Reading Reviews for Surface Tension
42 Reviews Found

Review #1, by dracos_hotter Who You Are

4th January 2010:
Here from the forums!

Oh, it's... so... I can't quite put into words the way my heart breaks for him. It's such a simple, everyday deception, and yet you've written it so touchingly...

Sure, you do have some problems around grammar (speech, check the speech), but the turmoil in his brain is so well described I don't mind much.

First time writing slash? Good for you! New frontiers, and all that jazz =) It's very good in that respect, too.

I salute you on your new boundaries, long may this develop...


Author's Response: Aw, thank you! I wanted to keep it simple because it was my first attempt at slash so I didn't really know what I was doing. I didn't want to bite off more than I could chew.

I'm going to have to disagree with you about correct grammar in speech. I believe that because real people don't speak with perfect grammar, my characters shouldn't either. Thank you, though.

Thank you so much! ^_^

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Review #2, by Burke Who You Are

1st October 2009:
First thing I want to say is congratulations on a delicate subject that you have conveyed with dignity and respect.

You haven't made it into something crass and distastful and haven't ventured into any unrealistic stero-types in terms of a homeosexual character. Ken is interesting... In all honesty we don't see a lot about him and who he is, what he feels etc. but enought to empathise with him and feel sorry for him. So you captured the emotions surrounding him and his relationship with Cedric well.

I don't think this is cliched at all, just because it is a common occurance in the homosexual world, the confusion about realising who you are, what you like, how the world will react, what will happen, does not make it cliche rather it makes it realistic and I think you've tackled the confusion and fear well.

I am glad that Cedric has continued with Alicia, although it would be nice to see him come out of the closet in bounds it is obvious that he is not ready to accept himself yet, and thus definitly not ready for the rest of the world to know, no matter how strong his feelings for Ken are. So on a psychological level you've kept it very believable in his reaction and decision, which is hard in fiction as so often we know what sort of ending we would prefer and what sort of ending we want the character to have.

You've written an amazing piece of work here and I congratulate you on it! Feel proud of this and don't worry about it! As I can see from all the other reviews everyone agrees with me, you've written this very well and captured the emotions behind the situation beautifully and realistically.

You grammer, style, characterisation and flow all seem pretty faultless to me which makes this easy to read and adds to the great story line.

Congratulations on an amazing piece of work!
Burke. :-)

Author's Response: Thank you! It was a personal endeavor to write this piece, because I HATE slash. I don't even agree with homosexuality in real life, so writing this was a stretch. I appreciate your congratulations on a personal level. =)

I'm glad you could empathize with Ken. I know I didn't tell you a lot about him, but I felt that I wrote what needed to be said about him, and that's all.

The fear and confusion is the only way I could write this. If I actually focused on the homosexuality aspect of it in its essence, I don't think I would be able to continue with this. Because the homosexuality was mashed in there with all these other themes I'm familiar with, I could do it. Thank you so much. =)

I know it would have been nice to see Cedric conquer his fear and come out of the closet, and that's why I didn't write it. =P I'm all about the twist in writing, and I wanted to surprise readers.

Thank you so much! I am very proud of this piece, but I still worry about it. But this review has raised my confidence by a million percent. Thank you so much!

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Review #3, by lily flower Who You Are

28th September 2009:
oh.that's sad...poor ken...i really like it...cedric is so hot!!

Author's Response: Thank you!

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Review #4, by isa Who You Are

7th September 2009:
wow thats the first slash i read and i got to admit its good

Author's Response: Thank you! I don't normally write slash, so I'm glad you liked this one =)

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Review #5, by 1DarkAngel1 Who You Are

31st August 2009:
there are no words to descibe this story. but please can you do a sequel???

Author's Response: XD Thank you! Unfortunately, I don't think there will be a sequel here. Thanks, though!

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Review #6, by brunetteweasley Who You Are

26th August 2009:
Great stuff you have here. I could not tell this was your first time writing slash. Good job at not making the sex scene overly raunchy. You did a really good job at making the reader empathize with the characters, especially Ken. We've all had are heart's broken, maybe not in the same way as Ken's, but still. I felt for him. Great job overall, and looking forward to reading more :D

Author's Response: Thank you! Slash is definitely a stretch for me. Before writing this, I hadn't so much as looked at a slash story. Thank you so much! I'm glad you liked the way I wrote this. I was trying to keep it as tasteful as I could. Thank you!

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Review #7, by MajiKat Who You Are

19th August 2009:
Hiya, Maji here from TGS with your review xD

first off, congrats on your first slash. you did a wonderful job with a genre you had never written, and one that is so very sensitive.

i really liked your characterisation of cedric - the confusion and the guilt he felt was written wonderfully. the one thing i would like to have seen was more background on his sexuality - when did he first realise he was gay? how did it affect him to know? etc etc

ken was a great OC - self-assured and i felt very sad for him in the end. ced's actions - wow. nice touch of realism there - i have friends who have been in ced's position and at one stage, all of them continued to be in relationships they did not feel right being in - they hid themselves through fear of what friends, family etc would think. its very sad :(

the juxtaposition between ced and alicia and ced and ken was excellent! having that there was necessary i think - it helped show how confused Ced was.

there are some lovely lines of poetry in here and some intense images and description:
Her lips suddenly taste like arsenic.
he has no choice but to consume her toxic scent.
OUCH! she is poison to him - beautifully conveyed hun!

and this line is my fav:
He is willing to taste lies for the remainder of his school time if need be.
so sorrowful!!

all in all, i think you did a great job and you should def continue with the genre! you showed all the sensitivity a good slash deserves and at not one moment did i feel it was trite.

excellent job!!

Author's Response: Thank you! Slash was a whole new world and I didn't quite know which angle to take at it, but I'm so glad it came off nicely.

I chose Cedric for this part because I thought there must be something secret behind someone so popular, you know? I appreciate your concern, but I didn't want to overload this one-shot with too much background information. It would be interesting to see some more of his sexuality, but I feel that type of information would be better left for a chaptered story instead of a one-shot. Thank you =)

Ken was very fun to write =P I actually wanted to make him more nasty with Cedric, but it violated ToS =P I'm really glad my portrayal of Cedric's reaction was realistic. That was my main goal.

I'm so glad you picked up on the contrast of Cedric with Alicia and Cedric with Ken. That was important to me =)

Thank you so much! I'm actually planning a femmeslash right now so we'll see how that goes. =) This review has certainly upped my confidence in the genre. Thank you!

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Review #8, by KaraBlack Who You Are

15th August 2009:

I have NO idea why you had any worry about this story...AT ALL. It's brilliant! Fantastic and just

I'm normally a little more articulate in my reviews that I leave but holy crap! This was really great! Okay, okay, I need to stop gushing and try to give a proper review.

Firstly, I loved Cedric's character, it was absolutely fantastic really. He was very real, extremely believable and the conflict inside his head was just amazing to read. His emotions were just so...real that it was amazing. I even loved Alicia's role in it as well.

My heart is like...breaking for Ken. It's so SAD that he would chose Alicia over who he really cares for but it is also extremely realistic that he would chose what he thought everyone else would be most acceptable even though it's not what he wants.

Fantastic work here! It' Amazing.

I would pull out my favorite quotes but every word of it was fantastically written.


(sorry for taking so long to get this out to you!)

Author's Response: KARA!

Wow. How can you slap me with a review like this? How am I even supposed to respond?!

Thank you so much. To get such a reaction out of you makes my heart leap =) I really appreciate your emotional review ^_^

Cedric is creeping into more and more of my work. I think he's an awesome character and no one really gives him the attention he deserves. I'm glad you liked him too. =)

I know it was cruel what Cedric did to Ken (actually what I did to Ken XD) but I felt it would be more realistic if it wasn't a happy ending.

Thank you so much! I can't tell you how appreciative I am ^_^

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Review #9, by Axjion Who You Are

14th August 2009:
You dislike slash... and you wrote this? You should be proud! I find it to be rather impressive, and not cliche at all.

You capture well the inner-conflict that one goes through during this stage of accepting oneself -- the first time he rejects a female leading to his fears of others turning on him, his want rather to live a lie than to be ridiculed. Someone might tell you it's cliche, but having gone through it myself, I must say its so realistic.

I liked your OC, Ken; unafraid of what others think because he has Cedric. From that alone I can tell he's a really strong person, he has a more mature sense of self than most teenage boys. (Are you sure he's in the right house, sounds more like an aspect a Gryffindor would have ;p)

Thirdly, it was very discriptive and written in present tense, a favorite of mine. I add, in some places you touch into the past tense where you shouldn't, but it isn't so much a problem that it becomes noticable. Oh, and I love the line "And when he spoke, it was so smooth that it felt like the words were reaching down your throat and strangling you." Someone just talked to me tlike that and it's like you just wrote it about me.


Author's Response: It's true. I'm not a slash fan. Thank you, though! It really means a lot to hear that it's okay. =)

Really? You've gone through this yourself? I'm straight, but even just pretending to be in that position made me uncomfortable. Good for you =) And thank you.

That's an interesting point you make about Ken. I never really viewed him that way, to be honest. In my eyes while I was writing this, he was the bad guy. I'm glad you liked him!

XD Can you tell I have zero experience writing in present tense? XD Thanks for telling me I slipped out of it every once in a while. Thank you so much! I'm really glad you could connect to this story so well, and I really appreciate your review =)

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Review #10, by taylorj828 Who You Are

8th August 2009:
taylorj828 here for your review! This was really marvelous, and I would never know you were writing slash for the first time! Well done! So what I've done is mark everything that stood out, and it'll go in sequential order.

"What am I doing?"

This line stands out in the non-italicized section, because in the rest of the story, Cedric doesn't refer to himself as "I." It seems natural in the italicized part, because he is remembering and thinking. When writing in third person, though, the only time "I" is used is when we delve directly into their thoughts. You could change it to, "What is he doing?" and we will know Cedric is referring to himself. It's just something I noticed right away. Not a big deal, just a picky little minor detail-y thing. :oP

He would have to help prove his point.

Which point? In context we conclude that he means the straight/gay point, but the 'help' throws me off, because we haven't necessarily put together yet what he's started proving. It would be a meaningful line even without the word 'help,' but it's just one person's thoughts, mind you. (o:

Her touch is gentle but he cannot bear it.
But he must.

Two buts don't make it right. Har, har. :oP It flows better not to repeat words close together, like with 'but.' It would carry equal impact to remove the second 'But," or you could substitute it with something like, "However."

His roommates had agreed to leave him alone for the night, and now Cedric is almost regretting it.

Oh, Cedric! Poor lad! There, there!

Straddling her, he is scared to hurt her. There is no stability beneath him, no strength. He felt like he was going to hurt her. But he knows this is what she wants and what he should want.

All of your other lines are in the present tense, but 'felt' is in the past. It's best not to switch tenses. "He feels like he is going to hurt her."

So he forces himself to put his right hand up her shirt, as gently as he could while still feigning emotion, and his left hand cradled her back, arched in his grip.

Again, an issue with present/past tenses. " gently as he can, while still feigning emotion, and his left cradles her back, arched in his grip."

He puills up her shirt, wondering if she will stop him. She doesn’t; she helps him.

Typo with 'pulls.' Also, I love the last line, two short bits, creating emphasis. Great job!

he has no choice but to consume her toxic scent

Wow, that makes her sound really foul! What about telling us more about the toxic smell? Is it also flowery, sickeningly sweet, too much vanilla? Definitely keep the word toxic, it's not my complaint. Just, if you wanted, you could add another descriptor to show what's so toxic about it.

Her softness is nearly irresistible but something in him rejects it. But she does not mind; she wants him.

Two buts again. What about: 'She does not appear to mind; she wants him.' ?

“You all right?” said the voice.

No need for past tense. 'says the voice.'

“Are you okay?” she says.
You all right?
Same question, completely different circumstances. The answer is not the same. Not even close. Then, he was sure of himself. He was ready to succumb to the pressure, willing even. But now? No. He can’t do this. This is not who he is.

LOVE this! Love the two questions, back to back. Great work here!

Cedric tore himself away from her body, removed her hand from his thigh. He sat up, propping himself on his elbow. She lay below him, looking confused. He looked at her and saw the lost look in her eyes, the fear. It broke his heart to have to end it this way, but there is no other way in which he could live with himself.

But then right afterward, you switch to past tense! From this point on in the story, you sort of jump back and forth at different times, so I would watch your tenses and keep it streamlined.

Suddenly he longs to cover his bare chest.

I love this detail...! It's one of those small things that really brings a character or scene to life!

“You go ahead and take all the time you want. I’m sure it will be worth the wait,” she says, gathering her shirt and snatching it into her grip, as well as picking up her comb from the bedside table, “for someone else.”

Oh dear! I love what the girl says, totally clever of you! But I don't think it has the impact that it should because of how it's broken up with the details. I like the details, but it detracts from the impact of the last three words she says. It might just be my feeling, but I think rearranging it would bring more impact.
Like: "You go ahead and take all the time you want. I’m sure it will be worth the wait,” she says, “for someone else.” She gathers her shirt and snatches it into her grip, picking up her comb from the bedside table as well.

Just my thoughts, though. (o:

...leaving him alone in his bed with the curtains closed unnecessarily; the reason has just walked out.

Another great line! Enjoyed this!

So when you started describing Ken, I began wondering what House he was in, because for some reason I wasn't thinking Slytherin. Anyway, I love that it's a Hufflepuff and Slytherin. That's just too awesome!

The thought of telling everyone that he, the Triwizard Champion, top of his class, is homosexual, rocks him.

I think you need a comma to help the readers with this sentence. I bolded the comma where it would be helpful to have one, after homosexual.

[ be continued in PM. Sorry, but I hit the character limit and there are a couple more paragraphs. Anyway, check your PM box for the rest, please!]

Author's Response: Okay, I've decided to try and tackle this awesome review.

First of all, thank you so much. This is exactly the kind of critique I was looking for. =)

That first-person bit just sort of popped out of me. I should have edited it out because it would make more sense without it, so thank you for pointing that out.

Prove his point - I meant the point that nothing was wrong. I should have explained that better, but when I was writing this, I knew what I was talking about and I was so into it that I wasn't considering the reader. I need to edit better.

That's an interesting point you make about too many 'but's. I'll definitely have to keep that in mind. Thank you!

Oh, the tenses. Can you tell I'm not used to writing in present tense? XD Thanks for pointing those out.

I'm so glad you noticed those little lines. Those are my favorites too, and it's so good to know that my work is not overlooked. =)

Thank you so much for this critical review. I really needed it, and I appreciate it. =)

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Review #11, by CelticKisses Who You Are

2nd August 2009:
Wow sweetie - I found this to be truly beautiful. There were parts I adored and parts I didn't find entirely believable - but those were few and far between. First - the overall idea of this is beautiful and hits home for many people. This is the culture I live in, as an ally and avid gay activist myself, and some of the closest people in my world have struggled with this very thing and I have held more than one hand as they battled these very thoughts. Thank you for so beautifully putting that struggle in to words. I loved your characterization of Cedric. I loved his inner dialogue and I LOVED the juxtaposition between his moments with Alica and his moments with Ken. The only things I didn't like was that he did not find the strength in the end - I find that heartbreaking, truly tragic as I imagine the men in my life who struggle with this. The only other thing I didn't like was the character of Ken - but that is strictly my preference against your vision and must be taken with a grain of sand. I would reccomend this fic. Thank you for asking me to review it. Truly.

Author's Response: Thank you! It's my first slash so parts that you didn't believe were probably inevitable =P I know a few friends who are already 'out' but I've never known anyone who was going through the struggle, so this one was kind of a stretch. I'm really glad you thought it was okay, though.

The fact that he didn't come out in the end was my preference for unhappy endings =P And Ken... I don't know why but I imagined him to be a snake-like jerk.

Thank you so much! This review has made me so happy ^_^

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Review #12, by Blissbug Who You Are

30th July 2009:
Oh my gosh, before I can even say 'Hello I'm here for your review' I have to gush instead because this is a wonderful piece of writing! As your first piece of slash -- and by the way, congradulations -- this is a very warm, touching and sensitive piece.

I'm struck by the smooth integration of past and present and how the one so compliments the other. You mange to build and release tension with equal parts of talent and grace.

Your imagery is also very well done. I was most struck by the comparison of Alicia's fragile body next to Ken's strong one. I absolutely adored that line!

This is a great piece of writing and I'm thrilled you asked for a review in my thread. It broke my heart, made me sigh and desperately wish the story were longer than a one-shot. Good job!



Author's Response: Thank you so much! Slash is a big accomplishment for me - I'm not sure I'll ever be able to tackle it again. I'm really glad you liked this story.

It's good to know that my little comparison lines like the one you pointed out are not missed, because I do work hard on those.

Thank you so much! I really appreciate your review ^_^

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Review #13, by soliloquy Who You Are

30th July 2009:
AH. I really liked this story. Like. A LOT. This might be your first time writing slash, but it's not cliche at ALL. I actually really like the awkwardness - it just fits so well with Cedric's personality! Though, poor Ken. This is excellent work!

I really enjoy slash like this. It's just the right amount of awkward! Keep up the good work! ^^

Author's Response: Thank you! I'm so glad you liked it. I was really worried that my hatred for slash would come across but I'm so happy it didn't. Thanks so much!

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Review #14, by Jazzeh Turnip Who You Are

28th July 2009:
Wow. For a first attempt of a genre you dislike, this is pretty amazing. I could never write a genre I dislike and, despite liking slash, I don't think I could every write any. I admire you xD.

The characters are very good. I love how you made Cedric almost shun himself and try to force himself to be something he isn't. You wrote that spectacularly well. I like the character of Ken, and I truly did expect Cedric to end up with him and when he didn't I felt so sorry for him.

I love how you've written all of this actually. Most of the fics I've read written in 3rd person are terrible, even books that have been published but are written in 3rd person, but I really enjoyed reading this. Thanks for asking me to review it. I don't think I've ever read something quite like this :D

I couldn't see ANY mistakes (I love it when I can say that :D). It's so good to read something and not see any out of place or missing comma's and stuff like that so... THANK YOU!

10/10 :)

Author's Response: Thank you! I was hoping it wouldn't show that I hate slash. =)

It amazes me how you got EVERYTHING I wanted the reader to get. You hit every point right on the head. I could just hug you ^_^

I actually don't care for the restriction third person gives me, but it's good to know that I pulled this off well.

Grammar Nazi here! No, thank YOU.

Thank you so much!

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Review #15, by padfoot4ever Who You Are

28th July 2009:
Hi! Heather here from TGS with your request :)
First of all - this was amazing. If you're applying for promotion on TGS, I would suggest submitting this. I think the admins would really like it!
I'm generally not a reader of slash. It's not that I'm opposed to it or anything, I just never really got into it. But I think that this is a whole lot better than a lot of the het-fics I've read.
Considering this is your first time writing slash, I have to say that it is fantastically well-written. I think you've really captured Cedric's confusion. The love he has for both Alicia and Ken is so true to his character. He is a Hufflepuff after all, and he'd want to be fair to both. Cedric is very in-character in this story, despite the fact that he is gay. This is definitely how a guy coming to terms with these kind of feelings would act - he would take back his girlfriend and pretend like everything is normal.
I loved the style at the beginning, how he is with Alicia in body, but his mind is elsewhere. He has come out to himself, but nobody else. The conflict is just so real. He is a Triwizard Champion and he thinks it more socially acceptable to be with a girl - he's almost scared of his own feelings. I just love the emotions you have going on, they're fantastic!
I like Ken too, how you've created someone so different to Cedric, and how we get to know him in only a few lines. I think he and Cedric would fit - opposites attract and all that.
This was an excellent piece of writing, really. I have such sympathy for Cedric, Ken and Alicia - none of them will be happy in the end, really.
10/10 - amazing! :) Thanks for requesting!

Author's Response: Wow, thank you! I actually took your advice and submitted this piece for promotion. Wish me luck!

Wow, what a compliment! Better than some het-fics? Wow... I wish I knew something better to say than 'wow'.

You understood every point I wanted the reader to understand, so that makes me happy. I guess I just figured if anyone was going to be hiding int he closet, it would be Cedric.

I really can't thank you enough for this great review. Thank you so much!

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Review #16, by LonelyStar Who You Are

28th May 2009:
Hey, LonelyStar here from the forums with the review you requested :)

This was amazing, especially when this was your first attempt at slash. I have read a few slash fics since I quite like them, and from reading your it would seem to me you have written slash a few times, so I was quite impressed when you said this was your first time.

I liked your OC character Ken, and he made a nice contrast to Cedric because he was more open with his sexuality. And I liked how you wrote how Cedric liked him, and liked being with him, but still dumped him over Alicia because he was embarrassed. It showed a different side to Cedric, but a believable one from a boy.

Your writing in this was good too, no grammar or spelling mistakes that I could see. And pace and flow was excellant. You did great in that area of the one-shot.


Author's Response: Thank you! It's such a relief to hear that this was a good attempt at slash since I'd never tried it before. I'm glad you liked it. =) I figured Cedric's indecision would be a realistic part of his character, and since he seemed so perfect in the books, I thought it would be interesting to see a different side of him. Thank you so much! I'm glad you liked it ^_^

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Review #17, by PenguinsWillReignSupreme Who You Are

20th May 2009:
First things first, I know exactly how you feel with this being your first attempt at slash. I tried my hand at it a couple of weeks ago, so I can totally relate to how you feel.

I thought it was fantastic, simply. I loved the contrast between how Cedric feels when he's with Ken and when he's with Alicia (nice choice, by the way). If I hadn't known it was slash, I wouldn't have guessed from this first section. It was subtly done (if you ignore the nature of the words, anyway).

I think you portrayed the confusion that he must feel excellently. I don't think there was anything especially cliched involved. Amos' letter was a good touch; such a subtle line that should be meaningless was in fact so important.

Ken's downright honesty was also interesting. His straight-talking nature really brings across the difference between one at ease with his sexuality, and one in denial. I found his appearance a little strange, and I don't wholly understand the significance of it here, but I can kind of see why you did it. I love the way in which you've brought Ken across. He seemed a little creepy but the change in him, to someone caring and gentle, was fantastic. It would have been interesting to see something from his point of view. I think he's an interesting character.

Anyway, I really enjoyed it. For your first attempt at slash, it was very impressive - I'm sorry this review is a little on the short side, but I don't have a great deal to give any CC on!

Rachelle from TGS

Author's Response: Thank you! It's hard, isn't it? XD Really? Thanks! I didn't really know how to write a slash story without relating it to his confusion, because of the little about homosexuality I know and have seen in my life, it's mainly about confusion of feelings and the pressure of what society accepts.

To be honest, I wanted Amos's letter to be a stab directly at the heart of my reader. I hope it worked =)

The last bit with Ken was actually down-played quite a bit because of the ToS, but I like how it turned out nonetheless. I didn't really think too much about why I made Ken look the way he looked; it just sort of happened. But thank you for understanding =)

Thank you so much! To be honest, I was a little scared to get a review from you because I respect your opinions and your writing so much, so it really was a treat to get this great review from you. Thanks again!

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Review #18, by Annachie Who You Are

17th May 2009:
Excellent story. Slash is fairly new to me, and I'm impressed with this one.
Have you ever considered the other side of the slash? I'm curious how'd you do since this is so good.

I like the comparison style of writing at the start. The italics vs the normal. A gread depiction of internal conflict I reckon.

Author's Response: Thank you! I'm glad you liked it. I don't quite understand what you mean, though... the other side of slash? Thanks again for the great review ^_^

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Review #19, by Drecklin Who You Are

16th May 2009:
I am here for my incredibly overdue review XD Sorry about making you wait so long! Anyways, you asked me to tell you how you did regarding the slash. Well, you did flat out amazing. I admit, I'm not the most ardent slash lover, but this piece was truly one that could grab the love of everyone! It was certainly original, I've never read something where there is so much emotion. The reader really feels like they are Cedric, and they feel his pain, which is a skill that amazes me! I was sucked in from the beginning, and your writing just makes it such a great read, you certainly have a distinct style Minda! I particularly loved how you had sort of a comparison in there, his romance with Alicia, and his love for Ken. It was nice to not only see how he felt towards men, but his reactions towards women too. It thickened the meaning :) I honest to goodness have no criticism for this. It was just fantastic in every way! 10/10


Author's Response: Sarah! -huggles- No worries at all. I understand how it is. Thank you! I don't like slash either and that's why writing this was a huge step for me. Seriously, I can't thank you enough. Your praise means so much to me. ^_^ I wanted to show his confusion between liking men and liking women, because I feel like that is realistic and not a lot of authors portray that. Thank you so much! I really appreciate your review ^_^

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Review #20, by PrincessPadfoot Who You Are

16th May 2009:
A VERY well written one-shot. I have been reading more slash lately, and I have to say that yours is one of the best that I have ever read. You did a great job.

Author's Response: Thank you! Since this is my first slash, it really means so much to me to hear that this one was good. Thanks so much!

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Review #21, by The Empress Who You Are

11th May 2009:
Ahh, that's so sad! I think it's wonderfully written though. Insecurities, wants, desires and just being a teenager all bundled together with sex. :) You did a great job writing this. The characters came across really well and it wasn't a fuzzy, warm, happy ending that we may have wanted but that the characters wouldn't have really gotten. Great!

Author's Response: Thank you! XD I am so glad you liked it. I tried to make it as realistic as possible, so I'm really glad it turned out that way. Thank you so much!

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Review #22, by TheDirigiblePlum Who You Are

10th May 2009:
I've never really read slash before (why is it called slash anyway? lol) but I thought this was very good! His internal struggle is very well written, with his worries about what people will think. Also I think the ending is also realistic, even if if isn't what we wanted.
I think it would take a lot of courage to "come out" in a boarding school like Hogwarts, and it can't be expected that everyone could manage to do that.

I thought it was very believable and I enjoyed reading it :)


Author's Response: XD I have no idea why it's called slash. That's a good question =P Thank you! I really wanted this one to show the realism of slash because often on this site it is romanticized. Thank you so much!

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Review #23, by LuckySeven Who You Are

10th May 2009:
Hello! So, I've got to say that you're doing great!
Quoting you, "This is my first attempt at slash, which I generally dislike." I'm happy to see that you're going out of your comfort zone. Too many authors stay within defined parameters. So, good for you! I don't read much slah, so I don't much point of reference. But, I think that you did well! Great work. Keep writing.

Author's Response: Thank you! When the idea came to me, I really had no choice but to go with slash because that was what the plot called for. I am proud of myself for going outside my comfort zone, as you said, so thank you very much. Thank you!

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Review #24, by emerald_moons Who You Are

7th May 2009:
Hello again, you requested not too long ago! Glad to see you're trying out slash, I am too. :)

Aw, wow, you make me jealous (especially because the pairing I'm supposed to use for my challenge story is Cedric/Harry). This is so beautiful, flowing. You can understand Cedric, his fear and his decision. It's realist, which you excel in doing! I'm in shock, and I wish it could have worked, but that would take away the heartbreak.
A solid ten, for sure.


Author's Response: Thank you! XD I didn't mean to make you jealous, but it is one heck of a compliment. It really is wonderful to hear that this piece is a success because it is my first attempt at slash and I really wanted to get it right. Thank you so much ^_^

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Review #25, by JohnnyPickAlot Who You Are

1st May 2009:
Hiya, Sarah here by request.
Oh wow. This was intense. You said that you've never wrote slash before, other than this. And I must say, this is an excellent first try.
It captured all the right emotions/feelings and the confusion that Cedric must be feeling.
Well done. I really enjoyed it. [Poor Ken]

Author's Response: Thank you! Phew, it's so good to hear that I executed this one well. I was scared to write this. Thank you so much! I really appreciate your review.

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