Reading Reviews for Goodbye Memory Lane
  
27 Reviews Found

Review #1, by Debra20 Goodbye Memory Lane

10th October 2012:
Hey there marina! This is a story I've been meaning to read for some time now, but never really got to doing it before. So here I am :)

I am always craving for any Alice and Frank stories but this one is just wow! It's one of the best I have read. I guess I'll start off by saying how excited I am because of the characterization of the couple. We don't have many details to go by in the books and yet you managed to pull off a very believable and real and deep personality for both of them in only these few words. My heart aches for both of them. I loved the part when Frank, despite his terrible pain, pulls himself across the floor just so that he can reach Alice and be with her. To see if she's still there.

It was a very sad (but well handled!) moment when Frank realizes that she's forgotten who she was...who he was. What's worse than death is memory loss. It's harder on the family and the people you leave behind because you can neither mourn your loss nor actually be with them, you know? It must be a very hard burden to bear. That's one of the many reasons why I honestly respect Neville.

Another aspect of the story that I appreciated is how Frank was the last of the two to lose consciousness and that's only because he understood that she was lost forever. I simply can't imagine how much agony that can produce in someone. He was already affected by the Death Eaters spell but seeing his wife like that, and realizing that, himself is hopeless and can't help her, was what really broke him.

A truly sad yet wonderful piece!

Author's Response: Thanks so much! I find their story so desperately tragic, but it's amazing how Neville rises from the ashes so well and I also respect him so much for it. Thank you for reviewing!

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Review #2, by Devon.Eva Goodbye Memory Lane

8th July 2012:
Wow. What an incredible, talented writer you are. This story made me cry. Literally I couldn't stop the tears. I have read many of your pieces and I absolute adore them, but this one in particular stands out in my mind. I have always wanted to read more about Alice and Frank Longbottom, to hear their story, and honestly I think you nailed it. Incredible, darling, please please keep writing.

Author's Response: Wow, thank you so so much. It's lovely to know that you loved it and it means even more to me that you like many of my other pieces. I always think you can get a much better feel for an author when you've read more of their stories so it's so flattering to know you like mine. Thank you!

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Review #3, by dirtydeedsdonedirtcheap Goodbye Memory Lane

5th May 2012:
Real fear strikes me now, stronger than the fear of the pain or the fear of death. It is the fear of losing my identity, forgetting who I am; losing my memories. What is the point of a life forgotten? Pieces of mind are slipping through my fingers, I can feel it; no matter how I try to grasp them they leave me. Moments that seem a lifetime ago flash before my eyes.

I shuddered while reading this. I rarely see Frank and Alice stories and even if I fell on them I don't think I would read them to be honest. Their outcome, their terrible, terrible end is just to much to read about. So heartbreaking that he had to watch his wife escape him and then he lost himself. It just happened so quickly that's what makes this even more emotional. Poor Neville.

Wonderful job.

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Review #4, by Secret Santa Goodbye Memory Lane

18th December 2011:
Hello :)

Real quick, two SMALL things I noticed.

"I tear falls from my eye, the fluid dripping onto her robes." ~Instead of I, I think you wanted A.

"Her laughter in infectious, and I have a hard time feeling sad around her." Instead of in, is.

Past those two things, I'm speechless. I have NEVER read an Alice/Frank story, and this is just...breathtaking, stunning, absolutely amazing. It made a shiver run down my spine at how well written, how strong this piece is. And the characterization? Wow. Absolutely amazing job!

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Review #5, by Harrypotterbookworm Goodbye Memory Lane

5th August 2011:
Heart wrenching. Utterly heart wrenching. You beautifully link together all the stages of ... I don't know what you'd call them but him slowly loosing his memory ect. is wonderfully linked together. From my point of view, it seems that after each memory he slowly gets more and more lucid, I guess you could say.

Speaking of the memories, the memories you choose to put in here are perfect. They add to a way that enhances the loosing the memory business, but doesn't take any concentration away from this story and in to another. And that, I have to say, takes a lot of skill. Great job.

While it is a little confusing at times, just with what's happening and where they are, it actually adds to the story, for you can imagine that he wouldn't be the most aware person in the universe right at that moment. Also, the characterisation of both of them is beautifully done, especially Frank's description of how she makes him feel complete ect.

Overall, amazing. Just ... amazing. I can't say anything else. Hugs,

- HPB (otherwise known as nikkinike from Ravenclaw) ;D

Author's Response: ee thanks Nikki! ♥

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Review #6, by Veela_is_me Goodbye Memory Lane

21st January 2010:
i really loved this story, it's one of those rare stories that actually touch me. i actually felt sad after reading this, so i think you wrote it very well.
Veela_is_me

Author's Response: thank you very much, I'm flattered that it touched you :)

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Review #7, by Marauders001 Goodbye Memory Lane

21st June 2009:
That was brilliant. Absolutely brilliant. I was just looking at your concerns you added in the request and I really donít think you should have any.

You describe the pain so well. The memories that you had, the wedding and the coffin, they were fantastic. I could see the pictures in my mind as if they were my own memories.

Your actual story was very good, the idea. Iíve read a few with Frank and Alice after the attack, I think your was more interesting because it shows the damage as it happens, the memories slowly slipping. How Frank can no longer remember how Alice was before the attack...

Itís very clever and very interesting to read. I actually wiped away a few tears.

Be proud of it.

X. Marauders.

I am so sorry for the delay in posting, lots of problems, i loved your story, it was totally awesome *hands cyber cookie

Author's Response: dont worry about the delay, its a busy time of year :)

and I am proud, thank you so much for taking the time to review!


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Review #8, by _Kai Rhianne_ Goodbye Memory Lane

12th May 2009:
uhm - WOW seriously angst much?
It was good! A unique take on the ship the world forgot...
dang it, there should be more alice/frank stories!
xx

Author's Response: there should! thanks for reviewing!

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Review #9, by xXmalfoysgirl4everXx Goodbye Memory Lane

14th March 2009:
Wow. That was brilliant. I loved it. I never would have thought that it would be that way; loosing his sanity. You characterized Frank very well, I had a clear vision of the scene in my mind. The descriptions were wonderful, and it helped the story a lot.

great job!
10/10 :D
--ron.weasleyxo from the forums

Author's Response: thank you so much! I paid partucular attention to the descriptions when I wrote this! I'm thrilled you loved it :D

- Marina


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Review #10, by Illuminate Goodbye Memory Lane

8th March 2009:
This is really brilliant. You wrote this so well it's as if this happened to you yourself.

The plot flow is desirable and your characters are so solid it's like I know them myself.

This is a wonderful little one-shot! Well done! 10/10.

Author's Response: thank you so much! I assure you, though, that Bellatrix hasn't tortured me! She's really fluffy in RL ^.^

thank you ever so much for this review :D

- Marina


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Review #11, by Erised Goodbye Memory Lane

7th March 2009:
Hello! This is Erised, and here is your review. :)

You've got a nice little one-shot here. An unusual ship, great vocab, and I think you've perfectly captured the inner workings of Frank Longbottom's mind. It flowed well, and the character development was good and accurately depicted. No need to worry about those, in my opinion.

The paragraph where Frank describes Alice as his soulmate I found particularly moving, and the paragraph links well into the next flashback.

I also like how Frank refers to the Death Eaters as 'they' and 'them' at first; it portrays Frank's fear decently, aswell as adding to the overall tension of the fic.

Your ending was also great, and as for the last line, it made me feel a little creeped out!

Couple of things though:
1. There's a flashback scene where Frank describes his father's funeral. He says, "I do not understand the evils of the world." I feel that this is a little unrealistic. You write at the end of the flashback that Frank wishes revenge on the Death Eaters; surely he would have at least been a little aware of these evils? If you want, perhaps you could change it to something like, "I have been forced to understand the evils of the world." your choice :)

2. A little more variation of punctuation would be good too. You use a lot of full stops; semi colons are very helpful at creating pauses too. Colons also add dramatic tension aswell.

On the whole, this is a lovely story that is very well written. I really enjoyed reading it, well done!

Author's Response: ah Jenny... how come i didnt reply to this! But thank you so much for the helpful feedback! thank you xxx

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Review #12, by alanapotter Goodbye Memory Lane

6th March 2009:
Stunning. Utterly beautiful.

I am absolutely mesmerized, there are not enough adjectives in the English language for me to describe this piece.

Your writing is elegant, the different pieces carefully entwined to bring the audience into Frank's mind as he slowly decays into the person we know. I love how you used Alice as a trigger to his demise - his loss of self. Your descriptions were very prominent, but not over the top, and the way you use his thoughts to describe everything makes dialogue useless (note here, I'm a very big fan of dialogue as a way to get to know the character better, so what I mean is that the way you wrote his thoughts, dialogue would've ruined the story).

The integration of the flashbacks was also incredible! It flowed magnificently and really allowed me to connect with Frank as a person.

And of course, being the grammar policewoman that I am, I'm going to suggest a proofread for a couple simple mistakes... There was one sentence that said I instead of A... but nothing important, it didn't drag the story down at all.

I really loved this piece! Fabulous job! It's also being added to my favorites list :]

-Jill

Author's Response: wow, thank you so much Jill! Your words are so encouraging and I'm truly flattered and honoured that you could say such things about my writing. Thank you so much for reviewing!

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Review #13, by long_live_luna_bellatrix Goodbye Memory Lane

2nd March 2009:
This was really, really good. It seems to be the exact thing that happened when the Longbottoms are tortured, and the way you wrote Frank slowly losing his mind was great. You wrote him perfectly! I was also glad you mentioned Neville. There are many accounts, especially with Remus, Tonks, Alice and Frank, where they don't mention the parent realizing that they're losing a kid, which I don't like. All four adults were great people, great parents, so I was glad you had Frank think about Neville there for a second.

There was only one typo (bravo): "I tear falls from my eye, the fluid dripping onto her robes."

It was a really interesting story, and I haven't read a ton of Frank POVs, but you wrote him incredibly well. Nice work!

~lllb

Author's Response: Actually, I almost fell into the trap of forgetting Neville, but then as I went through it I realised it didnt make sense without him.

Thanks for pointing out the typo, I'll change that right away :)

thank you so much! :D

- Marina


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Review #14, by Pretty Purple Pelican Goodbye Memory Lane

1st March 2009:
That was absolutely bone-chilling. I think the thing that strikes me most about this is the title. Memory Lane has such a nice connatation and to put it in a horrific situation like that had a fantastic effect on me as a reader. I really loved the explanation for the fear, too. Great job! :)

Author's Response: this was so unexpected, and I'm so flattered :) I completely love the title as well, it's my favourite thing about the whole piece. It seems to sit so well with what I had in mind...

thank you so much for reviewing :)

- Marina


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Review #15, by I_LOVE_love Goodbye Memory Lane

28th February 2009:
Oh my god. That was amazing! That was written so beautifully!! My eyes were full to the brim with tears threatening to spill over by the time I got to the ending...that was one of the best one-shots I have ever read, ever!! That was sooo good and sad, and I loved it!
10/10
*love*

Author's Response: oh thank you so much!! I'm so happy now!

- Marina


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Review #16, by WeasleyTwins Goodbye Memory Lane

28th February 2009:
Hello Marina, I'm here to review. Sorry for the delay :]

Okay, first off I'd like to say that I found the POV of this story fitting. I know in the last review I put that I wasn't fond of first person, but this was too rich. There was something about the first person narrative that just entangled itself delightfully with the story. The POV and the storyline fit perfectly. It touched me deeply. The glimpses of memory added just enough emotion to really sink in deep. They added to the flow of the story nicely and tied it all in together. Frank's journey from sanity to insanity was most beautifully written. His thought processes and descriptions set the scene excellently. The development was written to perfection; it's as if he went through stages of insanity. The verb tense was vivid beyond comparison!

This surpassed my expectations, that's for sure. You're an amazing writer, but this piece exemplified your creative engineering.

I don't think that my praise is enough for this, 10/10

Shelby

Author's Response: I'm glad you liked this one in first person :) I'm just so pleased you liked it, as I wasnt really sure about it when I posted. I thought the memories were too brief, but you've given me a confidence boost :D

thanks so much, Shelby. it means so much to me!

OK, I'm going to be on a high all evening :D you're too nice!

- Marina


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Review #17, by confusedlover Goodbye Memory Lane

22nd February 2009:
very lovely.

this was beautiful. absolutely beautiful. i loved this; that much i can express.

the flow of this story contrasted very well with the plot of things. at no point did it seem rushed or paced too quickly. honestly, things seemed to be in the right place. your words choice worked efficiently and your style and artistic design mirrored well.

the development of Frank in particular was quite interesting to witness as a reader. in most cases, characters do not suffer a wild or drastic change in complexity throughout the course of one simple chapter, but it was lovely to read something that portrayed a major development in such a short laspe of time. you made Frank's change realistic and cannon and i have absolutely no complaints with the way Frank worked out.

overall, i thought that you did an amazing job on this entire story. the only suggestion that i have for you is to make things a bit less repetitive. the story itself was not, but the word choice and punctuation was a bit distracting. wonderful job though. this was a very pleasant and enjoyable read for me.

Author's Response: oh thank you so much *blushes* I think this was so hard to write, for me, because it's such a sensitive and difficult change in Frank and Alice. It's a lot harder to do over a short period of time, but I'm so glad that you thought it worked.

I'll go back and revise my word choice and punctuation. I think I've got into a couple of bad habits, and it's difficult to spot when I'm using the same sentence structure etc. but I'll look over it, thanks for pointing that out :)

thanks for reviewing!

- Marina


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Review #18, by rachm34 Goodbye Memory Lane

22nd February 2009:
oh my gosh, I'm sobbing. This struck me so unbelievably hard. You wrote this amazingly. Oh goodness, you never cease to amaze me do you?This was so beautiful marina. I absolutely loved it. There;s nothing i have but Praise for you. wow.

Author's Response: oh Rachel! thank you so so so much :D please don't cry too much! *hands tissue* I don't like making my reviewers cry :(

thank you so much for reviewing!

- Marina


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Review #19, by Phoenix_Flames Goodbye Memory Lane

22nd February 2009:
Hello, there, dear! I'm here with your review!

Wow, you never fail to impress me. All of your stories are amazing. Breath-taking.

I've never read a story like this - but I say that for all of your stories!

I really enjoyed the flashbacks. They were very nice and refreshing and added a little "umpf" into the background information. Very nice.

Frank and Alice were characterized amazingly. I believe they would be just like this.

This was amazing. As always - nothing but praise, love. ^_^ Always feel free to drop by.

-Drue

10/10

Author's Response: Thank you so much, Drue! I think I have an addiction to requesting reviews :| haha but I'll stop by next time the whim takes me.

the words "i've never read a story like this" are words that I honestly dream to hear. I strive to be as unique and individual as possible (I dont know if you can tell? :P) so your comment really makes it all worth it.

When I got this phobia for a challenge, they instantly came to mind, and I knew there was nothing else I could write about! Some things are just meant to be :)

thank you so so much for reviewing, this has made my weekend of revising seem less painful :D

- Marina


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Review #20, by harrylilyjames Goodbye Memory Lane

22nd February 2009:
hey!
I really liked this fic, I feel so sorry for poor Frank =[ I like the way you wrote in his flashbacks. I actually thought I was going to start crying near the middle of the story- it was really well done.
There were a few mistakes, like missing words that if you just re-read it you will spot them, one is "in infectious", 'in' suppose to be 'is' here? and just little things like that.
Seriously I loved the last part where he's trying to remember who he is and can't...awe- poor Frank, a tear swelled up in my eye when I read it...really awesome work with getting his feelings across =D
9/10

Author's Response: I'll go through and check for those errors myself, but it's being betad at the moment so hopeful she'll catch those :)

thank you so much for reviewing! I was worried that I hadnt gone into enough detail, but I'm so flattered to think you nearly cried! that's always a mark that I've done my job, so I'm so happy (which is kind of weird; i'm happy that i nearly made you cry XD) I'm sure you know what I mean ;)

thanks again for reviewing!

- Marina


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Review #21, by Femme_Fatale Goodbye Memory Lane

20th February 2009:
Wow, that was wonderfully written. Your descriptions were on point and very informative. Your characterization of Alice was very good. I love the flashbacks, they really put it into the story, know what i mean? They really carry the storyline far.

Good job 10/10

Author's Response: thank you so much! really, I didnt realise what an effect this would have on the readers :P but thank you so much! I can't say thank you enough XD

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Review #22, by FutureAggie09 Goodbye Memory Lane

20th February 2009:
That was shiveringly good. VERY well written =]

Author's Response: thank you very much!

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Review #23, by Indigo Seas Goodbye Memory Lane

20th February 2009:
Wow, Marina, that was... Yeah, wow. I'm not quite sure what else to say... It was very, very detailed, which is probably the reason it evokes such great emotions. Great, great job. I couldn't tear my eyes off the page, and that's saying something. ^__^ Fantastic, brilliant, amazing fic. I was absolutely enthralled with it.
10/10

- Rin

Author's Response: aw Rin! It's the unexpected reviews like this which really blow me over! Knowing that this comes from you means all the more :) Thank you so much, I'm so pleased you enjoyed it :D

- Marina


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Review #24, by datbenik513 Goodbye Memory Lane

20th February 2009:
Marina, dearest,

I hate when you are doing this to me...I feel like an orange, just squeezed uit and thrown away. This was so utterly and completely angsty, painful, tragic; totally different from your other stories I've read so far.

Every word, every sentence is emanating the very essence of the sheer madness claiming the Longbottoms' sanity, they were just keeping me at the edge of my seat.

Frank's desperation, as he's trying to stick to what little of memories he's still left, as he's feeling his life, his sanity's slowly slipping away, is just so breathtakingly realistic.

Sweetheart, you deserve your own star on the Walk of Fame.

A perfect one, truly.

With love,

Zoltan
*** needs to get some fresh air and clean his head ***

Author's Response: thank you so much! I never tire of receiving reviews from you :P

I'm surprised that you found this different from my other stories; angst is my speciality, and so I tend to stick with it. Admittedly it's a bit darker than my normal stuff, but I think it needed it :)

A star on the walk of fame? haha i wish XD I'll just stick to getting nice reviews :P

thank you so much for reviewing :)

- Marina


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Review #25, by Faith1 Goodbye Memory Lane

19th February 2009:
that was beautifully written! it seemed like that's exactly what happened to alice and frank-the way they ended. awesome job =)

Author's Response: thank you so much!

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