This doesn't make sense. He doesn't want to spend his last hours with his family? A family is the only thing Harry has ever wanted. He wouldn't want to spend his last hours in any way but with his family. I thought, when you said that, that perhaps he was going to be doing something that would point out who murdered him. But no, you had him write a note saying that no one should look for his murderer because he "didn't want anyone else to be hurt." Which is dumb because he was saying that a murderer should be allowed to go free and as an auror he understands that anyone who uses murder as revenge once will use it as such again. Now about this poison. Severus would take 50 points from your house and call you a dunderhead. You said that all poisons can only be countered within 2 hours of imbibing. 2 hours. ALL poisons. As there are hundreds if not thousands of poisons in the world I find that just a bit hard to believe. Harry has a family. He would not have gone gentle into that good night. He never has. That's why he's lived this long.
I don't want this to be just one long criticism. I liked your writing style quite a bit. It's blunt and straightforward and I appreciate that quite a bit and find it absolutely appropriate to the plot. I just think you might have thought out your story a bit more. Of course, this is just my opinion. Thanks for listening.Author's Response: I'm sorry that you didn't enjoy the story. It was my intrepretation, and it's too bad that you didn't like it. I wanted Harry to be deattached, and that's what I created here.
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