Please write more I absoultlty loved it I think it would be interesting for Harry to go dark and voldemort is going to get his but kicked but anyways Go Harry! Report Review
interesting :) after a long wait i really enjoyed this chapter. I can see a development in the relationship between Draco and Harry and i can't wait to see what Voldemort's plan in with Harry :D
[=Miss Ginny Potter=] Report Review
ohhh!! i want the next chapter soon!!! Report Review
I'm not sure what to make of this chapter, things seem strange now. My main question now is why is Harry suddenly eager to try Quidditch? He has no reason to believe that he can fly now any more than before. Report Review
Great stuff. I always look forward to your updates.
I'm a bit confused though: why hasn't Voldemort used the necklace to recall Harry to him? I thought the whole point was to be able to snatch Harry up anytime, anyplace?
Oh just something I noticed. When you use the word "minutes" I think sometimes you mean "moments." Staring at someone for "minutes" is a really long time. When in doubt, picture yourself doing what your character is doing, or act it out. Makes it much more realistic and believable.
Until next time...Author's Response: Thank you for the constructive idea. I try, but sometimes, some things just come out a little weird.
You'll see the whole necklace deal here soon. Report Review
Real life takes precedence over all of this. I never post a story until it is all written as I am a sporadic writer myself. Good luck in college.
The story coming out about the spell on him was interesting. I was a little disappointed in Harry going too far with the fact that Voldemort had tried to recruit his father. On the other hand, he was perceptive to realize who had passed on the prophecy to Voldemort.
Ending the chapter with a cliffhanger and then taking a long time to update is rather cruel you know. ;-)Author's Response: I can definitely see the advantage of writing the whole thing out first. Thanks for the luck!
Thanks for the honest opinion on how Harry's acting. I'm trying to get the characterization down and you telling me that is helpful. And I really like the idea of Snape screwing up every once in a while.
I'm sorry! I just got caught up in life. lol. I promise, I'll try not to let it happen again. Granted, I might end up eating my words.
Thank you again for, as always, being a loyal reader and reviewer. Report Review
Very interesting spell.Author's Response: Thanks for the opinion and the review. Report Review
:D loved it as per usual, i especially like the spell you have on Harry :) nice twist :D
[=Miss Ginny Potter=]Author's Response: Thank you for reviewing! I'm going to see how I can work with this spell. It'll be interesting (hopefully). Report Review
Wow! gr8 chap!!!
I am glad Harry could return. I felt bad about his wounds though... And now I'm dying to read further. Update soon^_^
Keep writing... :)Author's Response: I'll update as soon as I can finish the chapter! Report Review
It's hard for me to settle on what Voldemort is up to when he isn't very consistent. He lets time pass with little accomplished and once Harry proves that he is actually making progress (albeit mostly on his own) he starts putting on the pressure by basically kidnapping him. He seems to want Harry to turn to him but he is going about it in a very poor manner.
Voldemort is prone to overly-elaborate plans (at least in canon) but he usually has a consistency of purpose and I'm having trouble seeing it here. He's either not doing very well at all or his purpose is too obscure for me to discern. He's also losing his cool because if Harry's life was really at stake (and it certainly seems that it was) he took a risk that he really didn't need to take. Maybe his whole plan was just to keep him until he broke? Not much of a plan...
I guess the important thing is that I'm still enjoying the "ride". I'm looking forward to the next chapter.
his windows were pilled with snow
his windows were piled with snow
had realized months ago, of where this place was
had realized months ago, where this place was
The Dark Lord is not please, Harry Potter
The Dark Lord is not pleased, Harry PotterAuthor's Response: I'm sorry if it seems to be a bit confusing. You do make a good point as far as him making a consistant stance. Voldemort at this point is seeming pretty eratic, isn't he? Meanwhile, Dumbledore is keeping his cool in the background.Trust me. It won't stay that way. Think of it this way: if you're slightly confused, that means Harry is slightly confused.
By the way, I look forward to your reviews a lot! You give a lot of insight to how the story is looking and I greatly appreciate it. And because of you, I will learn how to use proper grammer. lol. Thank you for the insight! Report Review
:O i loved it :) i like how you've ended it as well, go Dumbledore! haha :) i like how you've got it all and i can't wait to see how it all unfolds :D update soon :)
[=Miss Ginny Potter=]Author's Response: lol. Yes, I like the idea of Dumbledore not taking anything from anyone. I mean, when you're that old, you just don't put up with stuff. I'm kind of modeling him after my grandpa.
As far as an update, I've got a lot coming in this next month before I head up to school, so the updates won't be as frequent for a while, but I will give an honest effort! After all, I have nothing better to do. lol Report Review
I am dying to read further...
Actually I have an idea for your story, if you'll like. Why doesn't Harry just remove his memory, or lock it, and keep it safe in a goblet, with Dumbledore? (The memory of the prophecy).Then he won't need to be afraid of his memory being seen by Voldemort.
Anyways, I liked the story very much. The theme and idea is really very nice. Update soon^_^
You'll get a 10/10 from me!!!
Keep writing... :)Author's Response: Thank you leaving a review! And I am always open to ideas on what should happen! I love them; you never know what inspiration you may get.
I have the next few chapters already planned out and partly written depending on the chapter. However, I'm going to keep you suggestion at the back of my head and see if I can use it later.
As far as the next chapter goes, it's already written and I'm going to read through it a couple more times before I submit it.
Thanks again! Report Review
Somewhere along the way, it seems to me that Voldemort has violated the agreement. He doesn't seem to be actively training for a while now and then makes a strange claim to justify keeping him over the agreed period. If he had to reduce Harry's power, fine - he accomplished that while Harry was fighting him - both to prevent Voldemort's taking it and then in defending himself at the end. There should have been some consequence in the agreement for that. Also, Harry has obviously made progress this week - he has learned more about his power and is using new facets of it.
A civil Malfoy - that's almost creepy. The article in the paper was well done.
Well, I think I this might clear up why
Well, I think this might clear up why
so that we could see what life was for the founders
so that we could see what life was like for the founders
I would need to steep so low
I would need to stoop so lowAuthor's Response: I love how you are following along so well with the story. Are you seeing what Voldemort is trying to do yet? By all means, you have a valid point: Voldemort has broken the agreement; but he has done something else that will come into play shortly. Report Review
i loved it yet again :) as for the stories on Fanfiction i've read them before, many of times, and i loved them and while i can see similarities between your stories and the stories on there you've made the similarities your own :) can't wait for the next chapter :)
[=Miss Ginny Potter=]Author's Response: She was just a great inspiration. lol.
As for the next chapter, I'm going to get to writing it straight away.
Thank you for the constant reviews! Report Review
Don't worry about the kind of mistakes I am pointing out. Despite all of the help JKR had, her books had typos and mistakes too. I'm just pointing them out in case you want to fix them, that's all. Oh, and I don't recommend taking it out on the computer. It may feel good for a moment but then. . . .
We caught a glimpse of the canon Voldemort there. If Lucius and Severus hadn't interrupted it could have been quite the tantrum. He doesn't give up though and I could see how his probing could wear Harry out.
My favorite part is, of course, the conversation with Ginny. It was good to see how she can get him straightened out without resorting to the bat bogey hex. Her temper can be intimidating enough without the hex. I'm looking forward to the next chapter and it sounds like I won't have to wait long.
the lives you’ve save
the lives you’ve saved
Each man did not allow their fear to show as they watch Voldemort pace
Neither man allowed his fear to show as they watched Voldemort pace
(with 'each' you should use 'his' but I thought it sounded better with 'neither' - just my opinion)
Did you observe in changes
Did you observe any changesAuthor's Response: I appreciate you pointing out the mistakes. And the computer won't be my unwilling victim because I rely on it so much; not to mention the entire story is on it.
I like to show that Voldemort still has his darker side where he can lose control. After all, everyone needs to scream now and then.
And Ginny will start to play a larger role from now on. Report Review
wow i absolutely love this story :) many people try do AUs like this one but they use overdramatics and don't hold their plots but you have and its awsome. I can't wait for the next chapter :) i like the whole thing between Voldemort and Harry especially with the fact that Voldemort is trying to manipulate Harry and Harry is triumphing without even realising. You're an amazing writer :)
[=Miss Ginny Potter=]Author's Response: Thank you so much for the compliments! If you like this story so much, then there is a great set of stories at fanfiction dot net that has the same kind of idea going on. Definitely my inspiration! It's by krystalrose. Check it out!
Next chapter is in the queue! Report Review
There is so much on HPFF that I must quickly choose which stories to follow and which to ignore. It appears I made a mistake by putting this into the latter category. I am intrigued by your characterization of Voldemort. He's still manipulative and tends toward being overly dramatic but he seems more controlled than I pictured him. In canon, I saw him as not responding well to opposition or surprises. Your Voldemort is better able to keep his cool - which seems to make him more dangerous in my opinion. I am a bit puzzled by Godric's portrait not being more helpful - perhaps because it is just a portrait?
I like how you are bringing things to Harry's reluctance to confide in others and his inability to handle his own guilt and negative thoughts. It appears that both Harry and Voldemort are missing who his obvious confidant is: Ginny. Who else would know as much about guilt and being manipulated by Voldemort? Since this is a H/G pairing and Ginny has been only a bit player so far, it is time for her to become more involved in the story. Right?
he saw the lighting coming for him.
he saw the light coming for him.
he saw the light of the spell coming for him.
from you duel last night
from your duel last night
Harry was very much a wreak on the inside
Harry was very much a wreck on the inside
I would appreciated you not bringing down the manor
I would appreciate you not bringing down the manor
Severus’ quarter hold the only flew connection
Severus’ quarters hold the only floo connectionAuthor's Response: Thank you for the indepth review!
That's the kind of characterization I really like. Yeah, in the books Voldemort is, at least I feel, far less controlled. But I always felt he would be more like Dumbledore (ironically enough) in that he has tremendous self-control. Likewise, I think it's more human of Harry to be feeling so much guilt and not wanting to tell others about it.
You'll be seeing Ginny here soon. Don't worry.
And thanks for pointing out my now obvious faults. It appears I'm going to have to edit more than I do. Report Review
Thanks for updating! It was worth the wait, as this chapter was really exciting! Can't wait for the next one :)Author's Response: Thanks. Thankfully, I have already started writing the next chapter, so hopefully I'll have it up sooner. Report Review
I read your story 3 times:p
UPDATE SOONAuthor's Response: Thanks for the enthusiam. The next chapter is almost done and typed so I will be putting it up soon. Report Review
i love this story plz update plz update plz update 10/10Author's Response: Thank you for the review! I'm sorry to say I haven't started the next chapter as of yet, but I will be able to soon. As soon as it's done, you will have the next chapter. Happy New Year! Report Review
Thank-you for updating! This chapter was brilliant - I can't wait for the next one! Your writing is full of excitement, and really enjoyable to read. Keep it up!!!Author's Response: Thank you so much for leaving a review. I doubt the next chapter will be up before the staff leaves for the holidays, but you'll have a chapter for the new year. Report Review
Awesome chapter! From what I'm guessing, Ginny is going start to get suspcious and find out the truth! Can't wait for more! Update soon please!Author's Response: Thank you for the review. I'm going to write some this weekend. I'm just a little stuck at the moment. But I know what I want to do, so you'll have a chapter by the end of the weekend. Report Review
wow! This is a really great story! Keep the chapters coming.Author's Response: Thank you!! Report Review
Nice and please update as this story is good.Author's Response: Thanks. I'll try to update soon (the queue is practically empty) but I'm at a little block. I'll get through it though. See you soon! Report Review
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