good chapter! update again soon please!!!

Author's Response: yes, it took me awhile *blushes* I've started writing chapter three but I have a few other things to update before this one. Should be up soon though. Thanks for the review!

x Ely

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Review #24, by WhatAboutRegulus Mornings

18th September 2010:
Another review :),

Alright I don't think I saw any mistakes in this chapter, just that you should add more description. I don't know why, but it is missing something hmmm. It is very good though, but also short :P Why not make it longer! Get more stuff in there!!

I think that the characters are really good so far. Victoria seems nice and just a typical lover and Regulus seems like the awesomely amazing Regulus we all want to know and love :)

The flow was pretty good, just more description would be nice and longer chapters might help the flow if you are looking to improve it!

Sorry I saw you answered my other review and this one is kind of late. . . Whoops! Don't want to get into that story!

Great Job!!


Author's Response: Ha, Welcome back.

Yeah, I was having a bit of trouble with this chapter so I might add a bit of the next chapter onto the end to make it longer.

Well thank you, They are both sort of innocent at the moment and they'll start to develop in the next few chapters.

The next few chapters are becoming more and more action filled.

That's alright, You reviewed and that's all that matters really.

Thank you!

x Ely

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Review #25, by WhatAboutRegulus Victoria

17th September 2010:
Hiya MidnightBlue_x review time finally!

First. . .

tall figure standing by the tall lamp her grandmother had gave(n) her.

The figure seemed to be male, (it) was facing the opposite to direction to Victoria.(he, you already identified him as a boy, so it shouldn't be an it!! :P)

I really like this story a lot. I think it is very orignal and a lot of people forget Regulus. As you can tell I love Regulus :). I think that you can use more description in some parts of the first paragraph and possibly if it got to long cut it into more than one paragraph. Don't want it to long! I like how Regulus is a romantic, I love those kinds of stories. . . HOPLESS ROMANTIC :D.

Overall I thought it was really well written. Wicked good. Just the description needs some work, add more :)



Author's Response: Hey,

Thanks for pointing those out for me. I also love Regulus and I hate it when people forget about him too. *dabs eyes* He's a great character. Yes, I should add a bit more in. Thank you so much for reviewing!

x Ely

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