Gah! George coping with Fred's death pieces always get me emotional. Oh here come the tears ...
You say it right in your authors note, really George wouldn't stop living when Fred died, though I like to think about how dramatic it would be if he did. Oh wait, did I just see a plot bunny toddle past? I think so! Anyway, you show really well how, while George would be devestated, he would still keep going, because that is what Fred would have wanted.
The protrait was a nice touch that I haven't seen done before and I love how you made him not seriosuly rely on it, for it isn't Fred in person. It was very mature of you as a writer to do that, for it is actually really like what would happen. Nice job.
It made me giggle a little inside at him counting off his family. I know it really wasn't the place for it, but they do have such a big family that you would have to count nearly, just to see.
Style wise, you seem to be constant all the way through. Is this one of your earlier pieces? Jst from what I can see, your writing has matured more than this later on, while this is still written remarkably well. There are also no obvious grammar mix up's which is marvellous! That never happens with me, I can assure you.
Overall, a great fic. Seriosuly, I was welly (my words for welling up of tears in your eyes.) :P Hugs,
- HPBAuthor's Response: Oh wow, thank you so much for this unexpected review! You're right, this is one of my older fics, though certainly not my oldest. I wrote this one about two years ago and it really doesn't feel like it so when you asked I actually had to go back and check!
It was actually really difficult for me to write this piece because it was hard to find a balance between George's grief, because he would certainly never stop missing his brother, and him living his own life.
I liked the portrait as well. I think it would be just enough for George to know that even though Fred wasn't alive, he wasn't gone. George still had all of his memories of him and nothing could take that away.
Thank you, really. This was such a lovely review and a great way to start my day!
Dem Report Review
I love me some Fred & George...never fails to make the day a bit better. And that's double true when it's written so well.
This is an important scene for any of us F/G fans. The loss of half that duo was hard to read (and I imagine pretty hard to write too). I have often considered the underplayed impact on George after such a soul-splitting tragedy. I think that your scene does it right and really captures the essence of their dynamic and the aftermath of Fred's departure.
Oh and the first word, Gotcha!, I don't know if you came up with it yourself, but it's brilliant. I think it sums them up just right.Author's Response: Fred and George really can cure a bad day, can't they? Though this story is a bit more depressing.
It was so difficult to write and I'm glad that you think I've captured it well. I was just hoping to do it justice!
And yes, I did come up with the "Gotcha" bit, myself. I thought it fit just right with them, no?
Thank you for this wonderful review!
Dem Report Review
That was a very realistic showing of grief, I think. I loved the handful of Extendable Ears and the description of the change in the signs above the door to the building.
I especially loved the part with the portrait of Fred and that exchange. I think they were both very much in character which is hard to do with them.
Great job, 9/10Author's Response: Thank you for all the compliments. ^^
I think it's incredibly difficult to get them both in character because people tend to give them both the exact same personality when, in reality, they are a little bit different. So I'm glad that I was able to portray that. ^^
I loved the portrait idea! I remember thinking about it one day and being like, "Why didn't Harry just get a portrait done of Sirius so he could talk to him?" I mean, he's not the real thing, obviously, but as far as I can tell, the portraits retain all the memories of their former life. So...
Anyway, thank you again!
-Dem- Report Review
ah, you're making me cry!! ;_; but also smile at the same time. a beautiful story :')Author's Response: Aww, thank you! That was my intent. A happy/sad story. Bittersweet, I suppose, is a better word.
Thanks for the review!
-Dem- Report Review
That was beautiful! Thank you so much! I had tears in my eyes by the end... along with a smile :) Very well written! :)
10/10 for sure!Author's Response: Aww, thank you so much. I love that one-shot. The twins are my favorite. I was so sad when he died. :(
But thank you, again. :D Report Review
I quite liked it. OK I loved it. DON'T JUDGE ME!Author's Response: Hahaha, no judging! Except to say thanks. :DDD Report Review
I love Fred and George and this fic made me so happy!!!Author's Response: Thank you so much for the review!
This fic actually highly depressed me, except the end, haha. Report Review
Just so you know, this is fantastic. It is very well-written and clearly heartfelt. I started crying while reading this...Author's Response: Aww, thanks! I really appreciate this review! Report Review
Aw! I was so sad when Fred died. I couldn't care less when Harry 'died' (I mean, he's the hero, what was there to worry about?), everyone else made me sort of sniffle, but I nearly burst into tears, quite honestly, when I read the part about Fred. And he died laughing... I thought that was awesome. And this was so perfect; I think George really would react this way.Author's Response: Fred's death was so unexpected and quick that I didn't even know how to react. The way it was written was beautiful though, and it made me so friggen sad.
Thanks for the review! I'm glad you liked it. ^^ Report Review
I thought this was a really sadly sweet depiction of George's life following Fred's death. You managed to perfectly balance George's inherent humor with his blatant depression, and, for that, I have to applaud you. Perhaps the thing I found most powerful about your piece was the recurring theme of humor, whether it was intentional or not. George yelling, "It's not funny!" was so twistedly ironic, yet, at the same time, truly heart-wrenching.
George's reaction to Fred's death is something that is excluded from the book, and I enjoyed your portrayal of it here. Most fanfiction authors choose to skim over the touchy subject, probably because it is so difficult to get right. It seems impossible to write one of the most humorous character's in the book as depressed, almost like it's out of character. However, in this, I think you did a pretty excellent job of it. At first, I was skeptical of George's dramatics, but, at the same time, I could see it unfolding in my mind. George is a human being like anyone else; he cries, and he mourns. Once I'd come to terms with that fact, it was easy to trust and support your characterization.
One thing that I also truly adored was one of your last sentences: "He hadn't lost his brother at all, and he knew that one day, in that Great Room of Requirement in the sky, they'd be together again." Hogwarts was basically one of Fred and George's favorite place in their lives, I'm going to assume; they practically lived for exploring secret passages and creeping around the castle. It seemed so fitting that you would compare the Room of Requirement to heaven, and I honestly am supremely jealous of you for thinking up this clever metaphor. Besides the fact that it makes perfect sense, it fits this story amazingly well.
Now that I've appropriately inflated your head, I do have a few small critiques to make about this piece. Firstly, when I opened your one-shot, I saw the first paragraph and very nearly groaned. "Oh no," I thought to myself, "one of those authors that writes extremely long paragraphs. I really don't have the attention span for that right now." However, after scanning the rest of the story, it became apparent that only your first paragraph was like that. Maybe this is just me, but I can't stand reading long paragraphs. For some reason, when it's all clumped together, it looks so unappealing and dreary. I highly recommend splitting in up into two, because once you get past the first impression of the paragraph, it's actually a rather good hook into the story.
And, well, I know I had a few critiques but they must've not been so important/even existed because I can't think of them. I've probably rambled on and taken up enough of your time already (I always write the longest reviews, but for some reason I just can't help it) so I'll wrap this up now. Excellent characterization of Fred and George (I'm dreadful at writing them, so I'm particularly envious of your skills) and I really enjoyed your title, especially when you tied it in with the story with that last line.
Thank you for writing an excellent one-shot and taking the time to read my review! :)
Cherry BearAuthor's Response: Wow. Thank you so much for this review! Haha, it's truly made my day!
It was incredibly difficult for me to write this fanfic because it was so hard to imagine George as anything but happy. I actually gave up on it for a while, not being able to get past the introduction.
But once I got into it, it was really easy to write. I never thought of George as one to let his brother's death stop his own life. And I hate reading stories that depict him like that (one of the reasons I really wanted to write this story).
And yes, I agree with the overwhelming nature of giant paragraphs. I think I'll go look back on that first one and see if I can split it up. I have a really hard time going from one thing to the next, deciding when to split paragraphs, a lot of the syntax stuff. So I tend to get pretty long paragraphs, especially at the beginning of stories.
As for the Room of Requirement in the sky, that little bit of inspiration came from the end of the seventh book. Harry described the place he was in, after he died, like a giant Room of Requirement. Sooo, I can only take half-credit for that bit of genius. :D
Of course, I can only take half-credit for anything I write on here, because J.K. Rowling made it first. And I love her for that. ^^
Thank you so much for this review. It definitely inflated my head, hehe. And thank you for the critique! Those are what I really need anyway. I won't get any better without 'em.
I'm glad you enjoyed it!
-Dem- Report Review
"[Q]uite the Saint if I do say so myself!" would have to be my favorite line by far.
Overall, very solid story that kept my interest all the way through and while it didn't stir any great emotions in me (I was never that upset over Fred's death in the story, though it was sad), the humor fit well and you did a nice job making canon-story references in the jokes. Fred and George were very much in character and that's what made this story a fun read.Author's Response: Why thank you.
:D Report Review
:) What a lovely story! Although it was so sad *sobs*
I'm a twin myself, and I thought your description of Fred and George being always together and being defined as apart of eachother was most interesting. Hm. I think you captured their dynamic incredibly well in such a short space: congrats!
I liked the dialogue between Fred and George: it was perfect. I think George is strong enough to go on and keep living too: I don't think he would give up on life.
Awesome story! Wonderful description. Thanks for posting.
Cheers- HallowsAuthor's Response: Thank you so much!
This story was really difficult for me to write for a while because all I could think about what Fred being dead. And it was incredibly depressing.
I know not all twins (probably not most) are as close as Fred and George were but they really had a unique relationship.
-Dem- Report Review
This was great :)
Fred and George were always favorites, and its nice to see them portrayed liked this. I love the idea of a portrait of Fred, and I definitely agree that George wouldn't just stop living. I really liked the description at the beginning of this and it was really well written through out. Great job!
Oh! And the title and summary were both really fitting xDAuthor's Response: Thanks for the review!
I'm glad you liked it. I was just hit with a bit of inspiration after re-reading the 7th book. George was just as much a part of the pair as Fred (even if he was the quieter one).
And thanks! I thought the title/summary fit well too. Obviously. Haha >.> Report Review
Oh i love this. The twins have always been two of my favorite characters and can't imagine them separated :(
This was nice though! Great writing, i like your style, it was deep; which was perfect for this obviously death is a very deep topic and even though Fred and George are always joking you know that they can be very deep.
Okay I'm done rambling. Loved this!
roonilwazlib13Author's Response: Thank you so much for the review!
I love the twins, and I was so upset when Fred died. Whenever I read stories with George after the death, he always seems put out like he has no life left, but I never thought of him to be like that. Sure, he's sad that Fred is gone, but he's still one of the twins.
Hehe, thanks again. :D Report Review
Wonderful story. I just love it.. Very well written!! 10/10
Please R&R mine..Author's Response: Thanks for the review! I'll be sure to take a look. Report Review
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