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7 Reviews Found

Review #1, by seamussusan09 Falling

27th January 2010:
I have not been on HPFF in ages..
I love this story so beautiful
I love Padma and Terry together so sweet
I love the idea of their first date so cute

Author's Response: ha, thank you so much for the amazingly positive feedback. this story was sort of a spur of the moments thing so i had mixed opinions about it but i am glad to see that you enjoyed it a lot. (:

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Review #2, by rachm34 Falling

14th August 2009:
shhh, I haven't reviewed the four people yet in my slots. Shhh! Pretend that right now, I am sneaking. Pretend that right now I am stealthy and no one can find out who I reviewed first. Tehehe. Pretend that I am just not here. Actually no, I am here. Just don't tell anyone! *tiptoes* Picture me, dressed in all black (kidding) and sneaking down to review from my bedside where I have resided for the past two days after me getting my wisdom teeth pulled out. That sucks, let me tell you. Don't ever have teeth pulled, especially your wisdom teeth. It's painful as hell.

Anyway.

HOW THE HELL ARE YOU ABLE TO DO THAT? first off. That has been on my mind reading this whole story.

How the heck are you able to take two basically unknown characters and make the readers feel as if they know them? How are you so magnificent at doing that? Wow, you really really make them your own characters. You make them whole, they are shaped and real people. How are you able to do that?

and your descriptions?!?!?!!, girl! They are so good. I don't even know how you are able to write. You really are above most of the fan fiction writers. You are able to think of such great oneshots to write (this is one, right? haha I forgot to check)

and the plot you add to them is amazing. This was so good. I loved the opening of this, and the descriptions and I love how you described their friendship. It was like I was there.

great job! :)

Author's Response: thanks! ha! your secret- as always- is safe with me! wow...thanks so much for so many ah-mazing compliments. i am truly in awe right now. i am still very young and i have a lot of improvements that have to be made so being told that you think that i am above most fan fic writers is simply unbelievable. AH! thank you, thank you, thank you beyond anything and everything in the world!!

oh, and by the way; i had six teeth pulled like three years ago or so when i was like ten or eleven and so i know right where you are at! get better! please do because pretty soon i am going to pop into your thread with another one-shot of mine that i posted a few days ago!


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Review #3, by Blissbug Falling

13th August 2009:
Hi there, it's SugarHeart from the forums, here for your review.

I like the premise for this story, it's very sweet and the actual location for where everything happens seems to be original enough to hold my attention.

My one main problem is this: after she falls, and Terry follows, where do they land? Is it on another window sill, or an outcropping of stone? Are they on some sort of neatly placed but mostly unseen platform? Because you never say directly, and the whole action sequence of her falling, and then Terry following is a bit unclear to begin with, I find myself really confused and so not able to better focus on the story.

What I do like though is how you bring in phyiscal details of the body to heighten the emotional space of the scene. Fast breathing, eyes closing, face flushing ectra... These little details do a lot to really pull me into the scene and I love that.

I have to be honest, I found Terry's dialogue a bit too fem for a boy his age, but that's often a problem when you're a girl writing a guy or the other way around. I would just remind you to keep your dialogue real-world. While lines like "You mean the world to me, Padma; and the sky," are very lovely (I have a happy sigh reading that) they don't always ring true. I don't know if a guy would be so entirely...gushing. It's more a chic thing, so for me it just didn't seem exactly plausible.

Over all not a bad read though, I enjoyed it.

6/10

BB

Author's Response: makes perfect since. thanks so much for the amazingly helpful review. your advice was very accurate and understandable and i am very pleased that you offered some my way. thanks so much.

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Review #4, by Insanity Falling

4th August 2009:
Hello, this is Insanity from the forum. I am here to review. However, before I get started I would like to let you know that my reviews are to the point and not many people get past a 5 or 6, rarely does anyone get a 10.

Beginning: You’re beginning was very good, a lot of description and it drew the reader in. However, I think that you needed to describe Padma a little better, what she looked like, what were her character traits? I liked the description but toward the end, of the third paragraph, I began to feel like there was little too much description.

Characters: I think that you did a great job with the characters; they were interesting, and well written. I think that you did good with the background information, but I think that there could have been more to it with maybe mentioning a few more things they had done together. You made the readers fall in love with Teddy with his sweetness.

I thought that the way they got together was little corny, and cliché.

Spelling and Grammar: I could not find any mistakes as far as spelling and grammar go.

Overall: I think that over all with a few corrections and additions this could be great story. It is a 6/10

Author's Response: thank you very much. i really appreciate the pointers that you gave me. i will work on things.

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Review #5, by Jazzeh Turnip Falling

27th July 2009:
I read the first paragraph and then though "NO. Stop reading this in your head and read it out loud, NOW." So I did.

And it made it AMAZING.

I loved this sentence: "His voice carried the fluttering essence of a gentle wind." That one sentence is more poetic and beautiful than any of the poems I had to study last year for school. I loved it and wanted to hug it. Not that it's possible to hug a sentence xD.

When Padma fell from the window I nearly made a grab for my tissues, but then when Terry followed suit I couldn't help but laugh. It's an odd situation, but considering they're at Hogwarts, ANY situation is possible.

I don't know what it is that made me do it but when Padma came out with “Terry…you don’t like me, do you?”, it really made me grin and laugh. I just had this amazing image of two people laying on a roof having fallen from a window confessing their love for each other, and I just couldn't hold it in. So I must mention how I love your imagery.

I can't help but think that I've read some of your stories before, but I just looked on your authors page and nothing seems familiar, but it has made me want to read more of your work, and I will. Well done on such a well written fic.

10/10 and I'm favouriting this. It's a perfect balance of romance and drama, and for a moment, I really did think Padma as done for. I like surprises :)

Author's Response: thank you so much for one of the most amazing reviews that i have ever received. this really made my day. thanks you sosososo much!

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Review #6, by bigpotterfan Falling

23rd July 2009:
Ahhh, so cute, they seem like such a cute couple. I liked it very much!!! Would you ever consider writing more about them, they are so cute together and the couple aren't written about much if at all? If not, great one shot!

Author's Response: i guess i could write more about the two of them; i never really thought much about it before. we will just have to see! anyways, thanks so much for the review and the challenge. i had a fun time arranging a plot for the two of them and the experience was very helpful to my writing. thank you!

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Review #7, by Harry and Ginny Falling

22nd July 2009:
aww this fic is cute and they are an interesting pairing.^_^

10/10

Harry and Ginny

Author's Response: thank you so much for the lovely review! i really appreciate it.

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