Here's my review, as requested!
I'd like to start off with mentioning I don't know this Army Wives show, or anything about it for that matter, including the lingo. So I'm not going to be much help assessing your characterization of Amanda.
Your writing style is very good, and makes a story I'd otherwise have little interest in (since I'm unfamiliar with the crossover story) and making it readable.
It is a bit AU in my opinion, considering this is the summer before Harry's 5th year, and thus the summer he is angsty and incommunicado from everyone else, so I'm finding it a bit out of character for him to be playing quidditch and having a nice time at the Burrow.
Something else that I found a bit off-putting was how quickly Hermione and everyone else told this random girl about the magical world. I just can't see them telling her that pretty much a couple of hours after meeting her, and also for this girl to accept the reality of magic so readily (it even took an 11 year old Harry longer).
Why does Hermione think the current situation is critical? Do I sense some hints at an Amanda/FredorGeorge pairing?
A nitpicky grammar note: a couple of times you wrote "Charleston South Carolina" which should read "Charleston, South Carolina". Other than that I didn't pick up on any spelling or grammar issues.
I don't want my review to come across as too negative, seeing as this is a crossover fic, and thus it's expected to be a bit AU and you'd need to alter characters a bit to make it work. I did really enjoy your descriptions and the flow of the story, and think that someone interested in Army Wives and Harry Potter would probably be quite interested in this well-written story.Author's Response: *bares that in mind*
Unfortunately when coming along with trying to add Amanda into the mix I had to make it a bit more AU than I would have liked. Hermione thinks its critical because this girl just randomly appeared on a different continent although it does make sense that it seems too abrupt. *nods* There were hints of that but of other pairings that could happen while at Hogwarts as well.
It's not negative at all! I asked for a new perspective for me to figure out what to do with this fic seeing as it's been sitting so long. Hence this is really helpful thank you very much!
Megs Report Review
Wow, love it so far, it's very different! Wonder how she will cope with catching up on 7 years of magical education! Keep updating please :DAuthor's Response: Thank you very much for your input. I'm not sure if I'm continuing with this story but if I do I promise that updates will be more regular! I'm really glad you liked it. ^^ Report Review
I love it! I cannot wait to see where you take this! Keep up the good work. The only suggestion I have is to switch up your words a bit. For Instance, instead of saying 'the girl', say 'Amanda'. I will be looking forward to your next update!Author's Response: Thank you for that input. It really meant a lot to me. I'm sorry I didn't get back to responding to this until now but I kinda went AWOL from the site and then was busy posting stories and not replying to reviews *insert shamed face here*. I'm not sure if I'm going to keep going with this story but I did want to say I really appreciated the review. ^^ Report Review
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