KATE! I'm here for your review! What an amazing story you've written here!
I don't know what I was expecting when I started reading, but whatever it was this DEFINITELY exceeded it. There is something dark and haunting about this that just gives me chills when I read it. Your words in describing Pansy - exotic and ethereal - could easily do double duty in describing the story itself.
Pansy's short encounter with George is just wonderful. The moment where they both realize the know each other is just great - DEFINITELY not something you would expect/want in that sort of situation. But, it works out for both of them, doesn't it. So odd to have the two of them share such a stripped down, real moment. Yet, it seems to be just what each of them needed, and I can't help but hope George went away with the courage to do something to improve his life - we know Pansy did!
And then the ending! XD I love the fact that you didn't have Draco (who I am sure a lot of people suspected - I know I did!) as the one who is controlling Pansy, and instead went with Blaise. A very unexpected choice, and displays a surprising amount of evil in Blaise - that he would take someone who was an equal to him, and reduce them to this. And then you leave us hanging! What happens? Does she take Blaise by surprise? Does he get the best of her? I almost get the feeling that Pansy doesn't really expect to make it through what happens next, but it doesn't really matter (well, it does but it doesn't, if that makes any sense?) The fact that Pansy has chosen to stand up for herself, to fight back, in and of itself returns to her the dignity that she has lost.
Very deep, very dark and very beautiful. Love it!Author's Response: OMG I DONT KNOW WHAT TO SAY!!!
thank you for such an incredible review!!
pansy is such a tragic character in this, as is george - they all are really, even blaise. i mean, what is going on in his head to keep someone in a situation such as this??
it was so hard to find a way to bring them together so that it was real enough to work. Kali gave me the prompt and i though, GAH challenge!! I am so pleased i pulled it off though!
i almost used draco, because i am so used to using him as the bad guy, but decided not too.
i like to think she kills him, or perhaps they kill each other. i don't know. i don't think there is a 'happy' ending for pansy, not in this story. and yes, you are totally correct - she gets some of her dignity back, no matter what the cost in the end.
thank you SO MUCH hunny!! I am thrilled you enjoyed this!!
Kate xx Report Review
Oh, this gave me chills in the end! Your description is so vivid but not fantastic, rather it is raw and purely human in the best way. I really loved this. Pansy's situation drags the reader right now with her. And I loved it even more that you acknowledged the oft-told story of Draco's manipulation of her and then rejected it.
I feel like the man really could have been anyway, you could have gone a lot of ways with that, but choosing George was brilliant because it just drives home the point that she is not who she once was. Once, there would have been no interaction between them, now the hostility is just an echo.
Really wonderful job on this story!Author's Response: hey darling
i wanted this to be raw, so thank you. it is not pretty, not delicate - it is base and intense and there is no way i would ever want to be pansy here!
i did not want it to be draco. like she says, he doesn't have the tenacity to do something like that.
George was chosen for me - Kali gave me an excellent prompt, and i just had to work around it. i would never have thought of him myself probably.
thank you darling! i am thrilled you liked it!
xx Report Review
Oh goodness... this probably my single favourite thing you've ever written... which is saying something as I do so adore your writing. There were too many gorgeous little fragments in this story, beautiful and heartbreaking imagery. It's pared back and imperfect, showing the dirty undertow that exists beyond. Especially when contrasted against this depiction of Pansy and Blaise in their youth:
"She and he were the same, once. Peas in a pod. Fresh and new and filled with ideals."
I thought it was wonderfully insightful. Have you ever seen the movie Lantana? It's an Aussie film, anyway, I digress. The symbols just reminded me of the film and the plant in many ways. The glossy, beautiful finish and the murky weeds that linger underneath. Your Pansy's strikes me as quite the same.
In any case, I thought your figurative language and evocative imagery were shown to their best in this story. Short, crisp sentences punctuating the otherwise languid prose. Very lovely and very dark all at once.
xox KylieAuthor's Response: hey my love
wow really? your favourite thing?? -sque-
thank you once again for totally understanding this!! you always get my writing, and i love you for it!
Lantana is an amazing film! Deadly Sins is very loosely based on it, and yes, i can see the symbolism here too so thank you! im glad you noticed that about this fic and about pansy because she is very much like a weed - beautiful on the outside, but damaged and impure underneath.
wow kylie- what wonderful praise!! thank you thank you thank you! i am thrilled you liked this hun!!
Kate xx Report Review
Holy eff, Kate. Why haven't I read this yet? Kick me. Ow, thanks. :P
I have never read a Pansy so pitiable. I haven't read much about Pansy at all actually, but I think you've changed my mind about her worth. The grim poetry in your words is just amazing. It flows around like smoke that grasps me and surrounds me and pulls me in so completely. Odd simile, but there you have it. :)
Your writing is so full of imagery, and this does not fall short of what I've come to expect of you. Which is brilliance, and something beautiful beyond that. This is beautiful. Not heartbreaking or tender like Solace, but ripe with rage and injustice. This is the darker side of loss and desolation.
I adore you Kate, you and your amazing work.
~ShilohAuthor's Response: shiloh you makes me smile xD
no i won't kick you - thats mean :P
pansy is love. i adore writing her - there is so much that can be done with her character. kalina gave me the beautiful plot idea for this and yea, a piteful pansy was the only pansy that would work. i don't think even someone like her (or the pansy we see in the books) would have chosen a life like this.
thank you darling!!!
kate xx Report Review
Wow. This is what good writing is, perfect figurative language and raw human emotion laced together in just the right way. "Good" isn't a strong enough word, of course, but squeeful words can't describe how much I love the way you write. I don't think I've ever read something by you before, or if I did, it was a long time ago. But this... this is one of the best stories I've ever read, not only on the site, but off it as well. It's the kind of story I'd expect to see in a literary journal (without the fanfiction side of it). I was mesmerised by this story, and usually that's hard to get when reading on a computer screen.
The beginning was my favourite part with the personification of night and misery, then into the description of Pansy (both physically and psychologically). I really liked how you provided deep description without making it too long or dreary - it was vivid, but not flowery. And yet I get a Moulin Rouge feel from the exoticism, the red room and Pansy's situation. So you've somehow combined sumptuousness with simplicity in your language, and I think that's what I love most about this story.
There was one typo I noticed, and that's about all the critique I can offer: "She is small in statue" should read "stature" instead.
I didn't pay much attention to the canon side of things, mostly because Pansy and Blaise are such unknown characters, even moreso post-DH. I do like how Pansy and George talked about loss and how they've never gotten over their losses. That conversation gave Pansy power again, made her remember herself. That ending line is perfect, with Pansy having that epiphany. I love it when stories end like that, which only gave me another reason to like this. ;) I'll stop blathering now. It's an excellent piece of writing, and I'd love to read more of your work. :D This is definitely hitting my favourites list.Author's Response: O.O
wow susan! i don't know what to say ... i am really blown away by this review! i guess thank you would be a start so THANK YOU!!!
im so pleased you enjoyed this! oh the beginning. the idea - those exact words actually - popped into my head in the shower :P not the most ideal place to have story ideas!! somehow, i managed to hold the lines there all night! and get them down the next day! usually, i fail at that ^_-
yes the moulin rouge was a bit of an inspiration, i must admit! (not the film - i was thinking of an amazing documentary i watched on it once).
eeek typo! thank you!
yeah poor pansy. she needed someone like george to come along and kick her in her proverbial backside, lol
thank you so much susan - you don't know how happy this has made me!!
kate xx Report Review
Hi! Georgia here from Aparecium with your review :)
I was really excited to come back with a review for you! So, first off, this was amazing. I just loved the whole concept - Pansy in this scummy, horrible lifestyle, and you can just feel the resentment pouring out of the words. Really, it was amazing. I've never seen anything quite like this and really that is just amazing - a breath of fresh air in a room full of recycled stories :) Just amazing. I'll address all of your concerns;
Characterisation: I just loved Pansy. I thought she was wonderfully broken - she was so resolute to break from her personal hell, in a roundabout kind of way, but it took someone else's motivation to make her do it. I really adored her character and the title (which I am in love with) just fits Pansy so well. George was brilliantly written too - the guilt of being with Angelina isn't often explored in fanfiction, and I like that aspect of this story. Blaise's character was fantastically cruel, too, and the dominance he had over Pansy was so clear. It like, well, why wouldn't he be like that? Very convincing.
Flow: Perfect. At no point in the story was I lost or confused, and everything was transitioned flawlessly. Every thought, for me, was clear and concise and everything smoothly moved along, plot-wise.
Narrative voice: As I have said, I loved Pansy. I thought she was amazing. Her "voice" throughout the piece was simply stunning - you captured every emotion, every detail and EVERYTHING just brilliantly, I have no complaints. Wonderful work!
In short, this was amazing. You should be proud of yourself - this one shot was perfect, in my opinion. You managed to set up a very complex scenario quite perfectly in such a short piece and I really commend you for it. Well done ^_^
10/10Author's Response: oh georgia thank you! what a wonderful review!!
i love writing pansy and i love writing characters who are broken and torn apart. somehow, i find that easier than writing happy people :P (don't ask me why - im not a depressed person in RL - it just works out better for me this way, lol).
ah george. i have never written him i don't think. the angelina part is totally attributed to kalina - the plot bunny was her idea totally!
blaise is my love. nasty or nice, i love him!!!
im glad this all made sense and that it flowed smoothly. i was a little worried that in parts, it was disjointed and would be confusing.
thank you darling! i'm so happy you liked this!!
kate xx Report Review
Oh my god, this was... amazing. Just... really intriguing and amazing.
I don't think I've ever read anything like it before. Ever. I mean, it's so great to read something new, especially with all the recycled and reused plot ideas out there. It was like a breath of fresh air, and was so new and exciting to me that I couldn't tear my eyes away from the screen. Really brilliant job for coming up with such a unique idea.
I think Parkinson is such a complex character, and I'm surprised people don't write about her more often. We know nothing about her after the war, and this gave the reader a dark and horrific view into her life after school. I was immensely interested through the whole thing, and my attention never wavered. You do a great job of exploring her mind and giving the reader a look into her inner, deeper thoughts.
Your voice as a writer came through so strongly in this, which is just fantastic. I mean, especially because it's such a unique voice, and one that, like I said, captures your attention and holds you there until you're done writing. Before I had read this, I was searching through the list of one-shots and looking for a story that had good style, which I found immediately with yours. Kudos to you for having such strong writing talent!
Yeah, I don't think I have anything to complain about. I mean, your use of words was just brilliant through the whole thing, especially in this line: "The malice rotting in her heart made her less than human and she waits patiently for the day it will consume her. " I don't know why I like it so much, but I found that line to be one of my favorites.
Great, great job! I'm really impressed. Thanks so much for publishing such a masterful piece!
- RinAuthor's Response: oh rin thank you so much!
what a wonderful review!! im so glad you liked this!
i know! i love pansy - she is the new hermione, to me, lol. i love to write her in so many different ways, although, i don't think ive ever written a happy pansy ... may have to try that ^_^
the plot is totally credited to Kalina - she gave me the prompt and the situation the characters were in, so kudos to kali!!
thank you darling - i don't know what else to say other than im so pleased you liked it!!
thank you for reading!!
kate xx Report Review
Ooh, I've never read any of your work until now, but I think I'm going to have to start! (I saw your post at TGS in the New Story thread.) You have a really nice way of weaving words together. Your descriptions and imagery have an ethereal quality to them, but at the same time they're so vivid that they're tangible. I always notice really nice descriptive language because I personally fail at it (haha). For example, the very first line absolutely hooked me.
This was an interesting couple to bring together, especially in the way you did it. Generally I'm not a big fan of any kind of "good guy"/"bad guy" pairing, but on the other hand I don't think I'd necessarily consider this a pairing. More like an encounter, if you know what I mean. You took two characters who come from very different paths and caused them to wind up in the same place, in a rather believable way.
It's difficult to make me feel a lot of emotions for...well, I'll say it...pretty much all of the Slytherin characters. It's just a knee-jerk reaction I have; I don't like them. But I felt for Pansy's plight, partially because I take a big interest in issues like forced prostitution, and even more so because you dealt with such a touchy issue in a tasteful way and wrote it so vividly.
The whole "goddess rising" theme -- and the title, of course -- were wonderful and exquisite. I loved the ending. It felt empowering.
The one piece of criticism I have -- and I don't know if you could even consider it criticism, as it's more of a stylistic or personal preference thing -- is that I think it would have been awesome if you had not revealed Blaise's identity. I think keeping the identity of her oppressor a mystery would have...I don't know, made the whole situation seem bigger, if you get my drift. More ominous and suspenseful. Turning the "everyman" concept on its head, using it with the antagonist rather than the protagonist. Like it could have been anyone, anywhere. But anyhow...it all depends on the effect you were going for, and I thought this was a beautiful one-shot.
10/10Author's Response: O.O
woah. mammoth review - thanks so much ^_^
im so glad you liked this hun. i don't know what else to say in response to this - honestly, i don't, lol. im just pleased it came off ok. i was a little unsure about the ending but im happy it seemed to work.
yeah i was considering not mentioning blaise's name but for some reason, i wanted readers to know it was him.
thank you - im so sorry this response is lacking in anything intelligent :P im just really pleased you liked it!!
kate xx Report Review
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