ohmygosh!!! i LOVE it!! you have talent my friend! but where are the rest of the chapters? or is this story a working progress?
xoxoAuthor's Response: Thanks for the review. Yes, this is a work in progress, I'm working on the next chapter. :) Report Review
That kinda sucked for Cedric how Cho came in so happy and everything. But now he's joining the Order! Yay! And at least he'll have someone close to him involved.Author's Response: Thanks for the review. :) Report Review
Love this story already! I like how it's part AU, part canon. And Adam and Marty may end up being some of my favorites. Gotta have my comic relief, and what better way than a pair of fun-loving, girl-obsessed teenage boys.
10/10Author's Response: I remember, before I started this story, having such cravings to write a Cedric/Hermione, and realizing that the best, most interesting way to do it would be to have him live and be AU... but I don't want to drift away from Cedric's character. I hope that I'm doing him justice, that if he had family and friends like I've given him he might have made the same choices...
Marty and Adam are fun, and definitely a package. In my plans they're fairly different people, but they keep on blending into the comic relief characters you like. :) Report Review
i liked your descriptions of hermions eyes, beautiful.
and how you stated he age difference, especially since he is out of school.
maybe hermione can point out her relatioship with krum?
as he is the same age as cedric.
anyways, great chapter !
-GGAuthor's Response: Thanks for the review. Krum could come into the picture at some point, but since the entire thing is in Cedric's POV it's less likely. No doubt Hermione's thinking of Krum, but reminding Cedric of her previous lover wouldn't really help with the whole idea of them getting together. :P Report Review
i was totally blown away by how smooth this chapter flowed. you put in and explained what happened to how cedric is alive very well with the dream and putting them all in when harry had his hearing was very smart too!
i like cedric and his friends. they seem like a solid group of kids and relatable with living together, jobless, and lady-less.
i think the reader picks up on some kind of sympathy towards cedric. he seems like he got the bad end of the luck stick in some situations like ladies and NEWTS.
very interesting set up. this is my first ced/h so you have my advantage ahaha i can't see where this goes!
becca xxAuthor's Response: Thanks for the great review! I wrote about 4 chapters of this story, never posted them, and instead threw them away and used the general idea of them to write this version. That definitely contributed to the smoothness. I'm glad you sympathize/relate with Cedric; I really want him to be the kind of character you can do that with. Report Review
wow, cedric /just/ realised the age gap between him and hermione. for a smart guy, he sure is slow.
I'm really curious as to what he'll do about "emily". Will he say he dumped her, will he get another girl to pretend to be her, or will he actually find an emily to keep his thoughts off hermione?
this was a really cute chapter, and i kept giggling through it.
10/10Author's Response: I think Cedric was always aware Hermione was younger, it was just once he realized he had a crush on her he was forced to actually think about it.
As for Emily, we're not done with her yet. . . It's hard to keep up with Cedric's social life sometimes, but I'm going to fit her in there! Report Review
Cedric and Hermione make such a couple even though they aren't yet. I love this story and great and wonderful is not enough to describe the story. And when Cedric said he could swim in Hermione's coffee eyes then I knew why it was called An ocean of Coffee.
10/10Author's Response: Thanks for the review! Report Review
He could've just asked Hermione! lol, sorry, I dislike Cassie. She's annoying.Author's Response: Cassie's supposed to be annoying! :) Thanks for reviewing! Report Review
This is the first Hermione/Cedric I've ever read. It's really good! Can't wait to find out what happens next.Author's Response: Thanks for the review! Report Review
Hello! Iím so so sorry for the lateness of your review! You requested it ages ago, but Iíve just been so busy. So now Iíll leave you a nice long one to make up for it. Also, if you want to re-request, please post in my NEW thread.
This idea has some potential. There really arenít that many stories centring around Cedric, especially ones which take place just out of Hogwarts. I also now have a thing about Cedric/Hermione, so I was really excited to read this! Maybe just spend a little more time focusing on each event. One or two parts felt a little rushed. I liked the ending, bringing in Cho. I can definitely see it introducing some drama in the future.
I liked the characterization in this chapter. Cedric seemed quite well in canon, from what we know of him. I especially liked his friends. They seemed to act how normal young adult boys would. You introduced quite a lot of characters in a short space of time though, without giving us much about how they look.
The major thing I think you should work on is description. You had quite a lot of dialogue, and I think you could use some more description to balance this out. Also, work on showing things, not just telling. This improves the flow of the story
The dialogue was mostly fine, although a couple of lines seemed slightly forced. Also, some of the boys had similar voices. But, it is the first chapter and Iím sure this wonít be an issue.
Just one last thing, I really love the title!
Sorry if this review seems a little critical. I really did enjoy this chapter. I just think you need to spend a little time fleshing it out. I hope I helped.
-BeccaAuthor's Response: You weren't critical at all, really. I love all your suggestions, description is definitely my weak point, so thanks for pointing that out. And after description, I'm horrible at keeping things at a slow pace. Thanks for the suggestions, and the nice review! Report Review
great chapter again! :)
I just love Cedric and Hermione
I actually don't know what to say, I'm speechless, this is just amazing :DD
Update soon, please, i can't wait for more!Author's Response: Thanks a bunch! Report Review
Good first chapter. There were a lot of OC's and they all kind of blended together after a while, maybe because their introductions went so fast. Maybe you could put distinguishing characteristics that the reader could remember? Like one could have "stark raven hair" and another could be constantly cracking jokes...
Just some food for thought (: I thought Cedric's POV was very well thought out though and a good read. Nice job!Author's Response: Thanks! I think I did give the OCs distinguishing characterisics, though- Casper works at Honeydukes and sits on the counter, Cassie is the annoying salesgirl at Honeydukes, and Stuart the grump is their manager. Jason is the smart, level-headed friend, and Marty and Adam are the jokers. Sorry if you were confused. Report Review
another great chapter :)
i thought hermione and cedrics interaction was good .
and the whole emily thing .
cant wait for more :)
-GGAuthor's Response: Thanks for the review! Report Review
oh dear, what has cedric done? a fake girlfriend? and Cassie? somehow, i think he's wishing he took harry's plan.
i rather liked this chapter. i'm not a big cedric/hermione fan, but this is kind of making me root for them!
just a note: the characters are british, so they woudl say sweets instead of candy (something i picked up recently)
so instead of hermioen saying "i prefer Muggle candy" she would say "I prefer Muggle sweets"
9.5/10Author's Response: Thanks for the pointing out the candy/sweets thing! I'll edit that in. And thanks for the nice review! Report Review
well, im all up to date with your story now :)
totally loving it,
ive always been a cedric fan but i never reallyy liked to read hermione/cedric fics,
but yours is really something :)
i cant wait for hermione to visit cedric at honeydukes,
that should be fun, especially if cassie is there ;)
anyways great chapter, cant wait for more ! :)
-GGAuthor's Response: Thanks for the review! Report Review
i like this story :)
its something that i dont read at all, to tell you the truth, usually stick to dramiones and ropius
but i felt daring today, and tried out your story, and im glad i did. :)
anyways, ill prob read some more tomorow, so keep a look out for my reviews !
-GGAuthor's Response: I will keep a lookout, thanks! I'm honored that you broke out of the norm to read this. If you have any suggestions, please don't hesitate to put them in a review. Feedback is more valuable than compliments. Report Review
Really good adding to favs! Update soon!
10/10!Author's Response: Thanks for the review! Report Review
Hi, itís fatality from the forums!
So the titleís pretty awesome. It definitely captured my attention and kept my interest as I read this chapter. I loved how canon Cedric was from beginning to end. And I especially adore how you began this chapter with the nightmare. It shows the reader that he is still scarred by that night, which is only natural. So really, the storyís unfolding slowly but surely which is great.
I have to admit though, I wasnít very excited to be reading a Cedric/Hermione ship. Then again I wasnít against it. I just canít imagine anyone else being with Hermione xD But youíre writing was so easy to follow and it truly captured an imagine in my mind. Your Ocs are great but they were a bit confusing seeing as you began the story with um, six new characters? It was a bit much to take in, but then it soon became obvious who was who with the flow of your writing.
Bringing Cho into the end was a great idea. I can imagine Cho creating some drama in future chapters. Be careful with using her though because you wouldnít want your story to be predictable. Good job so far!Author's Response: I tried to make Cedric likable and realistic; I think anybody who had a near death experience like his would be traumatized for awhile.
Since you seem to have nothing against my story, and you just don't like the ship in general, that's fine. I'm like that with a lot of ships. Thanks for keeping an open mind and reviewing anyway! Most others have told me that my OCs aren't too confusing, but I am working on adding more physical descriptions and key traits that will make them more memorable.
I'm being very careful with Cho, but thanks for adding that. I think it's easy to imagine her appearing in the story, but I don't want people to start expecting her whenever things get boring.
Thanks for the great review! Report Review
Hi, good second chapter. The plot is really developing now and it seems good. However I don't understand why Casper was annoyed or whatever he was if he was getting a new job. Maybe your going to clarify that later if not you need to make it more obvious why cause I've got no clue. Also if the quote was meant to be from a textbook you need to make your language more official.
Sparkle xAuthor's Response: Casper wasn't annoyed at getting a new job, he wanted to get Cassie away because he didn't want to talk to her about his personal life, he only wanted to talk to Cedric. Thanks for telling me that, though, I'll clear it up. And yes, the quote was from a textbook, I'm doing my best at making it formal. If you have any suggestions for going about that, don't hesitate to tell me, I'm kind of lost at how to do that. Thanks for the great reviews! Report Review
Oo... cliffhanger! I noticed absolutely nothing wrong! Sorry no crit for this chapter but it's defo got me hooked! Don't bother requesting more reviews I want to r&r this anyway.
Sparkle xAuthor's Response: Thanks for the review, although really, if you find anything at all to suggest please do so. I don't request the reviews for compliments, nice as they are. Report Review
ahh, I just love Cedric and this story!
This is wery well written, it feels like i'd be reading the real HP:)
I can't wait to see what happens next, so hope u can update soon!Author's Response: Thanks, I'm beginning to love Cedric while writing it too. He's really enjoyable. I'm working on chapter four, and with the incredibly short queue right now updates should be fairly quick. Thanks for the spontaneous review! Report Review
hehe, "emily teh girlfriend". poor cedric, he's dug himself a hole. a very big hole.
but just one think: isnt hermione 15, and isnt cedric, like 17/18? so, woudn't anything between them technically be illegal? or are you waiting till hermione turns 16? for anything to actually start between them?
just curious. update soon!Author's Response: As long as Cedric isn't teaching Hermione, it's legal for them to date, I believe. Or is 16 the cutoff age? I'll ask, to be positive. Thanks. And yes, Cedric's in for some trouble, I can tell you! Report Review
I may be getting way ahead of myself, or maybe I'm just looking to boost my ego (lol) but when I read this line, I thought of my 500-word challenge. Behind him, Casper turned a fake gag into a cough. That sentence is so perfect. I understood exactly what you wanted me to see, and it was really funny too! You didn't use too many words to explain a simple idea, and that's why I thought maybe you'd drawn from that challenge... Or maybe you're just awesome. Yeah. =)
Oh, Cho. Still as giggly as ever, aren't we? I like that part of her - you portrayed that well. Do you not like Cho? I kinda got that feeling from this =P Anyway, I find it a bit unbelievable that Cho would just walk up to her ex after a few years and start unloading all this information about her personal life with someone else. I know it had to happen for the story's sake, but it kind of felt like it was a little rushed or something.
I love this chapter! You do a great job of moving the plot along at a reasonable pace, but still you added a clincher at the end. I can't wait for the Cedric/Hermione to start happening! I know you'll do wonderfully.
If you were even a little bit worried about your story after reading mine (Why am I in such an egotistical mood today? Sorry.) you definitely shouldn't be. This story is AWESOME and so realistic. I completely forgot that Cedric was supposed to be dead by now. XD Keep up the good work! I'll be watching this story!
Ganbare! Tanoshinde ^_^
.:.Ilia.:.Author's Response: Haha, maybe I am just awesome. Maybe your challenge infulenced me without my realizing. Anyway, that kind of sentence is the kind I see a lot in writing, and I always admire it. I finally had a situation where I could use it myself.
I'm not completely happy with the Cho scene; for several reasons. Firstly, it's not that I don't like Cho, but in a C/H she kind of has to be portrayed as the bad guy, for people to continue wanting it to be a C/H. I do think she was a little out of character, but if you just imagine that she thinks she and Cedric are exes that are still friends, then hopefully it isn't too awful. Drop me a comment if you have any more to help me smooth that part out.
I'm so unused to writing potentially long stories that I feel like the plot is moving far too slow, then I stop and remind myself that it's going fine and I need to be more patient.
Haha, him dying seems odd now to me. I'm totally immersed in his post Hogwarts life.
Thanks a million for the incredibly encouraging review! Report Review
So it's been a million years and I'm finally here. I'm sorry it's taken me so long to get here, but I'm here now. =) I can guarantee my reviews won't be as uplifting as yours - yours are awesome! - but I'll do my best.
I love the concept of this - Cedric is not dead and he's getting another chance at finishing school because of the Tournament, which went awry last year. I have seen a few fics that deal with Cedric staying alive. It's interesting, if I may say so myself - I would like to give some thought to what and who Cedric would become if he were given the chance... Great idea!
I LOVE the opening scene! I wasn't expecting it to be a dream at all. You really transported me back to that time, and I love that! It was right at the beginning of the chapter, but I was already enthralled and set in the mood. I was really surprised when it ended up being a dream. Brilliant!
Your characterization of Cedric is WAY different than mine, to say the least XD But I do like what you've done with him. He sounded a tinge whiny a few times, but I think that's allowed - he almost died, as he said.
I love that you're bringing Cho into this. Because I know it will end up a Cedric/Hermione, adding Cho into the mix is a nice way to stir up some drama. =)
Great read! I look forward to reading chapter two ^_^
Ganbare! Tanoshinde ^_^
.:.Ilia.:.Author's Response: I'm still honored you appreciate my reviews so much. :)
I really needed a way to explain Cedric surviving without a prologue or cheesy spoken explanation. A dream seemed the answer. I'm so glad it worked!
I figure that romances aren't easy and Cho won't entirely disappear from Cedric's life; thus her appearance.
Thanks for the great review! I promise, it was entirely uplifting. Don't be afraid to be as harsh as I know you're capable of. Report Review
Wow, this is really, really good.
First of all, the title is really intriguing...I can't wait to see how that comes into play. I love all things coffee, so I think that was one of the reasons I decided to read this.
Cedric's voice is very real and I find myself feeling sorry for him at the way all of his friends don't believe him about Voldemort being back. Its nice to see him alive though - I always felt bad that Cedric died so young. Just one question though - he's alive because the curse missed, right?
I really cannot wait to see where you go with this and Cedric's reaction to whatever it was that Arthur handed him.
Cozy Cassie is hysterical...I found myself chuckling every time I read that. My annoying cousin is named Cassie and it just made me think of her.
Ok, I feel like I'm rambling, so I'm going to go. Great chapter! I can't wait to see where you go with this. 10/10Author's Response: The title won't make sense for a few chapters, if I stick to my planning. However, it was one of those titles that came to me literally in the middle of the night and I rushed to write it down then went back to bed, so hoepfully it'll all make sense in the end.
Yes, Harry saw that something bad was about to happen, and Cedric ducked, and the spell missed.
Cassie was meant to be a bit of comic relief... I figure she can just pop up when anyone's too down and the story will be a good balance of happy and sad... Funny about your cousin. Maybe Cassie's just an annoying name. :P
Thanks for the great review! Report Review
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