so I read rite of passage and I was a bit like 'eee eee, I like this person.' Then I scrolled down your author's page and saw this and was like 'EEE EEE IT ALL GETS BETTER'.
so terribly sorry for that little outburst. I'm a bit of a Drastoria fan, so anything with 'astoria' in the summary and 'draco' in the character list makes me flail. AND OH THAT SONG TOO. eee eee eee & eeetc ♥
IT'S POSTWAR TOO OMG. sorry for the flailing, but literally this is the best type of story ever AND I HAVEN'T EVEN GOT PAST THE FIRST SET OF ASTERISKS YET.
calm. calm self. stop the capslock. right. now onto a proper review.
I like Astoria (I'm assuming this is Astoria, unless, wham, bam, Daphne's narrating it instead) as a narrator already. She has a powerful voice. She's young and tough and bitter and cynical and this is only the first section. Good setting up of a character there ♥
just noticed a little mistake - ' I donít want him being brought up again.' - i love to think that Astoria speaks in html, but I think this may be a typo of sorts. It appears as italics in the review, but the html tags are left in the actual chapter. Also, I think, as well, that these asterisks are out of place - '"Donít be difficult, Miss Greengrass, we need to run tests on it to ensure there is no dark magicó" / *** / "Dark magic?" I fly off the handle,'...' - unless this is a clever structuring ploy.
moving swiftly onwards. I love this Astoria. I think I love the whole Drastoria pairing so much because, as well as being rather intrigued by the character of Draco, I'm doubly intrigued as to what sort of woman in the world would want to marry a man like him. And reading this Astoria, it's, like, wham, this is why. I can totally see this Astoria being perfect for him (I think I'm counting eggs before they're hatched or however that turn of phrase goes, seeing as this is only chapter one). So well done.
I may just start stalking this story. Sorry for the long, rambling and slightly incoherent review, but...ah, I really have no excuse. I'm always like this. Thank you for writing this ♥ Report Review
Hi Emma :) Here I am with your review, yay!
I like this :D Everyone's all about Draco/Hermione or Draco/Ginny. No one ever thinks to focus on the pairing that JKR said actually occurs! The only time I remember reading an Astoria/Draco is when it's a minor shipping.
Anyway in addition to never reading an Astoria/Draco story, I don't think I've ever seen her characterized. I love what you've done with her personality! It seems very stuck up and proud, while still being smart and avoiding the REALLY crazy pureblood mindset. I also find cynical and sarcastic people extremely entertaining :D
I really love this little intro to the story as a whole. It set up the story really well, with the scene and what the Ministry is doing and how everyone's being affected. I also like how you threw in little things to keep me enticed, like Astoria's initial reaction to Draco and how they're going to end up together!
You did a great job! :D
KatrinaAuthor's Response: Thank you so much, Katrina. :) Is Drastoria really that uncommon? o.O Wow. Well, I don't really do much of the ordinary, I suppose. XD
I'm so glad you like her personality - I love her, because she's so much fun to write. She hates everyone and everything. I don't think she would have been really crazily pureblood because her family wasn't involved in DE stuff, and I assume they'd at least have one rellie in there if they were.
Again, thank you so much for the review and I'm glad you liked it! Draco and Astoria might not end up together in this story, but it is amusing to think they will eventually get married and have little blonde-haired babies.
- emma xx Report Review
Brilliant start! :D I love your writing and portrayal of Astoria, and also the description of the post-war wizarding world and the effect it's had on the lives of purebloods.
Just one random thing I noticed: "Don't be difficult, Miss Greengrass, we need to run tests on it to ensure there is no dark magic-" - you put a *** after this to separate it only it didn't really seem to need separating from the next part... :/
But I have no actual criticism about the piece itself, so yay! x) All very interesting, very enjoyable, and it definitely has lots of potential! Looking forward to more :)Author's Response: EEEP. I got an unrequested review! From an amazing writer! eeep! Thank you, my dear, very much. I'm so glad you enjoyed it, and I'm terribly sorry about the misplaced separator - accident, I was a bit out of it when I submitted that chapter. XD
Hooray, thank you so much, once again. Now if I can just write the second chapter that would be lovely.
xx emma. Report Review
Terms of Service
categories & genres
short story collection