Enjoying story. So sorry for your loss. Report Review
Major league "aww" moment. Very well done.
You've managed to mix the humor and drama together here very well, right down to Ginny's near inexplicable crying jag (I say near inexplicable because pregnant women never need a reason to cry).
This was great: "hey I lost my job because I'm knocked up"
Truly an excellent read; I thoroughly enjoyed the whole story.
Eldy Report Review
You're the only other author I've met out here in potterdom that completes their tales before posting. That's really appreciated!
Perfect flourishes with the ring, new broom, owl and kneazle. Everythng just seems to be coming together nicely. And the tryouts were great!
Now, when does Rita get what's coming to her?
Off for more
Eldy Report Review
I want Rita Skeeter's head on a pike!
Sorry, better now.
Great chapter. That Prophet article was diabolically, evilly, brilliant. Can't wait for the pay-back. And, I thought the convo H/G had in the restaurant was very in-character and well done.
Must read on.
Eldy Report Review
Why on earth doesn't this chapter have any reviews?
Ok. The baby carrier thing was brilliant. Hermione to the rescue!! But, I think you've got the weariness inherent in calming an unhappy infant down perfectly here. Bone-weariness is a better word. I could feel Ginny's back-ache. However, I especially thought this captured things best:
"He looked down at his godson and couldn't blame him for being upset. Both his parents had died, and now his grandmother was hurt and he was staying in a new house. He leaned his head down and kissed the top of the baby's head, which was neon blue at the moment."
And Harry's line about letting Ginny see him starkers to even things up? Priceless!
Eldy Report Review
Terribly sorry about the miscarriage. And sorry that my condolences are not timely. It must have been exceptionally difficult to finish this chapter in light of that. It is a testament not only to your writing prowess but to your strength of spirit that this chapter is so well done.
The attack on Andromeda was unexpected; although Harry's reaction, ordering Ginny home, was not. And Mrs. Weasley showing up to help Ginny care for Teddy, with the attendant flourishes, was well done.
A superb chapter.
Eldy Report Review
Alright. The entire Krum/Ginny flirting thing was done like a pro!
Loved the reference to Harry (Barney) telling Krum that Ginny's boyfriend is a big bloke, jealous type (recently re read DH and had forgot about that part, which got me laughing).
But the best had to be:
"Six?...How could any man get close enough to marry you?"
Followed by: "Who is you husband?"
And then Victor's very gracious exit remarks.
Just liked it all. A lot.
Eldy Report Review
"I didn't see my parents in my dream." His cheeks flushed, clearly embarrassed."What did you see then, Harry? What is the deepest desire of your heart?"... "I saw you."
That was simply amazingly well done! Brilliant flourish.
Sorry, I haven't gotten back to this tale quicker - holiday craziness. Now that I have a chance to breathe, I'm gonna see how much I can read tonight.
Really liked the baby-related flourishes here. From your author's notes, it appears, in part, that you're writing from experience and it shows. Your magical twists on pregnancy and the like really are excellent.
Off for more.
Happy New Year.
EldyAuthor's Response: Thank you for the excellent reviews. I smiled reading through them. I'll respond to all of them when I get a chance, but wanted to say this right off. I've had the holiday insanity around here as well.
I have a lot of baby experience. I have my own kids, I babysit/do day care and we're foster parents, so kids all over the place!
Happy New Years to you as well! Report Review
Great ending! I feel guilty that I've not done a lot of reviewing. Please fix the places where the type style is way too small, and please keep writing.
JetLaBargeAuthor's Response: I tried to fix it and couldn't get it to work. I'll see if my husband can help me get it right. Report Review
I really enjoyed this story. It worked. nothing too far stretched.Author's Response: That's the tough/fun part about it for me- I wanted it to be "possible" if not probable that things could have gone that way. I'm sure they didn't and I'd love to know what JKR has to say on it, but alas, just my fun times playing in her world. Report Review
Aw, that's such a great way to end the story! Thanks so much for writing this, it's been awesome to read!Author's Response: I'm glad you liked it! Report Review
"I will choose you, us, everytime."
Well, isn't that cute? Just makes me want to be a better person. This was a very loving and fun fanfiction, it just made my heart flutter and my face smile in every chapter.Author's Response: aw thank you! I'm glad you enjoyed it. Report Review
WHAT?!?!?!?! Only one more :(. but but but i wanted more.Author's Response: I know... when I started I honestly thought it would be longer, but better finished and a bit shorter than longer and maybe never done. Report Review
YAY! and awww he can be sooo cheesey!Author's Response: I'm all for light and mostly fluffy. m cheese... I love cheese hehe Report Review
I love this story so far! I bet they will do great!Author's Response: I'm a happy ending sucker so it's a safe bet :D Report Review
I like the story so far. The newspaper article and some other parts are coming out very small. I think you need to work on your HTML coding. There is a good article on the site on how to do it. I use the simple editor in my stories, and once you learn how to use it it works much better.
Nice that Harry and Ginny are not rushing to have sex, but are awkward around each other. Good job showing Ginny's doubts.Author's Response: I'll see if I can get that fixed. Report Review
Its always nice to run into another "adult" out here in Potterdom; reassures me I'm not alone in my second childhood ;)
Excellent start to the tale! Found it favorited by one of my readers. This is very believable (although I'm tempted to think they might've consumated their relationship). You've caught the fear/angst here very well. As well as the nature of the Harry/Ginny 'ship. Most fanfic authors go in for the over-the-top, they're-so-in-love everything's gonna be fine, approach, which is unrealistic and over done (mea culpa!), this is a refreshing look at the realities of love and marriage.
Great start and I'll be back for more soon.
EldyAuthor's Response: Thank you, I'm glad you like it. I do strive for realistic situations, although my earlier stuff was a bit more fanciful.
Sarah Report Review
YelloWitchGrl: First let me say that I am so sorry for your loss. I think you are amazing for writing a lovely story about this subject matter when you are experiencing this type of trauma in your life. My only wish is that by writing this excellent story, you have a chance to find solace and peace by expressing yourself. You are a very brave person.
This story is well written and your depiction of the characters is spot on. The dialogue between Harry and Ginny is engaging. I thought the little subplots about Fluer and Bill and Viktor were interesting and nicely done. Teddy's impact on Harry and Ginny is an excellent storyline and now you've added some intrigue with the attack on Andromeda. Can't wait to see what Ginny does to Harry for sending her home out of harm's way. In some respects I think Harry should know that doing that to Ginny would make facing Voldemort look like a walk in the park. I'd have Poppy standing by if I were Harry. Nice touch though of having Ginny care for Teddy and having Molly come by because "she just knew' Ginny would need some help.
I not into a lot of fluff but this is really a nice story that deals with real life situations and you're capturing its essence. Well done and I will keep reading. I am a fan. PWAuthor's Response: Thank you. It was good, in a weird way, finishing the story. It was closing the chapter on a book that I started before my first miscarriage. I hate leaving things undone. It just bugs me.
I'm so into fluff. Usually not the annoyingly overly sweet fluff, but stuff that I can see as really having a chance of happening. I'm glad you liked it and hopefully the next chapter gets validated shortly. Report Review
If you find writing cathartic it is well worth taking your time finishing the story. If your life is a little at loose ends now maybe finishing something will feel good.
A good story starts out with a good premise, which your story has. Then you have to develop it, see how it plays out. So far you are doing a good job of it. I do not like the "all sweetness and light" fluff. I do not think that is Rowling's universe or the real world. The all battles and trouble post DH stories are I think not what you see at the epilog. I think you are starting with a good mixture of both.
As I write this my wife is sewing with our 11 year old granddaughter, our $100,000 baby, born ten years after her parents got married, and after lots of fertility treatments. My daughter-in-law had plenty of time for the prenatal classes between the time she got out of school and the baby was due the middle of February, until the baby was born Christmas very early in the morning. It was the most unusual Christmas we have ever had, with an under 5 pound baby. I did not realize that there were baby clothes smaller than newborn. Same daughter-in-law had miscarriages and cancer.
I am writing a post-Hogwarts story, and well into the story, well past where I have posted, Hermione has a miscarriage. Here is a little section of the story.
James was wearing the jumper that Molly had knit for him for Christmas, and as she put James down Hermione noticed 3 small set of initials on the back, HJP JSP GMP. "What is this?" Hermione asked.
"I knit a new jumper for each child and grandchild each year" said Molly. "That is how I identify them, when they are tiny, parents and child's initials. Harry James Potter, James Sirius Potter, Ginevra Molly Potter. Sooner or later most of the jumpers are recycled, back from when we did not have any money and I could not afford new yard for everybody each year. I still like the idea that each jumper has some old yarn in it."
"I like saving some things" said Hermione. "I have a few things from my father we are going to save, so if I ever have any children" Hermione was beginning to tear up, then she started again "if we ever have children. I'm looking at this, and the photographs on the wall, and there isn't any evidence that I was ever pregnant."
Molly was slowly beginning to tear up, and she said "I never had a miscarriage, and none of the other daughter-in-laws had either. I did not realize how hard it could be." She took a small knitted piece out of her knitting bag, the back of an infant's jumper. On the back was RBW HRGW. She handed it to Hermione. "I was making it for your baby. I can't throw it out, Hermione. It's the only evidence I have of the grandchild we won't have. I look at it and feel so sorry for you and Ron and Jean." Molly turned to look at Jean Grainger, who was also beginning to tear up.
"You were making this for" Hermione looked at the back of the little jumper that would never be knitted. Molly nodded her head. Hermione just totally lost it, and broke down in tears into Molly's embrace. The two women embraced for a long time.
It's OK to use the emotion you feel in your writing. I am so sorry for you and your problems having a baby.Author's Response: Thank you. Report Review
Enjoying this story very much! Thanks so much for sharing. I'm very sorry to hear about your miscarriage - you will be in my thoughts.Author's Response: Thanks, I'm glad you enjoyed it and thank you. It's been rough, but I'm making it through. Report Review
These arenreally good! I was devastated when hp finished up, when do you think the next chapter will be up, no pressure, i know what it feels like to have a miscarriage! D:Author's Response: I'm not sure, maybe a few weeks. Report Review
My wife had all 4 of our children in the hospital. Well, the last one was almost born at home. It was a good thing she had an appointment with the OBGYN. He sent her right over there. Hard work, but I would expect witches would have potions for the pain, and would nurse their babies. The new nappies/diapers with velcro that my grandchildren have been in are much better than the ones with pins my wife and I had to use.Author's Response: Watch the movie The Business of Being Born. Opened my eyes.
I plan to homebirth if I ever get the chance. Report Review
I really liked how Harry and Ginny began exploring the different things they knew from how they grew up. It will be exciting to see where they go from here.Author's Response: me too... 2 years later and it's still not done. Meh Report Review
Thanks for this story it rox hope your pregnancy goes well , god bless hp !!Author's Response: Thank you. It didn't end up going well unfortunately Report Review
PLEASE UPDATE SON I AM REALLY ENJOYING THIS STORY!! i love the situation, it's different and not tooo out there.Author's Response: It's been 2 years since you left this review, but hey I'm finally getting to it! The story is complete and I'm getting it through the queue here as quickly as possible Report Review
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