Reading Reviews for An Ordinary Day
5 Reviews Found

Review #1, by _DearMyLove_ An Ordinary Day

17th September 2009:
Oh no, not the tea! What an awful way to go...

I really liked this story, it was so interesting and readable. Your writing has a kind of simplicity that makes it a pleasure to read. Charlie was a brilliant narrator...I loved how matter-of-fact he was. It was quite nice that he didn't have an angst attack when he realised he had been poisoned as I think that would have been quite out of character for him.

The first two paragraphs were the weakest points of the story, in my opinion. The repetition that it was an ordinary day but he would be dead in twenty four hours time felt a little forced. It was like you were telling the reader how ordinary the day was instead of showing them.

I really liked how Charlie methodically went through all the possibilities when he realised he had been poisoned. It seemed very in-character for him to want to run over the past day and try to identify the poison. Plus it reinforced how terrible it was when he finally found out that it was the tea...the other options (being pricked by a needle, the dragon burn etc) all seemed much more...heroic? That's not the right word but I hope you know what I mean...:D

Overall I thought this was a really great oneshot. Thank you for writing it 9/10 :D

Author's Response: I'm glad you liked this story and the way that I write. I've always felt that Charlie was a simple, down-to-Earth kind of guy. Thanks for the critique about the first two paragraphs, I guess I was really trying to emphasise the point about it being an ordinary day.

I'm glad you thought Charlie was in-character. We see so little of him in the books, but that is how I imagine him to be. I think working with dragons he would expect to die in a much more adventurous and heroic way (I do know what you mean) rather than something so little and mundane.

Thanks so much for reading and reviewing :)

 Report Review

Review #2, by lilausty An Ordinary Day

14th September 2009:
I not sure if I should gasp with horror or giggle with surprise. Tea? Poor Charlie! definitely not the most heroic way to go out lol.

I loved your descritions and the way you kept me guessing regarding how he was poisoned until the last few paragraphs!

Great writing! 10/10

Author's Response: I'm glad I kept you guessing and that the tea came as a surprise at the end. Poor Charlie, indeed, definitely not a heroic death.

Thanks so much for reviewing!

 Report Review

Review #3, by Pookha An Ordinary Day

11th September 2009:
Wow! That's so sad, and so real. So many people die in so many stupid and useless ways. I feel for Sarah and the Weasleys.

You tell a story beautifully and with a grace that makes everything you write so easy to read.

The way that Charlie recounts his last day is so well done. His typical day that turned out to be not-so-typical really gives us insight into his personality.

Usually my reviews are fairly long and full of praise and CC for things I think need improvement. This one is rather shorter because I don't see anything that needs improvement.

A masterpiece.

Author's Response: Wow! Such high praise! Thank-you so much! (Sorry about the overuse of exclamation marks, but I'm honestly astounded you thought it was 'a masterpiece'!)

It is true that people die every day in the most silly and mundane ways. Poor Molly loses another son before his time, I feel kind of mean for doing that to her.

I'm glad you were able to glean insight into Charlie's character from this piece, as you mentioned in my blog he is really quite an interesting character to write.

Thank you so much for the lovely review! I can't wait to read your entry for the staff challenge :)

 Report Review

Review #4, by _Rose_ An Ordinary Day

10th September 2009:
Wow, this is a very good story! I really enjoyed it, well done! 10/10

Author's Response: Thanks so much! I'm glad you enjoyed it.

 Report Review

Review #5, by Fish and Bird An Ordinary Day

10th September 2009:
Lovely! You paint such a believable picture that I'm sure we could all feel ourselves standing in poor Charlie's shoes. He is utterly human and evinces no supernatural or superhuman traits which might distance us from him emotionally.

The meaningless death also drives home how normal he was and how fragile life can be without the need of dark wizards and power struggles to endanger it. A cracking short story!

Author's Response: In a world full of dragons and dark wizards, I thought it would interesting to write of a fairly ordinary death on an ordinary day. I guess I wanted to give the message that none of us can predict how or when we are going to die and that we should value every day we have here on Earth.

Thank you so much for reviewing!

 Report Review
If this is your story and you wish to respond to reviews, please login