I liked the idea of just writing about what she feels and basically just explaining everything in her point of view - It's a simple idea but i think that you've put it across rather well.
Although, i would have spaced out the writing more so that it wasn't in such big chunks.. But that's just me, it might not be how you like it. It was only an idea:)
Other than that, i think that it's good. Therefore, i'm going to go on a wander over to your page to find your other story that you mentioned.
Dee, xAuthor's Response: Thanks for this review...no one else has reviewed this one! I really appreciate the advice, I have never written a one shot before and so am much more experienced writing in chapter form! I know what you mean and I think if I were to do it again I would definitely improve it! I had this idea in my head for ages and wrote the last couple of sentences last, so I knew where I was headed. I think this really helped me. I know it isn't great but I just wanted to see what people thought! Thanks for the FAB review! x Report Review
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