Hey! I really enjoy your story and hope that you intend on completing it. Don't give up! :)Author's Response: Thank you so much. I'm currently extremely busy and unlikely to make this a priority writing-wise but I'm so happy to hear that you like it. Thank you for reading and reviewing! Report Review
What a great start to the story I've heard so much about! This opens up about a million questions in my brain, all of which I'm sure will be answered later but for now provides an excellent incentive to continue reading. I have no idea who the two characters are, but at this point I don't think I want to know because not knowing makes the whole thing so much more mysterious.
There's a wonderful balance between tension and pace, so that it's not all on-the-edge-of-your-seat but it also doesn't lose its intensity. The relationship between the two seems like a kind of destructive one, whoever they are, which I can't wait to find out about later.
You end the chapter/prologue excellently too, providing a further hook for the reader. I love it! I can't wait to read more.
Well done! Report Review
This is still oh so amazing :)Author's Response: Aw, thank you! Report Review
That was a cute chapter :) Even though there's still a lot of the old Seb in him, being with Molly has changed his views a little, and that's quite sweet to see, haha. I enjoyed all the fluff! It had a really relaxed, "before the storm" feel to it so I'm super excited to see what everyone's reaction will be!
I hope they're not too hard on poor Molly (or maybe I do so it's interesting to read about. I feel mean :P )
Hope you update soon =)
~Maddie xAuthor's Response: That's what I really wanted to get across in this chapter! He's definitely changing and so is she, but I'm so glad you picked up on the atmosphere. It's definitely very much like that.
Haha, mean but necessary? You'll have to wait and see.
I'll try and update a bit quicker next time.
Thanks for the review Report Review
Aw Molly! She's stuck between a rock and a hard place, huh? I completely understand her dilemma, but because we've read the prologue and know what's to come, and as much as a part of me loves their relationship and how it's affected Seb, I kind of am leaning towards wanting her to end it with him. *le gasp* I know, I know, I can't believe I said it either, but I just think she could find someone better for her, someone she can smile more around and have a relationship that's more...healthy for lack of better word, haha.
I kinda feel like jumping into the story for a few moments and shaking her whilst giving her the whole "girl, you need to move on and fill the Seb-shaped gap with some good ol' Ben&Jerry's and OPEN THOSE NAIVE LITTLE EYES! IT'S WHAT'S BEST FOR YOU! TRUST ME, EVEN THOUGH I SOUND SLIGHTLY PHSYCOTIC AND/OR DEMENTED BECAUSE OF CAPS-LOCK (my addiction)" speech. Yeah, I should shorten that title...
It's sad that she can't really /enjoy/ her relationship with Seb because of all that guilt :( But things will look up soon...right? Maybe? (she asked, stupidly hopeful and defiantly ignoring the prologue.) :P
Maddie xAuthor's Response: She completely is and it's taking its toll on her a bit. I'm really glad that you mention the prologue! I wonder whether people forget about that by the time they get to this point but it is important to remember what happened at the very start of the story and to bear that in mind then.
Also very happy to see that you want her to end it with him! That means I'm doing my job properly. I like your choice of 'better for her than him' too. That really got me thinking. The next few chapters will explore a different side to the two of them, a much lighter side and hopefully you'll see something new in them.
Hahaha, YES! I want to do that too, really, but the story would be a bit rubbish if it was just 'They started dating against their family's wishes but then they decided it wouldn't work. The End', wouldn't it? The drama and angst is very mcuh needed.
Things will look up. I promise.
Though for how long is another question :P
Thank you for such a gorgeous review! I'm so glad you like this story. Report Review
Another fab chapter, though to be honest, I do kinda feel glum after reading this. I genuinely think its Seb, and his almost hard to handle negativity. I just sat here and thought for ages, just wondering about him. His family seem nice enough. I mean, they're not without flaws, but his father does seem nice. Why is he being so rebellious?
To have that awful gnawing feeling about heading back to school is one I'm sure we all have felt, and yet, I'm kind of with Molly, too. I think I'm in the middle. Everyone dreads it like Seb, and yet there is still a kind of hopefulness, a feeling that this year will be the one that'll be different! A balance between the two would be perfect...but maybe that's what they will be both provide? A happy medium? I'm asking so many questions haha! Truth be told, it's a funny concept to get around, having two alternating tones and atmospheres. It is very cleverly done. It feels like a pendulum, swinging back and forth.
I adored your use of language in this chapter, like I said, providing a huge contrast, but still, subtlety is an art, and one you have very clearly mastered from the past few chapters. Not once did you say 'I'm really fed up', but rather it was implied through every adverb and adjective and everything you wrote. The last line, the rule of three you use so cleverly to really emphasise how Seb is feeling, defines everything he is. He's so given up hope, and yet he's lazy too. You just sense it through the text. I feel like he's only got himself to blame, but there's still that 'lost puppy' side to him that instinctively draws us to him. We want to guide him and correct his ways, and, jeez, does he need this? Is this what Molly is going to fall into? As I'm rereading this, warning flags are popping up all over the place because just like the prologue brought with it a sense of worry and anticipation, this does too. I am nervous for Molly, but yet I am for Seb too. I don't want him, or her, to fall victim to his cynicism.
I am loving this so much right now. I most probably will get round to reading some more of these (I'm going to work steadily through my queue/homework the next few days) but if I don't, please do rerequest or mail me, and poke me into action. Genuinely, I want to read so much more of this, but tonight I think I'm out of time. I am so favourite'ing though! :D This is just...amazing. Just like 'One and Only' blew me away, this has too. You are so up there with the incredible, ledgendary HPFF writers, Rachel, you really really are.
Laura xAuthor's Response: He gives me that effect after writing him sometimes. He's very melodramatic and over the top; a bit of a drama queen and a stroppy teenage boy at the same time. Really complicated character, actually :P His relationship with his family is very much founded on jealousy and desire for attention without going and actively seeking it. He has a lot of siblings with quite large age gaps between them and he's a very selfish guy anyway, so it all adds up into this desire to shut them all out except for those who give him individual attention: his grandmother and his sister. I should probably get that to come across in later chapters - I'll edit it in :P
I wanted to show that they are two opposites. Seb is a year older and getting to that point that I had felt quite strongly at the time when this came story into being. I'd just started uni and was feeling that excitement that Molly felt but the frustration I'd felt starting Year 13 the year before was also very vivid for me. I'd outgrown school and found it very easy and boring by that point and that's what came across in Seb.
Ooh, you might have picked up on something there :P I do want them very much to balance each other out - neither could ever completely lose the essence of who they are but they can certainly be affected by the other. The two tones is something I really regret doing, oddly. Although when I started rewriting this, I wasn't confident in writing 3rd person, now I feel much happier doing that and I could probably cut the word count down by a third if I did that. However, then I'm not sure anyone would quite get into their heads in the same way they do now and that's so important, especially to justify Seb being the way he is.
It's all about the implication and making it obvious without actively stating it. That's something that literally just clicked for me one day (2 years ago about now, when I wrote the prologue and my first Molly/Teddy story) and it's never really left me.
I overuse the rule of three, actually. If someone were to sit down and analyse my writing they'd pull that out and my obsession with 'perhaps' and 'maybe'. I really need to work on that! It's definitely laziness that's driving him and lack of real love and passion for Hogwarts; he never needed it in the same way Harry always did. I think sometimes we expect everyone to love it just because he did but I'm not sure that's really the case.
Warning flags ♥ Oh they're my favourites. You should definitely listen to them and keep them in mind because there are definitely moments here that should actually get some alarm bells going. I actually love that you pointed that out!
Thank you so much, Laura! I'd never put this on a par with One and Only. OaO's my baby, this has now grown into a stroppy toddler. I do warn you that anything after chapter 5 might not make much sense for the minute because I made some changes in earlier chapters that now need to be removed from later ones.
I...you know, I don't deserve that but thank you so much. I'm so happy that you liked it, lovely.
xx Report Review
Okay, so the ending of this chapter is the craziest in the world, because she's excited about having a good year, but the prologue...she was so sad! You are a genius, because I am hanging from tenterhooks and I'm almost wary about reading the next chapters. The date of the prologue was 2020 and with this standing at 2019, I hate/love you a little bit more. You've managed to maintain this almost dark mood from the chapter before so well, by reminding us that things can't stay like this. It's almost too good to be true.
I really like Molly. It's not often that I do connect with characters as well as I do with her. There's something about her - something a little unsettled inside her. She's very likable, but I think too because we shared that intense prologue with her we as readers feel like we know her when she's experiencing such raw emotion. I feel almost protective over her. She has so much depth, like the beautiful description at the start, knowing she should hate London but looking forward to it all the time just to be disappointed. We all do it. Of course we do. But to have it written down like it is here makes her more three dimensional, more real. Everything about the way you build up the characters is simply stunning - probably your strongest point.
I wish I could write a remotely constructive paragraph, I really do, but to be honest, I can't. It's like trying to pick flaws with Mozart. There's no point, because there are none. Saying that, I read through each chapter as I would a story in a book, and then I base my review on that. I'd rather not take the English Lit approach - I try to get away from school as much as I can :P Maybe there are typo's I've just missed, maybe a few grammatical slip ups. But to be completely honest with you, I wasn't looking for them, because I knew there was a high chance there wouldn't be any. With your writing it's about slipping into the atmosphere and the beautiful story you create around me. And still...flawless. You need to publish something. Anything! I want more people to read the wonderful things you can let us build with your words and our minds.
A really amazing 'first' chapter. If you had had this standing alone, without the prologue, it would have been just as brilliant, but that sense of foreboding really finishes this off. It was just so vivid and wonderful. I mean, typing this review now with the tiny snippet of the end of this chapter above the typing box, I can spot 100 things I love about the finishing paragraph. A dark, lopsided beanstalk. My favourite, I think. I can picture everything, and I love that you've allowed me to. You're a wonderful writer, Rachel!
Again, I can't wait to read more! Laura xAuthor's Response: I think the opposition in her character between this chapter and the prologue is hugely important and I really wanted to get across exactly how much she changes over the course of the nine months, both in herself and in her attitude.
Hahaha, I'm really sorry but you're probably looking ~chapter 40 to get any actual answers. It's the double perspective thing. It's completely messed up the story length so I'm in January and on chapter 26 at the minute :P I didn't really intend that to happen. It's a lot of ramble but I'm very glad you picked up on the prologue overshadowing this chapter; I really wanted that to stay in the forefront of people's minds.
I've always had it in my head that Molly should be very, very human. I tried to pull her traits from her grandmother, mainly, but she's very much her own person. Protective is very good; I feel quite protective of her in terms of the way I write her relationship with all the characters. I do try not to mess her up too much. She does have some elements to her that have been snatched from me which probably helps her humanity a bit: the nervous playing with jewellery that you pointed out in the prologue, especially, is lifted straight from me :P I also hate London and I build it up every time I go then BAM, traffic and smell and noise and people and I hate it. Of course, she's way nicer than I am and a lot softer than me too. I probably have more Seb elements than Molly elements in me :P
You know, I always think that if someone can look past the typos and the grammar issues, I've done something right. I love reading something where I can overlook the slip-ups in the grammar and spelling because everything else makes up for it so if someone says that about my writing, I feel like something of a success! Atmosphere and setting and making the reader feel involved is top of my priority list when I write; I get sucked into writing it and I want others to feel the same way when they read it.
It did used to stand alone, actually, in a pretty different format to this one. I went on such an editing spree the other day! Oh God, did I really write that?? Maybe I need to do another edit. That's a horrid line!
Thank you so much, Laura! I honestly can't quite believe this could ever get such a lovely review.
xx Report Review
Hey! Sorry that I didn't get round to reading and reviewing last night. Somehow, whenever you make plans online, real life always seems to get in the way in one way or another.
This, however, was fantastic. A prologue, not even 1000 words, and yet you've set up the tone for this story so wonderfully. It's thick with tension and with hurt, and yet beautifully so. The setting is mesmerizing - you've painted it so well - and I feel as though nothing is lacking to this. I love your description. It's so subtle. It compliments your dialogue so well.
As a reader, you often assume things. You read the summary, or the blurb, and arrive at the first few paragraphs with an already supposed view, and you keep that in your head until things start to unravel, and you can perhaps be corrected, or your thoughts are affirmed. With this though...I'm envious at how well you shroud this in mystery. We know it is Molly. We assume it is also Seb. But everything else...it's almost a haze, a panic, just like she is packing her things away we too are trying to piece everything together. I love how you've done this, kept us completely in the dark. To me, this is exactly what a prologue should be. This deprives me almost, making me want to sink into the story all the more but still addressing what is to come.
Her flight, or rather, failed flight, is beautiful and yet so sad. When reading this I felt within me too like she needed to get away, and I don't even know what from. Just your amazing writing! The way she fumbles with her necklace, listens carefully too often. You've hinted at foreboding things, such as with 'You just have to promise that you won't tell them where I am.' - and I think the way you build this up so steadily, that 'Seb' (as I can't be certain it is him) is untrustworthy and a crooked character, is so exciting and so, so clever. I can't praise you enough!
I couldn't not review this, basically :) It was wonderful. It would have made my next chapter review a stupidly long length haha! I really can't wait to read more; you've left me itching to find out what Molly decides, where this story takes me, and why, because for some crazy reason I feel like I'm right, she's the victim. I hope this restores a little confidence in this - I'll try and make my next reviews a little more detailed and constructive - sometimes it's very hard not to just get overexcited and ramble when reviewing your writing!
Laura xxxAuthor's Response: Lauraaa - how do I even START?? Thank you so much for leaving such detailed and unbelievably lovely reviews. Real life has a tendency to do that - it always happens to me.
This prologue is probably one of my favourite pieces of writing of my own. It's probably just over 2 years old now and that's so difficult for me to wrap my head around. I never like anything I write for very long but this has really stuck with me as a real turning point in my writing.
I wanted this opening to do all those things you mentioned, really. The actual start of the story doesn't have much of that so it was really important to me to get across the eventual aim of the story. I wanted there to be an underlying passion and certainly a level of tension between them that we don't see when Seb and Molly first meet.
Mystery was important too. I didn't want to give so much away that it made reading the story pointless, but still wanted to grab the reader and make them feel some sort of pull towards the characters. Hopefully as the plot comes together, people will be able to see the parts that are important in the prologue and the lead-up to it.
She's feeling very up and down at that point, I think. It's a hugely emotional time for her and she is so scared - though what of, I'm never sure. It is Seb! Two years on and I STILL haven't made that clear; there's just no natural place for it to fit in :P
Thank you so much, lovely. You really didn't have to review this but it means the world that you did and were so kind about it. I love how you used the word 'victim' - I'm definitely going to keep that in mind!
Thank you, thank you, thank you!
xx Report Review
Prat Seb ♥
(I have a type)
The bringing together of Molly and Seb :D
I feel bad for poor little Stephen. And am QUITE curious about this mysterious past of Sebastian's.
This situation sets things up quite nicely for a bad side of Seb. He's not really a doting older brother is he? I haven't any experience with siblings like that, my older brothers are sickeningly protective and the like, so I can't comment much on it other than to express, once again, my pity for Stephen.
Molly is a gem. I'm curious to see how things develop between her and Seb with this throw into the mix.
ShilohAuthor's Response: We're now getting to the point that I desperately need to edit :P This chapter won't make as much sense as it should because of my deletions in other chapters but I share your type!
I think we get a semi-reveal in chapter 8 then it's chapter ~14 where the entire story comes out. I think, anyway.
Seb's certainly the anomaly in this family. I think that if we looked at Alexander, the brother between Seb and Stephen, we'd see a much softer relationship. Seb's problem is a lot of jealousy. The age gap between him and his siblings is broad enough that the shift in his parents' attention still bothers him yet small enough that his youth's on his side. It's somewhat based on a friend of mine and his family (though the problem child there is the middle one).
She is. At the minute, he totally doesn't deserve her - I'm not sure he ever will.
Thank you for all your lovely, my darling. They've been wonderful and I've loved seeing your thoughts!
xx Report Review
Cryptic Seb ♥
Makes me verrry curious.
(If I were a proper stalker like I ought to be, I wouldn't be curious. I'd have already read everything you have posted.)
I'm going to compare this chapter to the ginger peach tea I'm drinking. It's a house blend at the coffee shop I frequent. I adore it. It's smooth and has a delicate flavour. But like any black tea, it has that certain taste underneath everything that just makes it perfect.
This chapter has a beautiful, smooth flow to it and the emotions are communicated subtly - giving me, as the reader, a taste of what's going on in Molly's heart without overwhelming me. Or ruining the overall effect. Which ties it in with the rest of the story. Like ginger and peach, it was the perfect combination of Molly with Seb and Molly with Harrison. Coming together to piece together another part of a truly lovely story.
This is a delicious as my tea.
(I truly love this tea.)
ShilohAuthor's Response: Cryptic and curious: exactly what I wanted to get across so YAY :D
You make me want to sample this tea now. However, I'm not sure paying thousands of pounds for flights out to you for tea would be my best idea... (I was listening to your foodie review podcast as I wrote that and you started talking about tea at the exact moment. It was quite amazing).
I really value subtlety in writing. I don't like being overloaded when I read something and I don't want anyone to feel that way when they're reading something of mine either.
I'm now going to get tea and biscuits just because of you. Thank you, lovely
xx Report Review
Seb is adorable. I really admire the way you've written these initial feelings. Instead of writing a seventeen year old boy with feelings a thirty year old woman might have, you write it very realistically. I know I'm guilty of adding too much dramatic flair to teenage romance, and we all know it's the trend of contemporary young adult fiction. You, however, capture the somewhat innocent and awkwardness of it without making it seem silly or ridiculous.
The way Seb describes everything I really like. His penchant for exaggeration especially. How Molly "shines brighter" and that Harrison is the "oafish boyfriend". That in itself adds much to the tone of the chapter. And really give insight into how Seb himself is feeling.
ShilohAuthor's Response: He exaggerates sooo much. He's incapable of thinking like a normal human being. Everything gets blown way out of proportion in his mind.
I'm so glad you think he's realistic though. This is going to get its dramatic flair later on in bucketfuls but there'll still be the awkwardness (the innocence will definitely fade :P ).
Seb indeed ♥
Thank you, darliiing!
xx Report Review
I admit it. I'm the absolute worst reviewer ever. Honestly. I am SO sorry love.
I should add to my previous review : I ADORE Molly. I've said it before and I'll say it now - No one writes Molly like you do.
Her mannerisms and her thoughts. Everything just screams "I'm JKR in disguise." :P
In all seriousness: The way you characterise her absolutely astounds me with its perfection. I hold all all other Molly's to your standards. *bows down*
I have nothing constructive for you. I fangirl too much to be any help. (Like I said - worst reviewer ever.)
LOVE the first Molly/Seb encounter. And love that he knows her but she doesn't know him. She is a bit in her own universe, isn't she? I mean - to not even recognize a classmate. Silly girl.
Have I mentioned the length of your chapters? I like it. Not too much going on, but it doesn't feel bitty or chopped up either.
*fangirl some more*
ShilohAuthor's Response: Hahaha, no you're not! Marina's definitely worse ;)
I feel way too protective over her character. I tend to forget that she's not mine which is awful but writing her - in any form - comes so naturally. I would hope that my writing's mildly more grown-up than JKR's :P I have issues with being compared to her...
Haha, fangirls are MOST welcome, lovely. Seb's actually a year above Molly so she wouldn't have had a great deal to do with him before, especially given that he keeps himself to himself. I probably ought to clear that up in the chapter :P
They're relatively short but I don't think I could cope with writing anything over 2.5K. The angst and rambling and first person would send me manic.
Thank you so much, my lovely. I'm so happy that you like it!
xx Report Review
I'm ready now.
Have I ever mentioned my love for Sebastian? Molly tells me I have 'a type'. He fits the bill. Although, I'll wait for him to grow out of his penchant for self-pitying. Honestly - we all have horrid family members. (To be fair, all of his, save Jules, are a bit awful.)
I love how you've characterised him, regardless of his small bouts of whinging. He's on the track toward tragic bad boy (perhaps what he's aiming at?). And his relationships with his family members are the perfect balance of complicated and exasperation. It feels like a real, messed up family.
So overjoyed to be reading this ♥
ShilohAuthor's Response: SHILOH ♥
I can't remember you doing so but I'M GLAD YOU DO. I also have a type and he's pretty much it. He's definitely pretty much physically my perfect guy. The personality does leave a little to be desired.
I probably feel more sorry for Molly with her family than I do Seb and his. He definitely exaggerates a little; with the exception perhaps of his meek and pushy father, they really aren't so bad. It's just his biased perception of them. He's more of the odd one out than all the others are.
He is such a whiner; it probably detracts from his likeability a bit but I never intended him to be adored. I like that you said 'what he's aiming at' - you pretty much hit the nail on the head with that. He exercises more control over who and how he is than most people do; he can twist and turn and mould himself pretty convincingly.
They're a bit messed up; definitely not Malfoy and Black standards of messed up, mind you :P They're probably more of a caricature of the old English upper classes than anything: conforming to an impression that people have of them and trying not to show anything that's gone on behind closed doors.
Thank you, lovely! I'm glad you liked it. I've missed you awfully.
xx Report Review
I honestly can't explain how amazing this story is. The relationship between the two, as well as the characters is just...beyond amazing. Seb and Molly are just brilliant - especially Seb! His characterization is just...wow. Honestly, I can't tell you how much I love this story - just me leaving a review should be saying something! Anyhow, regardless of your writer's block, this chapter was just as amazing as the first nineteen! Gosh, I can't even put my thoughts on this to words so you'll just have to pretend to understand what I'm thinking, okay? :PAuthor's Response: Wow, wow, wow. I really have very little to say to this! I always find it strange to get compliments on this story. I'm not especially proud of it but it's reviews like these that I go to when I consider just giving up. These reviews and Seb: I do feel very strongly about him and I want to get to that point where people start to understand how he works and how his feelings work in more detail.
Thank you so much for such a lovely review! Report Review
It took me a couple of days to get through all the chapters so far and I must say, I really enjoyed the read! Even though the plot it's quite a subtle plot, it still managed to keep me interested because of your intriguing characterizations. Seb in particular, he's a mysterious one isn't he? Haha, but it keeps the readers hooked!
What I love is how even from this point in the story, I can already imagine Seb becoming the man in the prologue. It isn't completely OOC, i mean, in my mind anyway it suits his character. There's something a little off about him...
And Molly! Her growth as a person throughout these chapters has been so interesting to watch. And in a way, I suppose it's all come about because of Seb. I like how you managed to put two mind frames on their whole relationship. Like if we go by the reactions and behavior of her friends and family on it, and i suppose Seb's POV too,then I would agree that it is slightly unhealthy how she's (unintentionally) hurting everyone around her just for Seb who at this moment in time is still a little shady. She doesn't really realize how she's isolating herself from people who care about her, I hope she spends some much needed time with them all soon! Especially Max!
But then when we see the relationship from Molly's POV, I actually end up pushing all those worries to the side because in a way, I understand their whole relationship and how they sort of balance eachother out. She brings out the best in him and he pushed her to her limits and opens her naive little eyes, haha.
So yeah, I think you moved their relationship along in a great way they suited their characters immensely. :) And also, along with the prologue, i'd like to mention how much I loved the way you wrote her break-up with Harrison. All the emotions, all the gestures and the way in which they spoke to eachother, it was all really realistic. And when you've been together with someone for so long and have gotten so comfortable with them, I can't imagine you having an emotionless, painless split, even if you fell out of love. All in all, I really liked your take on that :)
Oh, and before I go, JAMES AND DOM! :D They're my favourite characters, James makes me giggle with his i'm-trying-to-be-manly-and-protective-of-my-female-relatives. Makes me laugh :)
You're a brilliant author and this story is really different and entertaining. Can't wait for the next chapter to see where you take this story next! Btw, I adore your user name! Penguins are the bomb ;)
~Maddie xAuthor's Response: Oh wow. This is...epic is probably the best word. I can't believe anyone could write a review this long about this story :P
Subtle plot is probably a very nice way of saying 'long, drawn-out and barely there'. It could do with a heavy rewrite, really, but that would be a lot of effort and I really don't think I have the energy! Seb is probably what makes this story for me, and is the reason I find it hard to think about abandoning it.
The person he is in the prologue is definitely lurking. It's been exhibited before in what he did to Fred, this dark and passionate side to him that he can't seem to control. He's not openly emotional and that builds and builds and is bound to eventually explode. I think the key point to him is that he loves Molly. He really, truly does but he doesn't know how to share her or deal with that and this is really what makes him react to things the way he does.
Yeah, her change is all through Seb. It's always amazed me how a new person's presence can change someone - it's happened to almost everyone and I wanted to explore that with Molly.
You've really hit the nail on the head with everything you say. This is why I like having two perspectives because to see it from Seb and from her friends, you can see what she's doing to herself and especially from Max and Anna's actions, you see the naivety of her. Then you read Molly's point of view on it all and suddenly, you realise she wants to give him a second chance. I think she thinks she can save him and likes who she is around him. She is still very naive and very blind to what Seb actually is but a part of that is how well Seb knows her and can manipulate her. I think he's the most crucial character.
I don't think there can be a painless split after that amount of time, no matter how old you are. They're still young, they probably don't even know what love is (definitely weren't in it) but it's still very difficult for both of them to try and cope with not having the other there.
Hahaha, they're my favourites too! I absolutely love writing James especially. He's probably more like my image of James from the DH epilogue than any other version of him I've written. I really enjoy writing him and I'm pretty sure he'll be back. Look out for Fred and Roxanne too - they're a force to be reckoned with.
Thank you so, so much. This is by far and away the worst story on my page so to hear such lovely, kind words from you is fantastic and I really appreciate it.
I hope you continue to enjoy!
xx Report Review
Ooohhh. Well, this explains a lot.
You've just told me to get out of here and now I'm a little terrified. But I wanted to leave you the 100th review :(
I love their complicated relationship, so there.Author's Response: Well I hadn't realised what you were doing! I'm sorryyy. I just didn't want you to read this monstrosity and judge me for it.
xx Report Review
oooh. TENSION. And excellent dialogue, I must say. Seb is so dark and Molly just wants to help (typical Hufflepuff) and he gives me the chills. In both good and bad ways.Author's Response: Tensiiion ♥
Dialogue, however -shivers- Don't lie :P
Chills are good. Always good. I like chills.
I like you too. Lots ♥ Report Review
oh my god!
i love this story its amazing!
although i remember reading it before and it was a little different? wasnt there a scene in London with Victoire in the first chapter?
oh oh oh, and um, is Fred blind permanently or was Seb's spell temporary?Author's Response: Thank you so much!
It was different - very different. The writing in this is much better (and hopefully more concise) than in the original but it's still nowhere near good enough. I'm happy you noticed the change though.
Permanently in one eye. I'll clear that up ^_^
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its chapters like these that i just.i cant quite figure out wether i want to trust Seb or not! which is a testament to your writing! With each chapter i get hopeful that it will all make sense and then im left even more conflicted! love how real and human Molly is and how fallable! i cant wait to see where this is headed!Author's Response: Absolutely what I want people to say - thank you for saying it! This is all about Seb and the way he swings so violently between two extremes. I want you to see things from Molly's perspective, where she can see the good through the bad, and from his where things are a little darker but with these lighter moments in him that he doesn't understand.
Thank you so much for such a lovely review! I'll update when I can :) Report Review
HA IM THE FIRST REVIEWER!!
I love this story :)
I actually think it's pretty cute how Seb gets jealous like that. It's obviously not in his nature to be like that, so that just shows how much he cares about Molly. And their first kiss sounds perfect :)
Great chapter.Author's Response: WHOO! I wasn't expecting any so one so quickly is amazing to see. Thank you!
It's very cute but he'd not be overstruck at being called that, really :P
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Ahh that kiss, finally! I'm curious to see how it plays out. I totally understand having writer's block, but I'm looking forward to the next chapter already. :)Author's Response: Thank you so much! I'm really glad you liked it. I'll update as soon as I can. Thank you :) Report Review
aaw that last bit made me smile :) I love the way the characters interact and I can't wait to see more developments between them.Author's Response: Thank you so much. I'm glad you like it ^_^ Report Review
Perfect ending for the chapter, the simplicity of the last line was fantastic.
(sorry for the terrible review,I'm still SAT-lagged and unfunctioning.)Author's Response: Thank you so much! It's not a terrible review at all - nice and easy to reply to. I hope your exams went okay! Report Review
Love the story! Can't wait for more. Seb is such a great character.Author's Response: Thank you so much! Report Review
I just found this fanfiction...I have to say, this is absolutely brilliant. Your characterization, style, and the non-cliched plot makes me want to read more and more and more. It's just amazing. I'm excited for the next chapter!Author's Response: Thank you so much! I'm so glad you like it and that you took the time to review. I'll update as soon as I can ^_^ Report Review
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