Reading Reviews for We Build Then We Break
64 Reviews Found

Review #1, by MyLittleHeartShapedBox Living Death

15th June 2014:
This story is so interesting! You've left it on a cliffhanger of sorts, which has me eagerly awaiting the next chapter!

Author's Response: Thanks! Next chaps in the queue!

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Review #2, by emylee94 Eye of the Storm

16th November 2010:
i'm curious now..don't take too long to update this! :]

Author's Response: Er, sorry, afraid I did take quite a while... but thanks for reviewing!

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Review #3, by LittleMissRachel Eye of the Storm

17th August 2010:
I couldn't believe my eyes when I got back from my family vacation and saw this was updated! I am so, so, sooo happy that you were able to write and post a new chapter! ^__^

Despite the lack of Draco, I loved this chapter. Particularly the part where Hermione is meeting with Ginny and James. The last part of that scene had me reeling it was so amazing. I could hear, feel, and visualize the whole thing so clearly it was like a movie playing in front of me. And Hermione seems to be a bit touchy about people changing. ;) I wonder what (or, rather, who) could have had that effect on her.

As soon as I read the name "Newcomb" I had an AH-HA! moment, where I thought it might have been the same guy mentioned in the bank robbery, but then I felt stupid for thinking it and just figured it was a coincidence or something. I was surprised to read that I was actually right. XD

You are such a fantastic author! I really can't wait until you post the next chapter. I'm dying to know why Harry is meeting with Draco's lawyer! Now I'm going to end this lengthy, rambling review. :)

Author's Response: Thank you so much! Totally made my day :)

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Review #4, by Barette Far From the Madding Crowd

27th July 2010:
THanks for another great chapter! I know what you mean about some of the other Dramione stories being unrealistic too haha.. I must say the part about his girlfriend's abortion does show that he has remorse, but i wasn't really a fan of him even getting his girlfriend pregnant anyways.. Either way, the characterization of the characters is really good and the kiss was pretty realistic too!

Author's Response: Hm, yeah, I was a little iffy on that plot point, but I'm planning to do a little more with it later, so hopefully you'll like it :) Thanks for the review!

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Review #5, by Barette Damages

27th July 2010:
I really like your take on a post-Hogwarts Draco/Hermi relationship! I also really like you writing style and the way you characterized Hermione. Can't wait to read more, keep writing!

Author's Response: Thank you!

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Review #6, by Oneirik Eye of the Storm

21st July 2010:
yayayayayayay! YOU'RE BACK! And shoosh! This chapter is brilliant! I can not WAIT to see what happens next. Why yes, that is a hint to get the next chapter up asap! ;)

Author's Response: Thank you SOOO much for coming back to keep reading, it means so much to me! And I'll hopefully have more than one new chapter in the coming month :)

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Review #7, by malfoyfan Far From the Madding Crowd

21st July 2010:

Author's Response: I love your enthusiasm! Thanks for the review!

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Review #8, by dead_poet Eye of the Storm

21st July 2010:
first i have to say that i was always a great fan of your story and i jumped when i saw an update.

the chapter was very well written. you tried to picture the trial as real as possible. it worked well out (i had law during my first year at college ;D). i really appreciate the trial from the view of ginny. so i got to know her feelings during this hard time when her brother seems to loss the mental ability, when her boyfriend is lost and hermione seems so different to her.
you left a few questions. how could harry escape? how is hermione so "difficult"? this makes your story so interesting. you don't just rush into things. the past/present-presentation of the events is a very good tool to create the suspense. i'm very curious to get to know all the missing things.
i'm so glad that you portray a hermione who isn't just "happily after" after the death of voldemort. war and death causes impacts on everyone who saw it or even took part at it. i clearly understand hermione's rough and angry mood. i'm so interested in her development from the beginning of her case to the final trial of draco.
by the way, i really appreciate your chapter images. it's a good way to introduce your characters and the reader can get a glimpse of your imagination.

i really enjoyed reading this chapter and it left me every intrigued. i'm so happy that you actually found time to update this story. great job as ever.

love, christel

Author's Response: OMG. You totally just made my day by the mere fact that you returned to read this chapter that was so long coming. Thank you SO much. :)

Haha I remembered my third and fourth things to say in the AN which are 3) that the trial scene might be a bit sketch since I don't know anything about law and 4) you should be confused. Very confused. Answers pertaining to Ginny and Harry will be addressed in the next chapter.

Again, thank you so so so so so much for this review, it truly means a lot (and that you like the chapter images!). I will try to update as soon as I can, which will definitely be before the end of August. I'll hopefully get to post more than one chapter by then, but school is coming up and it will be even worse this year than last.

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Review #9, by purplestars4life Far From the Madding Crowd

30th June 2010:
ack! where did tht kiss come from?? one minute they're fighting, next they're kissing? thts crazy!! but i love it! this is, erm, slightly drawn out but its ok. this kiss made it all worthwhile! good work and update soon pls!

Author's Response: Yeah, I am taking it a bit slow... But I'm glad you like it and I definitely intend to finish this story!

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Review #10, by emylee94 Far From the Madding Crowd

22nd October 2009:
I love it..
It's really fun to read..
I'm looking forward to the next chapter..


Author's Response: Thanks! I'm glad you like it :)

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Review #11, by dramione4eva94 Far From the Madding Crowd

3rd October 2009:
One of my favorite chapters so far! I love this story! Please update soon!

Author's Response: Thank you! I'm sorry for the wait, I'll try to update soon!

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Review #12, by Janey994 Far From the Madding Crowd

29th September 2009:
Love it, love it, love it! The tension makes it so enthralling and I can't wait to hear what happens next! x

Author's Response: Thanks! I'm glad you love it, so do I!

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Review #13, by alannalove2009 Far From the Madding Crowd

24th September 2009:
i love this story. i like that it is actually plausible. i am used to some fluff but hopefully that will come later. i really hope that draco does not get convicted. i love him. its so sad about the abortion thing. but he told hermionie i love you and not to call herself a mudblood. i think he has change. i cant believe hermionie kissed him. isnt that like against the rules? lol. i hope things work out and stuff. please do not KILL anyone. those are the WORST dramionies!! but GREAT JOB! && good luck with school!! =]!!

Author's Response: While it is sort of against the rules (she could get fired!), but this IS a Dramione... ;) You know, I'm might add some fluff, we'll see. And I don't see any deaths in the near future. Thanks so much for the reviews, and I'll try to update soon! :)

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Review #14, by dead_poet Far From the Madding Crowd

23rd September 2009:
you are great. i'm totally honest. i love your descriptions, your characters, your images and metaphores (is this the plural form?).
you can be very proud of yourself because this isn't just another headgirl/headboy story. your story is well considered, interesting und so different from others.

this chapter showed the broken and confused hermione. she has a lot of trouble and she has problems to deal with it. you showed how human and actually "normal" she is although hermione is a war hero, a member of the elite and a very,very smart witch.

you also presented us a different draco. as you said, you wanted to emphasize his struggle after the war. he has doubts and anxieties about his future. i think that not only the ex-girlfriend thing(i'm not sure if it was necessary) pointed out that draco has deep emotional feelings also the fact that he goes to hermione to talk with her and apologize to her.

favourite sentence:
"Their mouths moved gently against each other in a cold melody of desolate feelings, their bodies arched away awkwardly to avoid contact."
i so loved the last scene. it's so hot!
two people who where just so desperate and lonely find solace in this moment of passion.
i like the fact that hermione was the one who kissed draco. brave girl!

i'm so excited about the next chapter. take all the time you need. school is very important! :)
i know that the next chapter will be worth a longer wait!

Author's Response: Thank you very much! :) About the ex-girlfriend thing: it's really not central to the plot, or even to his character. I'm trying to make it simply a small detail that isn't overplayed and yet isn't entirely overlooked. I thought about cutting it but part of me just sort of liked it.

Thank you again so much for the reviews, they mean so much! And I'm sorry for the wait, school has just been so demanding this year, and it will only get worse.

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Review #15, by LittleMissRachel Far From the Madding Crowd

23rd September 2009:
First of all, OMG YAY!!! I've been checking back daily for an update on this story, because it's one of my favorites ever! Secondly, your note at the end about Dramione stories is pretty much true. I guess we sometimes get carried away with wanting to write the good stuff? Lmao. It's still not acceptable, though, and I am SO glad you are not one of those author's. :)

Thirdly, OMG I LOVE DRACO! Haha. K, so I'm not going to get into politics about the whole abortion thing, because I don't want people to hate me, but it's good that he showed some sort of remorse about making her do it. I can't wait to find out more about it, because it only creates depth to his character and it's brilliant!

Fourthly, the last scene at the end? AMAZING X 57654839757483. Hermione has totally lost it, but OMG. HOT! Haha.

Okay this review is about as long as your chapter, so I'm going to stop writing, and say that this fic keeps getting better and better and I can't wait for you to update next

Author's Response: Thank you so much! Your review pretty much made my day. :) Hermione really has lost it, hasn't she? And that's part of what makes it so fun to write. Thanks for all your reviews, Rachel!

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Review #16, by dramione_girl82 A Muggle, a Witch, and a Nutter Walk Into a Bank

14th September 2009:
Wow! I am utterly impressed! Your attention to detail is amazing! This is going to be an amazing story and I can not wait until you update with the next chapters!! Keep up the amazing work!!

Author's Response: Again, thank you! I'm glad you like the little details, I really do put a lot of thought into them. Thanks for the encouragement and I hope you keep enjoying! :)

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Review #17, by dramione_girl82 Superiority Complex

14th September 2009:
This story has been amazing so far. I love all of the detail you have placed within it, and the structure you have used in your writting. I think that the way you have this chapter is perfect. It sets it up nicely for the story to go in just about any direction that you choose. I love how you have captured many small details from the original story and used them to the advantage of your story. I can not wait to see where this story is headed! I will definately continue reading :)

Author's Response: Why thank you! Those are some high compliments and they mean so much. I'm glad you like the story! :)

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Review #18, by GubraithianFire A Muggle, a Witch, and a Nutter Walk Into a Bank

13th September 2009:
OMG CHELSEA. Realistic, intense, heart-pounding, and - wait for it - sexy.

Well, okay, maybe that's not the right word. But I really, really liked this chapter. My favorite, hands down. As usual, your characterizations are flawless and stunning, and your plot is getting more complex. Excellently paced, good balance of description versus dialogue, et cetera. This whole fic - the idea and the execution - is very smart - not intellectual, per se, but well thought-out and just put together really well. But what's the best part? You're having fun, and the reader can tell. I really respect someone who can actually have fun writing something as deep and intense as this (usually you see "fun to write" associated with light romcoms and the sort), so yay for you, and for me, because it's always better when you can tell that an author is enjoying what h/she's doing.

I know you're still thinking, wtf does she mean by sexy? I meant the last scene. The whole "then tell me you love her" thing. It could potentially be so cliché (any Dramione runs the risk of that) but it's... not. Is it stunningly realistic? No. But it's believable, and there's a definite distinction between the two. This wouldn't happen in canon, but in fanon (indeed, in general) it makes all the sense in the world. And that's what I love about a good Dramione, which this so obviously is.

Two little things I have to point out to you, though. Firstly, you use the word "almighty" twice. As that word has godly connotations, I think, for this context, you're better off with simply "mighty." Secondly, you tend to say things in a dialogue tag and then repeat them in the next person's dialogue (ie: He would have got off work at six o'clock, but now it didn't look like that would happen./“Think you'll be finished by six?”), which is a teensy bit awkward. You've done that in at least one other chapter, so watch out for it - we don't need telling twice, you know what I mean? But yeah, nothing major, just things to look out for.

Smart and sexy and intense and all those other lovely superlatives I used somewhere in the prior paragraphs. =)

Author's Response: OMG GUBBY. Sexy? Really? That's one way to look at it, I suppose. :P In fact... I kinda like that.

Thank you SO much! Everything... wow. I don't even know how to respond - it means so much coming from you! I really truly am enjoying the process of writing this story and I'm glad that it shows. And I totally get what you mean about potential cliche... but that's what made it so much fun to write since I usually avoid cliches at all costs. :P So I guess you could say that I'm trying something I've never tried before.

Thank you for the pointers! I do tend to repeat things, and usually I find it well-placed and something even funny, but reading that back it did sound a little awkward, even though it was intentional.


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Review #19, by Ardeel A Muggle, a Witch, and a Nutter Walk Into a Bank

13th September 2009:
I love your story so far! Very nice! I hope the next chapter is up soon!

Author's Response: Thanks, Ardeel! Next chapter is in the queue!

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Review #20, by dramione4eva94 A Muggle, a Witch, and a Nutter Walk Into a Bank

13th September 2009:
This story is just so well-written! I love it! Please update soon! I can't wait!

Author's Response: Thank you very much! Next chapter is on the way!

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Review #21, by dead_poet A Muggle, a Witch, and a Nutter Walk Into a Bank

13th September 2009:
oh my god. amazing. amazing. absolute FANTASTIC!

you really showed the depth of draco's character and his struggle with the change of his mind, environment and of course his new job. you portrayed him so well!

best part of this gorgeous chapter:
“I know way more than you do. Seen way more. Experienced enough crime to last a lifetime,” he said in a deathly low voice, staring the Muggle bank robber right in the eye. “You've worked hard for this, haven't you? Think it will prove something? And then when you're finally faced with that moment that you've been longing for, you don't have the stones. You're weak. Powerless. Your feelings get in the way. You don't have what it takes to be a killer, and reality kicks in with a vengeance when you finally realize what you're doing, and you regret it all.”

great! this statement of draco was just so pure and true. it also shows how vulnerable he really is. very emotional!

and the scene with the 3 words&8 letters. i had to smile widely. he truely wanted to stop hermione's pain. this was also a very powerful moment in this chapter. (although that we all knew that draco did not meant it. at this moment ;D)

this chapter made my sunday. thank you :)

Author's Response: Wow, thank you! I really sort of feel a connection to the characters and I'm so glad that that come across. :)

So for the quote that you pointed out, it took a few tries to get it just perfect so that if you look back after reading the whole story you'll be like "So that's what he was talking about!"

The whole chapter was kind of emotional... I really had fun writing it because I could feel it so clearly. And the scene with the three words and eight letters... I smiled too. Very meaningful to the overall theme of the story, if I do say so myself.

You made my Sunday as well, dear. So you're welcome, and thank you. :)

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Review #22, by LittleMissRachel A Muggle, a Witch, and a Nutter Walk Into a Bank

13th September 2009:

This is the best chapter yet, hands down. Holy crap! Draco is just... amazing. Wow. I got all fangirly when he said he loved her, even though we all know he doesn't really love her. Haha.

And this part:

“You know nothing of pain,” he hissed. The robber's eyes widened in the split second it took for Draco to whip out his wand. “Crucio!”

My favorite part in this entire fic, and I have no idea why. Haha. I just know that it is. I guess it's because I can so clearly see it happening, and because the amount of emotion behind that statement is just so true.

I love your style of writing. The way you characterize everyone (especially Draco and Hermione) is such a breath of fresh air. Thank you for not having Draco go all mushy, because if there is one thing I don't really like about the Dramione community, it's that. When author's don't make Draco stay true to his character. And you do it wonderfully. :)

I'm so excited for this to continue!!!

Author's Response: I'm so glad you like Draco. I'll admit, I'm growing rather fond of that boy. That was a pretty intense scene... One of my favorites too, obviously. :) And I could really sort of feel it, too.

Thank you so much for the review! I've been trying SO hard to characterize them in a believable way and not fall into the cliche traps (which believe me, is NOT easy).

I'm so glad you like this story! Your review made me smile, so thank you again. :)

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Review #23, by alannalove2009 A Muggle, a Witch, and a Nutter Walk Into a Bank

13th September 2009:
OMG!!! Draco said that he loved her!!! wtf?!? i really hope she can cover for him!!! PLEASE HURRRY!!!

Author's Response: At this point it was merely to save her, but who knows if that will change... Oh wait, I know! =) Don't worry, already submitted the next chapter!

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Review #24, by Searchlight A Muggle, a Witch, and a Nutter Walk Into a Bank

13th September 2009:
Great chapter!! I find it weird that Hermione is trying to nail Malfoy being a member of the elite but she just covered for him. Hmm. I really love this story!! Can't wait to read the next one:)

Author's Response: It is a little weird, but Hermione has many conflicting emotions that could potentially get her into trouble... ;) Thanks for reviewing!

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Review #25, by LittleMissRachel Distractions

8th September 2009:

I adore this fic. :) I just read all of it in like an hour because I just didn't want to stop. I love how Hermione has changed so much because of Ron's insanity and Harry's disappearance. I also love how she gets all maniacal about seeking revenge and justice against the Death Eaters. It's awesome!

Draco is hawt. Haha. I feel like a loser saying that, but it's the truth. I love how you characterize him. The fact that he is anxious about being tried shows how human he is. So thanks for reminding all of us fangirls that he's not some hunky god to be drooled all over and actually has depth. It's a relief to read a fic about Draco where he actually has some depth to his character. :)

Please update soon! I can't wait to find out what happens next!

Author's Response: Thank you very much, LittleMissRachel! I've said it before, but I think that Draco has developed a persona through fan fiction that just isn't accurate, so I'm trying to shed some light on this complex character.

I'm also glad that Hermione's characterization isn't just... weird. :P I think that wars affect everyone in different ways, and that's where this story comes in! Thanks for the fantabulous review! :)

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