AHAHAHAHA this chapter was hilarious! I love Pippa and Sirius's relationship; I particularly liked the scene where they were pretending to be Charlotte and Remus. And then in the Great Hall where she pretended to be him, that was funny, too.

“Reed don’t be grumpy…” I turned around in shock to see Sirius standing behind Charlotte at the door of our dorm. I went the deepest shade of red as Sirius just stared…and stared.
...that part doesn't work though because guys can't get up to the girl's dorm, and I know you had them address that, but still...
that scene was very funny though xD

Another great chapter :)

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Aw, this was cute. And really, really funny.
I loved everyone reactions when Pippa wailed Trauv with the bludger, particularly Sirius's. And Peter was such a copy-cat, which is perfect, because he is. Your portrayal of him is great. I loved his pathetic attempt at an excuse, too.
Good job again :)

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I like when you go into Charlotte's point of view. It's nice to see things from someone else's perspective. :)
Anyway, this was another great chapter. The way Charlotte puts things makes me laugh. Or, rather, you are funny? Here are just a few of my favorite points:

1.( like most self-respecting teenage girls I tend to ramble nonsensically when speaking to a boy of romantic interest) and then the ramble afterwards.

2. At that moment I think I would’ve rather consumed an entire gallon of Bubotuber pus than suffer the awful silence that was destined to follow. (that just struck me as funny)

3. I caught sight of James and Sirius giving him encouraging nods as they showed him how and where to hold me in a mocking and patronising manner-James grabbed Sirius around the waist and Sirius placed his hand effeminately on his partners shoulder as they rocked romantically in a tight embrace. (amazing image. I love it)

4. …room was filled with cheers and cat-calls (loudest coming unsurprisingly from Sirius, James and Pippa). I blushed feverishly, no doubt resembling a sunburnt Quaffle, (sunburnt Quaffle--very nice.)

5. Pippa placed both her hands on my shoulders and whirled me around to face her, saying seriously “Lottie, just go up to him, confess your undying love, strip off and have lots of sex and babies right there on the table.”

6. (it was also rumoured that he was constantly called home to deal with a particularly vicious rabbit)--a very interesting rumor.

So, once again, I love this story :) Keep it up

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Awww, this was cute!
Poor James--I wish Lily would just pay him some attention already. And Sirius is just so sweet. I love him and how he came to her defense. I still think that you are captured their personalities quite well :)
Charlotte and Remus are adorable together. I hope you keep them together. Remus deserves a girlfriend :)
I also like how you brought the name Clearwater into the story. Penelope's dad? Very nice :)

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Again, another great chapter. I really like your description, as I have mentioned, and your vocabulary. I get so bored when people use the same words over and over, and it is nice that you use different words, like 'gleaned'
In this chapter, I particularly liked the scene with Pippa and Sirius, but even more so I liked Pippa's conversation with Ellie about it afterwards. It gave...I don't know...a sort of insight into his personality, as well as hers.
Another great job :)

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Although this chapter seemed a bit rushed, I still quite liked it. I like the relationships you are building between the characters. Charlotte and Remus are already looking to be pretty cute, and Sirius and Pippa's relationship is also...intriguing? I am looking forward to reading more about that. I also think you are quite accurate in your depictions of James and Lily's relationship, and also just Peter. I particularly liked when you had him picking dirt from his fingernails; that was very amusing.

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Once again, I loved it. I love your description of the characters and the events, and the dialogue is great. You have created very interesting characters--Pippa in particular seems very funny--and have, I think, captured the personalities of the canon characters well. Very god :)

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I clicked on random story and this came up. I don't read a lot of Marauder-period stuff, but I am glad I gave this a chance because I absolutely loved it. I can barely explain why. It was just...well I like the characters and the little back stories you threw in there as they were talking. It was just a very good read :)

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I really like the relationship going on between Remus/Charlotte! Really cute! The POV switches are good, but personally I like Pippa's POV better. She's more outrageous and her relationship with Sirius seems to get more and more heated =D it's good tension, keep it up =)
Also, your writing style is really good! Not to dramatic and not to descriptive, just in between with a good balance. Good job!

Author's Response: thanks so much for reviewing and giving such great feedback! it means a lot!
i'm glad you like charlotte and remus, things are about to get a lot more heated and same goes for sirius and pippa.
it's also great to hear that you think the POV switches are good, and i like pippa's POV a bit better too, how do you think i can improve charlotte's???
so keep reading and reviewing

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sweet story. continue.

Author's Response: thanks so much!
keep reading! :)

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I love this so far, and I can't wait to read the rest. =)

Author's Response: thank you so much!
can't tell you how much that means to get get such a positive review!
keep reading and reviewing to let me know your thoughts :)
cheers!

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cute so far! still reading =]

Author's Response: great! i'm really glad you like it!
really apprecitate the review :)
it's to receive feedback and please keep reading!

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I really enjoy this story so far I can't wait for the next chapter :D

Author's Response: thanks for the review!
i've got exams at the mo but there should be a new chapter very soon :)
keep reading!

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i like charlotte's point of view and i think that you should have more of them. i really like your story.

Author's Response: wow! thanks sooo much!
more charlotte is yet to come so keep reading!
cheers :)

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