Ahh poor Alba and her defect boyfriends, love Harmony's charactor btw! Report Review
The beginning needs a bit of work, theres a few misspellings and what not. Once you hit maumoon though theres lots of nifty jokes scattered about. And as for who Harmony (ceres) hit...hmm toughy all the guys you named are still alive in the books, unless you went off the charts :) Report Review
looking forward to the next chapter!Author's Response: One will be up as soon as I finish a few essays :) Report Review
very interesting, little rabbit... looking forward to the next chapter :)Author's Response: thanks, I'm glad people are enjoying it. I'm a slow typer but the next chapter will be up soon :L Report Review
OoooOoooOoo Cliff hanger!
I liked this but it's a little bit confusing about whats going on in this bit...
**"Hey, I've got to drive my little sister to school," she rolled her eyes and hoisted a large slingbag over her shoulder. She walked out the door. The bell tinkled.**
I just don't know where it came from and it seems to have change tense, from 1st to 3rd person, sorry if it's just me being a complete idiot but it just cut up the flow of the chapter for me.
Anyway I am intrigued so update soon.Author's Response: I'll rephrase it right away, thanks for you suggestion and I'll update soon :) Report Review
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short story collection