This was so sad and beautiful! You captured the sisters' personalities so well. I can definitely imagine each of them acting the way they did in this story.
This made me think a lot about when the girls were little. You captured the relationship between Bella and Narcissa particularly well and the events that happened in this seem so normal. Even the darkest of wizarding families deal with every day things, such as a sister leaving for Hogwarts and another sad that she's leaving. It was so poignant. Lovely job with this! :)Author's Response: Thank you!
I was worried that the storyline was too simple or the characters too flat, so I'm very glad to hear that you didn't think they were. :) I'm pleased that the everyday aspect of it didn't come off as trite or, worse, boring.
Again, thanks for your feedback! Your review is very much appreciated. Report Review
Hello there! I joined in the UFG challenge too, and the banner you wrote this story after was so breathtaking I wanted to check out the story that went along with it. I must say, you captured Narcissa's naive innocence very well, and your description was also wonderful. It was a very realistic way of showing the Black family's life, before the daughters went in such completely opposite ways. Narcissa's imagination was wonderful. It was an enjoyable, nice little piece. Well done.Author's Response: Wow, thank you so much. I had never written really anything about the Black sisters, so I thought Narcissa would be a good challenge for me. I'm so glad you thought that her character turned out OK. Thank you so much for taking the time to review this. I really appreciate it. Report Review
That was spellbinding. You caught me with the first line, and I stayed hooked until I saw the Add to Favourites button.
Some people say a one-shot isn't enough to develop a story -- I'd suggest this would prove them wrong.
I adore your descriptions. 'Shattered' is a better word for the raindrops that I've seen in ages -- I can picture your entire story almost perfectly.
I hope the beauty of this continues for ages.
xEAuthor's Response: Thank you so, so much. I'm kind of in a one-shot rut right now, and haven't really been able to right anything else for quite some time. Your comment about developing stories in one-shots just... made my week. It really did. Thank you so much for all of your kind feedback in your review. I appreciate it more than I can express. Report Review
Rin this was just so sweet but heartbreaking at the same time. I adore how you brought that across.
You are the Queen of the One-Shot but also, for me, the Queen of Description. Your style is to die for. It's so light and yet has a haunting air buried beneath it - simply amazing. The description of Narcissa's 'dream house' here was so beautiful.
I completely adore it - the Black sisters are written quite rarely and this does them a lot of justice.
xxAuthor's Response: Your reviews never fail to get a smile out of me. ;) I'm so, SO touched at your words and comments, I'm... almost at a loss for words. I don't think I can thank you enough for such a kind, lovely review. You've definitely made my week (again!). Report Review
Terms of Service
categories & genres
short story collection