This was an AMAZING story. Hope you can makE another one like it. I know this was probably made a while ago but i'm new and let me just say this is a really good story. But poor Ginny ): Report Review
Some parts didn't flow very well but overall it was really good.Author's Response: Yeah, this story has been played around with a lot. I wrote it a long time ago and when I look back at it, I sorta cringe sometimes. Thanks for reviewing though :D Report Review
Oh my gosh...I'm crying. Seriously, only a few stories on the site have made me cry and this is definetly one of them. You did an amazing job :)Author's Response: Awww, thanks :). I'm glad you liked it. I have a hard time making tear-jerking stories, so I'm glad that you thought it was a success. I plan to make a lot more of them since I enjoy a really good emotional story once and a while. :). Report Review
Hey There, This is ElysiumJayne from the forums with the review you requested back in September- I'm sorry that it took this long to get to you but I'm here now. Now onto the review!
I found your first paragraph drew me in quickly, though I could tell from your request and the banner who you were talking about- I found myself unable to look away from the webpage in front of me. I thought you displayed Ginny's emotions wonderfully, I could feel what she was going through, the only suggestion I have is to maybe add some italics into a couple of words to give them more emphasis.
With the flashback, I would also put that in italics so that it stands out from the rest of the story and then maybe change the lyrics into bold- it is all up to you really but that is my opinion. There are a few spelling and grammar mistakes here and there, so I would suggest getting a one-shot beta to fix them up for you.
I loved how you wrote Harry's death- you wanted to know if this story was a tearjerker, and in the moment- it definitely was. The parts with Ron, Hermione and Ginny were also very tear worthy- I felt so sorry for poor Ginny in those scenes. And the ending, I literally have tears running down my face right now.
On that note, I hope this review helped and I'll see you soon when I fill your second request. Thanks for requesting!
x ElyAuthor's Response: Thank you so much for this lovely review. I'm glad that you found it enjoyable and that it was emotional. It's intended to be emotional.
Ugh, I'm such a lazy editor. Maybe I really should consider getting a beta from now on. XD.
I wrote this story three years ago, and I've gone back and edited it so that it flowed better. It was sort of bad before XD.
Your review helped. Thanks alot and I can't wait to get another one from you! :) Report Review
I'm speechless. That was so good. Song-fics are overdone and I find it frustrating when people use the lyrics of a song to tell a story but you did it so perfectly. You didn't rely on the song merely used the lyrics to capture Ginny's emotions and simplify them. The song helped the reader truly understand Ginny and added rather than detracted from the story.
I really liked the way you managed to give the reader all the background information they needed, such as how Harry died and what happened to Voldemort, without detracting to the story. You didn't give a long monologue of what happened but rather relayed the information coloured by Ginny's emotions and made it fit perfectly with the story you were attempting to tell.
Grief is very hard to portray. It is an emotion that I struggle to write as it is very hard to keep in character and still have the reader experience their pain. I am impressed with how well you have portrayed Ginny's grief. It is completely believable and it is not hard to understand why she is in so much pain. Her unbearable grief is so easy to empathise with and you had me almost in tears.
All the characters were completely in character. Ron's way of dealing with her grief is perfect as is Hermione’s and Mrs Weasley's. I liked the fact that you showed the effect of Ginny's grief on the rest of the family as it showed that she was not the centre of the world but rather a catalyst for her world falling apart. It was a nice way of keeping everything believable as she slowly lost herself to grief.
The ending. I love happy endings so much. Yours was so perfect. You twisted the song to fit her and made it your own. As far as I can tell the song didn't have a happy ending yet your story does and I find that wonderful. Having his child is a perfect way to complete a circle and close the story. I also liked the fact that Ginny wondered herself why she was so angry and the child settled any OOCness of Ginny as the reader realises that pregnant equals hormones which equals unpredictable behaviour.
The sentence where Harry says that he will always look down on Ginny even if he does die fits really nicely with the realisation in St Mungos that he was laughing with her from above.
I simply loved this story, it's now one of my favourites :DAuthor's Response: Thank you so much!!! Grief is really hard to write without making it sound overly done. I was a bit worried about this one since I wrote it a while ago with some edits along the way. I'm glad that you like it and that it's one of your favorites :). Again, thanks for the lovely review. It made my day Report Review
Aw I really liked it! For some peculiar reason it reminds me of how Prison Break ended... anyway, it was really sweet and depressing at the same time! Oh, and I love Within Temptation! Good job!
LanaAuthor's Response: Thank you! I'm glad you liked it!
I love Within Temptation with a passion XD. Report Review
i acctually cried, i actually cried when reading this story its so well written!Author's Response: Thanks :D.
im glad that it manages to get that reaction...but I'm sorry you cried Report Review
not many of these fan made stories make me actually gasp or cry but this one did. you used amazingly powerful language and the storyline was...wow. defiantly should have been like this in the real book :)Author's Response: Thank you so much for the lovely review. I'm glad that you liked it :D.
made me cry... hysterically. but that's a good thing, you know... i'm not a big crier.Author's Response: That's what I was aiming for. Thank you for reading it. :) Report Review
that was...wow. amazing. you have some serious talent. I'm actually at a loss for words. the emotions were so powerful and real and...I really don't know what to say except that you did an incredible job on this.Author's Response: Thank you. I'm glad that you enjoyed it. :) Report Review
I cried when I read this story.
My mum wanted to know what was wrong and I said I just read a SPECTACULAR story. She read it after me and she said it was FANTASTIC and it is just so so sad.
THIS SHOULD BE A MOVIE!!! Bye Lucie xAuthor's Response: Thank you so much. I'm glad you enjoyed the story. The story was supposed to get that response and I'm pleased that it did.
Love, Everlasting Faerie Light Report Review
Beautiful! This is a fantastic one-shot! Very powerful. You write emotions very well. Thanks for a great read!Author's Response: Thank you. I'm glad that you enjoyed it. Report Review
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