This is a good story! I like it, it really brings out the emotional side of me heh heh.Author's Response: Haha. That's good! Thanks for the review! Report Review
:) I liked it. The interaction between James and Lily was great, sweet, and awkward, and heartwarming. And I love Sirius. Someone needs to tell James when he's being an idiot.
I'm keeping my fingers crossed for the extra chapters. I think that Lily and James both have a lot of healing to do, and I'm very interested in reading more about it. However, the ending to this is fine, if it must do. :( I can't wait for the next chapter! (Even if it is the epilouge.)Author's Response: Thank you very much. Haha, I love Sirius too, no one can hit some sense into James like him.
Yeah, as it looks now, the only thing on the way is the epilogue :) Thanks for the review! Report Review
Oh, so the plan is to go out for professional Quidditch, and now added to that is ask for Lily's forgiveness. I do wish the bloke luck, as that is quite the list of things to accomplish. At least in doing so James shall be cleaning up his act, non?
Anyway, another good chapter, I love that Sirius is back in James' life. They have such a great bond and you write it well. All of Sirius' training and smart remarks make me smile, and is just what James needs currently.
Nice chapter, my dear!
ColletteAuthor's Response: Yeah, he's got a lot of ideas, but you have to have dreams to keep you going, that's what he's been missing after the accident.
Yeah, I love Sirius being back too, they've missed each other. So even though the tone can be sharp and Sirius can say something, it's all for the good.
Thank you very much for the review!! Report Review
You are back now, yes? :)
I remember you had requested this story from me sometime ago, and I enjoyed what I had read and then I saw it in the queue and figured since I had time I should read more. But, oh my gosh, I had forgotten where I had left off with James hitting Lily!!! I had completely and utterly forgotten until I read it here.
Anyway, this chapter was good, I always love your Marauders stuff, the dynamic between James and Sirius is just as strong as I think it would have always been. I am so glad James has decided to clean up his act, and that Sirius is going to help him!
Off to the next chapter then, good job here, darling!
ColletteAuthor's Response: Yes, I am back to cold, cold Denmark :P
Oh, you remembered my story :D That warms a little bit. haha. I know the feeling, it's easy to forget with all those stories out there, but when getting back, it seems impossible.
James and Sirius are my favourites to write together. The way they interact, both when having fun, but also when dealing with more serious and mature stuff, like here.
Thanks very much! Report Review
Wow...Amazing, yet again. I feel so sorry for Lily, but I feel bad for James too. I can't wait for the next chapter...
~LilyFireAuthor's Response: Me too, I feel sorry for both of them, but really they just have to be better at listening (mostly James here). Thanks for the review! Report Review
*Eyes about to pop out of head* OMG! This is horrible!!! So amazing! Loved this chapter! James? Whats wrong with you? Sorry just had to ask! Update soon! Loved Loved Loved!!! -CharlyAuthor's Response: Haha. Yes, horrible. But let's see how it turns out, shall we? ;) Thanks for the review! Report Review
Whoa. The emotions that are mixed into this story are amazing. I can't even think to describe them as well as you do. They are written to perfection.
You also do a fabulous job of making the story very unpredictable and I love it! Of course I just love all of your stories. You are one talented writer. I really can't wait for the next chapters to come, I hope I don't die from the suspense.Author's Response: Wow, thanks so very much. I think this is one of my most emotionel stories, so I'm glad you like it as it is.
Haha. it's funny. One thing I don't see myself as is unpredictable, but I'm glad you do. And even more that you like more than just this of my stories. Thanks! Report Review
Hello! Again. Well, this is the last one. Sigh... I'm going to miss this... :D Hope you write another one soon!Author's Response: Haha. The next one is up. Thanks for the reviews! Report Review
Hey! Haha, it feels so weird reading this with the whole April Fool's thing going on... Yeah, now what I presume is 'wand' is 'banana' and Lily is Jily. It's funny! But good stuff anyway :"DAuthor's Response: Ohh, I missed the April's Fool... But sounds like fun :P Report Review
Lovely... Absolutely lovely. I'd forgotten about this fanfic and now that I've come back on, it seems even better than I remember! Well done with this chapter; the intensity is on high!Author's Response: Haha. Fantastic. I'm glad you like it. Thanks! Report Review
Per usual, a wonderful story. I can't wait for the rest...
~LilyFireAuthor's Response: Thanks very much! Next is up! Report Review
It's me...from TGS =]] This chapter was...unbelievingly brilliant. Where to begin?
Okay, so Lily walks in the house, gets rid of James' HOrse, tells him to take a shower and starts cleaning? And James decides to act like an immature baffoon (aah how do you spell that?), resulting in abusing Lily? That's some deep stuff, but so typical of James. I thought that seeing Lily with another man would have turned him around, not make him worse =]
Okay, let's start at the beginning. James' HOrse. I named her Bonquisha, because...I just wasn't satisfied with just knowing that her name started with a B. What was she feeling during this time? Some 'other woman' just walks in and steals her client/man? She knew his name was James, was it just because she had a good memory or she actually liked him? And will we be seeing more of her? Perhaps under a different name?
It was kind of funny to see James trying to hide the alcoholic drink, but also sad. One has to wonder what ever happened to him for him to end up like this. I think he's acting melodramatic =]
Kudos to Lily for trying to change him, even with her Luigi/Mario boyfriend. I am sure that a part of her loves him very much, preferably on a deeper level than with her boyfriend. They are Lily and James after all, abeit how OC the situation is (though I don't mind since it's a good plot). It just sucks that James threw her against the wall. Who'd want to come home to that?
I think you transitioned the slightly humouress/ really pitiful scene where James hides his alcohol to where he threw Lily against the wall very well. And then you did it again when James saw the fear in Lily.
The ending gave me inspiration...James wants to change his life! Hell yeah! Go James *indian call*!
When are we going to see more characters? Remus? Peter? Sirius? And I'm sorry for the lack of grammar critique...I don't think there was any, and if there was, I was too immersed in the story to notice ;)Author's Response: Hey again!
I like that you use the word typical about James. It's hard ot write such a situation with a good character, and make it believeable. Accidents can happen, but the reason has to be ... well, reasonable in a way. Right? And Lily, well, she's just Lily.
Bonquisha, I like that name. But let's be clear, James wasn't her client, he just simply couldn't remember her name, and he had picked her up from some bar. No, Bonquisha is out. Random baar-chicks don't go.
Melodramatic might beone world. Childish is another ;)
Haha. Well, Lily cares, and no boyfriend can change that. And yeah, James always have a special place in Lily's heart. How can he not? And even though he did what he did, she obviously still cares ;)
Ahh, thanks. Very important to make it seem strange, out of place to change from one mood to another.
They other characters... Sirius, yes. But I don't really yet know about Remus and Peter. Depends on how far I write the story.
Thanks yet again for a great review! Report Review
i love this chapter because i love how james is so brave and trying to make lily go back to him even though he knows that she's with some other guy and has probably moved on...but maybe lily will always have a weak spot for him and im hoping that she does go back to james...
my fav part:
James covered his face in his hands and groaned, “I can’t believe this is happening! I can’t believe it! You’re making Lily marry another man!”
...haaha...it so funny how james makes it seem like lily's being forced to marry someone!! ahha...Author's Response: Yeah, both Lily and James have weak spots for each other. Haha, yeah, it was the intention of the line. Of course that would be Lily's own choice :P THanks for the review! Report Review
I love the story. A little disappointed there won't be updates but Costa Rica! That's awesome! Hopefully it will inspire you with all sorts of wonderful ideas for all you fantastic stories!Author's Response: Thanks very much! Yeah, Costa Rica is absolutely awesome. Report Review
Hello, darling! I'm here for your review.
I liked that this had a short bit of humour in the beginning, the whole rum decisions was funny. For the beginning of this chapter I kept hearing 'Why is all the rum gone?' in my head from POTC. It made me laugh...
But then I stopped, James, James, James. Not good at all! Glad he realises what up though, through his utter screw up. Poor nice, Lily was just trying to help him, and he mucked that up for certain! Now, he can fix himself, he knows he must. I am very curious to see how he does that, as well as how it makes it better between Lily, because that is going to take a miracle!
Excellent chapter, love! You are really doing well wit this story, I am enjoying it a lot. The characterisation is steady, and the plot is moving nicely. Come back and request the next chapter anytime.
ColletteAuthor's Response: Haha. I was actually a little afraid of getting too close to POTC - also, it was an inspiration, to tell the truth. I'm kind of glad you can see it - or hear it :P
James is an idiot, who's handeling it all wrong. But yes, he can fix it, just not alone.
It's nice to know it really works all together. Thanks very much for yet another great review! Report Review
Congratulations, Trusted Author!
I think it's funny that James' hunger is intersperced with his feelings for Lily in this chapter. It made me laugh.
PPAuthor's Response: Thanks very much! Glad it made you laugh! Thanks for the review! Report Review
I believe he can do it, too.
Off to read more.
PPAuthor's Response: It's good to hear! Thanks for the review! Report Review
I LOVED IT! So cute. Though I REALLY want James to get rid of that beer gut...gross. But I thought this chapter was so good just like all the other ones and I hope you have fun on your trip and can't wait for new update! *Claps and loads of cookies* -CharlyAuthor's Response: Haha. Yeah, me too. It's not big, but it's there :P Thanks very much for the review! Report Review
First off, I would like to apoligise for the fact that I haven't been on in forever. This is definitely one of my favourite stories, and I feel like rubbish for not getting here sooner. With that being said, let's get on with the review! It's Constants from TGS by the way =]]
I just have one thing to say. James let himself go. Seriously; when you think about it, it's just pitiful the way he's acting. Ever since his Quidditch (is that spelled with one d? oh no, I forget...*plunges into darkness*) career went down the toilet, he turns into a drunk?
I don't blame Lily for leaving him.
Seriously, though. I pity the dude. I hope that by the end of this story, he will have the self-motivation to go out and do something with his life. Chances are, he will, as Harry wasn't born out of thin air. Which brings me to my next point of discussion. Lily.
To add insult to injury, she's in another relationship. That really sucks. I'm not too sure about Marlon, thogh. The name reminds me of "Mario"...or "Luigi," urgh. I'm imaging him with a 'fro.
This is absolutely no critisism whatsoever. The way you are writing now is absolute perfection. I wouldn't change any of it. I guess it's because you're from TGS, and I'm building this stereotype that every member from TGS is an absolute genius when it comes to writing.
Can't wait to read the next chapter...really!Author's Response: Don't worry about it! You got here :P
Yes, James' way of reacting is very... well, childish in a way really. Haha, yes, it was spelled correctly :)
Lily left him long before, but this too was hia fault in a way. Which he still is sorry about. Very much.
Haha. I hadn't thought of Marlon that way. But it made me laugh... He could have an afro :D
Well, all members of TGS are geniuses :P haha. Thanks for taking the time even though it was late. It doesn't matte. Report Review
wow!! i loved this chapter!! james is turning around! he even didnt take to the temptation of drinking...i love that he used lily to stop himself from not drinking...i loved that he went to his best friend for help and admitted to something that must have been hard for him to accept too...i really loved this chapter!! update soon...Author's Response: Thanks very much! I personally think the problem really is admitting that you have a problem. For James it was to overcome his pride, but Lily really is the reason :) Thanks for the review. Report Review
Hello, darling! Happy Christmas!
Thanks for coming back with another chapter. First, to yours concerns, I think the beginning was fine. It was very much a believable drunkenness. Which, from how James seemed to take the news last chapter, is very much understood that he would act in such a way. That all seemed fine dear. And your concerns for Lily, I don't think it was too much out of character. I think if it all had gone further, that could be called 'out of character' for her. It would be very true for her to have concerns.
No matter how long it had been since they dated, I think she would still have some sort of feeling for him. We can assume he was her first love, and you never forget your first love. She still cares, and though James says he 'doesn't feel anything for her' I think deep down he does. Though he burried her away now, it is only a bout of time before those feelings start to come back. That's just my take.
Good chapter, love, really! I can't wait to see what happens next, if Lily and James meet up, and what is up with this new bloke of Lily's. Is he really Muggle? or is this James's though?
As always, do come back and request more chapter!. You are doing really well in this writing that you often don't divulge into!
ColletteAuthor's Response: Haha. I was trying to recreate the randomness of the mind when being drunk. And for Lily, I just wanted her to seem concerned enough. I think James was - in this story - Lily's first real love. And for James, he's really just trying to convince himself, which he never was good at, nor will he ever be.
Marlon is a Muggle, and Lily and James are going to meet again. Trust me ;P
Thanks once again! Your reviews are truly great and make me smile :) Report Review
Love, it has been too long, just as you said! I hope you have been doing well. Okay, now for the review! I am so happy you can to request; it seems like ages since I have read your lovely work. I have been so busy that catching things in the queue has been… well non-existent!
Drama, Romance and Angst—who doesn’t love it! Ha. A different area you say, it is a bit dark for what I have read of yours.
Might I first say that I LOVED the first three paragraphs! The amount of emotion you showed in James was great! But, WHAT THE BLOODY HECK HAPPENED TO HIM! He landed on a spear? How? How did this come about?
And then Lily, what happened there? How did that end like it did?
Vicki, you have left me with so many questions. I think this is going well so far. I really do. Though you may not think it is a typical area you write, I think it did well, there was drama, there was angst and there was the longing of romance. I love it so far.
Please, do come back and request the next chapter, I am very curious for more!
ColletteAuthor's Response: Haha, yeah. Too long :P You're not the only one who's been too busy to read anything! I've been swamped to put it mildly.
Yeah, it's the darkness I'm not very familiar with. I worked a lot with the first few paragraphs as you point out, I wanted them to be very emotional and really start this story right on.
I'm not sure with the details, but it was an accident, as happen, but thi sjust ended badly. I needed him to be really, really hurt and not able to play anymore. It's the essence of this :P
We'll get back to the breakup in a later chapter :D
Thanks for this review, Collette. I'll get back to you very soon! Report Review
Once again a great chapter. Can't wait till the next chapter.Author's Response: Thanks a lot! Report Review
LOVE IT! I think that pretty much covers everything! The Part when James is telling Sirius about Hitting Lily was so adorable! I loved it! Update soon! This story is so amazing so far! Awesome Job! *Claps and a cookie* -CharlyAuthor's Response: Haha. I like that! I was actually nervous about that part. How to write it with the right emotions without overdoing or underdoing it? Thanks for the review! Report Review
Good chapter, Keep going. It was a little slow, remember the details, and description.Author's Response: Thanks for the review! Report Review
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