3 Reviews Found

Review #1, by living a oneshot The Suffering Never Stops

24th March 2010:
First off, I have to say I really enjoy post-war stories. Mainly ones that revolve grief (odd, I know). I really like this one, but it just seems a little short. I know it's a one-shot (I'm a fan of one-shots too) and you can only do so much with so many words, but for me it just left Ginny a little flat. Hm, I wish I could explain it better - I'm sorry! You're writing is amazing though, everything flows very well and that adds tons to the story. Anyways, great one-shot.

katelynn (:

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Review #2, by LunaTheDeathEater The Suffering Never Stops

2nd March 2010:
Good plot! :) I like the story! Maybe it's a little short... Ginny gets well so suddenly. Maybe you could make it a little more problematic for Hermione to get to her. But apart from that, it's great ;)

Thought I'd check out your story since you reviewed mine :) Really like it. You should write more stories :)

Author's Response: Well, she isn't entirely well yet. A simple smile doesn't mean she isn't out of the grief... And yes, I am writing another story. Thanks!

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Review #3, by iamsnape The Suffering Never Stops

19th January 2010:
Hello :) Leaving a bit of a critique-like review, so I hope it helps some how.

This wasn't really how I expected it to be (content I mean). I wasn't sure what to expect when I read the summary, but I was glad it wasn't some long talk between Hermione and Ginny, like other one-shots similar to this I have read.

There are a few grammar mistakes, and a few wrong terms/things from the books here and there (for example, when you said Little Hamington cemetery, did you mean Little Hangleton? The same one from Goblet of Fire? Just trying to help).

Also a couple of times I thought Ginny and Hermione sounded out of character - Hermione more so in the italicized paragraphs, and Ginny when she was shouting at Hermione. I also thought it was quite odd when Hermione was sort of stuttering when speaking to Ginny as she's normally quite a strong character and it didn't seem like something she'd do. Plus you'd think it would be Ginny speaking like that, as her brother had died, and Hermione would be putting on a brave face to try and ease the situation.

I did, however, like your description of the Weasley house. Especially when you said '...and most of all - no laughing.'. It really showed the effect of Fred's death, as the Weasley household is - as you pointed out - normally a very happy place. Following it up with 'the explosion returns to my mind' worked well, because you showed how Fred's death had effected the characters.

Overall I liked your description in this and the more subtle ways of showing how Fred's death effected everyone, as I think that often works better than saying it out right.

Hope I wasn't too harsh, I like leaving reviews like this as I feel I'm helping, so hopefully I did haha. :)

Author's Response: Thanks. I'll see if I can fix my errors soon, but I've got another chapter in validation so that won't be for now.

I know. I still don't think I wrote them very well, but all I have to rely on is that when someone dies, you really don't act as normal. That's why I thought about Ginny shouting at Hermione to cover her own upset.

Description's one of my best areas. Usually my writing's kind of sharp and really hits people before they know it, but when it comes to things like death I'm a bit more quiet and subtle.

So overall, thanks for the review!

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