This was so so so beautiful. I am adding this to my favourites asap. The colour imagery was just stunning, the relationship between Scorpius and Dom was so subtle yet spoke volumes, and your writing style is beyond excellence.
The ethereal, whimsical nature of the piece and the flow and feel of the story was just perfect. Despite the slight lack of setting, I could picture it perfectly. The again subtle closeness of the two was amazing, especially with the continuation of the colour imagery used to demonstrate it.
This was amazing. Perhaps one of my favourite things on the entire archives, Loved it. Report Review
If this is what happens when you're lacking sleep, you should never ever go to sleep! Because my dear, this was gorgeously written. I've always found it so difficult to write description and you do it beautifully. I think I'll read a few others of your stories because this is one of the best written pieces I've read on this site! Now I've gone all depressed, because I won't ever be able to write like this, ever. God, this was beautiful.Author's Response: Thank you! Ha, when I lack sleep, all kinds of randomness comes out and I swear that accounts for most of the stuff on my author's page. In retrospect, this one-shot tend to embarrass me when I reread them, but thank you! Your review made me feel much more at ease about it!
The green I never was. Actually made me think of Scorpius as the painted one and Dominique as the painter. The ocean eyes gave me the last clue in the end. :)
I really love your work and I actually copied them into a document and saved so I could read it on my Ipod.
I really wish I was as good as you are. :)
LaraAuthor's Response: Thanks so much! :) Wow, that's a really sweet compliment! I hope you enjoyed reading it and whatever else you have on your iPod!
Celeste Report Review
I loved this one-shot.
Beautiful, metaphorical, original.
Perfect? Yeah :)
xxx sofiaAuthor's Response: Oh, thank you so much! I'm ecstatic you found it beautiful, even if it's far from perfect. :) Report Review
Ooh, this was pretty. I really liked the mixture of first and second person narrative in it. I've written a one-shot using first and second before (ironically a Dominique/Scorpius/Rose), and I think it can be a great device for writing. It really makes it interesting.
All of the imagery in this was so beautiful. I mean, the whole thing was like artwork. Which works so well because they're painting in it. I really liked that about it. How the writing reflected the story so well. That was great.
Also, in my mind, Scorpius was the painter and Dominique the painted. I'm not sure why. That's just where my mind went automatically. I didn't even think about it until I got to the author's note and you asked who we thought was who.
Great one-shot! :)Author's Response: Thanks Erica!
Scorminique is a treasure, I'll tell you! And nobody really likes it when I go out on my Scorminique raves, because ScoRose is so popular and all, but I'm glad I have a Scorminique supporter in the fray!
Thank you so much for the review and the lovely feedback! :) Report Review
Aw, I love this! I have been reading a lot of angst lately and needed this :)
In my mind Scorpius was painting Dominique
Good job with this :)Author's Response: Aww, thanks so much! ^_^ I appreciate your kind words! Report Review
It was very pretty. I loved the idea of them painting each other. It was romantic and poetic.
I personally felt like Dominique was being painted, and he was the painter. There was something masculine about his statements and the way he didn't care.
Also, the inner monologue seemed feminine to me. How about you? How did you see it?
Thank you for writing this, it was touching. My favourite phrase was 'To Birds the earth is the sky'. I've never thought about it like that.
-Grins-Author's Response: Wow, I'm so sorry for the extremely late response!
Haha, the responses have really been varied on who's Dominique and who's Scorpius.
To me, the painted one was Scorpius, but I wrote it so that it could serve a dual purpose.
Thank you so much for reviewing! It means so much that you liked it!
- Celeste Report Review
That was lovely, Celeste, really. I loved the whole story line, it flowed in a way such as a painting, very fluid and whimsical. You have amazing skills with descriptions and imagery that I envy immensely! I also loved how it was so open ended, that the reader could choose to see it how they wanted, who each character was in their mind, instead of being told one way of the other. I suppose I saw it as Scorpius was the 'I' and Dominique was the 'You'. I don't know why, other then after the first three lines I pictured Scorpius narrating.
I really enjoyed this, darling. It was a beautiful piece! So sweet and simply divine.
ColletteAuthor's Response: Collette!
Sorry for the extremely late response! Wow, thank you so much! What are you envious of? You're a much better writer than I am! I saw Scorpius as the narrator too, though I've heard otherwise from other reviews.
I'm so pleased you liked it! And I do hope you'll try out this ship yourself one day - you'll take it far, I'm sure!
- Celeste Report Review
Very interesting question: who was Scorpius and who was Dominique in my mind? Well, I must confess I just glanced quickly at the "areas of concern" and then clicked on the link, assuming I'd figure out the characters as I went along. Nope. These two characters could be anybody, really. In fact, they don't even have to be opposite-sex people. However, if I had to pick, the narrator felt more female until the very end. Therefore, looking back at it, I would say I would have thought of Scorpius as "you" save for the line about "you falling into my arms," because we tend to think of things happening the other way around when we read that, you know?
Did that make any sense at all?
I think I am in love with anything you write, because reading it is so enjoyable. Your writing really is so beautiful. I could read it just for the sake of reading it. Your style mixes great with fluff, I think, in part because your writing has such a dreamy, floating quality about it.
You also asked about plotline. Well, to be honest, I don't see much of a plot. There's a lot of description and sensation, but there isn't much happening. It's a couple acting silly and then enjoying some couple-time, as far as I can tell. I don't really think of that as plot . . . it's more like peeking in through the window and watching someone for an hour. (That sounds creepier than I meant it to.)
About the concept: I've never read anything like this before, but I did just read a story that focused on color. Obviously, the use of color can be symbolic, and here you have used it to show a blending and sharing between two people. I'm not sure how literally this was meant to be taken, and I don't see a particular point in writing this story (not that every story has to have a point, of course). So I'm not completely clear on what the concept was supposed to be. Nevertheless, it was an enjoyable read. :-)Author's Response: Sorry for the late response again!
True, true. They really could have been anybody. But I needed some sort of excuse to show that this was HP fanfic and not OF. And I wanted to be greedy and write another Dominique/Scorpius, which is why it ended up being this pairing.
You are lovely. :) And too nice to me, though I am utterly undeserving of your kindness. What a relief! I can kind of write fluff! I'll admit that I once despised it, but I'm trying to expand and try new things.
Oops. I didn't realize I asked about plotline for this one! (Because, as you pointed out, it doesn't really have one.) I was pondering submitting another story instead which did have a plot, but instead chose this one. So, I apologize for that!
The concept...was more or less a reflection of two people changing to suit each other, I suppose. As you said, it really is abstract. To me, Scorpius was the one who was painted and Dominique was the painter. Scorpius allowed Dominique to paint him in colors that he was not, but that she preferred and in turn, Dominique ended up painting herself. When they fell together and made the color "blue", that was symbolically showing them coming together to make something that suited both of them -- blue symbolising the ideal color which suited Scorpius and the color of Dominique's eyes (ocean colored). So, I suppose, it was a story of a couple changing for each other, but that change was shown in a favourable light.
Thanks so much for reviewing, Alopex! As always, your reviews are insightful and thought-provoking and entirely delightful to receive.
- Celeste Report Review
I've been reading your pieces and I have to say that they're lovely! This one is no exception.
As far as who's who in this piece, well, I'm not entirely certain. In my mind she's the painter. Perhaps, it's simply because I see her as being a woman of strong personality in my mind.
I love how your words seem to flow like poetry from the tip of your computer keys, I would say quill, but that doesn't seem quite apt for a tale that's being read on a computer.
I loved the imagery, the characterization, and the sheer brilliance of your prose! You have great talent.
I would complain about length normally, but I think this is pretty good for something that was whipped up in thirty minutes and it's very enchanting.
“Let me paint you,” you ask without asking.
“If you want to.” I say without saying. I think those might be my favorite lines in the entire piece.Author's Response: Hey, thanks for reviewing and sorry for the late response!
I've actually had more people say that the painter's the girl rather than the boy, so I think a lot of people saw it your way!
Thank you so much! Flow is something I try to work on; imagery I've always considered a weakness.
Those lines that you mentioned came to me very randomly (as did this whole piece). I was (and am still) quite unsure of this piece as a whole, but I'm so glad you liked it! :D
Thanks again for reviewing!
- Celeste Report Review
In my mind, it was in fact Ted Tonks and Andromeda. The kind of whimsical love I think sums them up: the way they could be content with just each other.
Added to favourites: as it's said in the adverts, "j'adore". Except they make it so much more seductive.
xEAuthor's Response: It's interesting that it made you think of Ted/Andromeda. I thought of several ships (James/Lily mostly) that could fit, but I never considered that one. It's entirely possible, though!
Thank you so much for reviewing and for your kind words! :D I'm pleased you liked it!
- Celeste Report Review
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