Hi! I decided to review some of your fics at the moment as I had some spare time and this one pulled me in the second I started reading the summary.
I've never read a fic based on Voldemort at school before but I really like it and the originality of it.
You seem to be really good at making your characters voice strong and the centre of the story.
I like the bond between Myrtle and Tom it seems like something that would happen. I just love this story I may add it too my favorites :)
Anyway I am going to check out some more of your stories :)
Ginny45 xxxAuthor's Response: Thank you! This was a little one-shot I pulled out of the air... it was kind of odd, I thought, to put Voldemort at school, but also a pivotal point in his life. Thank you! Characterization is something I take great pride in.
Thanks again! ^-^ Report Review
Bonjour, Madame TwilightPrincess!
...Right, well, that's pretty much all the French I know, so I'll be switching to English now, if you don't mind. Although, if you do mind, I'll me happy to make up words that I think sound Frenchish.
Anyway, oh man, I did enjoy your one-shot!
And the ending, well, wow. So, Mister Voldemort is a big arse because of a girl! Ah, the classic story, boy meets girl, boy is infatuated, girl doesn't like him back, boy wants revenge. Although, I guess, in this case, he gets revenge by becoming a mass murderer.
Because I never imagined Tom to be an outcast... or in love... or nice... or friendlyish, he didn't sit too well with me. I guess that whole, horribly mean vicious killing Lord Voldemort phase just banished all notions that he could ever be a decent human being for me.
One paragraph that really stood out to me:
"Sixteen years of age or not, I know my emotions better than any legal adult can tell me. I know that whenever I see her, nothing else matters; neither the sun nor the stars. I know that when she looks my way, even if not intentionally, a shred of hope is planted in my heart. One shred that grows and blossoms with each gentle word, kind gesture. Never mind that they weren’t meant for me. That which escapes the mouth of an angel echoes throughout for all to hear."
I really thought this showed that Tom was actually confident, as stated. He knows that when it comes to his emotions, the girl, he actually does know better than anyone else. The adults are all idiots, when it comes to his emotions. He realizes that he is in charge of his own self, and doesn't need to listen to other people. He is certain of what he knows, and won't let anyone tell him otherwise.
All in all, I did enjoy this. I haven't read the previous version, so I cannot compare them, but for what it's worth, this was great.Author's Response: Hola! XD Sorry, I'm not a French-speaker. I'm a Spanish-speaker =P
Thank you! I'm so glad you liked it. I really wanted to take a look at what someone like Tom Riddle could have been going through. It was hard for me to imagine that he was just born evil and he went right into being evil and there's no human aspect of him, you know? I'm really glad you liked that ^_^
That paragraph is one of my favorites, to tell you the truth =P Thanks for pointing that out =)
Thank you so much! I really appreciate your review ^_^ Report Review
Ah I haven't posted here in a while, but I do recall the orginal version of this fic, and while I find the whole premise of this story fascinating, I must say what I recall from the orginal I liked it better. I recall it had a sort of ambiance around it that this lacks.
I'm not exactly sure where you stand on OOCness, whether you tend to stay on the beaten path or whether the characters simply act as a frame work for you to work with, but Tom Riddle rubbed me the wrong way.
His essential characteristic of looking deep into the mysteries of things, whether it be people or places, seem to be quashed. For instance this passage:
She’s ahead of them, too. I know this because in all my years of Hogwarts education, I’ve heard nothing but good things about Giselle Marx. The professors say she’s brilliant, the girls say she’s a reliable friend, and the boys say she is wonderful. How can I disagree? It doesn’t hurt matters that she’s absolutely gorgeous, either.
I find it really hard to believe that Tom would accept anyones opinion, especially the opinion of people who dislike him, without first doing his own sort of investigation. He also doesn't seem like the type who would try to run away from his problems, having a tendency to seek revenge more than anything else.
But then again the point of this chapter may have been to show his disillusionment with love more than anything else...but I'll stop typing now lol
Best of luck!Author's Response: Welcome back! Thanks for reviewing. I'm sorry you didn't like this one as much as the original, but I didn't like the ending of the original. Other than that, I didn't change much.
As far as OOC-ness, I stand somewhere in the middle. I don't like to stray too far from canon, but 'the beaten path' surely isn't where I like to be.
Forgive me, but the characteristic of Tom Riddle that you deem essential is not the one that I deem essential. While that is something about him that makes him him I chose not to magnify that fact in order for the story to go the way I wanted it to.
That's a good point about him believing what other people say, but the point of this story was to show a different side of Tom. Not necessarily a made-up side, but one that maybe no one has shed light on.
Thank you for reviewing. =) Report Review
I'm sooo glad I got paired with you over at TGS for the Review Exchange! :) I was jumping up and down for joy when I saw we were paired together! I took sooo long to do my other exchange, because I was on vacation, but I decided to do yours right away, so I wouldn't forget! ;) Anyway, enough rambling, onto the review!
I have absoloutely no criticism for you m'dear! The only thing that caught my attention, was that there was a nicer side of Tom that we don't see. I always pictured him as the tormenting type, ya know?
Beautifully done, once again! :)
*AliciaAuthor's Response: Thank you! I promise, I'll get to yours soon. I have a day off today so I'll get to it =)
Thank you! That nicer side of Tom was intentional, actually. I understand your concern, but I wanted to emphasize my impression of him as a teenager which is that he is nice in order to get his way. And also, I wanted to show that he is a normal person with normal person problems. Thank you! Report Review
*glomps* So I'm finally here to review this. ^_^
I really enjoyed this rewrite of this one-shot. I think you definitely improved it since the last one. The whole fact that Riddle was put down and bullied and generally disliked was really believable and it's a nice new approach to his character.
My only criticism is that there are certain times where your dialogue just didn't flow. At least, in my opinion. Like here: "Well, Tom. Frankly, I couldn't care less if you loved me or not. I don't care what you think about anything. The only reason I knew your name is because everyone talks about you. They say that you don't mean anything here. It wouldn't make a difference to me if you disappeared forever. So take your stalker hormones to someone who will give them back to you." -- That just doesn't seem like something that someone would say, you know? Maybe in narrative, it would be fine, but when it's spoken out loud, it just doesn't work for me.
But besides those few moments where the dialogue is a bit off, I really love this one-shot. And the fact that Riddle stands up for Myrtle... well, I really liked this version of the story, Mids. The ending was absolute brilliance as well. Seriously, I loved it. And you know I'm telling you the complete truth. ^_^ Keep up the great work! You're absolutely amazing. *huggles*Author's Response: Yhey! Thank you! I kind of always pictured Tom to be the misunderstood, bullied type and I'm actually surprised that more authors didn't take this angle with him. Thanks =)
I understand what you mean, to an extent... I think. The dialogue you quoted seems realistic to me, given the time period. I tried to write it differently than I would write teens of Harry's time because it was kind of a while ago. I appreciate the criticism though. Perhaps I just got it wrong XD
I wanted to incorporate the relationship between Myrtle and Riddle because I wanted to connect them somehow. That way, since we know he ends up killing her, there would be an underlying sense of guilt for her. Irony, sort of.
Thank you so much! I really appreciate your honesty. =) Report Review
Ilia, I'm here to review as requested :]
You know, you never cease to amaze me? Time and time again I am utterly astounded. Your characterization of Tom...it's perfect. This is so, completely Tom Riddle. The rejected, saddened teenager who sets out for revenge. Perfect.
I honestly don't know how I am going to continue to compliment you if you continue to write pieces that simply blow my mind. The description, dialogue, characterization, all of it was so perfect. Ilia, I am humbled every time I read something of yours. I look at what you write and I see what I write and realize that the caliber of your writing is so much higher than that of my own. Your progression as an author has grown to paramount proportions.
ShelbyAuthor's Response: Oh, Twinsy. How do I even begin? I cannot thank you enough. Honestly, your praise means more to me than anything, though I feel that it is undeserved. I appreciate your comments, but it upsets me that you think my writing is so much better than yours. I firmly disagree.
In any case, I don't even know what to say. This review is beyond words. Thank you ♥ Report Review
Hey, Leslie from TGS here to review as requested ;)
I really did enjoy this one-shot. You did an amazing job writing Tom Riddle. I like how you had Tom suffer with no being noticed and getting rejected by the love of his affections before he ultimately became evil. Great job xD 10/10Author's Response: Thank you! I wasn't sure if people would accept this picture of him because I know he was kind of popular and loved at school, but I never imagined him that way. This is how I saw him. Thank you so much! Report Review
This is so interesting, Ilia! I saw you wrote something new and just had to check it out. I love it. Your writing is amazing.Author's Response: Thank you! So glad you liked it. You're too nice. ^_^ Report Review
Ilia! Wow, my dear! This was amazing.
I was so excited when I saw this. I was like: Wicked!! Eep, and I was curious how you would adapt that concept to this story. And you did it amazingly.
Your OCs were amazing. You are always fantastic at that, you always impress me. Your style, flow, plot, your uniqueness. It's all so wonderful!!
I'm so in love with all your work!! :D
10/10 AS ALWAYS!
xDAuthor's Response: Eek! Thank you! I'm sorry it wasn't about Wicked itself, as in the plot line of the musical, but I just love that title. This was one of the stories that I had in my past life, but I modified it quite a bit. Thank you so much for reviewing! Those are quite the compliments for a novice author like myself =P Thanks again ^_^ Report Review
Love it absolutely .And I love the title. I love WICKED. I don't know. Your stories are always a joy to find and read.
Femme ^_^Author's Response: Thank you! I love Wicked too. Thanks for reviewing ^_^ Report Review
This is a beautiful piece of writing. The beginning when Tom was describing Giselle was positively poetic. It is very different to see Tom as a social outcast. For some reason, I have always thought of him as being charming and popular but the way you described it made sense. The last paragraph was just.wow. Amazing. xDAuthor's Response: Thank you! I was kind of worried that when I continued the story, that poetic feel would be lost, but I think it worked... sort of. XD Thank you so much! I'm glad you liked it ^_^ Report Review
Wow. I've never pictured Tom Riddle coming to the rescue, hardly ever imagined him as being a hated geek. It was an interesting new view. And very believable, just as realistic as the popular, loved prefect that was told of in the books. Not for a minute did I think that anything other than Olive's gender was AU. Way to go!Author's Response: Thank you! That last bit about him saving Myrtle kind of came to me out of nowhere. I wasn't sure if I could fit it in, but I think I did an okay job with making it all come together. Thank you so much ^_^ Report Review
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