Reading Reviews for Breathing Freedom
  
8 Reviews Found

Review #1, by writergirl8 One

28th August 2009:
Yay! Go, Astoria! Great one-shot. I don't usually read Draco/Astoria, but I just read your Ron/Hermione one shot and it was so good I had to read some of your other stories! Great job, and I loved the name of this! ~writergirl8

Author's Response: Haha, I think the name is one of my favorite things about this as well. XD I had never written Astoria before, so I thought I might as well give it a shot. Thanks so much for the wonderful review!

 Report Review

Review #2, by JLHufflepuff One

1st August 2009:
I love the way you capture her unsure emotions in this. I truly feel for her and her situation, and I think everything is realistic. I like the way you added in the touch of her father allowing her to "escape." I think it shows how much he cares about her and possibly empathizes with the plight of the expectation to marry for prestige, etc...

Author's Response: Thank you so much! That means a lot coming from an author such as yourself. I'm really glad you enjoyed it. The father part was a little iffy with me, and I had a couple versions where I edited him out, but I'm glad you think he was a good addition. Thanks again!

 Report Review

Review #3, by Phoenix_Flames One

1st July 2009:
Aw. Rin! This was so great. Heart warming and enlightening and sad all the same.

The writing was beautiful as well. I was truly captivated in, not only the plot, but in your style and diction as well. The ending was unexpected, although I can see this in Astoria's characterization excellently. Her love for Draco and his love for her always seem to be an interesting match. It is always intriguing to see different people write their relationship differently, and I can see this being spot on. Running out the first time, but we know she has to end up with him eventually.

Truthfully, I'm glad you had her run out on her wedding day. It was unique and its own story. Beautiful. Rin, this was amazing and so pretty!

Excellent job, dear! *hugs*

10/10

Author's Response: Aw, Druuuee, thank you so much! I\\\'m flattered! I wrote this on a plane ride, and generally when I write things on paper they don\\\'t turn out as good as I hope because it\\\'s hard to edit them. So I\\\'m really pleased you liked it! Gah... I\\\'m running out of things to say now because I\\\'m so touched! Thank you so much! It really means a lot to me. :)
- Rin


 Report Review

Review #4, by HogwartsGirl618 One

30th June 2009:
Hey! I am here not as requested but because I am stalking your author page =) Hope you are having a lovely day! If this sounds really formal, it is because I cannot use contraptions without the apostrophes becoming slashes, haha.

This is absolutely fantastic writing. Jaw-droppingly awesome. Your flow is amazing- it really seems effortless. Well, obviously you put in a lot of effort to make it effortless =) Your style is breathtaking- your imagery is fantastic. The reader really flows from the beginning to the end. Astoria has flawless characterization- how she describes herself as awkward- and at the end how she runs. It really is a believable transition; the reader can visualize the entire thing. The scene with her father made me smile, by the way =)

There was only one typo I caught:The ribbons and bows mounted on my shoulders did not help the site - it should be sight. But I am the queen of typos (my beta puts in loads of work =) so please do not think I am attacking you. ;-)

Lovely. Lovely! I will favorite this, definitely! =D Great Job!

Author's Response: Oh goodness, thank you so much! I know you like Draco/Astoria so I wasn\\\'t sure if I should recommend this because they don\\\'t end up together! Haha. :) But I\\\'m really pleased you enjoyed it! Ah, somebody pointed out that typo before and I forgot to change it. :/ Thanks so much for reminding me to fix that! I\\\'ll get to it right away.

Thank you so, so much. you\\\'ve made my day! XD I really appreciate it.
- Rin


 Report Review

Review #5, by WeasleyTwins One

24th June 2009:
Hello RIN! -tackle-

I'm going to quit, just absolutely quit. You get better and better every single one-shot that you post. Your talent just makes me want to throw my hands in the air in defeat. It is...I...snap. Progression happens over time, but man, it's like you've jumped from fanfiction writer to...one of the best on the site. No joke. I would put you up against the veterans of this site, that's how good you are. Rinni, you are seriously going to have to write something that I can criticize. I only saw a few grammatical errors, but other than that, it was beautiful.

Once again, you have proven your abilities by writing something with the depth of...hmm, well, deeper than the deepest hole :] The choice of Astoria as the MC was great; it really added a little spice to the piece.

As usual, I am repeating myself because you get better and better and you never disappoint - I cannot find new ways of complimenting you, so I resort to repetition.

Love it, 10/10

-hugtackle-

Shelby

Author's Response: Aw, Twinsy, thank you so much! I'm so pleased. Bah, I can't even think of a good response to all of this! Uh. Gosh, I love you so much. SO MUCH. That's pretty much all I can say. And... thank you! Thank you so much. Maybe you could PM me those grammar mistakes over at TGS? I'd love to sort those out.

Again, thanks so much. I can't even come up with as good of a response as your review.
- Rin


 Report Review

Review #6, by WriterPlatinum One

20th June 2009:
Very good!

I must say, that's one of the best stories I've read so far. I'm not so sure what so say, so this review will be quick and simple.

Overall, it's great, and I didn't spot any errors. Great job!

Author's Response: Wow, what a compliment! Thank you so much. You have no idea how much that means to me. I mean. thank you! I really appreciate it, and I'm glad you enjoyed it.

 Report Review

Review #7, by An Reader full of Gratitude One

19th June 2009:
HI!
I read your story...the plot was perfect, beautiful so artistic!

XD In short, your story was fabulous to read! I loved it!

:D Great job, 100/10, please keep writing! :)


Thank you for this gorgeous story,

Freedom is so often taken for granted,

From light_blue

Author's Response: Oh wow, thank you so much! I really appreciate all of your kind words. Thanks so, so much for the review. :) I'm really glad you enjoyed it!

 Report Review

Review #8, by RonsGirlFriday One

19th June 2009:
This is really powerful, and I liked that you used a high-class pureblood character, who supposedly has everything she could ever need to be comfortable and happy.

There's a lot of great imagery here. One of my favorite parts was when Astoria felt like an ugly duckling among swans when her bridesmaids were around here -- it was visual and ironic, because the bride is supposed to be the most beautiful, or at least feel the most beautiful -- so I liked how you turned that assumption on its head.

"And that's when the answer hit me, like a train hitting a helpless cow sitting innocently on the tracks"

^That was one of the lines that stood out to me the most, because it was a pretty morbid thought, but it was all the more powerful because of that fact. It added the kind of gravity that made her dilemma into something more than just normal pre-wedding jitters.

Does she refer to Draco as "Malfoy" just because he's so distant and cold? I was just a bit confused when she referred to him that way, but if that's the case, I think it would make sense. He's not really anything to her except a last name anyway -- a family she was supposed to marry into.

I really enjoyed this...it was melancholy, but I liked the ending. I think you really made Astoria into a sympathetic character. Well done!

Author's Response: Wow, thank you so much! I really appreciate it. I guess she refers to Draco as Malfoy just because he feels so distant to her. But you're right, maybe that is a bit odd. I'll definitely go back and take a look at that part!

I'm really glad you enjoyed it. I wrote this on a really long plane ride, and I didn't know how well it would be received. But this review cheered me right up! Thanks so much, again, for all of your feedback.


 Report Review
If this is your story and you wish to respond to reviews, please login